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A Book of AGES
a n e c c e n t r ic m i s c e l l a n y of

great & offbeat moments

in t he live s of t he famous

& infamous, age s 1 to 100

E R I C H A N S O N
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Copyright © 2008 by Eric Hanson

All rights reserved.

Published in the United States by Three Rivers Press, an imprint of the
Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.
www.crownpublishing.com

Three Rivers Press and the Tugboat design are registered

trademarks of Random House, Inc.
Originally published in hardcover in the United States by Harmony Books,
a division of Random House, Inc., New York, in 2008.

Permissions acknowledgments can be found on page 298.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Hanson, Eric.
A book of ages: an eccentric miscellany of great and offbeat moments
in the lives of the famous and infamous, ages 1 to 100 /
Eric Hanson.
1. Celebrities—Biography—Miscellanea.
2. Celebrities—Biography—Anecdotes. I. Title.
CT105.H256 2008
920.02—dc22 2008012631
ISBN 978-0-307-40902-7

Printed in the United States of America

Design by Lauren Dong

1 3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2

First Paperback Edition

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Preface

When a writer friend of mine turned thirty a few years ago,

I gave him three books, without any explanation attached: a volume of
Keats, a book of Shelley, and a small collection of stories by Stephen
Crane. The point being that each of these writers had done great things
and had died before they were thirty years old. The gift struck just the
right notes of nihilism and narcissism appropriate to the age.
In our twenties we all harbor a private belief that we will flame out
before reaching thirty. Thirty and middle age represent an annulment
of everything. Thirty is a risible age. Forty is unimaginable. People who
are forty-five were born old to begin with. Sixty is a different species;
ambition shifts to shooting one’s age at golf.
Time makes decisions for us. If we are past seven years old and are
not Mozart or Heifetz, what is the point of practicing an instrument at
all? Writing careers that do not vault immediately into glowing reviews
in the New York Times are humdrum. Everybody is writing a shallow
intelligent novel at twenty-one. Everybody has a garage band in their
thirties. As we age, we pass the time by keeping score.
Chronology has always fascinated me. The measure of our days.
Career stats. Great moments. Crossed paths. Generational chasms and
rivalries. Time is an accumulation of facts and moments. The way these
moments resonate off each other comprises the plot, such as it is, of
everyday life. Consider synchronicity: Did you know, for instance, that
Shakespeare and Cervantes died on the very same day in 1616? Or that
Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln were born on the same day in
1812? (Nobody in my eighth-grade English class knew, or cared, but I
did.) Even ordinary lives are full of significant moments. Even the great
stub their toes and fall down stairs.

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viii / Preface

Around the time my own first novel wasn’t being published, this
too-clever gift of Keats and Shelley and Crane gave me an idea. I began
collecting data and writing it down. Who had done what in their tenth,
their eleventh, their twentieth, their thirty-ninth year? I scribbled notes
in the margins of articles I was writing, on the endpapers of books I was
reading. The fragments of other writers’ lives, but not only writers’.
Lives of artists, composers, boxers, and quarterbacks, all the celebrated
dead, accumulated like a kind of poetry. As I assembled the entries year
by year, it seemed as if they were all swimming together in the same
stream. That was the point.
I began by going through the standard literary references. I read
diaries and collected letters. I read biographies. I bought a dictionary of
biographies and books of obituaries. I clipped obits from the papers. I
took notes. My favorite sources of all were the various anthologies of
anecdotes—sports, political, military, literary, royal, theatrical. Often
it isn’t the accomplishments that define a life, but the stories people tell
about their contemporaries, the gossip and the scandal.
Years passed and my collection grew, and as it grew a curious thing
happened: the entries and the people in them developed a conversation
among themselves. Juxtaposed lives began commenting on one
another. What intrigues me is the simple fact of people doing things or
not doing them, succeeding and failing, living forever and dying
young—not along some infinite timeline but simultaneously, as if
everybody who ever lived were a contemporary and lived cheek by
jowl.
In a way, I am there with them, as are we all, in our own years of
life, looking backward, looking forward, not as young as the phenome-
nal Mozart or as old as Noah. This book is the product of more than a
decade of reading and sorting and writing things down. I suggest you
do what everyone else will do—that is, turn to the age that you are
now. After that you are on your own. Leaf through it at random. Look
at the year that you remember most vividly. Or start at the beginning.
Even as crowded and selective a canvas as this one does have a plot to it.
Jot your own story in the margin.
E RIC H ANSON

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One
}
Parents who want a fresh point of view on their furniture are
advised to drop down on all fours and accompany the nine or
ten month old on his rounds. It is probably many years since
you last studied the underside of a dining room chair. The ten
month old will study this marvel with as much concentration
and reverence as a tourist in the Cathedral of Chartres.
—Selma H. Fraiberg, The Magic Years (1959)

