Learning Task #4: Asynchronous Activity

EDPS 674
University of Calgary

Christina Majcher
March 21, 2015

Dialogue segment
Helper: Hi Nicole. Before we
start I want to share some
limits to confidentiality. Some
people think that everything
that is discussed in therapy is
strictly confidential and
generally that is true but I
wanted to let you know that
there are a few legal
limitations to your
confidentiality. I bring this up
just because I want you to be
fully informed. So, just to give
you an example, if you share
anything that leads me to
believe that a child or a
dependent person, basically
somebody that can't look after
themselves is going to be
harmed, I would need to let
other individuals know. Also if
you intend to harm another
person or yourself then I might
need to disclose that
information to another
individual. Do you have any
questions about the limits to
confidentiality before we get
started?

Skill demonstrated
Outlining limits to
confidentiality

Purpose of skill
Ensure client is fully
informed of the
legal limitations
regarding
confidentiality

Met desired effect?

Listening back, it
sounded a bit
awkward. Im sure
over time, it would
flow a little more
easily.

Client: No, I think were good

Establishing
boundaries and
providing
permission to talk.

Invite client to tell

her story and letting
her know that Im
ready to listen

Yes

Paraphrasing

Expressing the
meaning of the
clients statement,
establishing early
on that I am

Partially. I may
have reflected back
stronger feelings
than she was
coming with.

Helper: Okay, great. So we

have about 15 minutes to talk
today. What is it that you
would like to talk with me
about?
Client: Lately, Ive been feeling
really overwhelmed between
working and schoolwork and
Im feeling like I dont have a
lot of time for myself.

listening and trying

to reflect the
strength of her
feelings to get an
idea of how to
proceed.

However, this did

help me identify
how strong her
feelings were and
therefore adapt.

Paraphrasing and
reflecting feelings

Trying to clarify and

synthesize the crux
of her message.

Yes

Open ended
question and
invitation to share
more information

Encouraging client
to elaborate or add
more without
limiting the current
conversation. I
could also tell that
she was a bit more
reserved and
wanted to
encourage her to
talk.
Encouraging but
also getting a feel
for what the client
has tried so far to
rectify the situation.

Yes

Helper: Yeah, so youre feeling

the time crunch of all of the
things on your plate. It sounds
like its weighing pretty heavily
on you.
C: Yeah, I would say that. I
would just really like to be able
to balance everything out a
little bit more and just be able
to do some of the things that I
love doing, that I just feel like I
havent been able to do lately.
H: Yeah, so you're feeling like
the work part of your life is
taking over on the fun part of
your life?
C: Exactly!
H: Yeah. Is there anything else
you want to share to help me
get a sense of what's going
on?

C: Umm. No I think I just feel

so tired at the end of the day. I
go to work and work on
reports all day, staring at a
computer screen and then I
come home and its the same
thingIm staring at a
computer screen. Then I make
dinner and go to bed. So, I
dont know, I just dont feel like
its very fun right now.
H: Yeah that does sound like a
lot. Umm what have you tried
so far.you sort of mentioned
about not feeling like you have
a balance between sort of all
of the responsibilities that you
have and just free time. What
have you tried so far to try to

Small verbal
reward,
summarizing and
asking an open
ended question to
probe, encourage
and facilitate
problem solving.

Sort of. It was a bit

awkward sounding
and if I was working
with this client for a
longer time period, I
may not have gone
to this question
quite so quickly.

improve that balance?

C: Umm I dont know if Ive
tried anything particularly. I
tried getting up earlier once to
start doing more school work,
but I was finding that really
hard because I like to sleep in
too. Umm and then I think just
with my husband and I, we try
to take turns doing the chores
so that has helped.

Paraphrasing and
summarizing

Testing the waters

to see if she might
talk more about
division of labour
which can add more
stress to people.

Yes

Ensuring she knows

I am listening and
relating.

H: Yeah that is a big help

when there's shared
responsibility with tasks in the
home environment because
sometimes we forget we have
those as well.
C: Umhum

Open ended
question

Encouraging her to
talk more and to
explore her usage
of time

Yes

Summarizing

Encouraging her to
distill her feelings of
stress and feeling
overwhelmed to see
if it is mainly due to
lack of downtime.

Yes

Problem solving
Open ended
question

Encouraging client
to reflect on what
might be done to
solve her current
problem.

Partially. Again, I
stumbled a bit on
my words, but the
general gist of my
question was on
target.

H: What are your weekends

like?
C: Umm I feel like I pretty
much just do homework, like
for school. Occasionally, I try
to get out for a walk. But
again I dont really get to do
that. Id really like to get out
more and exercise and even
just watch TV. I dont even get
to do that anymore.
H: So, yeah, it sounds like
you dont have much
downtime at all.
H: Yeah
H: So, lets um think about a
miracle question. It seems a
bit silly but sometimes it helps
us have a little bit of
perspective. If you could have
one thing solved in the
morning.so you went to bed
at night and all of a sudden
something was magically

fixed, what would you notice in

the morning would be different
to let you know that something
happened to improve your
situation?
C: Well I think I would be able
to go to work and come home
and relax.. and not feel like I
have to pull out my computer
and do my homework, like that
would be doneand then Id
have more time to spend with
my husband, go for a hike,
take my dog for a walk, even
go for a movie or something
like that.

