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Hey_Sweden
Birthdate: September 25
I bid you...velcome.
I'm a shameless movie fanatic who especially favours the following genres:
Exploitation
Horror
Action
Comedy
Favourite directors include:
John Carpenter
Larry Cohen
George A. Romero
David Cronenberg
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Lists
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The movies I've enjoyed the most over the years.
Foreign Horror I love
My favourite directors.
Under rated '80s horror gems
Character actors I'm particularly fond of...
Recommended Slashers
Reviews
The Egg and I (1947)
"Why, I could write a book."
Fred MacMurray is a delight as a war veteran who decides to chuck his current job for life as a chicken farmer. He's very dedicated to this idea, and his loving wife (Claudette Colbert) is ready to be supportive of this lifestyle change. She DOES get off to a rough start, but soon the two of them are thoroughly adjusting to life on the farm, and all of its details.
"The Egg and I" is a very entertaining comedy, with a lot of hilarious slapstick in its first half. It does turn more serious in the second half, as a fire threatens to destroy everything that Bob & Betty have worked for, and SHE has to worry about having him possibly stolen from her by a pretty neighbor (Louise Allbritton) who also runs a farm.
Fred & Claudette are completely endearing as this couple going through these wacky misadventures. In fact, his unbridled enthusiasm for his new life is pretty infectious. Thanks to them, we get totally invested in the couples' story and are rooting for them every step of the way.
All of that said, the true enduring quality of this hit comedy is due to the scene-stealing performances by supporting players Marjorie Main and Percy Kilbride, who were such a hit as riotous farmers the Kettles (complete with a brood of 15 kids!) that they ended up *headlining* their own nine-film series (although there *were* two entries without Kilbride).
A strong supporting cast (also including Richard Long, Billy House, Donald MacBride, Samuel S. Hinds, Esther Dale, Elisabeth Risdon, and Fuzzy Knight) helps to make all of this go down very easily. The extremely alluring Allbritton is particularly pleasant to watch.
Based on a book by Betty MacDonald, the inspiration for Claudettes' character, "The Egg and I" is both very appealing and very, very funny, and would be good viewing for a family audience.
Eight out of 10.
Nemesis 2: Nebula (1995)
Derivative, but passable.
It's 73 years after Alex, the Olivier Gruner character, failed to prevent the Cyborgs from taking over, and now the future is a desolate ruin. But human scientists develop a super-human infant. The baby & her mother escape back to civil war-torn 1980 East Africa, where the kid grows up to be an extremely athletic member of a tribe, and is played by bodybuilder Sue Price. Then the girl is hunted by a Cyborg bounty hunter named "Nebula" (played by future "John Wick" series director Chad Stahelski).
Written & directed by Albert Pyun, who helmed the first film, this along with the next two sequels is intended to tell one very long story. The movie is overall fairly decent, essentially amounting to a chase story in which Nebula acts very similar to the Predator. Pyun does indeed borrow from other movies such as "Predator" and "Terminator 2" to spin this yarn.
It's paced fairly well, has some good action in it, has a non-stop supply of expendable baddies, is violent without being that gory, and has some amusing visuals. (It does work better when we can't see Nebula clearly, when it does become clearly visible, it looks awfully cheesy.) Much of the acting, like the movie itself, is passable; Price certainly has the musculature to make for a decent action hero even if she is predictably not much of an actress.
Overall, this is nothing great, but people looking for a cheap & cheesy sci-fi action movie for the evening COULD do worse.
Five out of 10.
Spider-Man: Menace from the Bottom of the World (1968)
"I feel like someone in Jules Verne."
'Menace from the Bottom of the World' is a truly goofy outing for Spidey, as the web-head learns that banks are mysteriously "disappearing". And it's true, they're being sucked right down into the Earths' core. Spidey investigates - after hassling some of the local wildlife - and finds a society of subterranean creatures determined to take back riches which they feel were stolen from them by the "surface people".
Here's where the utterly daft era of Spider-Mans' initial TV adventures begins. The first four episodes of this second season were at least rooted in *some* sort of reality. Here, that's all gleefully tossed out the window as Spidey must save himself from either being snacked on or otherwise killed by a variety of monsters.
And the Mole-Men are very damn funny as well, as they completely bungle their attempts to seize Spidey. He is able to make one of them run headlong into a pole when he deftly steps aside at the last moment.
Complete with an amusing revelation regarding the leader of the Mole-Men, this episode proves to be utterly engaging nonsense. The best aspect *has* to be the excellent soundtrack, in particular the track "Discothik" that plays out around the nine-minute mark. That organ!
Seven out of 10.
For Your Eyes Only (1981)
A good "back to basics" entry in the series.
