URIEL

By

Joseph Appel

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2009 by Joseph Appel

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

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Table of Contents

Chapter 1 - The Awakening

Chapter 2 - Earth

Chapter 3 - The Mountain

Chapter 4 - Destiny

Chapter 5 - Humans

Chapter 6 - Sariel

Chapter 7 - Reflections

Chapter 8 - Antares

Chapter 9 - The Child

Chapter 10 - Defiance

Chapter 11 - The Demon

Chapter 12 - Divine Intervention

Chapter 13 - Salvation

Chapter 14 - Dreams

Chapter 15 - The First-Yesterday

Chapter 16 - Identity

Chapter 17 - Rebirth

Chapter 18 - The Healing

Chapter 19 - Confusion

Chapter 20 - The Box

Chapter 21 - The Visit

Chapter 22 - Remembrances

Chapter 23 - The War

Chapter 24 - The Fallen

Epilogue

He cast upon them the fierceness of His anger,

Wrath, indignation, and trouble,

By sending angels of destruction among them.

Psalm 78:49

CHAPTER 1 – THE AWAKENING

My eyes opened and darkness surrounded me. I breathed, and intense heat penetrated my chest. My body burned, and I realized I lay prone on sandy ground. I tried to push my heavy body up, but skin peeled off my palms.

Can anyone hear me? I yelled, but no one answered.

Someone please help me, I screamed, but again silence overpowered the atmosphere.

I pushed through the pain and reached my knees, but the intoxicating air unbalanced my psyche and my body rocked.

I did not know what to do or where to turn, and the reality of the night-like atmosphere grew stronger.

My God, I softly said, where am I?

My heart began to beat madly, and adrenaline pushed through my veins like a wild river coursing through land. Paralyzed muscles immobilized me when I tried to get to my feet.

It was then I realized the dismay of loneliness. My head lifted, but I could only see ebony air. I become conscious that my bright radiance was no more, and then fear inscribed itself deep into my soul.

Moments in time became my enemy and something distantly flashed in my thoughts. An apparition empowered my memory and my nerves screamed when the first vision arrived.

A face appeared inches in front of me. I almost recognized it, but anger masked its beauty. My right hand reached out to caress it, but it broke apart into infinite wisps of white smoke. Then it turned and circled my throat. It squeezed and its vise-like grip choked me. I could not breathe, but then as quickly as it came, it scattered into the blackness. My burned knees embedded deeper into the sand-like ground, and I had the strangest sensation of falling.

Caustic air touched me, and hot sweat burned my skin. Pain increased on top of pain, and I smelled my own scalding flesh. I forced my eyes to remain open and the darkness cleared, or I became used to it. I did not know.

The area appeared to be a beach, but no water was distinct. Quiet waves rolled against an invisible shore. The dark water burned my feet, and I realized the surrounding elements overpowered me.

Sounds inside my mind increased, and I fought to keep them out. The elders’ voices returned and brought what was to be the first of many torments.

There is a place for those who disobey and for those who cry out for the pain of others. It is a place of dark waters and darker nights. The endless unknown surrounds infinite misery. Heed these words young morningstars and be careful, for no matter what hierarchy you are placed in, you will suffer the same anguish brought to those who swallow the wretchedness of their errors.

I searched for the voices and tried to see familiar faces that I longed for, but nothing was there. When the voices left, I hung my head and felt the first of many tears touch my cheek.

Why did I not listen, I sobbed.

Confusion radiated around me and grew stronger. I realized the place no one in the great hall dared to talk about encircled me; I was in the pits of Hades. I was desperate to leave, but knew in my heart my journey was not yet to be.

Why am I here? I screamed. What did I do?

Sinewy thighs that took me places others feared now ached with a myriad of cuts. I touched my arms, and blood flowed down my once bright skin.

Thoughts I wanted to forget pounded my body and a long fought battle emerged from my subconscious. I remembered the reality of peace and light and wondered if they would ever my mine again.

Eras came and left, yet I did not age. Fear kept me a prisoner in a place everyone dreaded.