Paraphrasing and
summarizing, and
probing.

Helping client see

that she has the
power to make
changes to improve
the situation.
Paraphrasing lets
her know Im
listening.
Summarizing helps
distill the
information to the
most important
componentthe
fact that she wants
more time to do
what she wants.

Yes

Open ended
questions, probing

Encouraging more
conversation and
keeping in touch
with the feelings
associated with her
shared concern.

summarizing, open
ended question

Relating through
humour to help reestablish level of
comfort.
Refocusing
conversation to
encourage problem
solving.

No. This was a bit

left field. Up until
this point, she had
not shared anything
about her mood. I
immediately sensed
a discomfort with
the question.
Yes. I could tell
from the last
question that I
needed to regain
back a sense of
comfort, use
humour and relate
to her.

H: So, yeah you would have

that extra time to be able to
just be with your husbanddo
things you like to do, right?
C: Yes, exactly
H: Do you think that would
help youlike how have you
been feeling mood wise?
Would that help you with your
mood?
C: UmmI feel okay, just
stressed. Im just not having
much fun as Id like. so I mean
Id like to relax more and be a
little less stressed.
H: Yeah, I can appreciate that
(laughing).even though this
is about your problemI can
appreciate that entirely. So,
umm sort of looking at the
things that you listed, like
going for walks with your dog
and doing stuff with your
husband and going to a movie.
Do you think there are any
things there that you could
actually maybe even schedule
into your day that that might
help you?

C: Yeah, I could. I think it

would be hard to schedule in
every day, but I could work on
trying to find ways even three
times a week.

Paraphrasing,
verbal rewards

Relating, showing I
am listening and
understand.
Building trust and a
relationship.

Yes

Open ended
question

Encouraging the
client to stay
focused on coming
up with a solution.

Hard to tell as the

connection was lost
and we couldnt
hear each other.

H: So it sounds like youve got

a lot on your mind and you're
feeling overwhelmed by your
workload and that's really
understandable. Youve got a
lot on your plate and its hard
to balance all of those. You did
mention earlier maybe
scheduling something a few
times a week. Can you think
of anything else that you could
do to maybe help improve that
balance of work and play?

Summarizing,
paraphrasing, open
ended question

Attempting to
summarize what we
had previously
discussed to get
back on track after
she was able to log
on again

Not really as the

connection was still
poor.

C: Im sorry, I missed that,

what did you say? (bad
connection again)

Open ended
question

Attempting to
facilitate problem
solving

Yes

H: Yeah trying to find ways to

actually plug it in even three
times a week. I find
sometimes when you take a
break you're actually more
productive, but its hard to take
those breaks.I totally
understood.
C: Yeah, yeah.
H: So, what do you think
would be a reasonable
solution of something that you
might actually try to do right
now to improve that balance?
*lost connection*

H: Is there anything that you

could do to find a better
balance between the amount
of time you have for work and
the amount of time you have

for play?
C: Well I could try to cut back
my work but I couldnt do that
too, too much, but even
getting up an hour earlier here
and there might help.

Small verbal
rewards, open
ended questions

Encouraging her to
explore options to
aid with her
attaining her goal.

Ha! I caught myself

mid sentence
asking a closed
ended question

Open ended
question

Trying to help client

understand that she
can share downtime
with her husband as
she also identified
they dont get much
time together either.

Facilitating problem
solving

Helping the client

make the
connection

In retrospect, I
would have liked to
stay talking about
her feelings when
she gets a break a
bit more. I think this
is the important
piece that she was
connecting to in the
sessiontaking
breaks seems like
work, but it might
help her in all areas.
I wish I had stayed
with that concept
longer instead of
talking about her
husband.
I wish I could have
helped facilitate it so
that she was able to
identify this instead
of me telling her.

Paraphrasing, open
ended question

Helping facilitate
problem solving

H: Yeah, of course it has to be

something that's realistic,
right?! Something that is
actually going to help improve
the situation? Do you find you
are a little more clear headed
when you go out for a walk
wait, that is a closed question,
Im going to try another
one.How do you feel when
you take a break and then go
back to work?
C: UmmI actually, I feel a lot
better when I get out, I can
think more clearly and am
better able to focus on the
work and I think its just having
that break in between. Not
just getting home from work
and going straight to the
school work. Like getting
home and going for a walk
definitely makes things better.
H: Yeah, does your husband
have a busy workload as well?

C: Umm he works full-time, 9

hour days, but gets home
around the same time as I do.
H: Yeah, might be nice if you
can both take a break between
places, like between your work
world and your school world.
C: Yeah, like if we went for a
walk together right after work

Yes, this could have

gotten us off track

or something. If we went for a

walk together.

though.