British super-agent James Bond (Roger Moore, in excellent form as always) must retrieve a valuable ATAC transmitter that would be extremely beneficial to foreign powers. While on his mission, he is sometimes reluctantly partnered with Melina Havelock (Carole Bouquet), a young woman wanting revenge for the death of her father.
After a series of Bond outings that had become increasingly silly & outlandish, the makers of this entry, led by debuting 1st unit director John Glen, opted for a "minimalist" approach. The result is not one of the best Bonds, in my humble opinion, but is a respectable attempt to keep the plot & the action grounded in some form of reality.
One of the mostly hotly debated entries of the series - even among loyal Bond fans - "For Your Eyes Only" *does* have the expected array of appealing exotic settings (being partly set in Greece) and expertly executed action scenes, whether set underwater, in the air, or on ski slopes.
Bouquet is a *gorgeous* woman, albeit not much of an actress, but does possess an alluring presence worthy of a Bond girl. Strong support is provided by Julian Glover, Topol, Jill Bennett, Michael Gothard, Jack Hedley, James Villiers, Geoffrey Keen, and Walter Gotell. The scenes with Desmond "Q" Llewelyn and Lois "Miss Moneypenny" Maxwell are great fun as usual. The intoxicating Cassandra Harris, late wife of future Bond Pierce Brosnan, plays Countess Lisl, and Charles Dance made his feature debut as one of the henchmen. I definitely could have done without the annoying figure skater character (Lynn-Holly Johnson), however.
"For Your Eyes Only" is a well-designed, well-shot, and sometimes genuinely rousing Bond adventure, with Bonds' scaling of a cliff wall a major highlight. It does have the sense of humor common to a lot of the Moore Bonds, complete with an utterly daffy ending people have to see to believe.
Overall, it's a good time for this fan of the series.
Seven out of 10.
Thelma & Louise (1991)
"You get what you settle for."
The memorable "Thelma & Louise" is a potent and interesting road movie in which the title gal pals (Oscar nominees Susan Sarandon & Geena Davis) intend to have a vacation of their own without any guys present. But a fateful incident at a honkytonk establishment turns them into fugitives from the law, and Thelma & Louise have to make some critical decisions as to their course of action.
Fueled by a powerful and pointed screenplay by Oscar winner Callie Khouri, "Thelma & Louise" is stirring entertainment in which it was always easy (for me, at least) to be on our protagonists' side. Although not necessarily an "anti-male" story, there aren't many genuinely good men in this story. Most of them are seriously flawed in one way or another. So it's understandable that the gals operate out of a sense of mistrust. And when they're forced to escalate their crimes - including armed robbery - it makes sense since they haven't had much *choice* in the matter.
Directed with compassion and his typical style by Ridley Scott, this is extremely well shot in widescreen by Adrian Biddle, who takes full advantage of the expanse of the rural vistas. Hans Zimmers' score is one of his better ones, and the supporting cast reads like a who's who of talent: Harvey Keitel, Michael Madsen (bringing some nuance to his role of Louises' boyfriend), Christopher McDonald, Stephen Tobolowsky, Timothy Carhart, Lucinda Jenney, Jason Beghe, Marco St. John. The two leads are predictably wonderful, with Brad Pitt as the true breakout star of the production. He leaves quite the impression as the genial, studly outlaw who schools Thelma in the fine art of "gentlemanly" armed robbery.
The film is involving from start to finish, and doesn't feel overlong even at two hours and 10 minutes; the ending is both downbeat & triumphant at once, insuring that "Thelma & Louise" has remained in the public consciousness for over 30 years now. The lead performances and Khouris' perspective have given it an edge over other, similar "crooks on the lam" road pictures of the past.
Eight out of 10.
Sh! The Octopus (1937)
It's weird, it's wacky, it's wonder-fool.
Bumbling police detectives Kelly (Hugh Herbert, "Goodbye Again") and Dempsey (Allen Jenkins, "Destry Rides Again") get trapped inside a "haunted" lighthouse with assorted other characters. They are subsequently menaced by a criminal mastermind dubbed "The Octopus" as well as an actual cephalopod.
A true odd duck of a B movie, "Sh! The Octopus" is primarily a comedy, but is also a mystery with elements of horror as well. It attempts to go far on the wacky hijinks of Kelly & Dempsey, and, although some viewers may find it much too silly, it *does* deliver some real laughs - as well as decent atmosphere.
It also has a hilariously phony-looking octopus with which Kelly tussles underwater, and a very impressive transformation effect once the human villain is revealed. (This technique was also used in the 1931 version of "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde".)
The cast does a good job, with George Rosener ("The Secret of Treasure Island") stealing the show as a stereotypical crusty old sea dog. Herbert & Jenkins are an amusing if not exceptional comedy team who do have some good moments together.