Then familiar faces I knew for eons became images of a fainted glorious past. A brutal combat stirred my mind and images drifted in and out of my conscious nightmares. I closed my hand and quickly opened it, but my sword did not appear. A veil of sadness covered me.

Then a voice echoed in the distance. He bleeds. I searched for the sound, but I was still alone.

I turned when another voice rang out. Remiel is fatally wounded!

My eyes widened. No, I desperately said. It cannot be. He cannot be dead.

Then faces surrounded me. I recognized them and sorrow overwhelmed me. Lights of the Heavens, I called out. How can you be here? This place is not for us.

They were angels trained to protect and serve, but now they were nothing more than specters cast to the bowels of infinity. I suffered their torment and knew Hell embraced us in its callous arms.

Don’t go, I asked when they drifted above me into darkness. And time continued on its cruel path.

I cannot remember what happened. How long have I been here? What did I do, how did I get here? I said and looked around.

My lips parted slightly when the clouded wisps returned. A hazy image appeared, and I jumped when the image formed a face.

Michael, I said. He appeared as clear as the day we both stood in front of the gates of the first Heaven. But now his face raged with horrific intensity.

Please save me, I asked, but he looked through me and his rage continued. Why are you angry Michael? I said to his face floating in front of me. He did not answer he just blankly stared. Then voices inside my memory erupted.

Where is Michael? A voice exclaimed. I turned in the direction where the sound came from, but no one was there.

The gates are falling, another voice screamed. I pivoted my body wildly trying to find the voice, and sand ripped more skin off my knees.

The third Heaven has fallen, there are too many, an echo resounded. I grabbed my ears, but the voices came from within me.

They are everywhere, our brothers are dead, many voices cried out. My body tensed when silence filled the air. Then I looked up when I heard the familiar sound of countless wings beating the sky, but nothing was there except horrific screams of agony

I cannot listen anymore, I pleaded to an empty sky.

I gathered the courage and crawled on my knees away from the burning tide. The illusions continued and changed with time as I crawled for what seemed ages. Eventually Michael’s face disappeared, but other dreams continued.

I cannot bear this torture, I yelled.

I tried to get up but my weakened body would not allow it, and I continued crawling. Eventually I came to a rock I did not foresee. I reached out to grab it for support, but the strength in my arms left me ages ago.

The rock’s edges were razor sharp. When I moved my hands to lift my body, the edges sliced my skin open. Through my pain I brought my palm up and opened it. I hung my head when my light did not appear.

Survival overcame my fear. I moved to within inches of the rock and my nostrils burned from its acidic air. The black stone blended into the dark atmosphere, and its heat burned my skin.

I yelled again, there was a time when all I needed was to think and I could pulverize this rock. I shook my head, but now I am a broken being, a soul without a purpose.

I crawled to the right, and fought to find a way around the massive stone barrier. I knew in my heart that I would crawl forever, the rock would be my hell.

The visions returned as I crawled and became my nemesis. My tormented mind forced me to watch my loyal comrades fight against Michael, their brightness replaced by eternal rebellion. They soon realized their wrong decision and I wept for them.

I continued on my knees fighting the hallucinations, but the visions surged and I watched Michael toss traitorous angels aside as a child flings its toys in a tantrum. They screamed in agony when the universe swallowed them.

The images quickly vanished and I stopped. I grabbed a handful of the cutting sand and pulverized it.

Then a burst of light appeared. The dawn of time flashed in seconds, and in the blink of an eye, I saw what I did not want to see. Lives came and went and the everlasting confrontation destroyed the Heavens.

Michael is slaughtering everyone, I said aloud.

The light his sword emitted blinded me, and I could not remember why he massacred so many. The dream continued. Torn wings littered the universe and blood followed them. I stared at twisted bodies floating endlessly. I watched angelic warriors spiral to oblivion. I heard them scream, Save us, but I was helpless.

Time lingered as I crawled, and I did not know for how long. My tears cooled my burned knees.

Then I became aware of what the hallucinations were. Oh my God, I screamed, the war. It did happen.

I raised my head where Heaven should be and stared, but emptiness filled my eyes. Stars that once directed me home were gone. My tears flowed faster and I wept for the second time. When the realization formed that banishment became my destiny, I yelled again. My God, can Heaven be gone?

