⃞ LAST NIGHT I dreamed that I worked for Boris Johnson, and when I handed in my notice to go and work instead for Hercule Poirot, the Prime Minister gave me a really lovely, written reference even though at the time he was being pursued by a very angry man who I’d accidentally let into the building. When I woke up, I was touched by the sentiments in the reference and wondered if, just maybe, Boris Johnson isn’t really that bad after all. Have any of your other readers been momentarily swayed by the actions of the Prime Minister in a dream?

Joe Smith, Exeter

*What a nice thought from Mr Smith. It seems the media are constantly giving our PM a hard time simply because of the way he behaves. Write in with some of the nice things that Boris has done in your dreams and we’ll redress the balance.

⃞ I’VE JUST watched a porn vid where the lead actor lifted the leading lady onto a wall-mounted wash basin in the bathroom before having sex. Could I advise anyone thinking of doing the same to take care. These kinds of wash basins are not meant to take any great weight, and for reasons of safety, I would recommend only attempting this act on a pedestal-type basin.

Billy Whiffles, Tooting

⃞ I CAN’T be alone in thinking that whilst Ming the Merciless’s huge and ornate collar is impressive, it is also extremely impractical. I imagine that when he first started wearing it in the 1930s, it was to detract attention from his baldness. These days however, attitudes have changed and a completely bald head is considered fashionable and attractive. Perhaps it’s time for Ming the Merciless to face up to his insecurities, lose the collar and learn to be accepted for the person that he is.

Phil Kitching, Isle of Jura

just wondering if any of your readers could answer a question for me? We are all used to bikini-clad young ladies walking around the boxing ring holding up the number of the next round. But what happens to those who don’t a chance to go on? If,