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Reviews
Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2024)
Bad Chemistry and lack of identity
Watching the show is like being the passenger in a car where most of the time the driver plods along driving like a 90 year old granny on their way to church who suddenly plants their foot hits the Nitros slamming you back in your seat only to moments later slam the brakes on smashing your face into the dash and go back to driving like a granny.
Series where 90% of the screen time is the just the two mains, live and die on the chemistry between the lead as there is no one else to carry the bag. And Donald Glover and. Maya Erskine have none. Both are good actors but that's it there is no spark.
The lack of chemistry is exacerbated by the pacing and scripting. Which are awful the show plod along with Glover and Erskine sleep walking through scenes with long moments of character staring pensively followed by exchanges delivered most of the time with all the energy of flat battery.
Then WHAM, POW, an action scene and these are the high light Glover and Erskine shine, they are well shot, well choregraphed and immense fun but sadly they are the exception not the rule.
This is meant to be a comedy is it funny, not really there are moments that raise a smirk or a little grin and one scene that even got a chuckle but most of the time it's like your unfunny uncle trying to tell a joke at a family party.
What you are left with is a show that is a plodding relationship drama, trying to be a romcom which is also trying to be an action spy comedy if it had picked any one of them it might of worked but this is just dull with moments of tonal whiplash.
Miss Fisher and the Crypt of Tears (2020)
Agatha Christie meets temple of doom
Mix an Agatha Christie. Manor house murder with a bit of supernatural shenanigans and just a dash of rollicking adventure and you have this movie.
The chemistry between Essie Davis and Nathan. Page is there and makes me wish for another season of the series this is a fun solid film.
But and if you saw this coming give yourself a screen writers credit. This movie is the jack of all trades but the master of none. The who done it falls by the way side for a race against time to advert super natural disaster plot and neither gets the time and focus they need.
This movie was made on an $8 million AUD Budget and the money is there on the screen wonderful costumes beautiful locations but it is also on the screen in the form of small cast some hit or miss CGI making up for what they couldn't shoot.
The second half of the story stalls the movie is only 101 minutes but could of lost 20 of those,
All complaints aside I still enjoyed it.
Da zhen shen huo sang (2019)
If you like Sherlock Holmes and Lupin you'll love this.
This movie is one part Robert Downy Jr's Sherlock Holmes, one part Wuxia silliness and one part Lupin which makes it a hell of a lot of fun.
The story moves along at a good pace and if you like detective stories you'll have fun with this. The film looks stunning with a wonderful mix of Art-deco and European with just a touch of pre war Shanghai. Prague is a wonderful stand in for the Golden city and is shot to look it's best with many old buildings and their interior giving a hint of elegance and class. The acting is top notch with Geng Han turning in a great performance as the titular detective with a great supporting cast.
I recommend giving this one a try its worth the effort.
Tu Mo: Wangzhe Zhengtu (2021)
You ever wondered what it would be like if Asylum made a Wuxia movie
A Spaniard, a Russian and a Hungarian walked into a movie sounds like the start of a joke but it is this movie with it's mix of Chinese and European actors. If you've ever wondered what it would be like if Asylum made a Wuxia movie then this is the movie for you. Paper thin plot (parts of which were ripped of Game of Thrones does this sound familiar disgraced warrior exiled for the rest of their lives to order of warriors Who protect against the undead ), barely developed characters, average to bad acting and dodgy CGI this movie has them all. With just a dash of 70's Shaw Brothers movie (bad dubbing (of the people speaking English for once) , only a couple of the actors are any good at stage fighting while the rest are barely capable and two dozen people meant to be an army of thousands).
The plot is fairly standard ancient evil defeated but not destroyed long ago and sealed away the key to which is the McGuffin of the story in this case a sword. A group of unlikely heroes come together to fight the bad guys minions and prevent his resurrection, with the standard damm your sudden but inevitable betrayal B story.
