body language

how to read body language signs and gestures - non-verbal communications - male and female,
for work, social, dating, and mating relationships

Body Language is a significant aspect of modern communications and relationships.

Body Language is therefore very relevant to management and leadership, and to all aspects of
work and business where communications can be seen and physically observed among people.

Body language is also very relevant to relationships outside of work, for example in dating and
mating, and in families and parenting.

Communication includes listening. In terms of observable body language, non-verbal (non-

Body language goes both ways:

• Your own body language reveals your feelings and meanings to others.

• Other people's body language reveals their feelings and meanings to you.

The sending and receiving of body language signals happens on conscious and unconscious
levels.

Body language, and more technically the study of body language, is also known as kinesics
(pronounced 'kineesicks'), which is derived from the Greek word kinesis, meaning motion.
See also the free Body Language Quiz, which can be used to test/reinforce the learning offered
in this article.

(N.B. US and UK-English spellings, e.g., 'ize' and 'ise' are used in this page to allow for different
searching preferences. Please feel free to change these according to your local requirements
when using these materials.)

body language index

introduction and basics

body language definitions

background and history

nature or nurture?
body language and evolution

universal facial expressions

reading and analyzing body language

body language signals and meanings :-

eyes | mouth | head | arms | hands | handshakes | legs and feet | personal space

mirroring (synchronizing) body language

seating positions and arrangements

body language - examples of cultural differences

flirting, courtship, dating and mating body language - male and female

glossary - main body language terms

body language references and books

other audible signals

Body language is not an exact science.

No single body language sign is a reliable indicator.

Understanding body language involves the interpretation of several consistent signals to

Skip the background theory and history, and go straight to the body language signals and
meanings.

body language - basics an

body language - basics and introduction

Body language is a powerful concept which successful people tend to understand well.

So can you.
The study and theory of body language has become popular in recent years because
psychologists have been able to understand what we 'say' through our bodily gestures and
facial expressions, so as to translate our body language, revealing its underlying feelings and
attitudes.

Body Language is also referred to as 'non-verbal communications', and less commonly 'non-
vocal communications'.

The term 'non-verbal communications' tends to be used in a wider sense, and all these terms
are somewhat vague.

For the purposes of this article, the terms 'body language' and 'non-verbal communications' are
broadly interchangeable. This guide also takes the view that body language/non-verbal
communications is the study of how people communicate face-to-face aside from the spoken
words themselves, and in this respect the treatment of the subject here is broader than typical
body language guides limited merely to body positions and gestures.

If you carry out any serious analysis or discussion you should clarify the terminology in your
own way to suit your purposes.

For example:

Does body language include facial expression and eye movement? - Usually, yes.

What about breathing and perspiration? - This depends on your definition of body language.
And while tone and pitch of voice are part of verbal signals, are these part of body language
too? - Not normally, but arguably so, especially as you could ignore them if considering only the
spoken words and physical gestures/expressions.

There are no absolute right/wrong answers to these questions. It's a matter of interpretation.

A good reason for broadening the scope of body language is to avoid missing important signals
which might not be considered within a narrow definition of body language.

Nevertheless confusion easily arises if definitions and context are not properly established, for
example:

It is commonly and carelessly quoted that 'non-verbal communications' and/or 'body language'
account for up to 93% of the meaning that people take from any human communication. This
statistic is actually a distortion based on Albert Mehrabian's research theory, which while itself
is something of a cornerstone of body language research, certainly did not make such a
sweeping claim.

Mehrabian's research findings in fact focused on communications with a strong emotional or

Care must therefore be exercised when stating specific figures relating to percentages of
meaning conveyed, or in making any firm claims in relation to body language and non-verbal
communications.

It is safe to say that body language represents a very significant proportion of meaning that is
conveyed and interpreted between people. Many body language experts and sources seem to
agree that that between 50-80% of all human communications are non-verbal. So while body
language statistics vary according to situation, it is generally accepted that non-verbal
communications are very important in how we understand each other (or fail to), especially in
face-to-face and one-to-one communications, and most definitely when the communications
involve an emotional or attitudinal element.

Body language is especially crucial when we meet someone for the first time.

We form our opinions of someone we meet for the first time in just a few seconds, and this
initial instinctual assessment is based far more on what we see and feel about the other person
than on the words they speak. On many occasions we form a strong view about a new person
before they speak a single word.

Consequently body language is very influential in forming impressions on first meeting

The effect happens both ways - to and from:

• When we meet someone for the first time, their body language, on conscious and
unconscious levels, largely determines our initial impression of them.

• In turn when someone meets us for the first time, they form their initial impression of us
largely from our body language and non-verbal signals.

And this two-way effect of body language continues throughout communications and
relationships between people.

Body language is constantly being exchanged and interpreted between people, even though
much of the time this is happening on an unconscious level.

Remember - while you are interpreting (consciously or unconsciously) the body language of
other people, so other people are constantly interpreting yours.
The people with the most conscious awareness of, and capabilities to read, body language tend
to have an advantage over those whose appreciation is limited largely to the unconscious.

