BAGGAGE UNATTENDED

A 10 Minute Play

by

Eric Coble

© Eric Coble Jonathan Lomma

William Morris Endeavor
1325 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10019
212-903-1552
JLomma@wmeentertainment.com
 BAGGAGE UNATTENDED

Characters:

WOMAN

MAN

UNIFORMED MAN

THREE SECURITY OFFICERS

Place:
The Departure Lounge of Columbus International Airport.

Time:
Now.
SETTING: A row of chairs in a departure lounge of
Port Columbus International Airport.

AT RISE: A MAN and WOMAN sit alone with their

carry-on luggage.
They stare at a lone black rollcart bag
sitting peacefully Down Center.
A few moments of silence.

WOMAN
Is he coming back, do you think?

MAN
He just left.

WOMAN
Not just left. That was three minutes ago.

MAN
Yeah, but he'll be back in a second.

(Pause)

WOMAN
This isn't right. You don't leave your bag unattended. They
specifically ask you if your bag has been out of your control
at any time-

MAN
Right.

WOMAN
Well, this is pretty out of his control. How's he gonna
answer the question now? He's gotta tell the truth-

MAN
He's probably already answered the question back at the check-
in. They won't ask again.

WOMAN
So he gets off scott-free. Total irresponsibility. He's
just asking to have something happen to his bag.
(Beat.)
I mean, how does he know we're not terrorists waiting to
plant a bomb in his suitcase-

MAN
Maybe he's a trusting soul. The last one on earth.
 2.

WOMAN
Believes in the goodness of humankind?

MAN
Exactly.

WOMAN
There's a reason their kind is going extinct, you know.
(Pause. Then she collects her bag and magazine)
I'm going to move. Do you want to move?

MAN
Why?

(The woman looks at the bag)

MAN (CONT'D)
It's just a bag, sweetheart.

WOMAN
Then why did he leave it?

MAN
He went down the hallway -- probably to the bathroom-

WOMAN
He was walking quickly, wasn't he?

MAN
I don't know. I wasn't paying that close attention-

WOMAN
There's only one reason to walk quickly away from a bag-

MAN
I've been known to walk quickly to the bathroom on occasion-

WOMAN
Did you leave a suitcase behind?

MAN
No.

WOMAN
Let's move.

MAN
Maybe he's forgetful! Maybe he has early Alzheimer's or he's
distracted because his wife just went into the hospital and
he's racing back to her -- there's dozens of reasons he might
leave without his bag.
 3.

WOMAN
Then why is he not coming back?

MAN
I've been known to spend more than three minutes in the
bathroom on occasion-

WOMAN
Come on. Please. Let's just sit over there.

MAN
Our flight's going to be boarding in a few minutes.

WOMAN
So we'll move back-

MAN
I'm not running all over the airport because of a lonely
suitcase.

WOMAN
I'm not asking you to run all over -- just over there. By
the McDonald's.

MAN
You think the McDonald's is going to protect you?

WOMAN
Please?

MAN
If I'm going to die, I want to go with my dignity -- not
covered with fry grease and Chicken McNuggets.

WOMAN
Fine.
(She sits down... then stands)
I'm going to tell the girl at the counter.

MAN
They'll take his bag away!

WOMAN
Exactly! They have laws about this!

MAN
There's no law about leaving a suitcase in front of a chair
at the airport-

WOMAN
There are laws against planting bombs!
 4.

MAN
And do we know that's a bomb? The odds are -- the greatest
chances, way over 90%, I'd say -- are that that's a bag of
shirts, shaving stuff, and old underwear.

WOMAN
And you're willing to take that chance?

MAN
I am.

WOMAN
What kind of shaving stuff? Like a straight razor?

MAN
For God's sake, calm down!

ANNOUNCEMENT ON THE P.A.

Attention, all passengers. In the interest of security,
please do not leave your baggage unattended. Unattended
luggage is subject to search and seizure by police. Thank
you.

WOMAN
You see?

MAN
That's not a law.

WOMAN
It should be.

MAN
Why would he want to blow up Gate B-6?

WOMAN
Maybe he hates Columbus.

MAN
What's to hate in Columbus?

WOMAN
We're the heartland, Marty. If you want to strike terror in
the mind of a nation, you drive a knife right into it's
heartland. Don't you know anything?

MAN
When'd you start talking like the Fox News Channel?

WOMAN
This isn't funny.
 5.

MAN
No, it isn't -- you're talking about seizing some innocent
man's baggage just because you're getting a little scared-

WOMAN
These are scary times, Marty. The sooner you open your eyes
to that, the better.

MAN
The guy didn't look like a terrorist!

WOMAN
He didn't? And who are you, Tom Clancey?

MAN
You know what I mean. He didn't look... foreign.

WOMAN
Like an Arab.

