How To Spot A Witch: 3. Nabbing The Elusive Imp One of The Most Devious

How to Spot a Witch Fasten a rope around his waist.
Then toss him into a

by Adam Goodheart pond or river. If he floats, he's a witch.
If he sinks, haul him back in and set him free. The
The belief in witches existed for centuries theoretical basis for this is simple, explained James VI of
before the trials at Salem. Over time, a Scotland in 1597: "The water shall refuse to receive in
considerable body of folklore developed her bosom those who have shaken off the sacred water
about how to identify witches. A of baptism."
contemporary writer explains the most
popular methods. Other popular tests include weighing the suspect
against a very heavy Bible (if she weighs less than the
Perhaps the reason witch-hunting has gotten a bad book, she is guilty) and asking her to recite the Lord's
name is that some practitioners used rather crude Prayer without making a mistake. (In 1663, a defendant
methods to separate the guilty from the innocent. The was convicted after repeatedly failing to do better than
notorious judges of the Holy Roman Empire, for "Lead us into temptation" or "Lead us not into no
example, simply applied thumbscrews until the temptation.") When you suspect a witch has murdered
unfortunate suspects confessed. And during the English someone, ask her to lay her hands on the victim's body.
witch craze in the 1640s, the Rev. John Gaule recorded If she is guilty, the corpse will start to bleed.
that 'every old woman with a wrinkled face, a furrd
brow, a hairy lip, a gobber tooth, a squint eye, a 3. Nabbing the Elusive Imp One of the most devious
squeaking voice, or a scolding tongue ... is not only ways to foil witches is to catch them with their familiars,
suspected, but pronounced for a witch." (Sexism was the imps in animal form who do their nefarious [wicked]
regrettably widespread among Gaule's colleagues, even bidding. Many witch hunters believed thee the imps
though both men and women could be witches.) But could not go for more than 24 hours without being
more discriminating European witch hunters used far suckled by their master or mistress. Therefore, when
more refined techniques, as described in early you have a suspect in prison, drill a peephole in the cell
lawbooks, manuals and court records. door and keep a close watch. If you see a rat, mouse or
beetle in the cell, you've nabbed an imp. Beware of
1. Devil's Marks and Witches' Teats According to many even the most improbable animals. In 1645, an
witch-hunting guides, it is best to start your Englishman named John Bysack confessed that for the
examination by shaving the suspect's body and last 20 years, he had regularly suckled imps in the form
examining it for devil's marks. These are the spots of snails.
where Satan brands his followers to seal their pact with
him. An English jurist in 1630 described' them as 4. Asking the Right Questions Even stubborn suspects
"sometimes like a blew spot, or a red spot, like a will often collapse under skillful interrogation. Europe's
Fleabiting." One problem: In the vermin-ridden 17th most successful witch hunters were expert at framing
century, such blemishes were hardly uncommon. So the questions of the when-did-you-stop-beating-your-wife
witch hunters devised an ingenious solution. The Devil, sort. The justices of Colmar in Alsace used to lead off
they reasoned, would not allow anything of his to be with "How long have you been a witch?" before moving
harmed. Therefore, they pricked any suspicious marks on to more specific inquiries such as "What plagues of
with a long silver pin. If the spot didn't bleed or was vermin and caterpillars have you created?"
insensitive to pain, the suspect was a witch.
WARNING:
English experts believed witches often had extra nipples
that they used to suckle demons. Matthew Hopkins, a According to the Molleus Ma/eficarum (Hammer of
witch hunter under Oliver Cromwell, exposed one Witches), a comprehensive witch-hunting guide
woman as a witch when she was "found to have three published in 1486, judges at witchcraft trials should take
teats about her, which honest women have not. precautions against being bewitched by the accused.
Always wear protection: A wax medallion containing a
2. The Swimming Test If the hunt for teats and devil's
bit of salt blessed on Palm Sunday, worn round the
marks proves inconclusive, you may have to resort to a
popular folk method, the "swimming test." First, neck, will defend you from Satan's wiles [tricks].
sprinkle the suspect with holy water. Tie his right thumb Otherwise, you yourself could end up on the wrong end
to his left big toe, and his left thumb to his right big toe. of a witch hunt.

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How to Spot a Witch Fasten a rope around his waist.

Then toss him into a

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