When his father is banished, Prince Philip of Greece arrives in

England in a crib made out of an orange crate, 1922.
Giuseppe Bonanno, “Joe Bananas,” moves with his parents from
Sicily to Brooklyn, where his father opens a restaurant, 1906.
Christopher Robin Milne receives a stuffed bear for his birthday,
August 21, 1921. He gets a stuffed donkey for Christmas. Christopher
also has a small stuffed pig, a gift from a neighbor.
Seabiscuit loses his seventeenth race in a row, June 1935. Although
he’s just passed his first birthday, he’s listed as a two-year-old.
Helen Keller can see and hear as well as any child until the age of
one year and seven months, but then suddenly loses both senses, prob-
ably as a result of meningitis or scarlet fever, 1882. She reacts with rages
and tantrums.

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Ten
}
I would there were no age between ten and three-and-twenty,
or that youth would sleep out the rest; for there is nothing in
the between but getting wenches with child, wronging the
ancientry, stealing, fighting.
—William Shakespeare, The Winter’s Tale (1610)

George Gordon becomes Lord Byron, 1798.

Peter the Great becomes tsar, 1682.
C hristopher Robin Milne leaves the nursery and goes to school at
Boxgrove, in 1930, then at Stowe. The other boys mock him, chanting:
“Hush, hush, whisper who dares! Christopher Robin is saying his
prayers!”
M artin Luther King Jr. sings in a boys’ choir at the premiere of
Gone with the Wind in Atlanta, December 1939.
A lbert Einstein enrolls at Luitpold Gymnasium, 1888. He barely
speaks and is considered dull by everyone, probably because he prefers
mathematics and philosophy to the school’s Latin and Greek. In his
free time he plays the violin and enjoys building enormous houses of
cards.
Ingmar Bergman trades a hundred toy soldiers for a cinematograph,
which was his brother Dag’s Christmas present from Aunt Anna, 1929.
X erox inventor Chester Carlson’s favorite possession is a toy type-
writer, 1916.
C lare Boothe is understudy to Mary Pickford on Broadway, 1913.

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Twenty
}
What is love? ’tis not hereafter;
Present mirth hath present laughter;
What’s to come is still unsure;
In delay there lies no plenty;
Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty,
Youth’s a stuff will not endure.
—William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night (1600)

Bob Dylan writes “Blowin’ in the Wind,” 1962.

Clyde Barrow meets Bonnie Parker, 1930.
Norma Jeane Baker signs a $125-a-week contract with Twentieth
Century–Fox, dyes her hair blond, and changes her name to Marilyn
Monroe, 1946.
While a student at Smith, Sylvia Plath takes an internship at Made-
moiselle magazine, 1953. When she doesn’t get into a writing seminar
at Harvard, she has a nervous breakdown and attempts suicide.
R udolf Nureyev is invited to join the Kirov Ballet, 1958.
Frédéric Chopin leaves Warsaw for Vienna, never to return, 1830.
In his luggage is a container of Polish soil that will be buried with him
nineteen years later.
Days before his twenty-first birthday, the poet Robert Graves is serv-
ing on the Western Front with the Royal Welch Fusiliers, when he is
gravely wounded by an exploding shell, July 1916. While he is recovering
in the hospital, his parents are mistakenly informed of his death and receive
his personal belongings. His obituary appears in the Times (of London).

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Thirty
}
Thirty—the promise of a decade of loneliness, a thinning list
of single men to know, a thinning brief-case of enthusiasm,
thinning hair.
—F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (1925)

Saul of Tarsus has a change of heart on the road to Damascus, a.d. 35.
He sets out from Jerusalem with orders from the high priest to arrest
the Christians living in Damascus, but along the way God speaks to
him out of a thunderstorm. Saul becomes a Christian and changes his
name to Paul.

Mathematician John Forbes Nash begins experiencing “mental dis-

turbances,” 1959. He will resign his faculty position at MIT, spend
fifty days as a patient at the McLean Hospital, and travel to Europe to
seek refugee status there.

Joni Mitchell’s “Help Me” climbs to number seven on the Ameri-

can pop charts, 1974.

Benjamin Franklin organizes a volunteer fire department, 1736.

A fter touring Europe as principal dancer in Porgy and Bess, Maya
Angelou is working in Hollywood as a nightclub singer and living in
Laurel Canyon, 1958. In June, Billie Holiday is a houseguest for most
of a week.

Che Guevara has his picture taken by Cuban photographer Alberto

Korda, 1960. After Guevara’s death in 1967, the photograph will
become an icon, appearing on millions of T-shirts around the world.