A decent little diversion obviously derived from the stage, with a priceless ending. My favorite aspect was the fact that only some of the characters are who they say they are!
Five out of 10.
The Assassination Bureau (1969)
Life is a precious thing.
Diana Rigg plays Sonya Winter, a journalist with an agenda in the early 20th century who contacts the title murder-for-hire organization, wanting someone dead. The young boss (Oliver Reed) is initially aghast when she reveals that it is HE whom she wants dead, but his shock turns to intrigue when he realizes that a good cat-and-mouse game between him and his associates could be good for weeding out the incompetents. Then he learns that some of his associates are interested in politically motivated crimes.
Designed, produced, and scripted by Michael Relph, based on an idea in a novel began by Jack London and finished by Robert L. Fish, "The Assassination Bureau" is an agreeably daft time waster. It has a great, classic sense of farce for a while, and is quite lively and humorous at first. Only in the second half does it lose some momentum and get more bogged down in plot.
But this has such an engaging, eclectic international cast that it ends up as a very watchable bit of nonsense. It's a treat to see Reed give such a *fun* performance, and Rigg is his match as the feisty woman who's gotten in over her head. Also making appearances are Telly Savalas, Curd Jurgens, Philippe Noiret, Warren Mitchell, Beryl Reid, Clive Revill, Vernon Dobtcheff, Annabella Incontrera, Kenneth Griffith, Jess Conrad, and George Coulouris.
This *does* have a gleefully unpredictable quality, with Reeds' swashbuckling protagonist often unflappable in the face of danger.
"The Assassination Bureau" might be too silly for some folks, but I had a pretty good time with it. Yes, it's lightweight and forgettable in the end, and goes on a bit long, but is overall a genially tongue-in-cheek affair, and must viewing for fans of Rigg & Reed.
Seven out of 10.
Ernest Scared Stupid (1991)
The spooky season, done Ernest style.
"How about a bumper sandwich, booger lips?"
Madcap comedy hick Ernest P. Worrell (the late, great Jim Varney, in typically fine form) is a sanitation engineer in the small town of Briarwood. In his attempts to help his kid pals build a super-duper treehouse, he chooses exactly the wrong tree. In so doing, he manages to resurrect a dastardly troll (Jonas Moscartolo) from its Earthly tomb. Despite his lack of smarts, he must help to save the day when the town ends up inundated by the troll and HIS pals.
Although many adults may assert that the character of Ernest is very much an acquired taste, his films are usually a pretty safe bet for a younger audience. There is a certain harmless, if utterly goofy & silly, charm about them. Certainly Varney was a real talent, and here he gets a chance to portray different characters in a rapid-fire manner.
While "Ernest Scared Stupid" might be a little too spooky for the youngest of viewers (those creature effects by the Chiodo brothers are amusingly gross & imaginative), some family members are sure to have a good time. Director John Cherry, an old hand at the Ernest movies by this point, keeps it all pretty lively and moving along well to its chaotic conclusion. The child actors are appealing, and for adults of a certain age there is the added attraction of special guest star Eartha Kitt playing aged witch Old Lady Hackmore.
Perhaps the brightest bit is the opening credits sequence, with Ernest reacting to clips of various black & white horror movies, ranging from cheese such as "The Brain from Planet Arous" to a true classic in the form of the original "Nosferatu".
Six out of 10.
Bride of Re-Animator (1990)
"My God. They're using tools."
Drs. Herbert West (Jeffrey Combs) and Dan Cain (Bruce Abbott) are back doing what they do best, after having survived the massacre in the first "Re-Animator". They finish a stint as volunteer medics in a civil war in Peru, whereupon they end up as doctors back at Miskatonic Hospital.
Spending a fair amount of their time splicing together various bloody body parts (the crawling eyeball is a highlight), their ultimate goal here is of course Wests' brainstorm: creating "life" by creating a "bride" that will house the heart of Dans' deceased girlfriend Meg.
Although understandably not as "fresh" as the first film, director Brian Yuzna (who'd produced and "presented" "Re-Animator"), this is a game attempt to keep its spirit alive. "Bride" is a lively, often very funny horror-comedy with an enjoyable farcical sense: situations will frequently go from bad to worse to untenable during Herberts' and Dans' misadventures. The makeup effects & gore are just as outrageous and nasty as one could want. (Seeing the unrated version of this would be advised.)
Combs is once again hilarious as the pompous, demented instigator, while Abbott continues his fine work as the "straight man" to his partners' antics. (Dan may often take exception to Herberts' ideas, but in the end he always goes along anyway.)
