Copyright 2009 Carolyn Gage

Thanksgiving Day Sermon

from The Lesbian Tent Revival

Thanksgiving is a national holiday to celebrate a dinner party that white

colonizers held in collaboration with their native hosts, shortly before
they turned around and murdered their hosts so they could take over
their property.

We know this, sisters, because we are synapsing. We can look at what

we are told is our history, and we can look at who wrote it, and why they
wrote it, and we can go looking for who didn’t get to write that history,
and why, and we can find out what their truth is, and we can make
connections around all of this and figure out for ourselves what’s a truth
and what’s a lie. And we can connect with our deep selves and so, even
if the truth looks like it could hurt us, we can know that we are Sisters of
the Sacred Synapse and that we have a spiritual obligation to the planet
to know what we know and to challenge the lies, make the amends, and
keep telling the truth, convenient or not.

And when Sister Carolyn thinks about Thanksgiving and about what she
is grateful for, she is grateful—grateful!—for the fact that she cannot
participate in or enjoy a ton of things in this culture. She is grateful that
she cannot laugh at the stereotypes, that she cannot wave the flag of
patriotism when it means supporting an immoral invasion and a war of
corporate, imperial aggression and greed. She is grateful that she
cannot participate in the ongoing carnival and parade of women’s
increasingly sexualized fashions. She is grateful that she does not enjoy
the thousands of DVD’s that celebrate the violence and dominance of
men on this planet, that she does not enjoy any story where the terror of

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women or of children is a plot point. She is grateful that she notices the
gender roles and that what she knows about their toxicity undermines
mainstream romance narratives. She is grateful that she notices the
absence of the disabled, the old, the lesbian, the women of color. And
she notices the pedophilia. And she is eternally grateful that she
understands with every neuron in her brain that pornography is the
sexually explicit subordination of women.

Sister Carolyn is grateful, sisters, grateful for what the dominant culture
sneeringly calls “political correctness.” This is a nasty phrase, sisters. It
is a nasty phrase for what is actually “Optimal Synaptic Functioning.”
“Optimal Synaptic Functioning” means you are fully alive—not
repressing, not denying—using your magnificent brain as it was
intended to be used—and that you are connecting with other forms of
life in a way that is conscientious and symbiotic! Let’s all say that:
“Optimal Synaptic Functioning.” It means being at the very top of one’s
game.

Let’s look at this “political correctness” thing: “Correct” means “free from
error; in accordance with fact or truth.” That sounds good, doesn’t it?
But what happens when we pair it with “political?” Well, “political” has a
lot of different meanings, and most of them are suspicious. In the
nastiest sense, it means doing something you don’t really mean, but
doing it to manipulate yourself into a position of power. Like doing right
thinking for wrong reasons. I just want to ask you this: What the hell
does that mean? How can you think right for wrong reasons? I mean,
really, deeply think right… but for wrong reasons? Sisters, I just can’t
make that synaptic connection.

But the people who are doing the naming are not synapsing optimally.
They are only concerned about their own positions. They know that the
people who point out the obvious discrimination and racism and ageism
and ableism and sexism and homophobia and anti-Semitism and

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classism of the dominant culture make them feel defensive. And

because they are feeling defensive, they experience the optimal
synapser as pulling a power play, being a political manipulator. And so
they label us “politically correct,” and sneer when they do it.

Well, it seems clear enough that Optimal Synaptic Functioning is the

way to go… so why doesn’t everyone practice it? Why is the world
divided into those who do, and those who sneer at it? Well, sisters,
there are two reasons, as with most things in patriarchy. And those two
reasons come down to the carrot and the stick. That’s right… that nasty
old carrot and that nasty old stick. And they’re really not a carrot and a
stick at all. They’re really just a nasty old you-know-what. Because that
is what patriarchy is all about.

Okay. Let’s look at the stick first. The punishment for Optimal Synaptic
Functioning. What is it? It is shame, my sisters. Shame. They try to
make us ashamed, or embarrassed about our magnificent synaptic
abilities. How can they do this? How can it be better to be numb, selfish,
and disconnected? Well, the answer to that is simple: It’s not. But
shame is not about logic. Shame is about the herd, sisters. And never
forget that we are animals. We are primates. And primates are social
animals, like horses or dogs. We are not like cats. We like to travel in
packs. We feel tremendous anxiety when we are separated from the
herd. And when the herd is separating itself from us, we will do almost
anything to belong again.

