Mindfulness and the Adult Ego State

Juliet Verney

At the still point of the turning world. Neither flesh nor fleshless;
Neither from nor towards; at the still point, there the dance is,
But neither arrest nor movement. And do not call it fixity,
W here past and future are gathered. Neither movement from nor towards,
Neither ascent nor decline. Except for the point, the still point,
There would be no dance, and there is only the dance.
(T. S. Eliot, 1935, p. 173)

Abstract Child and Parent ego states to have largely in-

This article considers whether it is possi- tegrated into the Adult’s ego, where they “can
ble to find security in the ever-changing pro- now function like a valuable resource library,
cess of the Adult ego state. The author cites rather than as separate states of the ego that in-
several definitions of “Adult,” suggests that fluence, control and produce intrapsychic con-
individuation is not the final goal of matura- flict” (p. 88).
tion, and considers the idea that beyond per- In my exploration of mental “health” in this
sonal autonomy lies universal interconnect- article, I put transactional analysis and my own
edness. This article addresses the differences thinking into context and briefly discuss East-
between Eastern and Western psychologies ern and W estern psychologies. I suggest that
and suggests mindfulness meditation as a mindfulness meditation can be a means of con-
means of achieving inner balance and sta- necting to the body and to a wider universal re-
bility in the Adult. ality and that this practice can offer a sense of
______ security in the ever-changing process of the
Adult. I explore how mindfulness, as an intrin-
On my journey toward health, I have sought sically relational concept, can be helpful for
not only to “undo my pathology” but also to both therapist and client in the therapeutic rela-
find ways of “doing wellness.” Transactional tionship. Lastly, I look at the planetary need to
analysis offers an abundance of clear, helpful live with present-centered awareness and con-
models that describe pathology or imbalance of nectedness.
the mind, but fewer when one asks, “W hat is I refer to my own experience throughout this
mental health, and how do we live it?” Two of article on the assumption that what we have in
Berne’s positive concepts, “aspiration” and the common as human beings is greater than what
Greek term “physis,” were not expanded on in separates us through our individual identity. In
his own writing and have rarely been the focus other words, the personal is also the universal.
of transactional analysis literature (with the
exception of Clarkson, 1992a, 1992). For my W hat Is “Adult”?
purposes here, I take one aspect of TA’s cri- Statistically, in the transactional analysis lit-
teria for mental well-being— an “uncontamina- erature, the Adult ego state has received less at-
ted Adult ego state” (Clarkson, 1992b, p. 53)— tention than the Child and Parent over the years.
and using Tudor’s (2003, p. 201) definition of Tudor (2003) suggests it is as if “the sympto-
the integrating Adult, ask what it might mean to matology of TA itself excludes the Adult from
inhabit this Adult process. its full analysis, design or consideration” (p.
I interpret “uncontaminated” to mean the per- 201). (It is an intriguing thought that if trans-
sonality is sufficiently developed “through cor- actional analysis excludes the Adult from its
rective life experiences or an effective, healing consideration, perhaps it is a reflection of a
psychotherapy” (Erskine, 2003, p. 88) for the society that also “switches back and forth