David Gale also reprises his role as the "living" severed head of Dr. Carl Hill (and he's as priceless as before), while new cast members include Claude Earl Jones as a tough-guy police lieutenant with a personal connection to the case, Fabiana Udenio as Dans' new love interest, Mel Stewart as a pathologist who does some fateful "fiddling around" with the "Re-Agent", and Kathleen Kinmont as a terminally ill girl who will eventually become part of the Bride.
This flamboyant, sadistic sort-of homage to "Bride of Frankenstein" may not be in the same league as its predecessor, but it's still a pretty good sequel just the same.
Seven out of 10.
The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
Here's to a new world of gods and monsters.
This justly famous sequel to the original horror classic begins in clever enough fashion, as author Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley (Elsa Lanchester) tells her husband Percy (Douglas Walton) and their friend Lord Byron (Gavin Gordon) that the stories of Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive) and The Monster (Boris Karloff) are not yet over, as she regales them with this fantastic tale of humor & horror blended.
Henry, who has survived and now looks back on his actions with regret, is approached by an even madder associate, Dr. Pretorious (Ernest Thesiger, just wonderful), who convinces Henry that a mate, or "bride", needs to be created for The Monster. Meanwhile, The Monster goes on a rampage during which he spends some time with a blind hermit (the endearing O. P. Heggie).
The delightful sequence with the blind man (later spoofed in "Young Frankenstein") and the final, lively creation sequence are the major highlights of a sequel that goes in a slightly different direction, opting for more of a camp feel. The result is a film that's absolutely hilarious at times. This admittedly may not appeal to some horror fans, but for me it made the film a Hell of a lot of fun.
It's all acted to perfection, and director James Whale once again brings a real sense of style to the proceedings; he wasn't interested in doing a sequel unless he could do it on his own terms. Karloff is again great as the Monster gets humanized more (although this is more in keeping with his depiction in the novel), even learning to speak a variety of words. In the end, The Monster is a being wanting mainly food, comfort - and a friend. Lanchester does double duty, also playing the briefly seen Bride, and one might wish that the film were just a bit longer so we could see more of her. Una O'Connor again does her particular brand of scenery chewing, and a young John Carradine can also be seen briefly as one of the hunters that shows up at the hermits' hut.
One of the most entertaining sequels ever made, this even goes so far as to surpass its predecessor.
Nine out of 10.
The Masque of the Red Death (1964)
Look into this face and SHUDDER!
Vincent Price is at his most deliciously diabolical as the debauched Prince Prospero, ruler of a European land ravaged by the plague known as the Red Death. His castle is used by his associates as a refuge from the plague, and it is there that he brings an earnest peasant girl, Francesca (a very appealing Jane Asher). What Prospero doesn't realize is that his reckoning may well be at hand, when a mysterious figure in red attends his masquerade ball.
Scripted by Charles Beaumont and R. Wright Campbell from the Edgar Allan Poe story (with another Poe tale, Hop Frog, worked in as a subplot), this is far and away one of the best things that filmmaker Roger Corman ever did. It's certainly a highlight of his Poe series, and it also serves as one of Prices' best vehicles.
One can quickly see that this film (extremely well shot in England by Nicolas Roeg) benefited from a bigger budget and longer shooting schedule than was the norm for a Corman film. It's a wonderfully lavish production with incredible sets & costumes and an effectively macabre touch. The atmosphere is just great.
With a top supporting cast that also includes Hazel Court, David Weston, Nigel Green, Patrick Magee, Robert Brown, Julian Burton, Skip Martin, and Verina Greenlaw, a provocative script in which Prosperos' faith (he's a Satan worshiper) tested against that of Francesca, and a booming score composed by David Lee, this is an excellent period horror film that stands up quite well 60 years later.
Nine out of 10.
Prowl (2010)
Not terrible, but you've seen it all before.
Courtney Hope ('The Young and the Restless') stars as Amber, who is desperate to leave her dead-end small town behind and settle in Chicago, where there is an apartment that she's coveting. Her friends tag along for the journey, but they make the *fatal*, *classic* horror film error of hitching a ride with a stranger - in this case, a long-haul trucker named Bernard (Bruce Payne, "Passenger 57"). Her & her dumb friends will soon become prey for sub-human, ravenous beasts, who are all being "cared for" by mysterious Veronica (Saxon Trainor, "Skeeter").
"Prowl" is pretty much a standard modern body-count horror flick, complete with the kind of thinly written, stereotypical young folk that we see so often in horror stories of this kind. There are precious few brains among them, even if they *do* take some precautions while going on this ride. Therefore, you don't take any real pity on them. All of the action & CGI effects are the kind of sped-up, cartoonish nonsense that I've seen countless times before.
That said, I did appreciate the lead performance by the appealing Ms. Hope, as well as the "motherly" feel that Veronica has for these somewhat vampire-like creatures. There was some decent humor at the outset, and some of the performances are better than one might expect. But this is still average stuff where people who skip it aren't missing much.
