3

Identity and
Respect

33
LESSON THREE

IDENTITY
& RESPECT
he materials in this section enable students to start ex- IN THIS LESSON
ploring the two key areas of identity and respect. These
explorations are often particularly significant for many 1. THEORY
students, as this may be the first time that they have been IDENTITY
encouraged or empowered to explore these areas in their lives. SELF-IDENTITY
SOCIAL IDENTITY
As with any other personal area, there are complexities around
RESPECT
this, but we hope that this brief introduction will enable you
to reflect upon a few things before having this very valuable 2. ACTIVITIES
experience with your students. These reflections are critical as NAME SWAP
preparation for global dialogue for a number of reasons: WHAT DOES RESPECT LOOK LIKE?

IDENTITY WHEEL
1 In order to speak to others about the things that are impor-
tant to us we have to have reflected upon them, and appreciated REFLECTION QUESTIONS
the diversity within our own classrooms. 3. WORKSHEETS

2
It gives students the opportunity to develop those dialogue
skills further by being able to listen to and explore the diversity
within their own classroom. IDENTITY

This is an ideal time to remind students of the rules for dialogue One of the critical things about taking part in dialogue is that
that they agreed at the start, as it is important for students to we will have to talk about ourselves – so it is important to have
feel safe when discussing these very personal elements. It is fine a good idea of what we are talking about. This is not straight-
for students to ‘pass’ – nobody should have to share everything forward for anyone, certainly not without preparation, but it is
all the time, and certainly as students may be new to this kind of particularly challenging for adolescents. Part of the process of
very personal discussion, we should respect their wish to remain going through adolescence is precisely this formation of the core
silent on some issues. of identity, a core upon which they will build their understanding
of their own identities throughout the rest of their lives.
Critically, this requires a new approach for a teacher when asking
questions. In class, when we ask questions we are usually seeking SELF-IDENTITY: Self-identity refers to how we define ourselves.
recall of information that we have already given the students; Self-identity forms the basis of our self-esteem. In adolescence,
it is a test and we expect them to respond quickly. Sometimes the way we see ourselves changes in response to peers, family
we ask them for opinions but, on the whole, questions asked in and school, among other social environments. Our self-identities
class expect a quick fire response. There is, however, a world of shape our perceptions of belonging.
difference between “What is 2+2?” and “Why is it important to
you to celebrate Christmas/Eid?” Students not only don’t have SOCIAL IDENTITY: Social identity is constructed by others
“the right answer” to depend upon, but they may well never have and may differ from self-identity. Typically, people categorise
even reflected upon the answer to this, and it is important to individuals according to broad, socially-defined labels. For
give them thinking time in order to genuinely reflect upon this. example, if you have dark skin, you may be labelled ‘black’ by
others even though you may not have adopted that identity for
Paired or group discussion activities are important as well, as yourself.
they give students the opportunity to reflect upon these ideas
and to rehearse their responses in front of a smaller and more A positive self-identity relates strongly to positive self-esteem.
supportive audience, in order to feel more confident about All identities are not equally valued by society, so some adoles-
sharing in a larger group. cents may especially need reinforcement to help them construct

34
 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

a positive sense of self. Many dimensions of identity can inter- The most important approach that students need to develop is
sect to form our sense of self: gender, religious, racial, ethnic, a discerning and informed respect, not a vague tolerance of an-
national, generational, sexual, political, regional, professional, ything and everything. You might usefully compare these ideas
cultural and class. This multi-dimensionality can be explored which are unpacked in the resources below.
through the identity wheel activity in this lesson.
TOLERANCE: Tolerance is the lowest common denominator
There are a couple of particular challenges to beware of when required if there is to be freedom of religion and belief. Howev-
exploring identity with adolescents, and these are er, there are limits to tolerance and it maybe argued that some
to do with the way that they reflect upon (even un- points of view should not be tolerated in a democratic society.
consciously) their own identity formation. Barnett1
identifies these as the imaginary audience and the RESPECT: One cannot be taught to
personal fable, and they will be im- respect another position. Rather, respect
mediately obvious to anyone who is is ‘commanded’ by people holding a par-
used to working with young people. ticular view or living a particular way of
life. There is also the distinction between
The imaginary audience is a term respecting a view and respecting some-
used to describe the fact that many ado- one’s right/freedom to hold a view.
lescents feel that they are permanently on
stage; they feel that they are always being It is important to note that ‘respect’
watched by everyone. This approach drives the does not mean that we have to agree with
enormous sensitivity and self-consciousness that someone else’s point of view. This is certainly
many adolescents exhibit. not the case, in fact rather the opposite. If we
are genuinely treating someone with respect, we
This may often lead on to the personal fable. As young people should be honest in our relationships with them and, if they say
believe that everyone is looking at them all the time, they can something with which we disagree, then we should ensure that
fall into the trap of thinking that they are special; that they we express that – in a respectful way, of course.
are important or invulnerable (“The rules don’t apply to me”
or “It won’t happen to me”) which can make them sarcastic or RECOGNITION: One may respect another’s viewpoint or way
dismissive. of life to the extent that it should be publicly recognised as
contributing positively to global society.
These are both steps in the formation of identity and ones with
which teachers will be familiar, and we should hold in them in the The exercises on respect in these materials approach it from a
back of our minds while we are having these discussions with our profoundly embodied perspective – what does respect look like/
students. feel like? – and this provides students with a much more accessi-
ble approach than abstract speculation.
RESPECT

This is a particularly challenging concept in the context of learn-

ing about dialogue. It is also made more complex by the fact that
there are so many different understandings of the term in youth
and adult cultures around the world.