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JULIET VERNEY

between Parent and Child with thoughts and be- sensing, knowing, not knowing. Take the image
haviors somewhat unrelated to objective reality” of the ocean and a wave: the wave as a fleeting,
[W oollams & Brown, 1978, p. 38]). The Adult creative expression of the ocean. It comes from
ego state appears to have been portrayed as the ocean and returns to the ocean and remains
“what’s left behind” when Child and Parent ocean in its essence, even as it lives out its
have been identified; one of Berne’s (1961) de- individual wave experience. Both ocean and
scriptions of Adult is “the residual state left wave are fluid. T his is echoed by Jon Kabat-
after the segregation of all detectable Parent Zinn (1990), founder of the Stress Reduction
and Child elements” (p. 76). Clinic in Massachusetts, who writes that “life is
In general, transactional analysis literature always in flux . . . everything we think is per-
seems to have seen the Adult negatively, as data manent is actually only temporary and con-
processing, static, and passive. For instance, stantly changing. This includes our ideas, our
W oollams and Brown (1978) offered this: “The opinions, our relationships, our jobs, our pos-
Adult functions as a probability-estimating com- sessions, our creations, our bodies, everything”
puter. It appears not to be a fully autonomous (p. 6).
ego state, but rather functions mostly at the re- Life is transitory; there is only now, and there
quest of one of the other ego states” (p. 15). are no fixed reference points. Although I own
Erskine (2003) transforms this shadowy im- that I have myriad ways of avoiding this truth,
age of the Adult, emphasizing the “full neopsy- including fighting it and forgetting it, I believe
chic capacity of the Adult ego to integrate val- that to inhabit Adult means to awaken fully to
ues, process information, respond to emotions this reality. The maturing process requires that
and sensations, and be creative and contactful” I come to terms with impermanence. Porter-
(p. 87). Steele (Novey et al., 1993) puts it this way: “If
Tudor (2003), most recently, breathes vibrant we cling to the sense of self as something defi-
life into the Adult by introducing the neopsy- nite, fixed, and solid, then it becomes an obsta-
chic integrating Adult, “a pulsating personality, cle to further development” (p. 129).
processing and integrating feelings, attitudes, Transactional analysis psychotherapy has been
thoughts and behaviours appropriate to the here- profoundly helpful to me in understanding my
and-now . . . at all ages, from conception to personal journey, and skilled therapists, train-
death” (p. 201). He stresses that the process of ers, and supervisors have given me new experi-
becoming is ever changing, present centered, ences in relating. But living script free creates
and never static: “As the neopsychic Adult is in a void. I know my mind when it runs the old
constant process, it may not be fixated either familiar tapes of self-destruction and obsession,
clinically or conceptually” (p. 222). the endless traffic of chatter and negative repe-
Questions arise at this point: M y Adult may tition. The mind that has the space for thoughts
not be fixated, or I may not be fixated? Am “I” “appropriate to the here and now” is unknown
separate from my Adult? Is Adult an ego state? territory. I have a need for “know-how” in the
If I am not my Adult, an internal split is perpe- neopsyche. How is the mind to tolerate the
tuated, as, for example, in the phenomenologi- script-free void without grasping for what it
cal difference between saying “My Adult feels knows, especially when meeting the triggers
. . . ” and “I feel. . . .” For the purposes of this that threaten to plummet it back to regressed
article, I take Massey’s (Novey, Porter-Steele, Child and Parental states of mind, feelings, and
Gobes, & Massey, 1993) view: “Consider the behaviors? In those inevitable moments of
I as the Adult ego state. The Adult is the sub- stress— the trigger points— in which the body
ject and the current process that is going on in tightens, the breath stops, and the old defenses
the here-and-now” (p. 133). This brings “Adult” threaten, what is there? The adaptive structures
and “I” together as one. I am seeking to give up have given me some
W ith this in mind, I am less a solid, separate security, however limiting. W hat might take
entity and more a permeable, responsive being- their place? I need a way to stay present to
ness. I am a continual flow of becoming, feeling, what is, whether that be fair or foul, internal as

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 MINDFULNESS AND THE ADULT EGO STATE