Five out of 10.
Maria Marten, or The Murder in the Red Barn (1935)
He was truly a Tod among men.
Stage actor Tod Slaughter brings his customary flair to this starring film debut, which begat a series of cult classics that showcased the wonderfully hammy actor to great effect. Here, he plays the utterly dastardly Squire William Corder, who has been carrying on with young maiden Maria Marten (Sophie Stewart). When she reveals that she's pregnant, he decides to cover his tracks by murdering her! But Carlos (Eric Portman), the very English gypsy who dotes on Maria, suspects what a cad his rival really is.
Although obviously shot on a very low budget, "Murder in the Red Barn" is great fun for anybody who loves this sort of trashy Gothic melodrama. Director Milton Rosmer shows a fair bit of style, and the film has a solid pace (clocking in at *less* than an hour long), plenty of amusements, and some excellent atmosphere. The supporting cast (also including Dennis Hoey as the gambler to whom Corder will end up owing 6,000 pounds) brings plenty of their own gravitas, but Slaughter is the guy whom you'll remember the most. He truly appeared to be having great fun himself playing these rather over-the-top characters.
If you enjoy this one, be sure to check out other TS classics such as "The Face at the Window", "Crimes at the Dark House", and his most famous, "Sweeney Todd, The Demon Barber of Fleet Street".
Seven out of 10.
Sanctum (2011)
Flawed in some ways, but delivers on a visceral level.
A gung-ho group of "cave divers" take it upon themselves to explore the largest, least accessible underwater caves in the world, located in Papua New Guinea. Frank (Richard Roxburgh, "Van Helsing"), is the leader of the group, and is a man with a true "it's my way or the highway" attitude. The lot of them are stranded in the caves when a cyclone causes the caves to be flooded.
Although burdened by cliched dialogue & character relationships (Frank is at odds with his son, played by Rhys Wakefield of "The Purge"), the film works pretty well once it kicks into gear. It's essentially a 21st century "disaster movie", and is made with skill; it is always putting its characters in peril and forcing them to try to think of how to survive. The one thing they know is that, as soon as they give up, they're DEAD. The action scenes & thrills really are first-rate.
Granted, I did get tired of some of these cliches. Wouldn't you know it: the billionaire backer of the expedition (Ioan Gruffudd of "Fantastic Four") turns out to be a self-serving weasel, and dumb character decisions (especially from Alice Parkinson ("X-Men Origins: Wolverine")) are too frequent. It's a good thing that the film is still able to reel in the viewer with its almost non-stop state of excitement.
"Sanctum" is worth a look for fans of water-logged thrillers. It does bear the mark of James Cameron, who was the "presenter" and one of the executive producers.
Seven out of 10.
The Unknown Terror (1957)
Amusing nonsense from a bunch of "fun guys".
Explorer Jim Wheatley (Charles H. Gray, "Prophecy") dies about a minute into this story, prompting a search for him by his millionaire brother-in-law, Dan Matthews (John Howard, "The Invisible Woman"), who brings along his wife Gina (Mala Powers, Roxane in the 1950 "Cyrano de Bergerac"). Experienced spelunker Pete Morgan (Paul Richards, "Beneath the Planet of the Apes") aims to help out, sincerely wanting to be of assistance as well as aiming to prove that he's still got what it takes. (He's now crippled after saving Dans' life in a previous expedition.)
While undeniably a typically cheesy B level genre production from this period, this is still a reasonably entertaining example of "cave horror", complete with a plot about rapidly growing, killer fungus. It may not measure up to, say, the more recent "The Descent", but it offers a fair amount of amusement. Granted, you'll know who the villain is soon after he makes his first appearance. But it's all part & parcel of a generally agreeable bit of dopey escapism, with killer *soap suds* standing in for the fungus.
With Powers and the equally gorgeous May Wynn ("The Caine Mutiny") as scenery attractions, and a supporting cast also including Gerald Milton ("The Naked Kiss"), Duane Grey ("Charro!"), and Richard Gilden ("The Black Klansman"), this is easy enough to watch, but just as easy to forget.
This was one of the two horror features directed by Charles Marquis Warren, mainly known for his work in the Western genre (including creating the TV series 'Rawhide' and 'Gunsmoke').
Five out of 10.
Mercy (2014)
Not great, but not bad at all either.
Based on the Stephen King short story "Gramma", this feature-length adaptation / expansion deals with a rural mother & her sons who must take care of Grandma Mercy (veteran actress Shirley Knight) after she has what appears to be a stroke. But Mercy's young grandson George (Chandler Riggs of 'The Walking Dead') comes to learn that the old lady is not the wise, benevolent, kindly person *he* always knew, and that she'd had dealings with some dark entity, in order to get what she wanted out of life.
