♪ ♪ HELEN: We do our best to keep up with the rent.

Hugh's good to us.

JAMES: He's your landlord?

♪ ♪ JAMES: I'll take good care of him.

You have my word.

SIEGFRIED: All you do is laze around while I foot the bill.

TRISTAN: I need to get Tricki walking and lose weight so I can go back to college.

He's been at the liqueurs.

How on Earth did he get into the hamper?

It was me.

MRS. HALL: You're staying?

JAMES: Siegfried's decided to tutor Tristan himself.

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ Looks like a good turnout for the Darrowby fair.

MRS. HALL (grimly): Oh, it does.

Which is why it's the perfect time to open the surgery up to the public.

Show ourselves off at our professional best.

Yes, so you said.

I'm sure we'll still get to see some of the fun.

Ah, James... all set?

I think so.

Nice badge.

Now, don't forget, you're representing the practice.

I won't, Siegfried-- I'm honored.

♪ ♪ (toy rifles firing) (pounding, bell ringing, cow lowing) (cows lowing) Come on, Clive.

FOYLE: Mr. Herriot!

Right on time, I'm pleased to see.

Of course, Mr. Foyle, looking forward to it.

Good, good.

Well, we've a lot to get through.

"Tempus fergit" as they say.

Two bob says he won't last past lunchtime.

MRS. HALL: Honestly, Tristan.

Remember when Grier did it?

Drunk by midday, threatened to punch Foyle in the mouth.

Morning's not the problem, it's the pony measuring, it gets them every time.

Two bob, 3:30.

What do you say, Mrs. Hall?

Think he'll make it to the family pets?

I most certainly do.

And I don't approve of gambling.

Two bob, 6:00-- not a minute sooner.

FOYLE: Here, these are for you.

A map of the show-- you'll see that each area is numbered.

Two for the bull enclosure, four for the goats and so forth.

The key is at the bottom.

All seems clear enough.

And here's a full timetable of events.

Now I've marked up your particular responsibilities.

The pony measuring will commence at 1:30 sharp in area ten.

That's the, uh, the yard at Skeldale House?

It is, and then at 5:00 p.m., you'll be required to judge the pet show in area nine.

Also Skeldale House?

Yes.

At all other times, as attending vet, you must remain here, in area one.

So you can be located immediately.

Now, my watch is synchronized with the village clock.

I would suggest that you do the same.

(chuckling) Right... Oh... (clock chiming) FOYLE: Skeldale House is now open, that's Skeldale House is now open to the public.

(sighs deeply) SIEGFRIED: Right, time for our first tour, I think, Mrs. Hall.

How many are we?

Three.

Well...

I'm sure things will pick up as the day goes on.

Lady and gentlemen... welcome.

Today we shall be lifting the curtain on the fascinating world of veterinary science.

If I could ask you to step this way?

That's it... And please do refrain from touching the equipment.

Now this is... You don't mind if I pop out, do you?

Might see how old James is getting on.

Don't think I don't know what you're up to.

You leave him be.

Mrs. Hall, I'm offended!

A gentleman never interferes in a wager.

(Siegfried chatting) (inhales sharply) (crowd cheering) He's in fine form, Mrs. Burton.

I'd be surprised if you don't take home a ribbon this year.

(dog barking) Watch what you're doing, will you?

I'm so sorry, Mr. Dinsdale.

Bloody menace... HELEN: James!

Sorry, sorry.

Mind your sen, lad!

There you are, thank God.

Will you have a look at Jenny's ferret?

I was trying to trim his nails, but he wouldn't stay still.

Okay.

And now he's bleeding!

Let's take a look, shall we?

JAMES: Does he bite?

JENNY: Not much.

(ferret cooing) (jaws snap) Ow!

Oh, God.

No, Leopold, let go!

JENNY: Stop pulling your hand!

If you jump around he'll just bite harder Ah!

And I thought vets were supposed to have a way with animals.

(both laughing) (hammer pounding, bell ringing) There... Ah!

(horse whinnies) (James chuckles) JENNY: And now you're bleeding and all!

Sorry... FOYLE: Registration for the dog show has now...

The next tour will be starting shortly.

Please do help yourselves to tea.

Thank you.

Any chance of anything stronger?

(gasps) Dorothy!

What are you doing here?