in a destructive thought pattern or external as in Adult— cannot be the end of the story if we are
some unexpected event, a way to inhabit the talking about a process of maturing. Sills (2007)
space between the archaic securities and new, put it this way: “The resolution of suffering en-
healthy, in-flux living. How do we live in tails more than just an expression of emotions,
Adult, in the decontaminated, deconfused now, a clearing of trauma impacts and neural dys-
and find security in this constantly changing regulation, or a recognition and letting go of
process? defensive or adaptive processes. On a deeper
level it is about realignment and reconnection
Context to something often obscured by our subjective
In answering this question, I have found it experience of life, our innate spiritual nature”
helpful to “stand back from the trees to see more (p. 6).
of the wood” by placing my own thinking, and W ithin this context, it is easier to see what
transactional analysis, in a cultural context. In the void I experience might be indicating. The
particular, the different focus of Eastern and cultural emphasis on individual integration,
W estern cultures toward mental health and psy- essential as it is, needs to be balanced by, or
chotherapy has thrown light on these dilemmas. perhaps lead to, an awareness of our connec-
W elwood (1983) describes the difference as tedness to the bigger picture. The lack of this
follows: “W estern theories of personality and connection manifests in the way we live. Again,
mental health have mostly focused on the caus- I take myself as an example: My mind seldom
es and symptoms of neurosis and psychosis, stops; it scans like a computer with no “off”
while rarely spelling out what healthy human switch; it argues constantly with itself, imag-
functioning consists of. The Eastern traditions, ines attack around every corner, is defensive,
on the other hand, have emphasized states of watchful, and anxious. This creates behavior
optimal health and expanded being, rather than that is impulsive, gratification seeking, and
focusing on disease or psychopathology” (p. reactive. I rarely relax and stop, unless I am
57). It seems that the focus in transactional asleep, and even then I am alert.
analysis on pathology rather than well-being, It is easy to see I am not alone in this. I am
on what is wrong rather than what might be part of a culture, I suggest, that suffers with at-
right, is in line with Western psychological tention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Can this
theories in general. state of mind be called “Adult” or, indeed,
Kornfield (Kornfield, Ram Das, & Miyuki, mentally healthy? How do I stay present cen-
1983) talks about the emphasis W estern psy- tered in a world that encourages constant dis-
chologies place on analysis, investigation, and traction? The busy lives we lead “in the techno-
“the adjustment of personality,” often neglect- logically driven culture that consumes our at-
ing our connection to the wider universe. “It is tention often produce a multitasking frenzy of
as if you climb the mountain a little way, and activity that leaves people constantly doing, with
you have a very small view of the fields and no space to breathe and just be” (Siegel, 2007,
trees but don’t have the power to see the whole p. 4).
landscape, that is, who you are in relation to
everything else” (p. 35). Individuality
This “in relation to everything else” re- The inability to “just be” is the inevitable
assures me. In fact, it feeds a hunger in me: the outcome of the deeper issue touched on by Korn-
longing to connect to something greater than field. How can an individual mind relax and
the individual self and to know myself in con- stop thinking in a culture that gives such signi-
text. This is an obvious concept in many other ficance to that individual’s rational/irrational
psychological schools, comparable to Jung’s mind and that lacks any tradition, except
collective unconscious, the field in gestalt, and through religious worship, of seeing and ex-
the mutual interdependency of Buddhist prac- periencing how the individual fits into the
tice. It makes sense to me that adjustment of bigger picture? A mind-set that believes its own
the individual personality— the decontaminated identity is the ultimate goal will continually be

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JULIET VERNEY

fighting to support itself in this belief. Return- options, my individual mind can only persist in
ing to the metaphor of the ocean and the waves, its delusion that it is all there is, ceaselessly
in the W est we are encouraged to achieve our vigilant in its efforts to defend itself. It is a
“waveness,” and for those of us who have psy- mind separated from the body and from its own
chological and emotional wounds, psychothera- essential nature, convinced of its own impor-
py is a priceless gift in helping us toward this tance, supported by the culture, and with no al-
personal integration and healing. But if we ac- ternative organizing principle. How can it relax
cept that Adult is a process of becoming, rather and feel safe? It is an individual head that is cut
than a fixed state, then Adult can not only be off from its source of wisdom and at the same
strengthened, in transactional analysis terms, time expected to know it all.
but developed. In seeking an alternative way of seeing, W el-
In other words, becoming Adult involves not wood’s (1983) concept of “bigger mind” has
only consolidation, but also movement for- been useful to me.
ward. Individuation becomes a stepping stone The mind that the Eastern traditions are
on the path to maturation, not the destination. most interested in is not the thinking capa-
There is no wave without ocean, and to hold city, but rather what the Zen master Suzuki
personal autonomy as the ultimate goal is to be Roshi called “big mind,” a fundamental
split from our source. Since it is frightening to openness and clarity which resonates di-
be split and disconnected, we do more of what rectly with the world around us. This big
we have learned to do, that is, work harder, mind is not created or possessed by any-
think faster, numb out, earn more, get busier. one’s ego; rather, it is a universal wake-
Anything to fill the gap. fulness that any human being can tap into.
From this perspective, my frenetic mind-set The rational thinking apparatus we know
is the manifestation of a fundamental cultural so well in the W est is, in this perspective,
perception: seeing the self only as an individual a “small mind.” (p. viii)
with a fixed identity, unconnected to anything Albert Einstein is supposed to have suggest-
larger than itself. I recognize in my own experi- ed that the problems we have cannot be solved
ence the tyranny of the impoverished, grandi- at the same level of thinking with which we
ose, dualistic mind, both frightened and excited created them. This would imply that a culture
by the control it feels entitled to within a that so honors the rational mind and is out of
Cartesian-influenced culture, that is, a culture touch with the intuitive body/mind needs bal-
embedded in the doctrine that mind and body ancing with another way of perceiving the
are separate entities (Reyner in collaboration world if we are to develop our capacity for true
with Laurence & Upton, 2001, p. 46). That is a mental health.
mind with a distorted view of itself, out of its To inhabit the process of Adult more secure-
depth and in need of assistance. Welwood (2000) ly, then, may require looking outside the cultur-
describes this situation as the individual mind al norm for the means, the know-how, to carve
being “pretender to the throne” and says, “To out time and space to “be,” to be in the body
reify ego [the individual mind] as a necessary, and to develop a consciousness that understands
enduring structure of the psyche, as W estern and incorporates our connection to source. So,
psychology does, only solidifies its central posi- where do we look for this different mind/body
tion in our lives and impedes our capacity to awareness?
move beyond it” (p. 39).
An analogy might be this: Just as in transac- Transactional Analysis Literature and
tional analysis we often witness the Child ego Spirituality
state desperately attempting to relate to the For an overview of transactional analysis and
world in the absence of an integrated Adult, so personal transcendence, I refer you to Traut-
we could say that the individual mind has con- mann’s (2003) article “Psychotherapy and Spir-
trol, not because it is indispensable, but for lack ituality,” in which she addresses the issue of
of any other guiding authority. W ithout other spirituality as it arises between therapist and

