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Reviews
The Killer (2024)
not even average
I write this as i watch it...45 minutes in and I am bored to tears. Cliche after cliche, predictable, nothing new or creative about this flick, and not to mention small details that someone should paid attention to. Like when she steals a motorbike, 35 minutes in or so, and grabs a helmet on the fly that was hanging on a bike near by, but she grabs it by the straps, which were tied together, and next second she is putting the helmet on, all wile riding full speed with one hand, but somehow straps are now undone so helmet is nice and ready to go on her head. Anyhow, just an average B movie, or just below, nothing else.
Borderlands (2024)
a steaming pile of hot, smelly, steaming things disguised in moving pictures
I barely managed thru 40 minutes of this horrrible trash that had the audacity to identify itself as a movie. "brand" name actors are apparently money hungry these days when they agree to film such crap. Do they read the script at all? Never played the game, i just like the genre, but this movie is horrible on all points that are supposed to make a movie good. Horrible narration, unfunny jokes, acting in line with eastern-european tv commercials...from the 60s communist era....just really really bad (for those who don't know what that was like), and animation not worthy of 12 years old "i work only weekends" homeproject animation anthusiast.
Jackpot! (2024)
who said "this is good, lets show it to the public"?
Nothing funny in this flick, trust me. Just sadness in witnessing how money is spent on such dumb projects. Overall, this movie features nothing but horrible acting, horrible balet-like stunt work and comedy that is not funny at all. Movie is so cringe it was difficult to watch so i pulled out after 40 minutes (cinematicus interruptus). I mean there are better things i can waste my life on, like watching a cat climb a tree, or watching a palm tree just swaying in the wind. Anyhow, not sure what else to write to fill the character minimum, so i'm just gona talk about that issue for a bit till i match the limit.... and viola!
Bad Boys: Ride or Die (2024)
Evolution of Bad Boys into Bad Actors grasping for past glory
Bad Boys franchise followed me from my teen years all the way to now, decades later. I've noticed something recentley, as I age myself, that actors, as they get older, lose a lot of that charisma or that "ja nes sais quoi" they had when they were young and fearless. Their acting skills deminish, their sense of self-evaluation, or at least evaluting their work, becomes blurred. Myopia, or loss of ability to be critical of oneself becomes an issue for us all one day... I think anyway. This movie, just as much as the 3rd one, shines a light on that fact. Acting has gotten pretty bad, and Martin Lawrence was hard to watch. What happened to his head, btw? Storyline, and movie action sequences, are all seen before and things turn from bad to worse in a hurry. All kinds of cliches are put on rinse and repeat, while the good ole racism jokes capture our attention once more. Overall, a B grade movie with a big budget and big expectations that falls flat on its tummy. Hope they stop the franchise now and stop embarassing themselves. Moving on from this cereal box movie concept would be a great idea, especially for Will.
South Park: The End of Obesity (2024)
not funny as it used to be...just a lame cartoon now.
I used to find SP hillarious, but this was rather lame. It started good and i thought it was going to get aggressive and funny as all hell, but all I got was this wattered down lemonade in a lipstick stained and cracked glass with no ice but with a few lemon pits in it. Just didn't do it for me. If your gonna make fun of obesity in america and the health care system, you gotta go hard at 'em and that s**t can get funny and weird and rediculous, but this was just tame and bland. Comedy that tastes like nothing is not what I expected, but that was what I got. However, watch it if you are a SP fan, but do not expect too much.
Chernobyl (2019)
as a kid in eastern Europe, I was not far away from this
I remember like it was yesterday. Public announcements over the radio telling us to stay indoors and not to eat lettuce, tomatoes and other fruits and vegetables for a while. I remember the fear of not understanding what is going on but being aware of the extreme danger all around us. I remember being afraid of the winds blowing from which ever direction, of rain from above and food from the soil. I remember the relief when they told us things are going to be ok and we are not in danger any more but I understood the potential of slight exposure and possible effects long after. I was 18 years of age and suddenly afraid for my life on a sunny morning of 1986. No one needs to experience this in their lives. Amazing TV series. One of the most horrific events in human history. Not happy about the fact that I have a personal experience of it.