I was hoping to whisk you off for a spot of lunch, but I seem to have walked in on some kind of extravaganza.

It's the Darrowby Show.

You stuck in here all day?

'Fraid so.

Well, that's no fun.

Perhaps I can lend a hand?

You'd be bored rigid.

Nonsense!

It'll be just like the old days.

The two of us running the show.

But without the zeppelins.

Or the rationing.

Well, that's something, I suppose.

Ferret emergency.

JAMES: Great, the powder will stop stop Leopold's paw bleeding in no time.

He won't even need a bandage.

Shame we can't say the same for you.

TRISTAN: Oh, you know James.

Happy to risk life and limb for a damsel in distress.

(ferret chittering) It's looking better already.

We'll make a vet of you yet.

TRISTAN: There you are, good as new.

Here we go.

Are you showing Clive today?

We are, Dad's desperate to sell him.

(surprised): Really?

I thought he was a good earner?

Oh he is, but he won't be forever.

There's a top breeder coming today, woman called Southwick, says she might be interested.

If Clive takes first prize, we could get a really good price.

Good luck.

In fact, I was hoping I could ask you to vouch for him, you know, give him a clean bill of health, if the deal goes ahead.

Of course.

I'd, I'd be happy to.

Wonderful.

Thanks-- I'd best go and find me Dad.

Wasn't old Clive a little bit... slow off the mark with Dobson's cows?

Nothing a shot of testosterone didn't sort out.

If that bull wins first prize, could go for a fortune.

God knows they need it.

So long as you're confident there's, uh, no problem.

After the testosterone was administered, Clive did start doing his business.

No, I know, I know.

Just the moment there's even the slightest hint that Clive's no good for breeding he'd be practically worthless.

Off to the knackers yard for pennies.

Maybe I should give him another once over.

Well, you've already told Helen you'll vouch for him.

Now come on, enough of this, you've been neglecting your real duties for far too long already.

(bar crowd chattering) TRISTAN: That's more like it.

You're starting early.

Well, my good friend here needs fortification for the day ahead, so, we'll be wanting two more, when you're ready.

Steady on.

You know I'm on duty.

That's why you need to get them in while you have the chance.

(mugs clink) So, have you had your invitation yet?

Ah-- what invitation?

Tea with the parents.

Now you're sticking around, she'll be expecting things to get a little more serious.

(scoffs) What?

Maggie?

I don't think so.

If you're sure.

Mr. Herriot... could you spare a minute?

It's a veterinary matter.

I'd value your opinion.

Of course!

Uh, can't it wait?

Sorry, Tris, vet business.

Well, at least take one with you!

You have them.

You can settle in for a nice long chat.

(bell tolling) My, she's a little beauty, isn't she?

(cow lowing) A dark roan shorthorn.

I'm thinking of buying her.

♪ ♪ Nice wide pelvis... Level udder.

She's a lovely pedigree specimen.

♪ ♪ You know, a cow like this doesn't come cheap, Mr. Rudd.

That she doesn't.

But with your say so and recommendation, we've been putting some by, and I'd like to make the investment in a good breeder.

All you need is one really good animal.

You know, five year from now, we could have a pedigree herd.

So... Would you buy her?

I would.

Was that Dick Rudd I saw you talking to out there?

He asked me to look over a pedigree cow he's thinking about buying.

A testament to his high regard for your professional opinion.

Can I ask you something?

Mm-hmm?

Just because you have to administer testosterone to a bull to get it serving the cows, doesn't necessarily mean there's got to be an underlying problem?

Oh no, not necessarily.

He might just need a bit of a lift.

Must be exhausting moving from herd to herd like they do.

(exhales) Of course, it could also be lameness.

The only thing that really matters is whether the cows are in calf or not.

Right.

(indistinct chatter, toy guns firing) (bell rings) (dog barking) Mr. Dobson!

Hello, there.

Ah, Mr. Herriot.

I've been meaning to ask, how did your herd get on with the Alderson's bull in the end?

Oh, yeah, yeah, grand.

FOYLE: Mr. Herriot!

So, no problems after I left?

No, no, no-- no problems.

Mr. Herriot, if you please...

Yes, Mr. Foyle, just one moment...

So your cows are in calf then?

You're needed at the dog show.

I'll let you get on.

(thumping clipboard) Mr. Herriot!

Dog show-- now, if you please!