H: Yeah and get out with your

dog, get some fresh air. What
has the weather been like
where you are?
C: Its been so nice, right now.
It was plus 14 on the
weekend. When its nice
outside I want to get outside
all that much more, but its
hard.

Open ended
question, verbal
rewards

Facilitating problem
solving

Yes. Once again, I

feel like I am
feeding her a bit
with solutions to her
problem. I would
like to get better at
asking questions to
help a person solve
their problems on
their own.

Relating,
summarizing

Facilitating problem
solving

Yes. For some

reason I feel like her
guard really
dropped with this
statement and that
she was very
honest. It felt like
the conversation
really shifted here.

Relating,
summarizing

Encouraging her to
talk more

Not really. It would

have been more
effective if I had
finished with an
open ended
question.

H: Do you have a place where

you could get outside to do
some schoolwork, like on a
patio? That sounds gorgeous
at 14 degrees.
C: Yeah, actually I could do
that. We built a deck last
summer. I could bring my
laptop out there and do some
schoolwork. Thats actually a
really good idea.
H: Yeah, on a side note I did
that just the other day,
because it is that warm here
too. And ummyeah, cause I
understand that it is really
tough to balance those two
worlds. Sometimes I find even
just taking that little snippet of
time outside or just going for a
walk even a 5 k walk will get
me refreshed a bit.
C: Ummhmmmyeah I think
its just getting out. I just feel
like Im going a bit stir crazy. I
feel like I am stuck inside the
house all of the time.
H: Yeah, I can totally hear and
relate to the feelings of feeling
trapped inside. Especially with
winter and now that spring is

hereand with daylight

savings, hopefully youll be
able to get outside more often.
C: Yeah, I hope so.

Summarizing, open
ended question

Facilitating problem
solving,
encouraging
homework and a
plan for change

Yes

Closing the
conversation

Letting her know I

look forward to
hearing how it goes
next week, thanking
her for talking to
me.

Yes

H: Alright, welldo you think

there anything else at all that
you can think of that might
help you in terms of what you
said might helpyou
identifiedumm getting
outside and going for walks
outside more often, maybe
going to a movie at every now
again with your husbandyou
said maybe scheduling in
something three times a week
might help. Can you think of
anything else that you might
like to do or do you think that's
going to be a start to try for
this week to see if it improves
things a little bit for you?
C: I think its a good start for at
least now and to make sure
that it is something that I will
be able to realistically do.
H: Yeah, that sounds great. I
look forward to talking to you
next week and seeing how
things are progressing.
Thanks very much for sharing
your concerns with me today
and I will talk to you soon.
C: Thank- YOU. Bye.
H: Good-bye

Reflection
Overall, I am very pleased with my first attempt at counseling. Although there are
many areas where I could improve, I really enjoyed this activity. I was the most pleased
that my partner stated how much better she felt after our session and that she felt as
though she had been to a counselor. It is a great feeling to be able to help someone
approach a challenging time or situation with a new perspective.
There are several areas where I could improve. Mainly, due to the time
constraint of this activity and my lack of experience, I felt that I might have been overly
guiding my partner. If I had more time, I would have liked to explore her feelings on a
deeper level. In particular, I would be interested in why she was having such a hard
time carving out time for herself. Although I can fully appreciate limited free time, selfcare is an incredibly important component when you are in a helping profession. You
cant give unless you give to yourself first. I feel that I was only able to touch on the
surface of why she is having a hard time setting free time aside. However, for the
purpose of this exercise, I am sure the level of depth was appropriate.
I would also like to improve on my questioning techniques. I found I had to really
concentrate on not asking closed answer questions. I figure this will only get easier with
practice and increased awareness. Finally, one part that I found very challenging was
not talking about myself. Perhaps it was the nature of this discussion topic. However, I
had a hard time not saying, I know how you feel. I was very cognizant that this was my
partners time to talk and not about me. It made me reflect on how often I probably talk

about myself when others are sharing information about themselves. This was the
biggest piece of learning that I took away from this activity. You can relate without
making it about your own feelings.
There are a couple of areas where I surprised myself. First, I felt really
comfortable in this role. I was really pleased with the overall flow of the conversation
and listening back, I was able to see that I was actively listening to my partner. I liked
that I was able to adjust to the ebb and flow of the conversation and that I knew when to
add humour to help my partner relax.
Throughout this program, I have been asked if I would like to do counseling when
I am finished my Masters. In fact, my last supervisor encouraged me to look into
obtaining my RCC licensing. It has always been something that I have considered, but
had not yet explored. After hearing the appreciation in my partners voice at the end of
this exercise and being told how much better she felt, I am starting to consider exploring
this idea further. Although I love the assessment piece attached to school psychology, I
think counseling would be a good balance for that part of me that really loves to interact
on a more intimate level.