Amsterdam (2022)
without big Holywood faces, this movie never sees the light of day
Boring, drawn out star-filled snooze fest of a movie you don't really need to see, trust me. The whole movie feels like an amazing opportunity to tell a great story in a fascinating way, yet all we got is a stretched out high school project that someohow got a bunch of big Hollywood stars to sign off on it. I trully don't understand what is going on in the world of show business last decade or so. Sub-par story telling gets a lot of attention and big production budgets, yet they fail to deliver the most basic of needs: enjoyable entertainment. I know that some folks found this movie "awesome", but at tyhis point I sincerely doubt their sanity.
Atlas (2024)
intolerable cartoonish nonsense
How does a decent actress become a bad actress as she grows older and more experienced in acting? I mean really, how does that happen? Exaggarated facial expressions and eye drama just made me wanna puke. Does anyone watch this before they peddle it to the audience? Does she see herself at all? Besides her horrible overacting, movie itself was a childish animation project with a general theme that tries hard to be current (AI) but is just mumbo-jumbo. I think this is the last jlo flick i will ever watch, and she used to be my fave. I know she doesn't care if i watch her stuff or not, she made her money on this garbage, but she should really stop her acting career and focus on her music and family.
Hit Man (2023)
actually really, really good flick. fun and dynamic with cool plot twists
I totally did not expect this to be an interesting movie at all. Didn't read any reviews ahead of viewing, just went in and watched it and was really pleasantly surprised. Very good chemistry between the lead roles, excellent writting and very good acting. I'm no movie expert, but i really could not see a flaw in this flick if you are looking for light and fun, but not dumbed-down, entertainment. No agendas were pushed here either, wich i appreciate greatly, and storyline unwrapped in a satisfactory way in terms of tempo, intrigueness (hmm, is that a word?) and resolution. Anyhow, not sure what else to say except have a glass of wine and watch it without expecting anything.
Poolman (2023)
movie no one needs to see
Watching this movie was like ordering a 100% irish ground beef burger with jalepinos, mozarella cheese, caramelized onions, lettuce on pickels and fries on a side, but when it finally arrives, 1 hour and 45 minutes after you ordered it, you hungrily bite into it and all you can taste is wet newspaper...and not just any newspaper, i'm talking last years edition of some high-school identity crisis project. Now you know what this movie is like. I love chris pine and his acting is always on point, so i waited for this movie to become available for 6 months at least, but this movie was hard to watch it was horrible. I mean acting was fine, i kinda feel like actors did exactly what they were told to do, and they did it well, but somehow this jagged piece of movie "performing" was not held well together by the story. I can see why directing wanted to be a bit quirky and all, but story was delivered in such a flat and unexiting way that i can't even describe it. Boring, pointless and silly (in a bad way).
Imawa no Kuni no Arisu (2020)
OMG, what absolute heap of trash! Do not watch if over 18!!
I want 20 hours of my life back!!!!!! I mean season 1 was half decent entertainment, but season two did nothing else but drag on and on and on and on....and on...and on, and kept trying to throw meaningful messages at the viewers but everything is so overacted and rediculous it's beyond comprehension. I've never watched such a horrible kids series tha just has nothing of value to offer. What a heap of trash this show is please do not waste time on this unless you are younger than 18 years old. Stay away from this sobbing teen emo drama with predictable plots and immature messaging. Stay away fols....
Gojira -1.0 (2023)
score: 8 minus 1
I never watched a godzilla movie before in my life, and don't really care for such monster movies as they are based on zero reality. However, this movie, to me anyway, was more about post-war japan and its effects on society it had.. and about family during such hardships. Acting is decent, effects are pretty good, but few major storyline flaws are hard to ignore. A monster that destroys buildings like houses of cards is unable to rip up a cable that drags him to the ocen floor? That is weak mate. Anyhow, I know that such details are not the most important thing in this type of movie, but it would be nice if directors nowadays cared about making their movies a bit more beliveable to today's viewrship.