Now, can anyone tell me what this is?

No?

Well, we use this to administer anesthetic during surgery.

You slip it over the head... tighten the strap, and slip in... the chloroform.

It's very effective... (muffled snore) and entirely painless.

(groans) (chuckles) So then, once little Tiddles or Fido is happily asleep... (snoring) Yes, thank you.

We move onto our top-of-the-range surgical equipment.

We have scalpels for making the initial incision.

Thank you.

(imitates cutting sound) We have saws for cutting through the bone.

(imitates creaky cutting sound) Various sizes, for various thicknesses.

(louder cutting sound) And, of course, a whole variety of forceps and curettes for really digging around... (making visceral splattering sounds) (chuckles) Oh dear.

Yes, well, moving on... (clock chimes) Right, a quick hiatus, I think, Mrs. Hall.

I might see what refreshments are on offer.

Oh, hello there.

Mr. Farnon.

You remember Dorothy.

Yes, yes, of course, how nice to see you again.

I hear you're quite the tour guide.

Oh, well, doing our best.

"Very informative" and "not boring at all," apparently.

(chuckles) Oh well, high praise indeed.

Anyway, um, shan't be long.

Oh, Tris, are you coming?

(door opens) (door shuts) Couldn't you go too, Aud?

I can't leave surgery unattended.

As they both well know.

Well, I'm here.

And I'm reasonably trustworthy-- go on, you're dying to have a look around.

You can repay me later in gin.

Well... maybe just for a minute.

(indistinct voice over loudspeaker) Oh, hello there.

Where have you been hiding?

The guinea pigs in the shed needed fresh straw.

And I gave the tabby new water.

Did you now?

Well, I'd say that's worth sixpence for the store, wouldn't you?

Thank you!

They won't let us in the show.

I know you need to be careful, veterinary, but there's nowt wrong with dog.

There's some matter in the corner of his eye.

Oh, that's just a bit of powder I was using on him, that's all.

I told that to him.

I don't know why he's being so fussy.

His temperature's 104.

I'm sorry, I can't allow him into the show.

But we've shown this dog every year.

Well, you can't show him with a temperature like that.

But wait a minute!

He's had a long car journey.

That could put up his temperature, couldn't it?

Not by that much, it couldn't.

You need to take him home and see your regular vet.

So you won't let me take him inside?

I'm afraid it's out of the question.

I'm sorry.

There you are, come on, don't dilly dally.

Sorry?

Luncheon is served, old boy and there's a pint or three with your name on it.

(radio playing, dishes clanking) Hi there, Mr. Herriot.

Um, Helen says you'll vouch for our bull.

Uh, yes, of course.

Much appreciate it.

You're welcome, Mr. Alderson.

Aye.

HUGH : Ah, Herriot, just the man.

May I introduce my goddaughter, Penelope?

Hello there.

And this here is Binkie.

She's, uh, feeling a little nervous about the pet contest.

Ah, there's no need.

I'm sure Binkie here will do marvelously.

There you are, Pen.

I told you there was nothing to worry about.

FOYLE (over loudspeaker): Mr. Herriot, area ten... All right, well... Helen said that she told you about their possible buyer.

Uh, yes, she did.

Lot riding on the sale of that bull for the Aldersons.

Well, yes, I would imagine so.

Wouldn't want anything to scupper their chances.

No need to go... looking for problems, if you take my meaning?

Right, well, come on, Pen, let's go find your mother, shall we?

Here you go, and there's plenty more where that came from.

You do know you're wasting your time?

What do you mean?

You can't compete, old chap.

He's got the land, the house, the pots of cash.

Helen's no gold-digger, but a girl has to be practical.

He was talking about Alderson's bull.

Oh, yes?

I got the distinct impression he was... warning me off.

Oh, so you think he's feeling threatened?

That is not... no!

(laughs) This is not about Helen.

Come on, drink up and we'll go to the Drovers.

I can't leave the show.

Course you can.

You've done your bit-- Foyle can measure a few ponies.

(dog barks) Oh... Do you know that fellow?

It'd be about his dog.

Ignore him.

Stay and have a drink.

No, I can't, sorry.

But... Jim...

I see James is still going strong.

Lunchtime you said, wasn't it?

'Fraid you're out of the running, little brother.

♪ ♪ Still 104.