So this social shame is a huge stick. It can be used to make us buy

things we don’t want, to make us go along with idiotic situations, to
make us keep silent about things that are immoral—and, pay attention
to this!—to keep silent even about things that are hurting us! Social
shame makes us ashamed of things we have worked very hard for…
like our ability to know the truth and to articulate it. Never underestimate
the power of social shunning and shaming!

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We need to remember that, historically, the people who protested the

most blatantly unfair, outrageous, murderous, and barbaric practices
have been called “N-word” lovers, Jewish sympathizers, and men-
haters. Sisters, it is, and always has been, a fine thing to stand up to
racial discrimination, to feel outrage and horror at anti-Semitism, and,
sisters, there is nothing wrong with telling the truth about the fact that
men are historically and globally the agents of women’s oppression. Not
all men, not all the time, but men, as a caste, globally and historically
have been the agents of our economic, political, spiritual, sexual
oppression. Nothing wrong with naming it. It seems crazy that so many
good people have been coerced into silence by the use of name-calling.
But they have. Never underestimate your biology, never underestimate
the herd instinct, and never underestimate the power of the shame
stick!

The big shame stick is a powerful enforcer of social norms. And the
name of this particular shame stick is “political correctness.” Well, let’s
get a little shame stick of our own. Let’s start finding a name for those
folks who sneer at “political correctness.” Let’s call them “empathy
impaired” or folks suffering from “Delusional Dominance Disorder.” Own
the language, sisters… Own the language! And if it is not a language
that puts you at the center of your experience, that makes you visibl to
yourself, then you are not owning it. And if you are not owning it, it may
very well be owning you.

All right… So let’s move on to the nasty old carrot: The reward. The
reward for not synapsing. What is that reward? You get to belong. You
get to partake. And that means you are welcome in the family, in the
club, in the organization, that you get to sit at the table, that you get a
piece of the pie. In fact, the more you can unplug your synapses, the
bigger the piece of pie.

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Why is that? Well, it’s about streamlining. Just like a race car. You get
rid of anything and everything that would slow you down. Everything in
the race car is designed with one goal in mind: Get there first.

And so it is in life. If you want to get the promotion first, get the most
money first, get a name for yourelf first… well, then you might consider
designing a life that gets rid of anything that would slow you down. And
you can go very fast, if you don’t care about the environment, if you
don’t care about whose backyard you are dumping your waste in, if you
don’t care about the lives of the folks overseas who are working in
substandard conditions in your factory. You can move faster if you don’t
have to consider the impact of your choices on future generations, or on
other species. And, like a race car, if you get rid of the passenger seat,
you can pick up a lot of speed. Partners and family and community will
really put a drag on your momentum.

Now, what happens if you are trying to maintain all your biophilic (and
that means “life-loving”), right-sized connections as you move through
life? What happens if you are staying connected to the web? Well, it
means you have to take other things and beings into consideration. And
that means you have to stop and solicit a lot of feedback before you
implement a major decision. That takes time and communication skills.
It requires compromise and coalition. You have to negotiate. Everything
is more complicated, because what makes money today, might deplete
resources for tomorrow. Some species you never heard of might
become endangered. There are conflicting agendas, conflicts of
interest. Turbulence, sisters. Turbulence. Resistance. All of these things
will slow you down. The woman who practices Optimal Synaptic
Functioning will never travel as far or as fast as the racer who is single-
mindedly focused on one thing and one thing only: getting there first.
That carrot of moving fast and far… it can be tempting, especially when
we are in a hurry to pay off a student loan, or a mortgage… It can be
very tempting when the dogs of low self-esteem are nipping at our heels

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and we are trying to slow them down by heaving a meaty chunk of

achievement at them. It can be tempting when we are in a hurry to
escape the rising waters of panic from a traumatic childhood and we
think we can get to safety if we can just climb a ladder of worldly
success quickly enough. Lots of temptations. I know. Sister Carolyn has
been in a hurry, a big hurry. But, sisters, the patriarchal race is not
worth winning. It’s a boondoggle. And the definition of “boondoggle” is
“work or activity that is wasteful or pointless but gives the appearance of
having value.” The patriarchal race is a boondoggle.