LaRoy, Texas (2023)
slow, boring and below average in every way
I was really looking forward to this movie and waited 6 montsh to go and watch it, but all i got was a slow burning heap of trash that stank all the way to Jupiter. Do directors, or actors, or producers, fall in love with themselves or with their own work so that they lose all objectivity and ability to look at the finished probuct with a critical eye and say "hey, this is pretty bad, let's try and improve on it some more"?? I mean c'mon!! This movie has nothing to offer, nothing! I lasted 55 minutes, and I've been meaning to quit watching this after 20 minutes, before I just had to say enough is enough. This is one boring, sleepy, lazy movie that no one needs to see.
Fallout (2024)
shockingly amazing!!
Never heard of the Fallout video game in my life, not much of a gamer, but i love Walton's work and have been following his cereer so I decided to give this a go. With having no expectations or preconceived notions about what this should be like or what stpryline this whould fallow, this show is absolutely the best piece of TV entertainment I've seen in my life. I mean, acting was excellent by almost everyone, photograpy, CGI...everything was amazing. SOme of the reviewrs comment on editing, or directing, I have no such evaluation skills, but lemme telll you, this show is well worth your time....binge it!
Sugar (2024)
Noir mystery..but I am the victim!
BOOOOOORING!!!! I barely managed thru episode 3 and am at the moment struggling thru episode 4. Writing this while I watch is the actual puding (where the proof is, get it?). Anyhow, my interest is fading fast. My biggest issue at the moment is not how to talk this show down and convince you not to waste time, because I know you will give it a try, and perhaps you should, but how to come up with 400 more characters i need to write in order to get this posted. I still don't understand why our reviews have to be so "substantial" when nobody reads thru them to the end enyway? I wish they'd let us post video reviews, something like tik-tok :) wouldnt that be crazy, eh? Anyhoo, this tv series is super boring. Each epsiode should be no more than 10 minutes long. Quick update while I watch episode 5: this is absolute trash!
Damaged (2024)
total trash with few celeb actors trying to give it merit
Before, we used to have TV movies that watered down the quality of the movie offerings to the general public, but now we have all these online subscriber TV channels that fight to fill their slots with "quality" movies and this kind of trash is what we get. I mean I get it: you're trying to produce as many films as you can, but you have budget limitations. So, in essence, here is how it works: there is an abundance of scripts out there so you pick a 1/2 decent one for a few coin, you sign up a few big names for their name apeal but do not demand a lot of on-screen time for them so they can come cheap. So, you pick up 1 or 2 name actors, shoot their scenes over the weekend, and fill the rest of the movie with neatly arranged garbage and viola, you have a Netflix movie recipe for us two waste time on. Thank god I was ironing my laundry while watching this trash otherwise 2 hours would have been totally wasted. Avoid this guys, its just not good.
3 Body Problem (2024)
super smart people doing super stupid stuff
I lasted thro 2 1/2 episoed before turning this jibberish off. I'm ok with sci-fi stuff and other-worldy mumbo-jumbo, but when the plot requires super smart people to do super stupid things like allowing themself to get dragged into a video game, but they are playing because "it seems fun and interesting" without understanding how harmful it can be to them or what it does or where it comes from or how it works but taking huge risks with ther head is ok to them and a no-brainer, and all of this in order for the show to play out at all, that i have a problem with. Oh, and by the way, all the super smart poeple are young and sexy, well except one perhaps, and it becomes obvious who this is targeted to. Acting is half-baked, while the whole premise is on shaky legs. It's wonderfully intertwined and all, but when a show that wants to be super clever is based on a not so clever premise, as i said at the begining, then i'm done.
Sleeping Dogs (2024)
avarage at best, music tries hard to elevate the scenes but fails hard
Half way thru the movie killer is more than obvious, but that is not the problem. Music in the movie tries so hard to make boring and pointless scenes feel more dramatic and gives them extra length that just should not be there. The whole plot and characters could easily fit in a 25 minute short film, but stretching this below avarage flick to almost 2 hours should be criminally prosecuted. Took me 2 days to watch this movie it was so "captivating". Don't waste time on this flick, nothing new to see here, just your avarage "oh, I forgot" whodoneit that could have been much better. Over and out.