My only real problem with this is that the set-up is so effective, and that the "payoff" comes off as overly familiar, and not particularly scary. It's even cliched to a degree, what with its revelations (such as that involving nice-guy local Jim (Dylan McDermott)). But, for me, the characters actually felt like real people, and I especially enjoyed the interplay between the two brothers (Joel Courtney plays sarcastic older brother Buddy, an aspiring chef).
The widescreen photography (by Byron Shah) of the picturesque California locations is first-rate. The cast also includes Frances O'Connor as the mom, Mark Duplass as the indolent uncle, and Amanda Walsh as Jims' wife Charlotte (a painter who is also a convenient expert of occult-related matters). Riggs does a good - if not exceptional - job as the young anchor of the tale. The visual effects are variable, but I did like the concept of the "weeping book", which is well realized here.
All in all, this IS in some ways a very standard modern-day spook show, but it's still competently handled and generally involving. Not up there with the best film versions of Kings' work, but far from the worst as well.
This marked the final acting appearance by veteran comedian Jack Carter, who plays Mr. Bello.
Seven out of 10.
Viy (1967)
A Cossack fears nothing!
Leonid Kuravlyov plays Khoma Brutus, a young seminarian / philosopher who is tasked with keeping a vigil over a beautiful young woman who has recently died, and saying prayers over her. These three nights that he must spend with her turn out to be extremely eventful, since she apparently is not really "dead".
"Viy" was based upon the same N. V. Gogol short novel as Mario Bavas' "Black Sunday", but while the Bava film had a wonderful nightmarish atmosphere, this Russian-made film has a much different feel to it. It's not the kind of thing that would much scare more jaded horror fans; in fact, I would actually describe it as more whimsical than the Bava film. It's more about the testing of this young mans' faith than anything else, and God knows, he really tries to put on a brave face while the young witch is always throwing him for a loop. The third & final night is the best, for it is here that the witch, and the filmmakers, truly pull out all the stops, with some wonderful imagery & practical effects.
"Viy" has some great atmosphere of its own, a very entertaining sense of humor, and some provocative dialogue. The performances are all right on the money, with Kuravlyov sincere, endearing, and charming as the put-upon protagonist. The music by Karen Khachaturyan is wonderful, as it perfectly helps to set the mood.
This is a fine example of what people have come to describe as "folk horror", and if you love "Black Sunday", I'd recommend seeing this film for an equally interesting take on the same source material.
Seven out of 10.
Modern Vampires (1998)
I admit, I found it highly amusing.
"Modern Vampires" is a very hip, and sometimes very funny, comedic spin on vampire stories, courtesy of the redoubtable team of director Richard Elfman and screenwriter Matthew Bright ("Forbidden Zone", "Shrunken Heads"). In modern day L. A., a particularly decadent clique of vampires tries to look out for wild child Nico (Natasha Gregson Wagner, "High Fidelity"), a newly minted vampire who risks exposing the city's blood suckers, led by Count Dracula himself (Robert Pastorelli, 'Murphy Brown').
The funniest bit has to do with a dopey Van Helsing (a typically hammy, and hilarious, Rod Steiger), who recruits young black man "Time Bomb" (Gabriel Casseus, "Black Hawk Down"), who *then* brings along his gang-banger friends. Talk about a culture clash! Scenes with Steiger and the boys are among the most ridiculous - and priceless - in the movie.
Elfman & company certainly had lots of fun giving this as eclectic a cast as possible: Casper Van Dien ("Starship Troopers"), Kim Cattrall ('Sex and the City'), Natasha Lyonne ('Orange is the New Black'), Craig Ferguson ("Saving Grace"), Udo Kier ("Flesh for Frankenstein"), Conchata Ferrell ('Two and a Half Men'), etc.
For me, it became clear very early on that this is a comedy more than anything. It's not out to scare *anybody*. But it shows that camp humor is alive and well, and I quite enjoyed it. However, it's also the kind of thing where I wouldn't blame others if they found it to be lame. This kind of goofy humor is not for everybody.
Seven out of 10.
The Black Phone (2021)
An intense thriller.
The setting is a small town in 1978, and the local children are in serious jeopardy from a serial abductor known only as The Grabber (Ethan Hawke). However, the Grabbers' latest intended victim, Finney (Mason Thames) turns out to be a fairly tough cookie who also receives encouragement and tips on how to survive from the spirits of previous victims. Finney also has a sister, Gwen (Madeleine McGraw) whose eerily prophetic dreams may be of further assistance to the clueless cops.
