I Existed
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About this ebook
“I Existed” is a very compelling story, lots of plot twists and waves of emotions...suicide, incest, teenage pregnancy, rage, love, hate, forgiveness...The author pretty much covered it all! It is an easy read but I have to be honest, I’m not sure I like the ending I understand the point the author made, but it left me with no
L.C. Markland
L.C. Markland is a local author. He and Judy, his wife, reside in North Canton, OH. He graduated from the Akron East High School, the University of Akron, and Malone University of Canton OH. Before writing novels, Paul served two pastorates in the Akron/Canton area and directed a non-profit organization. Health issues led to an early retirement in 2014. Since then, he has written several works, "Whispers in the Willows" is among them. He uses the pen name L. C. Markland in memory of his father. His other books are "All Things Work Together for Good," "Winds of Change," "Killing Me Softly," "Hard to Say I'm Sorry," "No Holds Barred: No Holding, Back," "The Whispering Woods," "The Widows Web," "The Widows Web Unwoven," "I Existed," and "The Widow's Web Unwoven: The Mitchells' Mystery."
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I Existed - L.C. Markland
Acknowledgments
As the old saying goes, Behind every great man is a great woman.
The same is true while composing a novel. Behind every great author is a great friend.
In the past four years, I have written ten novels. Through it all, my friends stepped in to read, proof, reread, and review my works. At times, they were bold and brash. They shared their perceptions and thoughts about my work. That was a difficult pill to swallow. Yet, in the end, they spared me from much heartache and embarrassment. Other times, they encouraged me to continue writing. They, like the author, wanted to know the ending.
These people deserve my utmost attention and respect. They are Shirley Rice Verhey (author of Love Abounds More,
and If Pews Could Talk):
my wife, Judy Markland; friends Raymond Shook, Christine Payerle Hagenbaugh, Linda Smith, and Tesa Strausser (author of Love Never Fails
).
If there is any one person I thank, it is my mother. She is the driving force behind my writings. She passed away in 2003. She always wanted to write a novel, yet believed she lacked the education and experience to do so. As a child, she taught me the importance of literature. I owe much to her.
Foreword
Honestly, I do not know where to begin. There are many factors that prompted me to write I Existed.
The thought started when my first grandson was born. I have the privilege of caring for him on a regular basis. Holding him makes me realize the importance of life. It also reminds me of the sanctity of life. Each day, he brings and shows me new and simple things. His development outside the womb is nothing less than what occurs within the womb.
His birth, sparked on emotions I long forgotten, or I chose not to remember. Several years ago I became intimate with a young lady. Our paths crossed while in training. What started out as an innocent relationship became something much more. If truth be told, I was the aggressor. Prior to our chance encounter, I completed an operation that went terribly array. In the process of executing orders, several friends lost their lives. For whatever reason, I was spared.
Life, for me, meant absolutely nothing. I had no conscience. It was not until an old roommate contacted me when I learned of this young lady’s fate. He informed me she ended her life along with her child’s. Yes, she was carrying my child. I had no clue. Subsequently, my roommate questioned my character as a person, as a man, and as a leader.
In many ways, my friend was correct. Two lives were lost because of me. I tried to justify my actions but there was no excuse. I deliberately misled a young woman: a young woman who cared. I was responsible for her demise as well as our child’s.
While the birth of my grandson breathed new life in me, it does not negate the fact of who I was and what I did.
When I sat down to work on this work, I never realized the emotions fueled on by my research. On one hand, I came to appreciate the act of creation. I learned the dynamics of conception as well as a child’s development within the womb. On the other hand, it drove the point home as to my personal culpability.
As such, I decided to tackle this issue on differing planes. I Existed
is directed toward a teenage girl’s response on learning she is with child. It moves toward other people’s reactions. It looks deep into the heart of everyone involved. It is coupled and complicated by the laws governing and protecting the rights of some while ignoring the rights of others.
Hopefully, the novel entices the reader to rethink his or her position on life.
Personally, I was never a proponent of abortion. My stand has been, and always is, that all people have a choice. If they must choose, then they need to be responsible, accept the consequences and culpability for the decisions made.
Returning to my friend of long ago, had I known of her condition, I would have accepted full responsibility for the choices she and I made. Instead, she opted to terminate her life as well as our child. Never was I given the opportunity to prove myself. As the father, I was denied the right to raise my child. To this day, I must wonder what and how my life would have been different had I known the truth.
The birth of my grandson has definitively ignited my interests in this issue. Though most readers are left to conclude the conclusion of this work, I am sure my personal biases are brought to the forefront. But in the end, it is for the reader to decide.
Chapter One
This book is about Zachary Taylor and his life. Throughout the course of this work, you, the reader, will be introduced to certain aspects of Zachary Taylor’s life. Many of the details described occur within his mother’s womb, others are pertinent to the life God had intended for him.
Before I begin, please note Zachary Taylor was conceived out of wedlock. His mother, Carol, was nothing more than a senior in high school. Though she came from a lower-middle class family, she was extremely popular. Her athleticism, academics, coupled with her attractiveness, put her above the rest. She was hot! Yet, regardless of her popularity in school, she struggled with her personal identity. Her father was nothing more than a workaholic and alcoholic. If he was not serving his community as a second-rate citizen, then he was serving himself to a bottle of Canadian Club.
Her mother, Maria, on the other hand, was a woman of great faith. It was Maria’s faith that kept her deadlocked in a dead-end marriage. Sure there were times she felt compelled to terminate the conjugal bonds that held her in bondage, but she feared excommunication from her church. Instead, Maria would always look for that silver lining in a thundercloud.
In her pursuit to keep the family glued together, everything seemed to unravel. Her husband’s drinking intensified as well as his verbal assaults on Maria and Carol. Eventually, it was he who made the decision to vacate his responsibilities to the home. One day, he had enough. He had enough of working a job that led nowhere. He had enough of the demons that drained his will to fight. And he had enough of how drinking became his only resort. His only recourse was found in death. He came home from work, engulfed a fifth of whiskey, walked to his closet, pulled out his 38-special, went to the bathroom where he took aim and fired. Within a fraction of a second, he was finally at peace. His blood and brain matter splattered across the shower stall.
It was Carol who heard the shot and rushed to the scene. It was Carol who found her father’s lifeless body. She tried to conceptualize and rationalize everything, but couldn’t. All she could surmise was that she was to blame. Who could blame her?
For as long as she could remember, she was the source of her parent’s problems. They were, of course, high-school lovers. As a result, they became emotionally, and then intimately involved. She was the product of a romance that happened so long ago. She was also the purpose her parents married. Had she not been conceived, things would have been different, or at least that is what she was told.
There in this still and sullen place, she sunk her back against the bathroom wall and sobbed. It was her fault. It was her untimely birth that ultimately led to her father’s untimely death.
Maria found father and daughter in the bathroom. The former was dead. The latter wished she was never born. The guilt was too much for her to bear. Time and time again Carol heard her parents argue over their problems. Carol, by far, was the common denominator between them. Sure, Maria did all she could to comfort her daughter, but her words fell on deaf ears. Carol could not comprehend how both parents claimed to love her, yet hate one another because of her.
This is where Zachary’s story begins. Unbelievably, it begins where another’s life had ended.
Chapter Two
The day of the funeral was wet and cold. The seasons were torn between summer and autumn. The air