But Bracton does have a lot to say about monsters, duels, bastardy, concubines, sturgeon “and other royal fish,” the “pillory and the ducking-stool," and "a judgment with infamy.”

That in heraldry, a bend sinister indicates bastardy.

Following that blockbuster Uruguay and Portugal will put their credentials to the test in a match with the potential to redefine footballing bastardy.

The arm-wrestle between Portugal and Uruguay on Saturday will see a meeting of two teams with the necessary tournament bastardy, plus elite attackers in form.

“All these great men use what comes to them from the Other to modify the Self, to bastardize it, for genius wants bastardy.”