You will shift your own awareness of body language from the unconscious into the conscious by
learning about the subject, and then by practising your reading of non-verbal communications
in your dealings with others.

body language is more than body positions and movements

Body language is not just about how we hold and move our bodies.

Body language potentially (although not always, depending on the definition you choose to
apply) encompasses:

• how we position our bodies

• our closeness to and the space between us and other people (proxemics), and how this
changes

• our facial expressions

• our eyes especially and how our eyes move and focus, etc

• how we touch ourselves and others

• how our bodies connect with other non-bodily things, for instance, pens, cigarettes,
spectacles and clothing

• our breathing, and other less noticeable physical effects, for example our heartbeat and
perspiration
Body language tends not to include:

• the pace, pitch, and intonation, volume, variation, pauses, etc., of our voice.

Arguably this last point should be encompassed by body language, because a lot happens here
which can easily be missed if we consider merely the spoken word and the traditional narrow
definition of body language or non-verbal communications.

Voice type and other audible signals are typically not included in body language because they
are audible 'verbal' signals rather than physical visual ones, nevertheless the way the voice is
used is a very significant (usually unconscious) aspect of communication, aside from the bare
words themselves.

Consequently, voice type is always important to consider alongside the usual body language
factors.

Similarly breathing and heartbeat, etc., are typically excluded from many general descriptions
of body language, but are certainly part of the range of non-verbal bodily actions and signals
which contribute to body language in its fullest sense.

More obviously, our eyes are a vital aspect of our body language.

Our reactions to other people's eyes - movement, focus, expression, etc - and their reactions to
our eyes - contribute greatly to mutual assessment and understanding, consciously and
unconsciously.

With no words at all, massive feeling can be conveyed in a single glance. The metaphor which
describes the eyes of two lovers meeting across a crowded room is not only found in old
romantic movies. It's based on scientific fact - the strong powers of non-verbal
communications.
These effects - and similar powerful examples - have existed in real human experience and
behaviour for thousands of years.

The human body and our instinctive reactions have evolved to an amazingly clever degree,
which many of us ignore or take for granted, and which we can all learn how to recognize more
clearly if we try.

Our interpretation of body language, notably eyes and facial expressions, is instinctive, and with
a little thought and knowledge we can significantly increase our conscious awareness of these
signals: both the signals we transmit, and the signals in others that we observe.

Doing so gives us a significant advantage in life - professionally and personally - in our dealings
with others.

Body language is not just reading the signals in other people.

Importantly, understanding body language enables better self-awareness and self-control too.

We understand more about other people's feelings and meanings, and we also understand
more about these things in ourselves.

When we understand body language we become better able to refine and improve what our
body says about us, which generates a positive improvement in the way we feel, the way we
perform, and what we achieve.
body language definitions

As explained, the terms body language and non-verbal communications are rather vague.

So what is body language? And more usefully, what might we regard it to be, if we are to make
the most of studying and using it?

The Oxford English Dictionary (revised 2005) definition is:

"body language - noun - the conscious and unconscious movements and postures by which
attitudes and feelings are communicated [for example]: his intent was clearly expressed in his
body language."

The Oxford Business English Dictionary offers a slightly different definition. Appropriately and
interestingly the Oxford Business English Dictionary emphasizes the sense that body language
can be used as a tool, rather than it being an involuntary effect with no particular purpose:

"body language - noun - the process of communicating what you are feeling or thinking by the
way you place and move your body rather than by words [for example]: The course trains sales
people in reading the customer's body language."

The OED dictionary definition of kinesics - the technical term for the study of body language
(and more loosely of body language itself) - depends on the interpretation of 'non-verbal
communication':

"kinesics - the study of the way in which certain body movements and gestures serve as a form
of non-verbal communication... [and] body movements and gestures regarded as a form of
non-verbal communication."
Body language is more than those brief descriptions.

• Body language certainly also encompasses where the body is in relation to other bodies (often
referred to as 'personal space').

• Body language certainly also includes very small bodily movements such as facial expressions
and eye movements.

• Body language also arguably covers all that we communicate through our bodies apart from
the spoken words (thereby encompassing breathing, perspiration, pulse, blood-pressure,
blushing, etc.)

In this respect, standard dictionary definitions don't always describe body language fully and
properly.

We could define body language more fully as:

"Body language is the unconscious and conscious transmission and interpretation of feelings,
attitudes, and moods, through:

• body posture, movement, physical state, position and relationship to other bodies, objects
and surroundings,

• facial expression and eye movement,

(and this transmission and interpretation can be quite different to the spoken words)."

Words alone - especially emotional words (or words used in emotional situations) - rarely
reflect full or true meaning and motive.
We find clues to additional or true meaning in body language.

Being able to 'read' body language therefore helps us greatly:

• to know how people feel and what they mean, and

• to understand better how people might be perceiving our own non-verbal signals, and (often
overlooked)

• to understand ourselves better, deeper than the words we hear ourselves saying.