Copyright © 2014 by Zenobia.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Rev. date: 02/17/2014

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CONTENTS

Acknowledgements

Crecia

As We Lay

Sasha

Runaway

I can’t help it

Keesha the Cheater

Taylor-Bump and Grind

Foolish

Torn

Crecia-

Taylor—Tonight is the Night

The Joy of Christmas

Jayson’s Blues 2—What’s a Man to do?

Christmas First

A Pain in the Ass

Christmas Bahama

Play it again Sam

Miami Blues

Daydreamn’

Taylor—Kissing You

Ain’t no Party like… .

The Gift

Liquid Courage

Crecia—Frontin’

Keesha’s Blues

Love Don’t Live Here Anymore

Wild

Conflict my A$$

Half on a Baby

Shower Scene

Girl’s Weekend

In the Midnight Hour

My Truth

Crecia

Killed in NYC

Baby

Hurt

Love Don’t live here

Sasha: Sunday Dinner Pt. 1

I smell Dick!

Sasha: Sunday Dinner Pt. 2

Why can’t they just leave me alone?

After

Taylor—Blame Game

What Have I done?

Taylor—The Call

Father or Lover

Taylor—Game

Gossip

Sasha—Home

Crecia—The New Breed

Madame Taylor

The Wedding

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Hunger, Humility and Grace

Team Zenobia: Melissa Oliver, Kevin and Trudy Eudell, Lawona Smith, VJT, LS, Elizabeth Hernandez-Spina, Kim Joe-Smith, Valerie Pierce, Janean Owens, Katrina Johnson, Jacquille Carter, Mildred Hamer, Diann Lovelace, Sheila Skeeter, LaToya Bellamy, Henry Heard, Karen Henry, Cathy Snyder, Cynthia Lee, Desiree Register and Judith McCleese. In one way or another you have fed, prayed, clothed and nurtured me, I thank you all.

A special thank you to, Rochelle Graves-McKoy for your friendship, knowledge and keeping me in check and to Pamela Ricks, the best PR person and mom in the world!!

Lastly, to the two best people in my life, I love you. MEX&D for life!!!

This book is dedicated to Vonda Venessa Nowlin, Simply Beautiful. You were the first to believe in my talent, the best friend any person could ever have and I will always love you, RIP.

CRECIA

K ing slams the door and I dart for the bathroom, closing the door behind me, locking it. I turn on the shower and just stood in the mirror. My face looked like I had walked into the wall repeatedly, but the Wrath of King was the source of this injury. King is my baby’s daddy and like a pit bull off its leash, he attacks without warning. I look at the cut above my eye, and my swollen cheek, thinking what’s next? I used to be so pretty. I wipe the steam from the mirror. Wow and I get a good look at my reflection. I look old and worn and I have no one to blame but myself.

I hear King and his man T. talking. They must be leaving out. I am relieved. How many times can I go through this? I pull my bra and panties off and I feel my shoulder pop. I moved it around. The last thing I wanted to do was go to the hospital.

I was so happy when I met King. I was at Club Luxury Browns, celebrating my 21st birthday with my bitches. King and some of his boyz kept sending us drinks; they were trying to come over to our table. I thought King was cute, but most importantly, he was a thug. I love thugs. King’s eyes were dark and mischievous, his skin even darker. He had a small cut above his lip, and when he smiled he revealed his grills. It was love at first sight and when he gave me that mean dick, it was no stopping us. We were fucking every night and day. Shit, I know when we made Qwentara. She came eleven months later. We fucked so much and so hard, one time we broke my bed down and kept going. We were seeing each other so much, King moved in after a month. I had just moved into Swanson Homes, it was my first apartment. I liked having in house dick.

After Qwentara was born, the beatings started. The first time was after one of our Friday night parties. He accused me of flirting with one of his boyz; but it was the other way around. At first, he would snatch my ass up, and then came the blows to my face. I knew he was going to do it again but I loved him. It was nothing for King to give me blows to the head out in public, and make me perform oral sex on him as his boyz watched. I really wasn’t offended at first; I just thought King was proud of his girl and how I put it down. He called me the Chief Head Hunter, but now I can’t believe I ever stooped so low.