The Gentlemen (2024)
Lock, stock& 2 s.b. meets Snatch = Guy does what GUy does best
I love Guy Ritchie's UK underworld character depictions and quick & quirky dialogues, all mixed up with a bunch of strange and odd situations with weird stuff going on, drugs, violence, comedy with a cockney accent and an intangled plot. So, thats all typical Guy Ritchie stuff and one should not expect him deviating from what he does best. It's not everyone's cuppa, I hear you on that one, but for those who understand an artist's need for fingerprint impressions on his work, will know what to expect. So, you will enjoy it if you like abovementioned dyniamics in a TV series or a movie, but if you don't.....
Professor T (2021)
consistent performances, quality entertainment
Been waiting for a whole year (or more) till season 3 dropped and just ended up binging on it. It's what one could expect: an equally great continuation of a great show. In terms of whodoneits and general plots, yeah, i guess it's on par with what great shows usually deliver, but the added layer delivered by MIller and his mom are what I love the most. Story within a story within a story is what you can expect, so no, twists and turns were not unexpected. A lot will be made clearer, oh my dear viewer, by the end of season 3, but a lot will remain to be unwrapped in season 4. I hate leaftovers like that but one has to accept them, no choice in the matter. Fun is to be had watching the latest episodes and I envy you, my dear review reader, for having not seen season 3 yet.
Fake or Fortune? (2010)
Addictive and arguably the most compeling, mysterious and educational show EVER
Never ever, ever have I seen a show includes mystery, hystory, great naration, education, science and personal drama in such fantastic way! Crime, mystery and detective stories is what I love watching the most, but that hardly compares to this real-life dramas unwrapping in front of us and in the world of art and all of it with intrigue, science and excellent story telling. Alos, I can almost sense the tension between the two leads (art dealer and the art reporter), which kinda makes things funny a bit :) . I don't think that was intentional by the production house, but no love lost between them is palpable :). Anyhow, I highly recommend watching a few of the episodes for some art and hystory education, but trust me, you will get hooked.
Ricky Stanicky (2024)
quite a few good laughs
This is a comedy folks, not a science project so yes, it does have flaws. However, sum of all things in this movie is a fun time spent with a few rediculously funny moments. Cena did what Cena does, and Zac tries to be the serious one. It works for the most part and yes, there are a few dull moments...but weather thru those and you'll see that the flick is not that bad. If you re expecting the funniest flick of all times this isn't it. But a feel good story, with a few absolutely cracking moments can be found here. I did anyway. I have a fe more characters to write so I'll stretch this a bit. Done.
Land of Bad (2024)
absolute surprise of the century! well worth the watch
Took me by surprise how good this movie is. Not a huge fan of war stuff and all that rambo mambo-jumbo (see what i did there?), but this movie absolutely amazed me! I mean action was so real it blew me away. Dialogue was pure, nothing to heavy or overly dramatic, but action was intense, dramatic...and i could feel myself edging closer to the edge of my chair all the time. Well worth a watch and a total surprise! If you are a war action flick fan, this one you will love. Anyhow, i got few more characters left to write to post this. Now i think i am done...well almost, getting closer---and done!
Red Right Hand (2024)
very predictable and super boring
Had to watch golf on youtube while i watched this flick in order to keep myself entertained. Story development is soo, ho so predictable, it is insulting. Who wrote this? Some 12 year old who is not yet aware that there are thousands of movies with almost exact same plot? Can they not bring a bunch of semi-inteligent folk to sit at a table, maul over the script and say how worn out this storyline is before they go into production? I just feel like we are being let down buy some of the big name actors like Orlando who for some reason (money, obviously) decide to allow themselves to get involved with such high-school projects. Just a disgrace.
The Book of Clarence (2023)
It's a movie for chrissake! Oscar worthy performances here
If you are looking for bible accuracies etc.., go read the bible, this is a movie mate!! I see some harsh reviews here and not sure what they are all about. Did you forget that this is a movie? A piece of entertainment? An artistic impression and someone else's story? Anjoy it for chrissakes, pun intended (I liked that one so much I said it twice). This movie has some quirky humor, some great messaging and sure as heck some great acting. Cla'ance deserves an Oscar for this one, if you ask me. Well made movie, swith some fun and different elements to it, exceptional acting. Well worth your time.