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 MINDFULNESS AND THE ADULT EGO STATE

client as well as cites other transactional analy- Welwood’s description of the universal wake-
sis contributors to this field. She writes, “Trans- fulness inherent in Eastern traditions links di-
cending self through resolving script, being in rectly to Tudor’s unfixed, here-and-now Adult.
full contact with ourselves and all of creation, Tudor (2003) makes this connection when he
living authentically and with integrity, and em- writes, “The present-centred nature of the Adult is
bracing the mystery of ‘beyond self’ is what compatible, for instance, with Buddhist teach-
therapy can be about, whatever words we might ing on philosophy, psychology and practice in
use to describe it or however we might ap- everyday living” (p. 220).
proach it” (p. 36). The transcendent self, then, has been ad-
Mellor (2008) talks about the value of psy- dressed in transactional analysis, but it perhaps
chological models or systems, including trans- has further potential. The transpersonal psycho-
actional analysis, in helping us release our- logist Ken W ilber (1979) recommends transac-
selves from old structures, processes, and be- tional analysis when he writes that it “recog-
haviors. However, he writes, “There is much nizes the possibility of deeper levels of one’s
more to us than transactional analysis or any being, and thus does not overtly sabotage deep-
other model can describe, and it is from that er insights” (p. 93).
‘more to us’ that our freedom comes, provided I now turn to mindfulness meditation and the
we seek it” (p. 196). simple, difficult, and powerful practice of sit-
Clarkson (1992a), addressing the psychology ting still and using the breath to make deep
of the self in transactional analysis, described a contact with ourselves and with universal “big
self “ ‘distinct from elements of the personal- mind.”
ity,’ that not only differentiates us from each
other, but ‘also differentiates us from our own M indfulness
ever-changing contents of consciousness’ ” (p. Questioner: All teachers advise to medi-
200). This implies, to me, a state of awareness tate. W hat is the purpose of meditation?
that can witness our own mind. Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj: W e know the
Law (2006) has written in depth about the outer world of sensations and actions, but
observer/witness in his reevaluation of the self, of our inner world of thoughts and feelings
extending “the theoretical base of transactional we know very little. The primary purpose
analysis beyond inter-personal interaction into of meditation is to become conscious of,
the realms of transpersonal experience” (p. 334). and familiar with, our inner life. The ulti-
He widely references other transactional analy- mate purpose is to reach the source of life
sis authors on the subject. and consciousness. (Nisargadatta Maharaj,
Transactional analysis uses the concept of 1973, p. 12)
“physis,” of course, which originally meant Mindfulness practice involves both/either a
“change or growth that comes from the spirit formal sitting meditation and the less formal
within the person” (Tilney, 1998, p. 91). Clark- application of attention in everyday life. The
son’s (1992b) interpretation of physis as “the “mind” in mindfulness needs to be understood
self's natural aspiration for growth and devel- as “big mind”: intuitive, open awareness, not
opment towards health, transcendent of ego rational, individual mind, mind that is connect-
states” (p. 197) suggests an openness toward ed to body. This is the body/mind that “can
something beyond the limited sense of self. She tune into subtle feeling and intuition, energy
wrote that as we get closer to our true nature flow, and a sense of interrelatedness with all of
through the process of psychotherapy, we dis- creation” (W elwood, 2000, p. 6). Mindfulness
cover physis working within us, and “at the has been described as moment-to-moment non-
same time, there is an accompanying, growing judgmental awareness; unconditional friendli-
awareness and appreciation of universal mean- ness toward oneself; experience through the
ings, a striving towards connectedness with senses of a deep connectedness to the body and
spiritual, religious or transcendental values” (p. to the outside world, to a nondualistic reality;
197). and a reversal of the “lonely helplessness of