Sadness overcame me and I was ashamed of my weakness. I reached out to my left and the rock was gone. My strength increased and I finally stood on my feet. I wandered for a time my mind could not comprehend.

Then a gust of wind brushed against me. It intensified in strength, forcing me to catch my balance.

And then I felt the pain.

The wind picked up minute particles of sand and embedded them into my skin. The unbearable pain forced me to run.

The wind followed me; it knew I could not escape. Sand strengthened by the wind’s speed cut into my skin like precision steel grinded to a razor’s edge.

The coarse sand gradually turned to honed rock and cut the bottom of my feet. It was impossible to gain speed.

The wind suddenly stopped and I felt the biting rocks under me. My weak body fell ripping my knees and shins. I winced in agony and felt the ground soak up my blood. Angrily I picked up a stone and crushed it, but its acid touched me and more pain followed.

I am lost, I said, without any hope.

I looked ahead at nothingness and strained my voice. I yield. You have broken me. I accept that I am in the belly of the bottomless pit. Please help me distinguish how long I have been here. I know You hear me, You always hear me and I beg You. I have no understanding of time and I have no idea how I came to this place of revulsion. If You refuse to answer me at least allow Michael, Raphael, anyone to acknowledge me. At least give me a glimmer of hope of what I am, and why I am here.

But the knowledge I longed for would not come. Then I turned when the terror-stricken sounds began. They were the voices spoken of in the great hall, the voices of those who pleaded for an end to their misery. They were souls who begged for forgiveness, but will never receive it. Abysmal echoes spoke in unison and penetrated my ears with a shrill that deafened me.

Will You have my voice sound in torture and agony as they, I screamed. Is that Your plan for me? Is my future to have my insignificant voice heard, and beg anyone to end my misery?

Then a distant voice I could barely make out, spoke. Michael humiliated you young morningstar and your brothers did not stop him.

I am not alone, I said, and my body shivered. I looked around, but saw nothing. Boldness loosened my voice.

I will not succumb to your haunting sounds. I yelled.

I gathered courage and ran, but the voice followed me.

Do not leave. You are one of us now. You are as forsaken as we, trust in us, the voice said.

No, I yelled back. He did not discard me, He did not.

You know our words are true. We are all the same, angels no more. Unite with us.

Other voices joined in and their echoes grew louder the closer they approached me. Multiple voices began their haunting melody and I continued running, but I had nowhere to go. My legs moved faster, but the sounds following me were quicker. I raised my head and looked up.

Please, I begged, someone help me.

Heaven is gone young one and your brothers are no more, the voices relentlessly persisted. You will become one like us and we will protect you.

You cannot protect me, no one can anymore. I answered. I will not become like you.

Anguish overcame me and I stopped running. I was ready to yield to them, but then I saw a light, a flicker of hope in the distance, and I ran harder.

Please do not leave us, the voices begged.

When I reached the light, I stopped. A cliff stood at my feet and dropped straight down. Flickering lights below beckoned me and the voices closed in. They pleaded with me.

Do not go down to the abyss, stay with us young morningstar. We are your brothers.

I ignored them and moved closer to the endless sky in front of me. I stretched my arm for hope to caress me.

I did not know where I was and turned my body back to the voices. In front of me lay inexhaustible blackness. I turned back and saw something I did not think I would ever see again, light.

Night stirred below, and my skin felt the warmth of a disappearing sun. Then I did something that time did not allow, I smiled.

I was ready to leap with crystal wings and put my hands on top of my shoulders. My anguish returned, and sinister laughter filled my ears.

Your wings are gone young morningstar, along with ours. They were cast to the far end of the universe.

This is endless torture, I wept. What is below is now meaningless. It calls me but I cannot go. Without my wings I am nothing more than an empty being.

My body tensed when the sounds continued.

Purgatory is not your answer young one. Come back to us.

I know your voice, I said, but not your face.

Your holy one abandoned you, another voice spoke out. Stay with us.

I am not abandoned, my quivering voice answered. I am the seventh of the seven.