Based on a short story by Joe Hill, "The Black Phone" will be hard to watch for people, showing as it does the scenario of young children being victimized. (Finney & Gwens' father (Jeremy Davies) is already an untenable presence in their home, since he's an abusive drunk.) It's pleasing to note, however, that rarely does Finney just stop and give up. Even when things seem hopeless, he receives some spiritual motivation to get back up and dole out some punishment to the creep that captured him.
Director Scott Derrickson builds some effective tension, and the film is generally gripping if also tending towards cliches at times. The comedy relief with Max, the James Ransone character, likewise detracts from the effectiveness since these lame attempts at humor are "Last House on the Left"-style incongruous.
The cast is fine, with Hawke, who himself started out as a child actor, genuinely disconcerting as the monstrous villain. The kids are real finds, however, and could have good futures in the business.
Even if imperfect, this does build to a pretty satisfying climax, with our young protagonist realizing that he won't be able to rely on ANY adults in this thing.
Seven out of 10.
The Autopsy of Jane Doe (2016)
A cut above most modern horror fare.
Tommy (Brian Cox, 'Succession') and Austin (Emile Hirsch, "Into the Wild") are father-and-son coroners who have one very eventful, fateful night. The corpse of a young woman (Olwen Catherine Kelly, "Darkness on the Edge of Town") has been brought in, and her condition is mystifying. There are very few visible signs of trauma, but when they start opening her up, the two men find all sorts of problems with her.
This is quite simply a terrific modern horror film, shot through with a lot of excellent atmosphere - for about 55 minutes. We get completely caught up in the coroners' predicament, and find this mystery compelling. Director Andre Ovredal ("The Last Voyage of the Demeter") builds up a superb feeling of gloom. It's only in the final half hour when the writers (Ian Goldberg & Richard Naing) insist on providing some sort of answer - or letting the two main characters *think* they have the answer - and the film starts getting more routine. Familiar horror tropes get trotted out, and the result is just not that satisfying.
Still - it's refreshing to watch a horror film that delivers true horror for the most part. Granted, anybody turned off by the prospect of a feature-length autopsy, and the attendant gruesomeness, would be advised to look elsewhere.
Cox & Hirsch are engaging & sympathetic in the leads, two basically normal, decent guys who get put through pure Hell mainly because they're there. They help to keep the film, even through its weak resolution. Kelly is a real trouper in the most difficult role, managing to retain an enigma and creepiness without the benefit of any dialogue or expression.
This is the kind of film that I'd rate as a solid effort, even if it doesn't altogether work.
Seven out of 10.
Kyûketsu dokuro-sen (1968)
Superior Japanese horror.
With similarities to John Carpenters' "The Fog", as well as other haunted ship films such as "Death Ship", "The Living Skeleton" relates a tale of passengers of an ocean liner massacred by modern-day pirates. Three years later, those pirates are attempting to live "normal" lives, but they will NOT be safe from the vengeance of their victims - in particular, bride-to-be Yoriko (Kikko Matsuoka) and her identical twin sister Saeko (also played by Matsuoka).
A thoroughly entertaining story that takes some great turns, "The Living Skeleton" has some very potent atmosphere, and a plot bursting with feelings of doom and gloom. The performances are excellent, the black & white widescreen photography (by Masayuki Kato) is impressive, the music (by Noboru Nishiyama) haunting - at times it's reminiscent of spaghetti Western music - and there is some juicy gore as well. (There are some effectively NASTY deaths in this one.)
Laying aside the image of the chained-together skeletons hanging in the ocean depths (it's not as spooky as I would have liked it to be), "The Living Skeleton" is one of the best horror films that I've seen lately. And it has a strong emotional component to go with the chills. All in all, it's well worth a look.
Eight out of 10.
Zombie Island Massacre (1984)
An underwhelming body count flick.
A group of dolts on a tour of a Caribbean island begin to be stalked & slaughtered by some mysterious person or entity. Only once the group makes it to a secluded estate do they start taking any sort of proactive steps against their assailant.
As others before me have said, actual "zombies" are few & far between in this admittedly exotic horror outing. (The word zombie was added to the title to presumably make it more enticing.) Mostly, what gives this 80s entry into the slasher sweepstakes any stature is the fact that it makes FULL use of then-notorious Rita Jenrette (who plays Sandy). She was a congressmans' wife who capitalized on her 15 minutes of fame by posing for Playboy and then appearing in this cheap & sleazy schlock movie. (If you do love movies like this for the sex appeal, you can take some satisfaction in the bare flesh quotient, with Ms. Jenrette doing a gratuitous shower scene in the opening minutes.)
