REFUGE RECOVERY a good option.

Having a trusted guide who understands

PROCESS
your specific addictive behaviors is invaluable.

Read the chapter on “Intention” in the Refuge Recovery

ADDICTION
book. This lays the foundation for your work on defining
your recovery process. Wise intention has three
components: non-harming, renunciation, and goodwill.
Each of these components requires us to engage in
particular tasks that will help us define what “recovery”
will mean to us.

From the book Refuge Recovery:

IDENTIFYING HARMFUL BEHAVIOR
“Addiction is the repetitive process of
(NON-HARMING)
habitually satisfying cravings to avoid,
change or control the seemingly unbearable
conditions of the present moment. This process
of craving and indulgence provides short-term Make a list of all of Once you have This is a very
relief but causes long-term harm. It is almost your behaviors that identified your individual process;
are harmful. Take harmful behaviors, be honest with
always a source of suffering for both the addict an honest look the next step is yourself about
and those who care about the addict.” at the behaviors
that cause harm
to rank them on a
scale of 1–10, with
which behaviors are
causing the most
to yourself and to 10 being “extremely harm in your life.
others. harmful.”
In short, a process addiction is any behavior
that we engage in to avoid, change or control
RENUNCIATION
the seemingly unbearable conditions of the
Now that you have your list of harmful behaviors
present moment. ranked, make a plan with your mentor: which are you
going to let go of first? Will you work with one behavior
We satisfy cravings in many ways. Although it at a time? Or let go of them all? Consider complete
may feel like substance abuse is the prevalent renunciation if that is possible. Some people find it
most useful to let go of the most harmful behaviors first;
form of addiction in Refuge Recovery groups, others, for whom that may not feel realistic, may choose
many of us struggle with other addictions, to start with a less harmful behavior and work their way
including food, sex, technology, gambling, up. The specifics don’t matter; what matters is that you
relationships, spending, codependency, etc. are letting go of harmful behaviors. We will want to
identify what our “bottom-line” behaviors are and begin
All are welcome in Refuge Recovery. to abstain from them.

Refuge Recovery meetings are meant to be For behaviors like sex or technology addiction, a
inclusive of all addictions. Particular meetings period of full renunciation may be wise. Remember
that using our sexual energy is a choice; it is not
may, at times, seem substance-abuse oriented, necessary for our individual survival, and periods
but please, remember: all definitions of of abstinence may at times be helpful. If you are
addiction are welcome in our program. partnered and complete celibacy is not a realistic
choice, it will be best to work with a mentor or trusted
friend to come up with skillful solutions.
DEFINING RECOVERY
For those of us with process addictions, total abstinence
GOODWILL
from all associated behaviors may not be a sustainable You’ve let go of some harmful behaviors—great! But you
goal. How we embark on the process of recovery will may still encounter difficulties as you attempt to engage
thus vary greatly for each of us, and we will certainly in balanced behavior around your eating, sexuality,
want some help along the way. Here are some ideas spending, technology use, and interactions with loved
and guidelines that may be helpful: ones. Learning to approach these difficulties with a wise
and friendly attitude—with a spirit of goodwill, kindness,
Having a mentor or like-minded person you can talk to and compassion toward yourself and others—will be
is key. It may be best to find another person who has crucial. A daily practice of loving-kindness meditation will
had success dealing with the same addictive behaviors. become your greatest ally in this endeavor. This practice
If that is not possible, a therapist or counselor could be is outlined in the back of the Refuge Recovery book.
How do we know when we’re practicing recovery from WHAT IS COMPASSION?
our process behaviors? This is a very personal question.
Many feel that their recovery process begins when Compassion is a quality of the heart that enables
they pick up the book and start working with a mentor. us to care about pain and suffering. As we train in
Others consider their recovery underway only once compassion practices, we gain the ability to choose how
they’ve begun letting go of all their harmful behaviors. we respond to pain. We aspire to meet all experience
You must choose what feels most authentic to you. with a kind and friendly attitude. We learn to meet our
pain and suffering with compassion and forgiveness.
With process addictions, the more we work with them, We begin to meet happiness and pleasure with
the more clearly we see the full extent our harmful non-attached appreciation. We come to hold all our
behaviors, which often means finding more and more experiences with equanimity, acknowledging that our
we need to let go of. Remember that this is a process; it happiness and freedom is dependent on our actions,
is your responsibility to accept guidance, be honest with not on our wishes.
yourself, let go of your harmful behaviors, and meet the
world from a place of kindness and goodwill.
FOUR HEART PRACTICES
Using the framework of the Four Truths and the inventory 1. Kindness
process, we engage in the following four tasks: 2. Compassion/Forgiveness
3. Appreciation
1. We recognize fully and honestly how our process 4. Equanimity
addictions and associated behaviors have created
difficulties in our lives. Refuge Recovery follows the traditional Buddhist model
of the Four Noble Truths:
2. We identify and thoroughly investigate the causes of
our addictive behaviors, and move toward letting go of 1. Addiction creates suffering
them. “We take stock of all the suffering we have experienced
and caused as addicts”
3. We become hopeful and optimistic about our ability
2. The cause of addiction is repetitive craving
to find freedom from these behaviors.
“We investigate the causes and conditions that lead to
4. We develop the skills necessary to free ourselves addiction and begin the process of letting go”
from our addictive behaviors through practicing ethical 3. Recovery is possible
living, meditative training, and wise understanding. “We come to understand that recovery is possible and
take refuge in the path that leads to the end of addiction”
WHAT IS BUDDHISM? 4. The path to recovery is available
“We engage in the process of the Eightfold Path that
Buddhism is a practical and applicable humanist leads to recovery”
psychology that teaches us that we all have the power
to relieve suffering through our own efforts. The core The Eightfold Path
teachings of Buddhism are the Four Noble Truths and
the Eightfold Path, in which the practices of mindfulness 1. Wise Understanding
and compassion play key roles. 2. Wise Intention
3. Wise Communication / Community
4. Wise Action
WHAT IS MINDFULNESS? 5. Wise Livelihood / Service
Mindfulness is defined as present-time, nonjudgmental, 6. Wise Effort
investigative, kind and responsive awareness. To be 7. Wise Mindfulness
mindful of the present-time experience of our thoughts, 8. Wise Concentration
intentions, and actions, we must continually train and
redirect our attention to the here and now. Mindfulness Find us on iTunes and at refugerecovery.org
teaches us to see clearly and respond wisely.

The Four Foundations of Mindfulness BUDDHA • DHARMA • SANGHA

1. Mindfulness of body/breath
2. Mindfulness of feeling tone
3. Mindfulness of mind states
4. Mindfulness of mind objects/truth