The Optimal Synapser has another definition of winning. It’s about

retaining her biophilic (that’s life-loving) integrity. When we retain our
biophilic integrity, we are advocating for the integrity of the planet.
When we retain our biophilic integrity—and how do we do that?
SYNAPSING!—when we retain this biophilic integrity, we may spend
our lives moving forward by millimeters, but we are bringing along
everyone and every part of ourselves when we do, for every single
millimeter that we travel. When we get somewhere with our biophilic
integrity intact, ALL of us get there. The speed racer, when she gets
somewhere, only part of her arrives. The racetrack is littered with
chunks of herself that she had to jettison for the sake of speed. And it
goes without saying, she travels alone.

Sisters, we are in a nation here that has become a speed racer. And
this nation has lost its soul, lost its respect in the international
community, lost its credit rating. This nation has left so many things
behind in the rush to be first, well… Sisters, it feels pretty soulless. And
we’re not first anymore. It’s been a boondoggle.

Now, we know some words. We know “politically correct.” And we know

that for the manipulation that it is. And we know “empathy challenged”
or “Delusional Dominance Disorder,” which are the real problem. And
we know “boondoggle,” which is believing that it is possible to advance

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individually. Sisters, that’s not possible, because everything is

connected! So now, I want us all to try to think of a new word, a brand
new word that has never been spoken before, to describe that physical
and emotional state of well-being we have when we are retaining our
biophilic integrity. Let’s just take a minute, and when you’ve got one just
shout it out…

Now, we’ve got some great new words. You pick one that works for
you, and you memorize that. And then think about it at least three times
a day. What does it feel like? When was the last time you felt it? What
might you do right now, in this instant, that might promote your
shamantic, webtastic, biophilic integrity?

Sisters, NEVER be ashamed of synapsing fully. NEVER EVER. The

planet is too near destruction for that luxury. The synapse is a
sacrament. We have an obligation to practice it, and practice it as if our
lives depended on it. You can never synapse too much, and this is
especially true when we are talking about oppression. The synapse is
what? A privilege, a prerogative, and an obligation!

Be grateful you understand the huge lie of Thanksgiving Day. It is really

Ingratitude Day on a scale that boggles the mind. What we need is a
Colonizers’ Day of Amends, where the Native Americans are honored
and the ongoing privilege of the invaders and their descendants are
interrogated AND where the ongoing post-traumatic stress disorder—
the PTSD—from generations of genocide, of displacement, of poverty,
of the horror of the compulsory Indian boarding schools, of alcoholism
are acknowledged and where we all, individually and as a nation, take
the steps to be accountable.

Be grateful for all the holidays we cannot take at face value, because of
our Optimal Synapsing. Be grateful that we know, when we look at
Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day that we are never allowed to include

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the women who are veterans and survivors of the war of violence and
terrorism by men against women. Be grateful that we bring all our
synapses to the table when we consider war, because it is a
complicated issue. Be grateful that we can remember how the founder
of Mother’s Day, Anna Jarvis, intended for it to be a holiday that was
politically radical and feminist, and how she turned against her own
holiday and called for a national boycott of Mother’s Day, when she saw
how it was being sentimentalized for commercial purposes. We can
boycott or radicalize it ourselves.

Be grateful that we understand how the national celebrations and

mainstream commercializing of christian holidays marginalize other
religious traditions. Be grateful that we understand what it means to
ritually worship the birth of a male baby in a world where female
infanticide is epidemic. Be grateful that we understand what it means
when the so-called mother of God was given no choice about the
conception. We can be grateful that we notice why there is no national
holiday about women, except the one sentimentalizing us as mothers.
We can notice that there is no holiday celebrating the sacredness of the
girl baby and her relationship to the Goddess.

Be grateful that we can have our own holidays. That we can celebrate
the seasons of nature, that we can gift ourselves with our own
understanding of what deserves commemoration. And right now, let’s
see if we can think of three national holidays that have to do with
women… Birthdays of famous women, or historic moments in our
liberation movement. Really think about this… Because if we can’t think
of the women who should have days named in their honor, we will be
stuck with the holidays we have… and these are holidays that celebrate
an enslaver, and another white man who dragged his heels about
ending slavery, and a European who was a mass murderer and
enslaver.

