Carlton was born on August 16, 1980, in [[Milford, Pennsylvania]], the first of three children of Edmund "Ed" Carlton, a pilot, and Heidi Lee, a pianist and school music teacher.<ref>{{cite magazine|url=https://people.com/archive/key-whiz-vol-58-no-3/| archive-url=https://ghostarchive.org/archive/20211022/https://people.com/archive/key-whiz-vol-58-no-3/| archive-date=2021-10-22|title=Key Whiz|date=July 15, 2002|magazine=[[People (magazine)|People]] | volume = 58 | number = 3}}{{cbignore}}</ref><ref name=":0">{{Cite web |last=E Jones |first=Ellen |date=2019-05-28 |title=Why is A Thousand Miles the most referenced song in cinema? |url=http://www.theguardian.com/music/2019/may/28/why-is-vanessa-carlton-a-thousand-miles-the-most-referenced-song-in-cinema |access-date=2022-04-09 |website=[[The Guardian]] |language=en}}</ref> She has a sister, Gwen, and a brother, Edmund.<ref>{{cite web |last=Lamb |first=Christopher |url=http://www.teenmusic.com/2002/04/29/vanessa-carlton-a-thousand-miles-to-here |title=Vanessa Carlton: A Thousand Miles To Here |publisher=TeenMusic.com |date=April 29, 2002 |access-date=February 14, 2013 |archive-date=August 31, 2014 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20140831203950/http://www.teenmusic.com/2002/04/29/vanessa-carlton-a-thousand-miles-to-here |url-status=dead }}</ref><ref>{{Cite web |date=November 30, 2007 |title=Singer-Songwriter Vanessa Carlton Indeed Loves Ruby's in the Afternoon |url=https://www.grubstreet.com/2007/11/singersongwriter_vanessa_carlt_1.html |access-date=2022-04-30 |website=[[New York (magazine)#Grub Street|Grub Street]] |language=en-us}}</ref> Carlton’s mother comes from a [[Russian-Jewish]] family in [[Queens, New York]].<ref>{{Cite web |last=Tang |first=Estelle |date=2017-02-17 |title=16 Years Later, Vanessa Carlton Is Finally 'Fine' With "A Thousand Miles" |url=https://www.elle.com/culture/music/a43139/vanessa-carlton-a-thousand-miles/ |access-date=2022-04-30 |website=ELLE |language=en-US}}</ref><ref>{{cite web | url=https://www.kveller.com/vanessa-carlton-on-being-a-jewish-mom-surviving-the-music-biz/ | title=Vanessa Carlton on Being a Jewish Mom & Surviving the Music Biz | date=May 24, 2017 }}</ref> Her interest in music began at an early age. At the age of two she visited [[Disneyland]], and played "[[It's a Small World]]" on the piano when she came home. Her mother began to tutor her,<ref>[http://www.teenmusic.com/2002/04/29/vanessa-carlton-a-thousand-miles-to-here Interview by Teenmusic] {{Webarchive|url=https://web.archive.org/web/20140831203950/http://www.teenmusic.com/2002/04/29/vanessa-carlton-a-thousand-miles-to-here |date=August 31, 2014 }} (April 29, 2002)</ref><ref name="yfly">{{cite web|url=http://www.yfly.com/vanessacarlton/|title=Vanessa Carlton Bio|access-date=August 19, 2006|publisher=YFly.com|url-status=dead|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20080319112406/http://www.yfly.com/vanessacarlton/|archive-date=March 19, 2008}}</ref> and she was introduced to classical music. By the age of 9 she had become passionate about ballet, and in 1994, aged 14, she enrolled at the [[School of American Ballet]].