Now I'm a bit of a fan of the Asylum movies and bad movies in general but this one isn't interesting. It isn't a self aware parody like Sharknado or Kung Pow and its not bad enough to be good or good enough to be bad it is a paint by numbers bog standard movie whose only point of interest is the fact you have European actors playing heroes in a Wuxia movie. I'll give it a generous not unwatchable but forgettable.
Black Adam (2022)
This is a SUPERHERO Movie
For the first time in a long time I came out of Superhero movie feeling like I'd seen a superhero movie, solid action, nice SFX and a likeable cast, but most important no-one trying to shovel some agenda down my throat with all the subtly of a crotch punch from Black Adam.
Dwayne Johnson does a good job as Black Adam he relentless, driven and uncompromising and perhaps to willing to crush anyone who gets in his way. Pierce Brosnan is perfect as Dr Fate he is the wise councillor but time hangs heavy on him yet he still finds humour and little pleasures in life. Aldis Hodge as Hawkman is almost a mirror of Black Adam driven, uncompromising and unwilling to back down but unlike him unwilling to kill. Then we have the Newbies Cyclone and Atom Smasher played by Quintessa Swindell and Noah Centineo they are a little under cooked as characters we get a one line back story for them and their powers and no real time is spent fleshing them out she's smart and he's big, clumsy and not so bright but I do like the way they visually represent Cyclone's powers showing her almost dancing is the wind and for the most part Atom Smasher looks fine.
As for the unpowered heroes of this piece, oh I know shock horror non-superhero characters making real contribution will wonders never cease, Sarah Shahi's Adrianna Tomaz does get lumbered a with the being the info dump of the piece giving us all the what's and wherefores but she is also the middle man between Black Adam and the Justice Society but this is a woman who has lost her husband seen her country taken over by Intergang and wants a better life and is not above calling Hawkman and the Justice Society on their moral high ground BS. Mohammed Amer's Karim is the comedy relief but when the chips are down he steps up. Bodhi Sabongui Amon Tomaz he is the heart of the movie the superhero fan boy who gets a harsh reality check but never looses faith in Black Adam even when he has no faith in him self and becomes the rallying point of the movie.
The bad guys are Intergang and Marwan Kenzari's Ishmael. Now Intergang is a a familiar name to DC fans and are a ruthless group of criminals and mercenaries and Ishmael is the villain he does lean towards the mustacho twirling side of villainy and the minute you see him on screen you just know this guy is up to no good.
The writing is good if not ground-breaking the story ramps up steadily from the beginning and doesn't slow and if you go with it you'll love it. The makers understood the way this sort of story needs to be told the bad guys are bad guys we don't wander off into a deep back ground of their organisation the fan boys know it and everyone else doesn't care. The villain is villainous his has a reason for doing what he's doing it's not complicated we are refreshingly not presented with some justification for his actions he's a villain end of story. And the heroes well they're heroic well mostly Black Adam is more ruthless and uncompressing than most heroes but he's mostly on the side of good. And the McGuffin is just that we get enough backstory of the setting to give us a framework for the action and a few titbits to flesh things out things but this is about Superheroes duking it out and that's what we are given
Overall this is a good solid Superhero action movie that understands what people want and gives it to them if that's what you are looking for you'll have a good time.
White Ghost (1988)
100% pure 80's action movie.
Oh yeah that's the good stuff 100% pure 80's action movie. It had everything the one man army, a huge body count, Explosions, buckets of blood, slow mo bad guy rag doll death and the Reb Brown yell what more could you want.
This is a true 80's actioner and sadly under appreciated perhaps because this was such a departure for Katt a man best know for the goofy and light hearted Greatest American Hero but he does a great job stepping into the action hero mould. I you love 80's action then you'll love this.