The warm water stung as it hit my thigh. I looked down, I had a bruise there. I must have gotten it when I hit the stairs trying to run up them. This has to end, I can’t take no more. It’s not like I can’t get another nigga’. I can and King knows it. This is my place. I get food stamps, and TANF; I’ll be straight, but I am going to miss his scratch from selling. I love him; I just wish he would stop beating my ass.

AS WE LAY

I rolled over and found Jayson sleeping. He was snoring so hard, he scared me. I looked around and realized I was in Jayson’s bed. I lifted up the duvet and yes we were both naked. I glanced over the room, he had very nice taste. He had a nice color scheme. My head was hurting. I looked over at the clock; it read 8:12 in the morning. As the sun peered through the shades, I glanced over Jayson’s body, he was packing. In the morning Roman would be home and what was I going to tell Jayson? I know he is in love with me. My feelings are all mixed up right now. I fought hard to get Roman and now I fuc ked up.

I slipped out of Jayson’s bed and into his bathroom. I flipped on the light and I was greeted by purple and gold, his fraternity Omega Psi Phi colors. I laughed as I looked around; he was such an alpha male with flair. I turned on the shower and did a once over my body in the mirror I had passion marks on my titties; oh shit. How was I going to explain this? Roman is on me every night. I stepped into the shower and closed the shower door behind me. I lathered my body up with soap; as if I could wash away the guilt I was feeling.

The shower door opened up and Jayson stepped in with a big rock hard dick.

Keesha you are so damn fine. He grabbed me and began kissing me. His hands played with my soapy body.

What are you doing? I asked.

I’m admiring my baby. Is there something wrong with that? He asked. Before I could answer, he stuck his tongue in my mouth. I could feel the heat again. Jayson poured the soap all over me, between my legs, my back. I began to do the same. His touches were sensual as he rubbed me down, like I was a baby.

I love you woman, He whispered. I couldn’t say it back. With every touch, I felt his passion for me. It took my breath away. Jayson looked me in my eyes as he fucked the pussy. I held on tight as I rode his dick. I felt sixteen again. I am fucked!

SASHA

I t was nice to know I was missed. There was a note taped to the door, Makasa had been by and was at the Dubinsky Center waiting for me. The Dubinsky Center was a place for FIT students to chill, watch movies, and kick it. I knew he would be waiting for some juicy news about Chauncey and me. I wasn’t in the mood. I surveyed the room and didn’t notice anything out of order. Grace had been to Long Island to her family’s home for the weekend and I trust she had not taken any of my clothes. I was wondering how Taylor was doing with the news. Daddy was her ever ything.

I decided to unpack before heading out, when I received a text from Chauncey. I was supposed to text him when I touched down in NYC. I had forgotten. I wanted to share my pain, but I didn’t know what to do. I was happy that I had finished the sketches for my Accessory Design class. I made up an original logo for my future line of purses. I had been working on something special for the Student Runway Show in the spring; I am going to kill’em.

I wanted to show my parents I can do this. I am not a fuck up. The fucked up one is my daddy. I wanted to please him so much but he is just another selfish ass man. I hate the way he plays my mommy. I keep saying it is between them, but their drama affects us all. I grab my phone and text Chauncey. I know he is wondering why I haven’t. The time we spent together was great. I needed it. Chauncey has surprised me. He is rough and comes from the hood, but he is smart, fine and can fuck. He has a quietness about him that is sexy. Instead of texting me back, he called.

Hey boo, what up girl? I was waiting for you to get wit me, He expressed.

Baby, I was gonna get back wit you. I had fun, I replied. He was much more playful and insists that I call him my man. I like the forceful way he takes charge. Chauncey was feeling me and he let me know. I asked him about coming to NYC for Christmas, because I was not coming home for the holidays and doubt mommy was either. We talked nasty to each other and he reminded me about how good I made him feel. Just when we were getting to the good stuff, I heard his ugly sister’s voice over the phone. She is a pain in the ass. I heard her say she needed two and then Chauncey said he would call me right back. I know he sells drugs, but it was cool with me.

After about ten minutes, he called me back. He told me one of his man’s from back in the day came around. I know he is lying, but I don’t say anything. We got back to our nasty talk and I was feeling quite nice, when Grace came in. I was startled. I told Chauncey I had to go. I can tell he was disappointed but I promised to keep the pussy tight for him. After our good nights, Grace wanted all the juice about my trip. I told her what she really wanted to know. She wanted to know if Chauncey and I smashed. She never talks about her love life,