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f orty
}
I am in my prime.
—Muriel Spark, The Prime of
Miss Jean Brodie (1961)

On December 8, 1980, John Lennon has a session with Rolling

Stone photographer Annie Leibovitz. The most famous image is of
John nude and in the fetal position embracing Yoko, who is fully
clothed. That evening, as he is leaving the Dakota Apartments, he is
shot dead by a deranged fan.
A ndy Warhol predicts, “In the future everybody will be world
famous for fifteen minutes,” 1968.
K ahlil Gibran writes The Prophet, 1923.
A fter his father’s death in 1896, Sigmund Freud begins collecting
knickknacks. The small statues, totems, and fetishes soon cover the top
of his desk and begin accumulating on the shelves and walls of his
office.
Charles Schulz’s book of Peanuts platitudes, Happiness Is a Warm
Puppy, tops the best-seller list in 1963. Another Schulz book is num-
ber two. A JFK biography is third.
William F. Buckley starts his long-running interview program Fir-
ing Line on WOR-TV in New York, 1966. The object is to invite lib-
eral intellectuals on and subject them to the slow torture of long words
and batted eyelids.
Josephine Baker receives a medal for her work with the French
Resistance, 1946.

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f if ty
}
There is a tide in the affairs of men,
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
—William Shakespeare, Julius Caesar (1599)

Julius Caesar crosses the Rubicon, 49 B.C.

Diplomat, presidential muse, and bon vivant Henry Kissinger tells
the New York Times that “power is the ultimate aphrodisiac,” 1973. It is
a busy year for Kissinger. Besides dating actresses, he has negotiated an
end to the Yom Kippur War between Israel and her neighbors, engi-
neered a bloody overthrow of the elected government of Chile, and
won the Nobel Peace Prize.

Leonardo da Vinci is employed as a military engineer for Cesare

Borgia, 1502.

Gustav Mahler has only a year left to live when he consults fellow
Viennese Sigmund Freud about “a little problem,” 1910. Freud deter-
mines that the composer’s impotence is caused by a mother fixation,
which dovetails neatly with Mrs. Mahler’s father complex.

Pol Pot’s army takes power in Cambodia, 1975. Within a year his
government will begin its program of violent reforms, abolishing cur-
rency, religion, and private property. Millions will be forced from the
cities to work in the fields. A Western journalist who has met Pol Pot
describes him as “elegant, with a pleasing smile and delicate, alert eyes.”

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Sixty
}
The world is the house of the strong. I shall not know until the
end what I have lost or won in this place, in this vast
gambling den where I have spent more than sixty years, dice-
box in hand, shaking the dice.
—Denis Diderot, Elements of Physiology
(1774–80)

Giacomo Casanova retires from swordsmanship and takes a job as a

librarian at Castle Dux in Bohemia, 1785.
Mick Jagger is knighted by Queen Elizabeth II, 2003.
Samuel Pepys writes a letter to Isaac Newton asking for mathematical
advice on how to bet safely on a dice game, 1693.
Three days after his sixtieth birthday, Groucho Marx premieres You
Bet Your Life on television, 1950.
Frank Sinatra is photographed with known mobsters, 1976.
Henry Ford begins collecting antiques, 1923. Not only furniture
but the very finest furniture, in bulk, and household items, and antique
houses to put the antiques in. He actually buys historic houses and has
them taken apart and reassembled in Dearborn, Michigan.
E. B. White publishes The Elements of Style, 1959. It’s a modest
improvement upon a little book written by William Strunk Jr., who
taught White years earlier at Cornell. The first Strunk and White edi-
tion will sell two million copies.
Paul Robeson performs to a packed house at Carnegie Hall, 1958. It
is his first New York appearance in ten years.

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Seventy
}
If you find that you can’t make seventy by any but an uncom-
fortable road, don’t you go. When they take off the Pullman
and retire you to the rancid smoker, put off your things, count
your checks, and get out at the first way station where there’s a
cemetery.
—Mark Twain (1835–1910)

Long-range photos taken of Greta Garbo swimming seminude

appear in People magazine, 1976. The retired actress is still quite svelte.
Noël Coward celebrates his birthday with a royal visit, an evening at
the theater, a film retrospective, a television documentary, an author-
ized biography, and a special dinner at the Savoy, 1969. The knight-
hood arrives next, in the New Year’s Honours List.
R eclusive bazillionaire Howard Hughes is living on the top floor of
the hotel he owns in Las Vegas, 1975. He is pathologically afraid of
germs and addicted to codeine and other painkillers; his hair is uncut
and his fingernails are several inches long; and he wears tissue boxes for
shoes. Within a few months he will be dead, leaving a confused estate
that lawyers will grow wealthy fighting over.
President and former Supreme Allied Commander in Europe
Dwight D. Eisenhower leaves office in 1961, but not before deliv-
ering a grave warning about the new “military industrial complex” that
he believes holds far too much power in Washington.
Casey Stengel is fired by the Yankees after losing the 1960 World
Series. In eleven years he led the team to nine World Series, and the