Monster Island (2019)
"The Asylum" you know the Cheese is strong with this one
The minute you see "The Asylum" you know the Cheese is strong with this one, so go in with the right mind set and you'll enjoy it. The story is straight forward and easy to follow avoiding some of the slightly disjointed writing of the earlier movies. The acting is good enough with the B movie stalwart Eric Roberts in a secondary role (who if IMDB is to be believed have 99 projects completed, filming, in post production or in pre production not someone who likes to stand idle) The CGI is serviceable and certainly better than 'Atlantic Rim' it is a giant monster movie in the vein of their Mega shark Vs movies (can you tell I have watched way too many The Asylum movies) . If you're fan a B monster movies then it is a fun and harmless way to kill 90 minutes.
UKM: The Ultimate Killing Machine (2006)
Saved by the acting Just
A fairly bog standard super solider gone wrong movie somewhat redeemed by some pretty good performances considering what they had to work with. Marsden does a good job of making his Major Elevins somewhat three dimensional character turning what could be a very standard evil military leader into someone who while willing to do what needs to be done actually cares about those he is in charge of.
Mac Fyfe turns in a good performance as Waylon taking his character from low level scumbag to believable hero plus he gets the best line in the movie. Stephen Arbuckle's Buddy gives a fun turn going from gung ho nerd to scenery chewing rage monster. Victoria Nestorowicz turns is good as Zoe going from street rat to strong but broken heroin. Erin Mackinnon does the best she can with what she is given but Carrie is maybe the least fleshed out.
The production is low budget and shows at time with some odd editing which I put down to not being able to do reshoots and having to work with what they had and the lack of gore effects with lots of people looking sickened and horrified but never doing more than showing some blood pools.
Good performances raise this from dull to ok not a cult classic but harmless fun.
The Dustwalker (2019)
Solid Low budget Scifi Horror
A Solid Sci Fi horror movie making good use of it's outback WA (Wester Australia) setting allowing the grim isolation of the outback town to be an unsung character in the film. The acting is solid and While the story takes a while to get going making the start of the movie slow the pace picks up near the end. The makeup effects are minimal but effective and the use of visual effects is again minimal but well done with only a couple minor effects looking a little wonky and the monster is well imagined.
Having said that there some compromises in the film that maybe more jarring to Australians than people from overseas. The one that threw me was I didn't realise the main character and her offsider were the local police till well into the film as Australian police ware uniforms with only detectives warring plain clothes and they kept talking about counties something we also don't have in Australia these quibbles were minor and didn't really detract from the film.
Give this movie a watch if you are looking for a solid low budget Scifi horror movie.
Miss Scarlet & the Duke (2020)
Can I have some more
To make Miss Scarlet and the Duke You will need
One part Ripper Street
One part Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries
Then add a dash of Murdoch Mysteries
This series again shows the advantage of the short six episode format which limits the filler and keeps the well crafted story moving.
Kate Phillips turns in a great performance as Miss Scarlet a character whose self assurance borders on arrogance but never crosses into unlikability and it is fun watching her bluffing for all she's worth when she ends up in well over her head.
Stuart Martin's William 'The Duke' Wellington's gruff real world experience works as a perfect counter point for Miss Scarlet enthusiasm and inexperience and you can feel his frustration and feelings for Miss Scarlet.
Ansu Kabia's Moses is Wellingtons opposite number coming from seedier side of life. Kabia turns in a solid performance and manages to be menacing and intimidating while also being charming.
I have to mention Andrew Gower's Rupert Parker who remined me a little of Poe from Altered Carbon and grew on me as the series went on and had a fun side arc that wove through the series.
This series is well worth a binge watch.
Mortdecai (2015)
A Modern Ealing comedies and I love it
All I can say to critics who panned this movie "Please remove head from nether regions before engaging mouth"
This movie reminds me of the Ealing comedies and what a wonderful breath of fresh air it is. Light, fast, surreal in places and a little naughty without crossing the line of being vulgar. Depp's loving homage to the classic Terry Thomas lovable cad character is wonderfully done. Gwyneth Paltrow's is a perfect compliment to Depp and Paul Bentley as the loyal and long suffering Jock is brilliant.