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Every single one of us should have about six names of women we want
to honor and celebrate nationally. And, sisters, if you are struggling with
those names, don’t be ashamed. The patriarchy doesn’t want you to
know these names. It doesn’t want you to know your history or to have
role models that empower women. It’s no accident or character failing if
you can’t reel off the names of these women as easily as you can
“George Washington” or “Christopher Columbus.” So here is your
homework: Six names. Six holidays. Get out your calendar and make
their birthdays. And then find a way to share and celebrate. This is how
men empower themselves, sisters. We’ve got to synapse around that.
We have to make sure we have our own holidays. These are our days
of commemoration and celebration! And, sisters, this second week in
August, commemorating the founding of the Michigan Womyn’s Music
Festival, is my season of high holy days!

Now… there is a high price to pay for Optimal Synaptic Functioning. In

terms of the dominant culture, the Optimal Synapser is seen as one
great big, huge, all-encompassing wet blanket. That’s right sisters. We
are all seen as wet blankets, sometimes even by those who love us. Let
us not be ashamed or afraid of that. Let us embrace our wet
blankethood. Wet blankets can send smoke signals. Wet blankets can
be used to communicate across great distances without the use of
technology.

Optimal Synaptic Functioning prevents us from participating in the

values and distractions of the dominant culture, but what it does, is
connect us with our deep truth, with all life on the planet, and especially
the forms of life who need our advocacy the most. There is joy and
purpose in this, sisters. Can you say that? “Joy” and “purpose.” There is
no joy or purpose in the dominant culture. The dominant culture can
only offer superficial stimulation that folks are conditioned to find
pleasurable in a cut-off way. What it offers, sisters, is distraction. Why
distraction? So we will not notice the devastation that is going on all

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around us. But we, my Sisters of the Sacred Synapse, we have joy and
purpose, and we can face the truth, because we are facing it with each
other.

The agents of patriarchal oppression do everything they can to try to

keep us from expressing this joy or enacting this purpose, and that is a
torment, sisters… yes, it is. Sister Carolyn knows it is. And sometimes,
with all the obstacles, there is a temptation to fall into S.I.N., those
Synaptically Inadequate Networks, those torn webs, that the dominant
culture is so fond of. And sometimes those torn webs of dissociation
and distraction can be seductive. They can be a temptation, sisters.
Yes, they can be a mighty temptation, when we are tired, or when we
want so keenly to socialize with folks who are not synapsing, which is
the majority of folks. And sometimes we do fall into S.I.N. And
sometimes it feels good. It feels like a break, or a timeout.

But watch out, sisters! Watch out! When we turn off our brain enough to
overlook the racism, the classism, the gender roles, etc. etc., we are
training our brain. Yes, we are. We are training our brains to unplug for
the sake of what? For the sake of the laugh track. For the sake of
sociability. And maybe we can afford to do that when the dominant
culture is making fun of someone else’s oppression, when it is
dismissing the needs of a group that’s not our own. But what happens
when the herd decides that our oppression is the joke, the thing to be
made invisible? What happens when we try to form alliances with those
people we have been trained to tune out? Synapsing is like a muscle,
sisters. Use it or lose it. If you unplug your brain every night to enjoy
dominant culture television or to lose yourself in male dominant culture
romantic fiction… well… how does that affect you when you try to plug
yourself back in?

Sisters, I am not telling you what to do, because I don’t want that
responsibility. But patriarchy is a force, sisters… yes, it is. It is a force

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like a moving train. Just because you’re on it, you’re traveling, whether
your feet are moving or not. Get off the train, plug in the brain, get that
new vocabulary, those new holidays working to describe what’s real
and what’s healthy and what’s sacred. Sisters, our lives are sacred. All
the time. All the time sacred. Not when you stop working. Not when you
have time for it. Our lives are sacred. Our synapses are sacred. Know
what you know, sisters. Communicate with respect, but with truth. And
do not be afraid of political correctness. Embrace your Optimal Synaptic
Functioning. Give thanks for it!

Blessed be!

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