Menacing laughter touched me. Then tell us seventh of the seven. Why are you here?

I do not know, I finally confessed. There had to be a mistake.

Foolish one, you fell as we did. Your despair is our hopelessness. Our misery is your desperation. Purgatory is not your answer, but your inferno. The ancient voices remained at a distance, but their frightening sounds chilled me.

I closed my eyes and listened to my tears sizzle on the burning rocks under me. Yet the air next to the cliff cooled my skin. I moved closer to the edge.

"Is Heaven gone? I whispered aloud. Why did You cast me down with the rest of the fallen ones? Dear God, what did I do?"

We committed errors, a voice resounded.

I lowered my head in sorrow and accepted my fate. I knew the penalty for my fault would not be death.

I will never cease to exist, will I? I asked. I accepted my chastisement and wept for the third and final time.

Then I bravely raised my head and continued speaking. I fought for you Lord. I remember the blood and tired flesh. We prevailed defending You. How could you send me here?

Then a loud bellowing voice rang out from distant darkness. The ground shook when it spoke and there was complete silence.

You are not His anymore morningstar, the voice resonated.

I turned, afraid to hear. Moments later the frightening voice continued.

We have listened to your pleadings and have heard your misery. Know that you belong to us. Your holy one banished you when He did not have to. Michael rejected you. Your brothers Raphael, Gabriel and the others do not remember you. Come, we wait for you. You are ours now.

Silence filled the dark sky.

Leave me alone, I screamed.

When my tears subsided, I turned and looked back at the uninviting blackness. I shuddered. Then a cool breeze touched my shoulders.

What do I do? I asked, knowing no one would answer me. This limbo is better than Hades, but I cannot endure much more.

The remaining light below the embankment allowed me to see the creatures I once loved and protected. The choice of joining them or wandering forever in the blackness of eternity excruciated me. I tensed my muscles and clenched my fists. Blood flowed down my palms.

I looked at an empty sky. In all my eons I never thought I would be in this predicament. I am isolated in hell and left alone. How can it be, I am the seventh? I screamed. Then I bowed my head, but now on my own.

I turned left and right but saw nothing. Then I softly said, I am not a morningstar anymore, it is time for me to die.

I looked around and hoped for someone to embrace me, but I knew no one listened.

You, I screamed, you did this. And I fell to my knees.

Please do not let me go down to the humans, I pleaded. I never despised their creation, but there must be another way.

My thoughts moved quickly. I grabbed my head and tried to end the pounding that would not stop.

I looked down at tents scattered on the sand at the bottom of the embankment. Clouds hovered over the mountains to the east and the hue of pink remained. The color brought me a little joy.

A few people scattered about in the tired sun’s light. They marched about like insects searching for food.

I am humiliated, I said as I looked down. You had me protect them, I defended the innocents, but now I am helpless.

Sharp stones pointed out of the rugged sides of the steep cliff. I knew death would come to anyone who fell from its dangerous top.

Destiny waits for those who stumble. I said, and remembered the voices of the elders. Without my wings, I will plummet and die.

My mind raced. Do I wander about in this darkness, in this place of eternal strife, or do I jump and have my existence wiped from the Ageless One’s book for all-time.

Do not leave this place youngest of the seven, the bellowing voice rang out.

Fear crept inside me, The voice followed me. I said.

I knew I had to make a choice, and choices are sometimes unpleasant.

I turned, and for the last time I glanced at the eternity of sightlessness behind me. I know what I must do, I shouted for anyone to hear. This cliff shall be my worthy end, a finish for my unfaithfulness to God. I pray He forgives me for not killing the betrayer of eternity.

I inched closer to the rim and trembled. I knew I was about to end my once bright existence. A breeze fluttered over me and for a second I felt comfort.

I hope my death will come swiftly, I said. The great book shall deservedly erase my place forever.

I stood with closed eyes and dejectedly hung my head. A tear fell, but I did not know a gentle wind grabbed it before it touched the ground.

Through my weakness, I raised my torn and battered arms and opened them like an eagle spreading its wounded wings.

I shall die, my soft voice choked, but know that my love for You will never end, and I leaped.