1  Helping Teens Answer the Question “Who am I”: Physical Development in

Adolescents (Barnett, 2005)

35
 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

A LESSON ACTIVITIES

OBJECTIVE RESOURCES

Worksheet 3.1: What Does Respect Look Like?

By the end of this lesson your students should know that there is
Worksheet 3.2: R.E.S.P.E.C.T Principles for Dialogue
diversity in their classroom, understand how it affects them and
have experienced reflection upon the importance of respect. STEP 1

Ask students to work in pairs to fill in examples in the What Does

ASSESSMENT CRITERIA
Respect Look Like? worksheet. These should be from their own
experience:
Students can reflect upon themselves and their experiences and
• Of how they have been treated with respect
students can demonstrate an understanding of how to treat one
• Of how they treat others with respect
another with respect.
• Of how they have seen other people act with respect

CLASSROOM ACTIVITIES STEP 2

After they have completed these, you should encourage a class

The worksheets that accompany the activities below can be
discussion. It is particularly valuable to explore differences in
found at the end of the lesson.
what people have said, as there are no hard and fast rules here.
This is particularly true across cultures where people can have
STARTER ACTIVITY 1
some quite different ideas. (In some cultures it is not respectful
NAME SWAP to make eye contact with someone that you are talking to, in
PURPOSE
others it is quite the opposite.)

To discover the meaning of their own name. This encourages You may also wish to refer to the R.E.S.P.E.C.T Principles for
students to reflect on the question, “What makes me, me?” Dialogue.
STEP 1 EXTENSION
Prior research (one homework before the first lesson) will In your discussion it may be appropriate to remind students that
probably be necessary for students to get the most out of this. the key idea we need to develop is a discerning and informed
As well as research at home, they can search the internet for the respect, not a vague tolerance of anything and everything. You
meaning of their names – many sites exist for this. might like to compare the tolerance, respect and recognition
STEP 2
scale (see page 36). Additional questions that students might
discuss include:
Each student takes a turn explaining the meaning of their name. • How do I decide what/whom to respect?
They can also include information on why their parents chose • What would prevent me from respecting a belief/action/
it, why it is important to them or what name they would prefer. statement?
You could use the Listen to Me (see page 10) activity to manage • What does respecting a person mean? Does it mean recog-
this. There is also considerable potential for display work. nising that even those who have done great harm to others
still have human rights that need to be respected?
MAIN ACTIVITY 1

WHAT DOES RESPECT LOOK LIKE? MAIN ACTIVITY 2

PURPOSE
IDENTITY WHEEL 2

Students consider the nature of respect in practise through their PURPOSE

own experience. Please remember as you approach this activity This is an activity designed to help students explore what identity
that ‘respect’ does not mean ‘agree with’ – our is. This will be an excellent way of helping students to begin to
experience of student dialogue consistently demonstrates that explore the diversity in their own communities. Students explore
students often have to work harder to feel comfortable iden- facets that compose their identities. Students should work on
tifying difference but that this is one of the most important their own throughout this activity, and should never feel pres-
experiences that they can have. sured to share anything about themselves that they wish to keep
private. (Please feel free to adapt the resource for this lesson; it
The purpose of this activity is to consider a range of ideas around could also include gender, sexuality, etc.)
the nature of respect. (We strongly suggest that you use your
own judgment about your students to inform the options that
you choose.)
2  Developed by the Tanenbaum Center for Interreligious Understanding,
https://tanenbaum.org/, used with permission.

36
 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

RESOURCES REFLECTION ACTIVITY 1

Worksheet 3.3: Social Identity Wheel Example REFLECTION QUESTIONS

Worksheet 3.4: Social Identity Wheel
PURPOSE
Worksheet 3.5: Social Identifiers
It’s always great to finish by reflecting upon the key ideas.
STEP 1
STEP 1
Begin by explaining to students that the purpose of this session
is to explore what we mean by ‘identity’. Ask them to suggest You can pick (or a student can pick) one of the following ques-
definitions for this word. While there may be components of our tions for the class to consider:
identities that are internal, the vast majority are generated by 1. Something I’d like to know more about would be...
the society in which we live. 2. Something I found particularly interesting was...
3. Today I learned...
STEP 2 4. Something that really stands out about what we learned is...
Use an example (possibly an historical character, there is an 5. Something I was a little unsure about was...
example one for Christopher Columbus) to demonstrate the 6. The big question remaining for me is...
way that the wheel should be filled in. Then ask students to fill in 7. One of the keywords I learned today is...
the wheel for themselves. 8. One thing from today’s lesson that made me think was...
9. If I could sum up my learning in three pictures they would
STEP 3 be...
When they have finished, you should ask them to record some 10. The most important thing to remember about today’s lesson
information to answer the questions under the wheel: is...
• What did you learn about yourself? 11. The student contribution I found most interesting was...
• Which parts of the wheel were easiest to fill out?
STEP 2
• Which parts of the wheel were the hardest to fill out?
• Are there important aspects of your identity that don’t fit There are lots of options about how to use the selected question:
on the wheel? 1. Students can answer in writing and then display their an-
• Were you surprised by any of the categories on the wheel? swers where they can see them.
2. Students can answer orally.
EXTENSION 3. You can use Sharing Our Ideas (see page 11) to stimulate
Ask students to answer the questions on the Social Identifiers discussion.
worksheet for one of the aspects of their identity that they have 4. You can repeat as many times as you want.
previously established. If appropriate, you can use this as the 5. Get students to write their ideas, so they can use this as the
basis for class discussion about aspects of their identities. basis for the blog / journal.