If you love Ealing comedies and you are willing to go with the flow you will have a great time
Sky Sharks (2020)
Out of its mind
If you love movies so god awful that they tancend their very awfulness and achieve a level of sheer insanity that they are just worth a watch then this is the movie for you.
mediocre to ok special effects, a plot so deranged that it should be complete gibberish but that just about makes sense and acting varying from hardwood to scenery chewing. Throw in blood, gore and over the top gratuitous nudity; and last but not least the giant cherry on top flying sharks ridden by nazi zombies.
Is it good Hell No is it worth a watch Hell Yes
Officer Downe (2016)
Gore greatness and so much more watch it and be surprised
"a police officer who can't be stopped by death returns to the streets time and time again to fight crime" Sounds like a bad 80's exploitation movie and this movie owes a lot to those movies, but like Robocop it manages to go beyond these roots.
It is Kim Coates portayal of officer Terry Downe that elevate this movie from cheesy scifi gore fest to cult classic. He makes him both an unstoppable bad ass and a sympathetic human character that you can relate to and root for. His scenes in the 'Bull Pen' are just perfect giving an emotional connection that pushes this movie beyond the ordinary.
Is this movie perfect no, some of the CGI effects are weak, the supporting characters are poorly fleshed out. I would of liked to see more backstory for the other main character Officer Gable played well by Tyler Ross. There are times the lower budget obviously put constrains on the movie, but having said that you can see that they got the most of from their budget.
If you like this sort of movies you will love this movie and if you don't you will miss the great heart of this movie behind the slightly dodgy special effects and over the top characters.
Zashchitniki (2017)
A werebear with a minigun what more could you ask for
I first spotted teaser trailers for this russian Superhero movie last year and have been looking out for it ever since (A werebear with a minigun what more can you ask for in a superhero movie). Before you read any further know that this review is based off the english Dub of the movie.
This movie has divided opinion some hate it some love it and I am in the later camp while not the greatest Superhero movie ever made it is nowhere near the worst many people have poked fun at the plot saying it is silly and has been done before, 99% of Superhero movie have 1 of 3 plots Revenge, Quest for Power or Heist with the hero's ethier carrying out or stopping said events.
Watch it enjoy it that's my opinion
EFFECTS : Right up there with the current crop of Marvel movies. Considering it was made for the equivalent of $5 million US (probably less than Marvel spent of catering) amazing.
PLOT : Standard Bad guy out to take over the world but it's a superhero movie apart from origin stories that is about 75 % of Such movies.
ACTING : Good (but see my comments on the dub)
Alina Lanina (Kseniya) This is one beautiful lady who kicks ass like Scarlett johansson.
Valeriya Shkirando (Mayor Elena Larina) Another classic beauty who doesn't get to a chance to really shine in the Maria Hill style role.
Anton Pampushnyy (Arsus) handsome, buff (sorry girls he's taken), and the brains of the group his character spends a large chunk of the movie as a CGI werebear with a minigun.
Sebastyan Sisak Grigoryan (Ler) does a good job as the monk like Ler.
Sanzhar Madi (Khan) Blades Brooding and Kung Fu kicking ass.
DUB: Not so good sadly the english dub is mid 80's Kung Fu movie watchable but poor lip sinking, badly chosen voice matches, and it felt flat with poor emotional range like the voice actors were reading from a script .
Mr. Right (2015)
SOMETIMES THINGS JUST WORK
Sometimes you find a movie by accident and am so glad you did and Mr Right is just that movie.
The plot is simple and fun. Not wanting to give away too much "A Girl unlucky in love finally meets Mr Right who just happens to be a hit man"
This whole movie revolves around the chemistry between Sam Rockwell's 'Fancis' and Anna Kendrick's 'Martha' and they have it in spades it is a pleasure to watch them together on screen and they make such a great and beliveable couple that it carries the rest of the movie along in their wake.