And I Uriel, the seventh archangel of God, fell to earth.

CHAPTER 2 - EARTH

The wind touched me as I descended. I cried for my brothers knowing they would never see me again. I turned and faced the bleak sky as I waited for my end, but above me, crystal dust shining from a distant star drifted down. My dust, I choked. It touched me, and entered my core. I smiled knowing it waited all this time for me.

Then I felt them. The root of my wings tingled inside my body and grew. They emerged and I smiled.

Wind caressed my body and took my coal-black hair into the clouds. The strands vibrated and I swore I heard music.

The warmth of the sun’s residual light touched my wings and gave them life. They silently moved, and for the first time in ages, joy entered me. I floated with ease and tears washed the blood from my face.

We are one, I said with gladness.

I landed on soft sand next to a dimly lit large tent. I entered, and thankfully no one was inside. For the first time in my existence, I was aware of my nakedness. I could not allow the humans to see me. A tunic hung on a piece of wood to my right. It was small but it covered me.

A large stone pot filled with wine stood at the far corner of the tent. Bowls of dates sat on a table to the right of the tent’s opening. An odor came from a wooden plate to the right of the dates. Fresh baked bread drifted into my nostrils.

I had watched humans eat but never noticed the succulent odor of their food. To the right of the bread sat a small jar of wine waiting to fill two stone goblets next to it, and I realized I thirsted.

Then I saw them, pillows sitting on the floor to the left of the table. Fatigue overcame me, and I realized that since my ordeal I had not rested. I moved toward them but stopped. I knew it would be impossible to stay there. I sighed, My stature will frighten them. I do not want to alarm anyone.

Antares came into my thoughts and I shuddered. I stepped outside into the cool soft sand with soundless steps. People were in continuous motion in and out of their tents. I carefully moved four tents away and noticed small clay buildings in the distance on the other side of a wide river.

I turned back and camels stood in pairs next to each tent. I thought, If the animals notice my scent, it would create a stir.

Memories came back and I closed my eyes. Look at them, Raphael. Can you see them? I asked excitedly so long ago.

Raphael, the largest archangel laughed at my eagerness.

Calm down little one, he said.

We hid ourselves inside a white cloud a hundred feet above the ground and watched two people complacently gathering berries.

We watched them smile and laugh as they fed each other. They walked around the green field contently, while the sun’s rays shined on them. Cool breezes touched them and trees plentiful with branches stood tall, ready to shade them if they wanted to get out of the sun. The humans were so different then.

I watched a tree open its leaves and expose its fresh fruit, sweetened from a mist that came out of the ground. Raphael sighed when he looked at the two humans below. They always seem so happy Uriel, he said, yet I noticed a disappointment in his voice.

Can we get closer Raphael? I urged.

No.

Why Raphael? Come, it will be fun.

We are not leaving this cloud. Besides, I can smell them from here, he pointed out. I noticed his temper began to rise.

I do not smell anything. What is their odor like Raphael? I have never been this close to a human before. I asked ready to get closer to the ground. My wings fluttered and Raphael noticed my excitement. His eyes concentrated on my wings.

They will see you Uriel. You are too young to be undetectable. Behave.

Do not worry, Raphael. They will never see me.

Uriel, stop it now. Your persistence can be annoying. I do not want to get into trouble. You know He can see everything. This is close enough. Michael told me to bring you here so you could get your first glimpse at the humans. You cannot let them see you. They are too young, and you are too obstinate.

Then tell me Raphael, what do they smell like?

Trust me Uriel not like us. Raphael fumed. They have their own distinct stench. It is nothing you want to remember.

You should not talk like that Raphael. You know He loves them. Besides, what harm can they do to us? For that matter, what harm can they do to themselves, look how peaceful they are.

Things change Uriel.

How bad can it change Raphael, this place is beautiful. I remember the first time you brought me here, it is still the same with humans or not. Besides, if He made it for the humans, why should it bother anyone?

"That is the point. He did not make this place for them. He originally made it for us. Do you remember when I first brought you here? It was uninhabited. You marveled at its beauty. This was supposed to be ours, a