I told you.

Look... he seems fine in himself!

Honestly... And I'm telling you: keeping him here is irresponsible.

He shouldn't be around other dogs.

You need to put him in your car and take him home.

FOYLE: Mr. Herriot!

Please report to area ten for the pony measuring.

FOYLE: That's Mister Herriot, area ten, pony measuring!

(whistling) DOROTHY: That's it, names and addresses in the book.

And the next tour will be starting shortly.

Is everything all right-- where's Mrs. Hall?

She's gone to get some lunch.

Oh... Don't worry, I've been keeping a close eye.

No one's made off with the silverware.

(chuckling) That's good to know.

So, um, how was your trip?

Uh... Malta, wasn't it?

It was glorious.

Blazing hot with nothing to do but sun and swim.

Darrowby must seem rather dull in comparison.

Not at all, I'm really rather enjoying myself.

Although, that chap over there keeps asking me to examine his cat.

He's convinced she's swallowed an entire ball of yarn.

Mr. Goggins, yes-- last time it was a fob watch complete with chain.

Goodness.

And was the cat all right?

She was-- as was the watch, it turned out he put it away in a drawer.

(laughs) Oh, dear.

Well, I should, uh, go and get my coat and then we should, um, crack on.

Your audience awaits.

(children playing) ♪ ♪ FOYLE: Mr. Herriot!

Did you not hear me?

You are needed for the ponies.

Yes... yes, I know.

There's just a bull I need to look at.

Is the animal injured?

Does it require urgent medical attention?

It does not.

Then I'm afraid it will have to wait.

(cow mooing) Thirteen two.

I'm sorry, he's too big for that class.

Well, have you allowed for his shoes?

I have, but as you can see, he's well over thirteen two.

He's actually over fourteen hands.

He passed the vet at Hickly without any trouble.

I can't help that.

If you want him to compete, he'll need to be in the higher class.

Next please!

You really do need to keep 'em moving, Mr. Herriot.

"Tempus fergit," you know?

There was another chap was convinced his dog was psychic because it always barked just before the doorbell rang.

Never occurred to him that the animal just had better hearing than he did.

(both laughing) Well, it's true what they say.

You really do see all human life in a place like this.

Well, I suppose we do.

I think you're a very fortunate man, Mr. Farnon.

You've built a life doing what you love most.

Not many people manage that.

And have you?

On the whole.

I've had my share of... disappointments.

And loss.

Things don't always work out the way we expect.

Very true.

But moving forward in hope, that's the key, isn't it?

There's so much in life to savor.

Audrey, there you are.

You've been missing all the fun.

Oh, yes?

Goggins' cat!

Endless entertainment.

But you two ladies should be out enjoying the show.

Tristan and I can manage here.

Of course.

What do you say, Aud?

Did promise me a gin.

If you're quite sure?

Absolutely.

Well, it's been a pleasure working with you, Mr. Farnon.

And with you.

♪ ♪ Maggie seems thoroughly and surprisingly enamored of you.

Does she?

Mm.

Oh, God.

Do I detect that the thrill of the chase is less exciting than the actual catch?

Maggie's wonderful, really, I'm just not sure about meeting parents.

Because that's what happens next.

I mean do you think I'm anywhere near ready to meet parents?

Mmm... Dorothy left her hat.

I won't have a man under my roof mess a girl around.

You're better than that, Tristan.

Yes, Mrs. H. Right, I've still an hour or two to win this bet.

I'm off to the pony measuring, see if I can't tip James over the edge.

SIEGFRIED: Everything all right?

I've barely had a single animal that's the right height for the class they've been entered in.

Ah.

And I had one that stooped down at the knees every time I came near him.

Pin pricks.

I'm sorry?

They prick them between the shoulder blades, so they drop down if you try and measure them.

What?

It's appalling, I know.

You see, this is what you're up against.

(sighs) ♪ ♪ (clock bell rings) Here, get a drink.

ANNOUNCER: And the winner for the best in show sheep goes to Mrs. Ackroyd...

Excuse me, do you know where the vet is?

I'm sorry, I don't, I don't, I'm sorry.

Do you know where the vet is?

No, no, sorry, I don't.

Siegfried can certainly be very entertaining.

He has his moments.

You said he was a widower?

He lost his wife four years ago.

I would have thought it was more recent.