From the minute that they meet you want them to succeed and without that this movie wouldn't work.
Both leads take characters that could all to easily be unlikable and annoying and make them people that you would like to meet and spend time with. Rockwell is a treat to watch in this role as he dances and kills all along making light hearted banter much to the confusion and chagrin of his opponents. He makes the character likeable and believable and Kendrick what a standout performance she makes you like and care about 'Martha' a character walking the tightrope between crazy and manic, and Cute and lovable like a master, in the wrong hands this character would be annoying and grating .
The action scenes are well choreographed and and fun keeping it light and fast never going to far but just far enough with the blood and gore.
Rounding out the main characters is Tim Roth who is a perfect counterpoint to Rockwell and Kendrick. He is the perfect bad for the film you don't want him to succeed but you also sort of like him.
All I can say is sit back, put your feet up and enjoy yourself.
Max Steel (2016)
It Does Its Best
One thing I wish to get off my chest before I start; I have seen a large number of reviews unfavourably comparing this movie with the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU). Before you peg that particular rock take this into account, This movies entire budget was $10,000,000 while Ant Man the el cheapo of the MCU had a budget of $130,000,000 so drop that rock.
SPOILERS BEYOND THIS POINT!!!!!!
Sadly it is obvious that what caused this movie just not to work...MONEY; they started with a small budget then one of the characters 'Steel' is going to be almost entirely CGI next they go for Quality over Quantity by hiring Andy Garcia (Oceans 11,12,13) as Miles Edwards and Maria Bello (The Company of Men) as Molly Mcgrath add a couple of young people to play the hero and his love interest then throw in some bit parts and extras and guess what there isn't much left.
So what are you left with a script which they have had to slash huge chunks of the original story line (see below for a thumb nail sketch of the differences) and still feels rushed at the end and slow at the start. There is no real character development main character opting for the default brooding loner character and the tacked on love interest a pretty mechanic chick finally two incredibly short fights in a movie about a character who can be summed up in five words "Max Steel Beats up Aliens'.
If I had to some the movie up in a few words it would be
"You can see every cent they didn't spend"
The movie does it's best with the money it has but Max Steel needed a budget of at least 30+ million to try and do the character justice
TV Series The Max Steel origin story story from the Series is Max McGrath is the son of the founder of N-Tech a secret paramilitary that help keep the world safe from what is later revealed to alien invaders.
Max's Father died in an accident when he was a baby. One day while visiting N-Tech's Max's out of control T.U.R.B.O. (Tachyon Unlimited Radiant Bio-Optimized Energy) Energy causes Max's fathers old Techno Organic partner Steel to awaken out of it's long stasis and bond with Max controlling his T.U.R.B.O. Energy (something his father also had) and turning Max into Max Steel Superhero and defender of earth.
It is later revealed that Max's fathers Accident was caused by Max's Fathers Partner Miles Dredd secretly siphoning of Max's Fathers T.U.R.B.O. energy during the experiment (Later revealed to be a super weapon to defeat the aliens) for his own use causing the explosion that killed his father and fused the energy Syphon to Dredd and causing him to need T.U.R.B.O. energy to survive.
Movie After many years of constant moving Max and his mother return to their old town near the facility where his father was killed in an accident. Max's Tachyon energy (it is only called T.U.R.B.O. energy once by steel in passing) is beginning to go out of control.
The flairs of energy awaken Steel from Stasis and escapes from the containment facility and goes in search of Max who he bonds with just as Max is about to explode. Before Max and Steel begin to explore his abilities they are attacked by generic black clad merc types in black four wheel drives. the pair escape and after an incredibly short training montage they are attacked by an evil alien ultra link which max just manages to defeat. now on the run from aliens and mercs Max's heads to the abandoned N-Tech facility to look for answers there they run into Miles Edwards an old family friend who it turns out and is working with the aliens and sabotage the weapon system that his father used his T.U.R.B.O. energy to power