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3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

WORKSHEET 3.1

WHAT DOES RESPECT LOOK LIKE?

RESPECT...

LOOKS FEELS

LIKE... LIKE...

SOUNDS

LIKE...

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 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

WORKSHEET 3.2

R.E.S.P.E.C.T. PRINCIPLES FOR DIALOGUE

Dialogue enables us to talk about culture and identity, but we recommend that it always emphasises faith and
belief, because those two things can play a very positive role in our world, yet are almost always referred to in
a negative way. Dialogue emphasises similarity and difference; finding the ways in which we are similar to other
people is often easy but discovering the ways in which we are different gives us much more opportunity to learn.
Diversity is something that we celebrate. We have a number of principles that support all our work, summed up in
the acronym R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

RESPECT: We treat everyone with respect, we don’t have to agree with one another all

R the time, but we should always treat one another with respect.

EDUCATION: No matter how old or experienced we are, we all continue learning. We

E can always learn from one another and share a responsibility to teach others about the
things that are precious to us.

SAFETY: We know that people can only flourish when they are safe. We want everyone

S who takes part in dialogue to feel safe: students safe to openly share their ideas, teachers
safe that they are well-supported, principals and parents safe that the programme is educa-
tionally beneficial for all their students.

PERSPECTIVE: We want to help people make dialogue work in their individual circum-

P stances rather than forcing everyone to do the same thing. We know that sometimes we
have to be patient as schools find the best way to do that.

EMPATHY: Being open to looking at the world through someone else’s eyes gives us

E new ways to understand the world and helps us to learn and grow. We don’t have to accept
everything we encounter; sometimes the thing we learn is that we are different and disagree.

COMPASSION: We create opportunities for our young people to actively engage in

C their communities, working with others of different faiths and beliefs to address pressing
issues and make the world a better place.

TRUST: The key to any relationship is trust. Dialogue is about building trust that we will al-

T ways treat one another respectfully, openly and honestly, that we will always listen to each
other’s values and beliefs.

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 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

WORKSHEET 3.3

SOCIAL IDENTITY WHEEL EXAMPLE

This Identity Wheel has been completed for Christopher Columbus for the Year 1492, when he set sail for Cuba.

IT Y REL
I GI
H NIC ON
ET

ROMAN
WHITE
CATHOLIC
EUROPEAN
CHRISTIAN

CL
E

ASS
R AC

MIDDLE
GENOESE
CLASS

41 ABLE-BODIED
ABI
E

L
AG

IT Y

LATIN,
GENOESE, ITALIAN,
CATALAN PORTUGUESE
SPANISH

NA
E G TIO
UA G NAL
L AN IT Y

Developed by the Tanenbaum Center for Interreligious Understanding, https://tanenbaum.org/, used with permission.

40
 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

WORKSHEET 3.4

SOCIAL IDENTITY WHEEL

IT Y REL
NIC I GI
ON
E TH

CL
E

ASS
R AC

ABI
E

L
AG

IT Y

NA
GE A TIO
GU NAL
L AN IT Y

FOLLOW UP QUESTIONS:
ONLY SHARE PERSONAL What did you learn about yourself?
Which parts of the wheel were easiest to fill out?
INFORMATION THAT YOU ARE Which parts were the hardest to fill out?
Are there important aspects of your identity that don’t
fit on the wheel?
COMFORTABLE DISCUSSING
Were you surprised by any of the categories?

Developed by the Tanenbaum Center for Interreligious Understanding, https://tanenbaum.org/, used with permission.

41
 3 IDENTITY & RESPECT

WORKSHEET 3.5

SOCIAL IDENTIFIERS

Only share personal information that you are comfortable discussing. Social Identifiers are those qualities (visible
or hidden) that describe who we are. For example: race, gender, age, nationality and religion are all social identifiers.

STEP 1

Pick one Social Identifier that is important to you (that you identified on the wheel).

STEP 2

Now complete the following sentences:

One thing I love about being __________ is:

One thing that is hard about being __________ is:

One thing that I want others to know about being __________ is:

One thing that I never want to hear again about being __________ is:

Developed by the Tanenbaum Center for Interreligious Understanding, https://tanenbaum.org/, used with permission.

42