Oh, yes?

Am I to take it you've designs on our Mr. Farnon?

(laughs) Oh, don't think so.

Reckon I'd scare the poor chap to death.

Besides, he strikes me as a man who still thinks of himself as married.

Well, you can't always change how you feel.

Leaving that brute was the best and bravest thing you ever did.

Yes, well... Now, I promised Mr. Enderby I'd look in on the produce hall, he's very keen to show me his shallots.

Then I shall love you and leave you.

I'll see you soon, Aud.

(children playing in background) JAMES: I'm sorry.

I've measured him three times, he's still over.

What about the shoes?

You have to deduct for shoes.

I know, but even so...

He doesn't have shoes.

(laughs) What's this?

Certificate.

Where's the pony?

Here we go.

You don't need to see him if you've got a certificate.

The vet's written how tall he's at.

I'll need to measure him, certificate or not.

Well, that's not what my dad says.

Well, I'm afraid your dad's wrong.

We'll see about that.

It's unbelievable, isn't it?

They'll try anything.

If I were you, I'd tell them to go hang.

Are you sure you don't want to go and watch the jumping, Siegfried?

No, no-- happy to lend my support.

JUDGE: And the winner for the largest marrow...

Very well done.

(light applause) Congratulations, marvelous effort.

Well done.

(toy rifle firing) That's not right.

These guns ain't right.

STALL OWNER: Can't you read?

I'm a good shot, I am.

No refunds means no refunds.

STALL OWNER: Not my fault you can't shoot straight.

It's a waste of time, come on... Give us our money back!

You ought to find yourself a lad with half a brain.

Let's go.

Steady, steady!

Whoa!

(gourd splatters, dog whimpers) You've got to accept it!

You don't need any measurements if you've got a certificate.

Every animal goes under the stick.

And it's not as though your pony was slightly over the mark.

He's miles over!

Well, let me tell you, he were passed through that vet at... Hickly-- I know, and I don't care, he's not going through here.

Well, really!

You know, we were passed at Hickly too.

Could you take my dog's temperature again?

He looks so much better.

Won't you just try him one more time?

No, I bloody won't!

Just take your damn dog home.

You know, James, if you wanted to pack it in... What?

You don't have to put up with this, this is an outrage.

MRS. HALL: Mr. Farnon!

I need you.

Hey, what you doing with my dog?

(crowd chattering) (door opens, footsteps approaching) (dog whimpering) What's happened?

Poor thing were hit by a pumpkin.

Pumpkin?

He was tied up safe as houses.

I'd only left him for a minute.

Sometimes a minute is all it takes.

I'll need you to assist me.

If it hadn't been for that other vet messing me about.

You have to wait there, Mister...?

Happy.

Really?

Yes.

Excuse me.

(dog whining) Okay...

There we go.

I'll need chloroform, sterile dressings, and a fresh set of instruments.

This will provide an excellent teaching opportunity.

Right.

Well, go on then, what're you waiting for?

(bell tolling) FOYLE: Oy!

Leave that alone!

(children laughing) Ah, Mr. Herriot, finished with the ponies, are you?

Well and truly.

Good, good.

Hey, hey, hey now, you've only 25 minutes till the pet contest.

Don't go wandering off.

Mr. Foyle, there is something I have to do, all right?

But I promise you, I will not be late for the pet contest.

You'd better not be.

(through bullhorn): Or there'll be serious repercussions.

JAMES: No... (stammers) (James sighs) I thought they weren't judging the bulls till 5:30?

No, they announce the winners at 5:30.

The judging takes place throughout the afternoon, and then the judges retire to deliberate.

You'd know this if you'd consulted your timetable.

SHIPHAM: All right there, veterinary?

Yes.

Thanks.

Mr. Shipham, isn't it?

You haven't seen Mr. Dobson at all, have you?

I can't say I have.

Here, I've heard you like a drop of the old home brew.

I shouldn't, really.

Nonsense!

Man's gotta drink.

Cheers!

That's the way!

Here, have a pie!

Thank you!

Sorry!

Mr. Dobson!

Mr. Dobson!

I need to talk to you.

Good boy, that's it.

Right, probe and forceps.

There's no point giving them to me.

This one's on you.

It's a compound fracture, so first you need to check for bone fragments.

Right.

I can't see any fragments.