Overall, the movie is on the boring side, although it *does* have a unique get-up for the killer, doles out a bit of gore, and features a VERY familiar-sounding score by "Friday the 13th" series composer Harry Manfredini. The cast isn't altogether bad, if also on the nondescript side. David Broadnax, who plays no-nonsense tough guy photographer Paul, was also the "presenter", a producer, and the story author, and gives one of the better performances.
If you're an 80s slasher junkie, you *will* find some things to enjoy here, with the director / editor (John N. Carter) bringing some atmosphere to the proceedings.
Four out of 10.
Curucu, Beast of the Amazon (1956)
Universal International kind of strikes out with this one.
This silly B genre effort takes place in Brazil, where local plantation workers are panicking and heading for the hills, due to fears of a dopey-looking bird-like monster of legend. "Rock Dean" (John Bromfield, "Revenge of the Creature"), son of a landowner, ventures out into the heart of the Amazon to hopefully find & slay this beast, in order to bring the workers back. Tagging along is a determined lady doctor, Andrea Romar (the lovely 50s scream queen Beverly Garland, "Not of This Earth"), who wants to make medical use of ingredients used by jungle "headhunters".
A rather notorious disappointment for "monster kids" of the 50s, this is worth seeing at least once for its excellent location shooting, and atmosphere. Writer-director Curt Siodmak ("The Wolf Man", "I Walked with a Zombie", "Donovan's Brain", etc.) tries to use his "big twist" (which people will undoubtedly see coming ahead of time) to make a bigger statement about exploitation of the natives, but there's not really that much going on here. He also treats his leading lady in a typical fashion, making her be reasonably intelligent & stubborn, but also having her scream a lot and eventually be carried away by the monster.
The performances are adequate to the occasion. Bromfield is the kind of cool, tough customer who puffs on a cigarette during a physical exam (!), while Garland is a delight as always. Argentinian-born Tom Payne ("Love Slaves of the Amazons") is good in support, as the character "Tupanico". Lush cinematography (by Rudolf Icsey) and nice music (by Raoul Kraushaar) are definite assets.
The uninitiated may still want to give this one a look. It does seem that Siodmak was rather goofing on the whole monster movie formula, anyway. It *does* work as a bit of a fore-runner to the Italian jungle / cannibal film boom of the 70s and beyond.
Five out of 10.
Konchû daisensô (1968)
Once again, Earths' creepy-crawlies get their revenge.
In this sometimes laughable but well-intentioned apocalyptic drama from Japan, the insects of the planet are out to get us once again. They're not giant this time, but they're every bit as dangerous. At the same time, a missing H-bomb (from a bomber that was downed by an insect swarm) is being highly coveted by spies. A courageous doctor (Keisuke Sonoi) teams up with a young bug collector (Yusuke Kawazu) who's been accused of the killings of a few American pilots.
It turns out that the flying menaces are not acting of their own accord, but after the result of some human meddling. Although the film can get cheesy at times (it *was* mocked on MST3K), it *does* feature serious themes, being a condemnation of warlike attitudes and a tale of the sad after-effects of the events of WWII. It's also a story in which characters can potentially come to ruin simply because they don't *talk* with each other.
It often features visual effects that can get pretty tacky, but there's enough footage of real insects - especially repeated shots of them biting into flesh - to make viewers with an aversion to insects utterly repulsed. It also has a memorably psychedelic touch in that victims of the insect bites will hallucinate before eventually succumbing to the poison. (The doctors' hallucination late in the film is a stylistic highlight.)
Sincerely acted, with a very appropriate finish, "Genocide" is not on the level of other Japanese genre product of the 50s and 60s, but it has enough good qualities for one to not just write it off.
Six out of 10.
The Devil Inside (2012)
Every single one of us, the Devil inside.
Masquerading as a documentary, this so-so horror flick shows what happens as a young woman, Isabella Rossi (Fernanda Andrade), probes the mystery of her mother. 20 years ago, her mother Maria (Suzan Crowley) had killed two priests & a nun in what was apparently a botched exorcism. Now, events are about to repeat themselves as Isabella hooks up with two rogue priests who take the idea of exorcism quite seriously.
If we awarded high marks for good intentions, this would rate higher for me, but, as it is, it's a very routine film with "shocks" and profane dialogue that amuse much more than they really shock or terrify. What worked so well in The Exorcist 51 years ago is now rather old hat.
Not that director / co-writer / co-editor William Brent Bell doesn't give this a decent effort. It's certainly more interesting in the early going, but once the familiar horror tropes start getting trotted out, it's just too easy to lose interest. The acting is competent enough, but the characters just aren't that compelling. I couldn't bring myself to really care about their ultimate fate.
The film isn't overly bad for a one-time viewing. It's just resolutely average.
Still, it must have struck a chord with other viewers: apparently, this was a VERY profitable film back in 2012, earning $101 million on a budget of about $1 million.
Five out of 10.