Medium (2005–2011)
Jake Weber: Joe Dubois, Dale Cosgrove, Joseph Dubois
Photos
Quotes
-
Allison Dubois : It's 9:00. How am I supposed to know you're OK? How do I know you're not lying dead somewhere?
Joe Dubois : If something had happened, somebody would've called. If I were dead, who are we kidding, you'd be the first to know.
-
Allison Dubois : Ow!
[pulls a portable phone out of couch cushions]
Joe Dubois : Wow. You one of those people who can talk out of their ass?
Allison Dubois : It's not funny.
Joe Dubois : It's kind of funny.
-
Allison Dubois : Psychic with a bad sense of time.
Joe Dubois : Do you remember where you live?
Allison Dubois : Hmm, I'm seeing a house. I'm seeing a guy in his underwear. I'm seeing lots of dishes in the sink.
Joe Dubois : It's amazing how you do that.
-
Allison Dubois : I just had a weird dream...
Joe Dubois : Of course you did. It's a day ending in "Y".
-
Joe Dubois : Ever since you made the decision not to go to law school, to go to work for the D.A. as a consultant, I don't know, you seem kinda...
Allison Dubois : Bitchy? Cranky? Pissed off?
Joe Dubois : You can read minds.
-
Allison Dubois : How can you say that?
Joe Dubois : I move my lips, I push out air. There's nothing to it.
-
Allison Dubois : [they're in bed] Here's the weird thing
Joe Dubois : You can't possibly say that with a straight face
-
[Allison is annoyed about having to clean the house before her birthday party]
Joe Dubois : Aren't you going to get that?
Allison Dubois : Why? It's one of the wicked stepsisters calling to say she's coming to the ball, but she wants me to stop and clean her fireplace.
-
Bridgette Dubois : Don't let her chop my head off!
Joe Dubois : Chop your head off?
[to Allison]
Joe Dubois : You bringing your work home with you again?
-
Joe Dubois : Call Maury Povich - tell him I'm ready for my close-up.
-
Allison Dubois : He looks pretty good, don't you think?
Joe Dubois : For a functional alcoholic - absolutely. You know he's still out there drinking by himself?
Allison Dubois : Wow, who died and appointed you the mayor of Funville?
-
[Allison is hunting for her keys]
Joe Dubois : Keys? I would think even to get a psychic learner's permit you'd have to be able to find a lost set of...
Allison Dubois : [holding them] Keys?