Are you certain?

I think so.

I don't need you to think, I need you to know.

I'm certain, the bone's snapped clean in two.

Excellent.

Then if you debride the wound and sluice it out with plenty of saline, we can set the bone and stitch him up.

Now when you say "we"... Come on, we don't want to be here all day.

(sighs) Mr. Dobson, I am just asking if you noticed any problems when the bull was in with your herd.

And I told you, everything were fine.

So you're certain your cows are in calf, you've actually examined them?

Would Mr. Herriot, please report to area nine?

The family pet contest is about to commence.

Looks like you're needed.

Damn.

Very nice.

Very nice, indeed.

(chuckles) Think I might be getting the hang of this.

You seemed to be having fun today.

Yes, the tours went rather well I thought.

I was thinking more of the fair Dorothy.

Dorothy?

The pair of you were getting on like a house on fire.

Oh, I don't know about that.

She's a nice enough woman.

Oh come on, big brother.

I saw the way you were looking at her.

For God's sake, Tristan, must you be so tediously adolescent?

Well, what's the problem?

She's a woman, you're a man.

There's clearly an attraction there.

You should've asked her out to dinner.

Don't be obtuse, you know perfectly well taking a woman to dinner raises certain expectations.

Would that be such a bad thing?

I'm not discussing this.

Because you know I'm right.

No, because I'm not taking romantic advice from someone who's spent the entire day hiding from a barmaid.

Says the man who runs a mile if a woman shows the slightest interest.

What utter rot!

I'm right and you know it!

It's like you've given up on having any life at all.

(phone clatters) Oh, well done, lad.

Not long to go now.

FOYLE: You are ten minutes late.

I know, I know, I'm sorry.

Could I just have a word with Ms. Alderson?

No!

It'll have to wait.

TRISTAN: I'm not saying you need to get married, just have some blasted fun!

SIEGFRIED: If you had a bit less blasted fun, you might actually achieve something!

(dogs barking) SIEGFRIED: Now give me the damn forceps!

(knocks on door) Mr. Farnon!

What?

There are children on the premises.

Your point being?

I'll thank you to modify your language.

And I'll thank you to mind your own bloody business.

In there-- now.

(various small animals chittering) ♪ ♪ Well, what a wonderful... PARROT: Hello, pretty boy.

...and varied turnout.

(birds chirping) Well, given the, given the range of animals, I'm going to ask the owners to show me just how much they know their pets.

Just a couple of questions about their habit and upkeep, how does that sound?

MYNA BIRD: Shut your face!

(laughs uncomfortably) Right then, let's begin.

I miss her too, you know.

What?

Evelyn was... She was the absolute best.

No two ways about it, but... Well... she isn't here anymore, Siegfried.

If you're going to continue stating the obvious you might as well leave.

I'm just saying, she'd at least want you to try and be happy.

I mean, you're not entirely past it.

Good to know-- bandage.

I'm only thinking of you, big brother.

Fine, right, point taken, I should move on and seize the day, and learn to love again.

Now, for God sake, will you please shut up?

Hello there.

Binkie, isn't it?

And does he eat anything unusual?

Uh, he ate a button once.

But it came straight out t'other end.

And what about exercise?

And how old is this... little lass?

HUGH: Speak up, Pen.

He does have some lovely markings.

(ferret chitters) Do you let them of the cage sometimes?

And what can you tell me about this little chap?

He's a goldfish.

Or carassius auratus.

He's only a year old, but goldfish have been known to live up to 30 years in captivity.

His diet mainly consists of fish food pellets, but he can also be fed boiled peas and brine shrimp... Well, I think we have a winner.

Thank you, Mr. Foyle.

Now in third place, number ten, the kitten.

MOTHER: Well done, love.

In second place, number fifteen, the ferret.

And in a very well deserved first place...

Number six!

The goldfish!

(James applauding, murmured grumbling, dog barking) Um, well, my congratulations to the winners and thank you, everyone, for taking part.

(muttering) Disgrace... Oh, sorry, sorry.

Sorry.

Excuse me, Miss Alderson.

Well, I suppose that didn't go too badly.

I'm sorry, Mr. Foyle, I really can't talk now.

Excuse me, thank you-- Helen!

(sheep bleating) (panting) (clattering) It was the pet show that did it for you.

Don't be too hard on yourself.

