Lakeboat (2000)
J.J. Johnston: Stan
Quotes
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Stan : Boy, was I drunk last night.
Joe Pitko : I'm *still* drunk.
Stan : That wine. You drink wine, it dehydrates you. When you drink water the next morning, it activates the alcohol.
Joe Pitko : I'm so hung over I can't see.
Stan : Can't see? I can't even talk.
Joe Pitko : I can't even fuckin' think straight.
Stan : You couldn't think straight *last night*.
Joe Pitko : I was drunk last night.
Stan : You're *still* drunk.
Joe Pitko : Yeah.
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Fred : Steven Seagal is the strongest guy in ten years.
Stan : You know what? You are truly an idiot. You could have said that in the dark, and I would've known it was you, because only you could make so stupid a statement. Steven Seagal has got to be the dumbest jagoff I can remember.
Fred : Yeah, it's like you to say that.
Stan : You know about it?
Fred : I know when a guy is strong.
Stan : And that's what Seagal is, strong, huh?
Fred : Yeah.
Stan : You know, you're right. I agree with you 100%, he is strong, this Seagal. I can't think of anything that could be stronger than him, unless maybe a pile of shit!
Fred : What do you know? Who do you like?
Stan : Oh, I'll tell you. You want a real strong fella, a real type. I'd have to say Jerry Lewis. He could probably knock the shit out of this Seagal.
Fred : Aw, you don't know nothing. You don't know a fucking champ when you're looking at him in the movies, for chrissakes. This guy is stark, he's the best.
Stan : He's the best, alright. Like jacking off is better than getting laid. This guy Seagal is the biggest jackoff of all time.
Fred : Yeah, I agree with you, Stan. I see your point, the man is not stark, he's no fucking good. That's why he didn't take five fucking guys in that barroom using only one pool cue. I see your point!