MAN
Well, yeah, I mean, not to single them out -- there are a lot
of good Arab... /Americans. But he didn't look like them.
Good or bad.

WOMAN
You said you weren't paying attention.

MAN
I glanced at him. He seemed normal.

WOMAN
Normal. You mean white?

MAN
Well... I mean... not that all white people are normal.

WOMAN
Timothy McVeigh. The Unabomber. Did they look "normal"?

MAN
This guy didn't look like them!

WOMAN
The next one never will! It's not how they look, it's how
they behave. And this...
(Gesturing to the bag)
...strikes me as suspicious behavior!

MAN
I'm not flying with you anymore. This is too much.
 6.

WOMAN
(Grabs the man's arm)
Listen! Did you hear that?

MAN
What.

WOMAN
A click. The bag just made a clicking sound.

MAN
I didn't hear anything.

WOMAN
Oh my god oh my god oh my god-

MAN
It wasn't the bag -- you were hearing something else-

WOMAN
It came from the bag, Marty. "Click". Like a... a clock or
something...

MAN
Clocks don't go "tick" loud enough to hear them through a
bag. And bombs don't go "tick". You watch too many
Roadrunner cartoons-

WOMAN
I distinctly heard something coming from the bag.

(Pause)

MAN
(Looking around)
He has been gone a long time, hasn't he?

WOMAN
You see? You see? I'm calling security-

MAN
No.

WOMAN
Why not?

MAN
He'll be back any second and I don't want to be the one to
tell him we got his bag destroyed.

WOMAN
So you'd put his well-being ahead of our own.
 7.

MAN
I don't think it's an either/or thing, Georgie-

WOMAN
I can't believe you're willing to harbor a terrorist!

MAN
What??

WOMAN
Making up excuses for him -- "maybe his wife's in the
hospital" -- and maybe his wife's at another airport right
this second leaving another black bag in front of another
couple set to detonate in five more seconds!

MAN
Are you listening to what you're saying?

WOMAN
Are you?? I can't believe at a time like this you're siding
with them!

MAN
I'm not siding with anyone -- I just don't want to live in
some bad movie-of-the-week-

WOMAN
Too late, Marty. Look around you! The good guys, the bad
guys -- T.V. writers couldn't make it any clearer -- if
you're not willing to accept that... then maybe you should
just... get out.

MAN
What are you talking about??

WOMAN
I thought I knew you better than this.

MAN
So did I.

WOMAN
I'm moving. If you want to die, you're going to have to do
it alone.

MAN
Oh, for God's sake, Georgie! You want proof, I'll give you
proof!
(He moves for the bag)
I'm gonna open up this bag and I'm gonna shove every single
pair of innocent dirty socks and underwear in your paranoid
little face!!
 8.

WOMAN
(Pulling him back)
No!!

MAN
You want to see the truth -- let's get to the truth!!

WOMAN
You're gonna set it off!!

MAN
Fine! Hell can't be any worse than you sitting here spouting
this bull-

(They're on the floor now -- wrestling beside

the suitcase...)

(A MAN IN AN AIRLINE UNIFORM walks up to them)

UNIFORMED MAN
Excuse me.
(They stop.)
Is this your bag?

WOMAN
No!!

MAN
Yes!!

(Pause)

UNIFORMED MAN
Is it or isn't it?

WOMAN
Some guy just left it here-

MAN
It's ours, I was just going to open it to show my wife
something-

UNIFORMED MAN
(To Woman)
Why don't you want him to open the bag, ma'am?

WOMAN
Because there's a bomb in there!

(Pause. They all look at each other)

MAN
No, there's not. No bomb.
 9.

(The uniformed man pulls a walkie-talkie from

his belt)

UNIFORMED MAN
(Quietly into his walkie-talkie)
We have a Code Yellow at B-6. Code Yellow at B-6.

MAN AND WOMAN

(To each other)
You see what you did??

WOMAN
Code yellow -- what's a code yellow??

MAN
It's just clothes, sir, there's gotta be just clothes in
there-

(THREE SECURITY OFFICERS charge on -- two

grabbing the man and woman. The third waves
everyone else back, pulling a cordon rope around
the bag -- all of them speaking quietly and
urgently into their walkie-talkies...)

WOMAN
What are you doing?

SECURITY GUARD #1
Come with us, ma'am.

WOMAN
We're innocent! I'm an innocent bystander -- he's the one-

MAN
She's the one thinks it's a bomb -- I'm being rational! I'm
rational!!

(And they're dragged off-stage, yelling.

The security guards pull back -- barking into
their walkie-talkies...
And the stage is empty.
Except for the lone black bag sitting patiently
on the floor, now cordoned off in a little rope
prison...
And the two bags left behind by the man and
woman.
Pause.
A "Click" sound...
From one of the bags?)

(Then Blackout.)

END OF PLAY