It's no mean feat lasting as long as you did.

It wasn't the pets.

What then?

I'm fairly certain Helen's bull has a problem.

And Dobson won't give me a straight answer as to whether his cows are in calf or not.

Well, if they were, you'd assume he'd just say?

Well, exactly.

I gave Helen my word that I'd vouch for Clive.

(sighs) You could always lie.

Hope it doesn't come back to bite you on the backside.

Because that worked so well for you in the past?

Look, there's no guarantee Southwick will actually want to buy him in.

She only goes for the very top beasts-- best in show.

Maybe Clive won't win.

Maybe Southwick will buy some other bull and you can live to fight another day.

You're right... you're right.

What if you're not?

What if he wins?

Hide in here.

It's what I do whenever there's someone or something that I want to avoid.

That seems rather cowardly.

Just because there's a firing squad lined up doesn't mean you have to go and stand in front of it.

SIEGFRIED: Tristan, where the bloody hell are you?

Speaking of which.

(sighs) ♪ ♪ FOYLE (distant): The prize giving for the bull contest will commence in five minutes, that's five minutes.

(animal snorts) ♪ ♪ Steady on there, Clive, old man.

Steady.

Steady, that's it... That's it.

(Clive grunts) I just want to take a look at you.

(pained bellow) (softly) Damn.

James?

I asked you to leave it alone.

So I take it you know?

Dobson was... complaining about his herd.

I just didn't want him to put off the Alderson's buyer.

They can't sell an animal that isn't fit.

Well, we don't know that for sure.

I'm pretty sure.

(Clive moos) All right.

(quietly): All right.

But I'm asking you to keep it to yourself.

Just for today.

(Clive bellows) I can't do that.

Look, I'm asking you as a favor, James.

Not for me.

For Helen.

She trusts you.

And if you care about her at all, then you won't let her down.

(sighs) (toy rifle fires) JENNY: I missed again!

It's cheating, that's what it is, I'm not paying sixpence for a broken rifle.

STALL OWNER: I told you, them's the rules.

What's going on?

Me gun didn't work, but he still won't give me me money back.

Is that right?

That's what they all say.

Makes no difference.

Perhaps I'll take a turn.

That'll be sixpence.

(coins jingling) (loads rifle) (slight squeaking) When you're ready.

(rifle fires, can clangs) (reloads rifle) (rifle fires, can clangs) SIEGFRIED: The plaster must stay on for two weeks.

SIEGFRIED: By rights, I should keep him in overnight, but as you're not local... Oh no, no, I wouldn't know what to do with meself without him.

Just me and him, see, since the wife died.

(dog whimpers) He was her pride and joy, he was.

There's no charge.

(Mr.

Happy sighs heavily) I'm so very grateful, Mr. Farnon.

Not at all, not at all.

Just, in future, if you must tie him up, make sure it's somewhere safe.

I will do.

Thank you.

(dog whimpering) Mr. Herriot.

(door opens) Right, I don't know about you, but I need a drink.

Oh unless you're still avoiding the refreshment hall?

I'm sure I'll manage.

There's my brave soldier.

James?

I'll be right there.

5:45.

The old girl could still win this.

(chambers bullet) MAN: We have the results of the contest for the best bull.

Judges and adjudicators would like to thank everyone... (rifle fires, can clangs) SIEGFRIED: Well, I never.

Mrs. Hall's a crack shot.

TRISTAN: Who'd have thought it?

(chambers bullet) (rifle fires, can clangs) (laughs, claps) Well, what was it you wanted, Jenny?

The dog?

Or the bear?

I'd say we've won both.

JAMES: Well done!

Where on earth did you learn to shoot like that?

What did you think we did in the WRNS?

Embroidery?

Right, drinks.

JENNY: Thank you, Mrs. Hall!

MAN: And the first prize goes to... Mr. Alderson with Clive!

(applause) Very well done, congratulations.

(applause) Marvelous.

A round of applause for the winner.

(cheers, applause) ♪ ♪ SIEGFRIED: Uh, pint and a half of best, please.

Coming right up.

Ah...

So is your, um, friend no longer with us?

No-- she had to get back.

Ah, yes... of course.

FOYLE: (clears throat) I found it lying on the ground, Mr. Herriot.

It was creating a serious trip hazard.

I'm sorry.