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Eighty
}
Can’t you see I’m dreaming?
In a dream you are never eighty.
—Anne Sexton, “Old” (1928–74)

Poet Marianne Moore throws out the first ball at the Yankees
opener, 1968.
Beat novelist William S. Burroughs does a television commercial
for Nike, 1994.
Queen Elizabeth II has outlasted four Archbishops of Canterbury,
2006.
In January 2000 a portrait of author Doris Lessing is hung in the
National Portrait Gallery in London. The government offers to make
her a Dame of the British Empire, but she refuses on the grounds there
isn’t a British Empire anymore. She says being “a dame” is “a bit pan-
tomimey” anyway.
Victor Hugo’s birthday is celebrated as a national holiday in France,
1882.
Count Leo Tolstoy rewrites his will, leaving the copyrights to all of
his books to the public, 1908. His family isn’t happy when they find
out about this. He also says he wants to be buried in the Zakaz Forest.
A lfred, Lord Tennyson writes “Crossing the Bar,” 1889.
Sigmund Freud receives birthday cards from James Joyce, Virginia
Woolf, Pablo Picasso, Albert Einstein, Albert Schweitzer, H. G. Wells,
and others, 1936.

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Ninety
}
I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are pay-
ing your annuities.
—Voltaire (1694–1778)

George Bernard Shaw celebrates his birthday by going on televi-

sion, 1946. Dublin gives him the key to the city.
Sarah gives birth to Isaac, 2040 b.c.
Bertrand Russell is interviewed by Playboy magazine, March 1963.
Julia Child gives her Cambridge, Massachusetts, kitchen to the
Smithsonian, 2002.
John D. Rockefeller Sr. loses half of his fortune in the stock market
crash of 1929. But there’s still enough Rockefeller money around to
found the Museum of Modern Art, build Rockefeller Center, restore
Colonial Williamsburg, and buy enough of Jackson Hole, Wyoming,
for a national park.
Millard Kaufman’s first novel, A Bowl of Cherries, is published by
McSweeney’s, 2007.
Frank Lloyd Wright is asked to design an opera house, two muse-
ums, and a post office in Baghdad, 1957.
The memoirist and gadfly Quentin Crisp dies, leaving behind many
charmed acquaintances, a handful of charming books, and a messy
apartment, 1999.

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One Hundred
}
I am this month one whole year older than I was this time
twelve-month; and having got . . . almost into the middle of
my fourth volume—and no farther than to my first day’s
life—’tis demonstrative that I have three hundred and sixty-
four days more life to write just now, than when I first set
out . . . write as I will . . . I shall never overtake myself . . .
At the worst I shall have one day the start of my pen—and one
day is enough for two volumes—and two volumes will be
enough for one year.
—Laurence Sterne, The Life and Opinions of
Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1759–67)

Elizabeth, the queen mother, still walks her dogs for twenty minutes
three times a day, 2000.
Comedian Bob Hope dies on July 27, 2003.
Moses is still wandering with the Jewish people in the wilderness,
1425 b.c. He will never arrive in the Promised Land, but he will see it
from a distance.
Ida May Fuller, a classmate of Calvin Coolidge and the first person
to receive Social Security in 1940, is still living in Ludlow, Vermont,
1974. She will die in 1975. In thirty-five years of retirement, her Social
Security benefits will total $22,888.92. A nice return. Miss Fuller paid
in $24.75 during the last three years of her working life. She was a life-
long Republican and never thought much of the New Deal.
Irving Berlin lives very quietly in his New York City apartment,
avoiding the public eye, 1988. He still cannot read or write music and

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296 / Eric Hanson

can only play in one key, F-sharp. He prefers playing only the black
keys.
George Burns dies on March 9, 1996. He once observed that it was
“too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy
driving taxi-cabs and cutting hair.”
In January 1967, thirty-five years after the author’s death, John
Galsworthy’s The Forsyte Saga begins its broadcast run on BBC-TV.
Despite being in black and white, it is the most expensive television
production yet made, inaugurating a whole new television format
called the miniseries. In America it is the initial selection of the pro-
gram Masterpiece Theatre on PBS.
Dr. Albert Hofmann celebrates his one hundredth birthday, 2006.
Seven decades after he invented LSD, he claims to have a remarkable
memory but makes no reference to flashbacks.

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