Yes, well... Look I, I realize this was your first time, but if I can... Oh, I'm very sorry to interrupt.

But I'm afraid James is needed at the bar.

You can owe me a pint for that one.

Ah, won't be a minute.

Hello there, stranger.

How was the open house?

Yes, yes, good, thanks.

Um... Maggie, I've been thinking and, um... this summer has been a lot of fun and you're a really great girl.

But the thing is, my final exams are not far off and I'm going to be working all hours, and... You're giving me... the push?

(breathes heavily) No, no, no not at all, far from it!

I just... (laughing) Give over, will you?

You're a nice enough lad, Tristan, but... it's not like we'd have ever been serious.

Right.

Why's that, then?

James!

Ah, there you are.

This is, uh, Mr. Herriot, vet I were telling you about.

SOUTHWICK: How do?

Southwick.

I hear you can vouch for this bull of theirs, is that right?

'Cause I always like a professional opinion before I hand over good money.

Right, yes.

I wonder, could I speak to you for a moment, Mr. Alderson.

Eh!

Come on, lad!

Time's money, just say it word and we'll have ourselves a deal.

I'd really like to examine him first, rule out any possible problems.

What sort of problems?

There are no problems.

Here, you can, you can ask Dobson, he's got no complaints.

His cows are all pregnant, like they should be.

Is that right, Mr. Dobson?

Can you say for certain that your cows are in calf?

(mutters): Well...

I, I don't know about... for certain.

You what?

There's nowt wrong with my bloody bull.

I'm afraid, I noticed some swelling on his spine... and some signs of discomfort.

You're saying the beast is lame?

(sighs) James?

It's most likely intermittent, and very easily missed.

But... yes.

He may well be.

HELEN: But Mr. Dobson, if your cows weren't in calf, why lie about it?

Do you know something about this?

Hugh?

(sighs) Dobson was grumbling about his herd and it occurred to me that it'd be better off all round if he just kept his complaints to himself, so I...

I slipped him a few bob.

Of all the bloody... stupid... What were you thinking?

Helen, I only wanted to help.

Well, now the sale is off and you've made my dad out to be a liar.

So thank you.

Poor beggar.

I'd say he's cooked his goose, wouldn't you?

You can't imagine how hard it is seeing you so terribly worried about money all the time!

That's no excuse.

I know, but you won't let me do anything!

So you thought you'd go behind me back?

Because having money means you can interfere in other people's lives?

Because, because I'm too stupid to make me own decisions, Because you're a man and you know best.

It's because I love you.

♪ ♪ Oh, yep, he's a goner.

You can tell from the body language, see?

The coup-de-grace and then the dramatic exit.

I love you, Helen.

And I would do anything in the world to make you happy.

(quickly) You've never said that before.

No, I know.

But I should have.

God knows I've wanted to.

I'm just so hopeless at these things... Oh, yes.

You are.

♪ ♪ Huh!

Jammy sod.

How'd he manage to talk himself out of that?

HARRISON: I told him...

I'm gonna make a formal complaint, I mean... You can't just ignore a certificate!

I know my rights!

A bloody goldfish... Aye, I ask you.

Who's ever heard of a goldfish winning a competition?

I'll have you know all I have done, all day, and in the face of endless abuse and insult, I might add, is try to make fair and just decisions.

And I have to say, I have never in my life witnessed such an appalling display of unsportsmanlike and downright criminal behavior.

(bellowing): If anyone should be ashamed, it's you lot!

You might want to put down the stick.

Happen you've got a point, young man.

Cheaters shouldn't prosper.

Well, James, I think we can safely say you're one of us now.

(indistinct chatter) I suppose so.

I knew you could do it.

Speaking of which, he's made it to 6:15.

So... Two bob, wasn't it?

(grunts, coins jingling) You had a bet?

Against me?

More of a sweepstake.

You could've warned me.

Baptism of fire, old chap.

Baptism of fire.

SIEGFRIED: The labors of Hercules pale in comparison to being a vet at the Darrowby show.

(sighs) Cheers.

(mugs clank) (chuckling) ♪ ♪ (sneezes) Bed, now!

Out of the question.

Who's next?

(all clamoring) You're suggesting an operation.

You'd be giving them false hope.

Follow your heart; it's what got you here in the first place, isn't it?

Siegfried will kill us.

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