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JULIET VERNEY

Descartes’s ‘cogito ergo sum,’ I think therefore even argue with myself about the right way to
I am” (O’Donohue, 1997, p. 97). be present! “W e imagine that somehow this
To learn about mindfulness in depth, I refer present is not quite right, is not quite it, and
you to Jon Kabat-Zinn (1990, 2005) and Daniel hence we will not globally rest in this present,
Siegel (2007). Siegel describes it as a form of but start instead to move away from it toward
intrapersonal attunement, a relationship with what we imagine will be a new and better pres-
the self, and shows at length the physiological ent” (W ilber, 1979, p. 137). But with practice,
changes and positive effects of mindfulness on I stop identifying with the thoughts, stop re-
brain functioning. Pat Ogden (Ogden, Minton, sponding to my restless, individual mind. I see
& Pain, 2006), author of Sensorimotor Psycho- more clearly the tumbling cascade of elaborate
therapy, puts it succinctly: “Mindfulness entails fears, wishes, judgments, emotions, and fanci-
orienting and attending to the ebb and flow of ful imaginings that is triggered by any one
present experience” (p. 193). For me, these single thought.
practices, formal and informal, are unique as a Sitting in “big mind” allows me— through
means of stilling the mind and attuning to what- experience rather than cognition— a new per-
is-right-now, that is, inhabiting the present- spective on “small mind” and my individual
centeredness of Adult. self. I start to see the distortion and glimpse a
Meditation cannot be grasped intellectually; bigger reality.
it needs to be experienced. For this reason it is In the quiet space of sitting, my personal
easier to describe in terms of what it is not than identity resumes realistic proportions. Although
what it is. It is not dissociation, concentration, essential to my fulfilment as an individual, my
fantasy, or introspection. It is more of a “letting “waveness” is, in the end, less important, less
go” process, a release of unwanted mental busy- in control than I had supposed. And this dimi-
ness. Clutter free, “the natural activity of the nution of the significance of individual identity
mind to be alert and observant becomes appar- is not, I discover, a problem, except to “small
ent” (Varela, T hompson, & Rosch, 1991, p. mind,” of course. It is a relief, a liberation! It
31). To oversimplify, it involves holding the frees up energy. Maintaining the defenses around
mind still on a single object, often the breath as my separateness is hard work. Meditation is
it rises and falls in the body, allowing whatever also hard work. But the difference is this: The
arises in the mind or emotions to simply be energy that used to be spent patrolling the peri-
there and continually returning one’s attention meters of my identity or controlling “my patho-
to the body and one’s immediate inner experi- logy” now gets used in the practice of positive
ence. This practice gradually brings the mind health, that is, keeping the individual self in
and body back into balance, and with that balance with and connected to the whole. The
comes the startling awareness of just how un- stillness of the void becomes home, the place
coordinated mind and body usually are. W hy from which all else occurs, rather than a fearful
does it matter? The separation disconnects us nothingness to be avoided at all costs. M y ener-
from our own experience; reconnecting has gy is going toward health, not survival.
wide implications. In the words of Holifield How is mindfulness different from a cognitive-
(1998), “Perhaps most obvious is the contri- behavioral therapy (CBT) technique? The dif-
bution this makes to healing the dualism of the ference for me is that meditation practice gives
culture by shifting the predominant emphasis me a bodily experience that is beyond the
on the mind to allow for a fuller experience of intellect’s ability to grasp: that of connection.
self” (p. 61). W e become aware in mindfulness, writes Sills
Mindfulness takes me into the void, the (2007), “not just of an arising internal process,
space between thoughts, and shows me that my be it a sensation, feeling tone, thought, or state
thoughts are not who I am. In the void I can of consciousness, but also its relationship to the
hear the internal drama, the noise and argu- external world and relational interchange and,
ments taking place in my mind, all the stuff I even more importantly, to sense the interrelated
use to avoid being present with myself now. I flux of experience as a whole” (p. 170).

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So what answers do I have to my original part of everything else” (Fulton, 2008, p. 64).
question, that is, how can I live in the integra- This extended awareness can bring to the work
ting neopsyche? To inhabit the process of a flexible, calm, open-ended attitude, a loosen-
Adult more securely, I need to inhabit myself ing of the need to defend myself or identify
more fully; to remember that Adult involves myself as this or that sort of a therapist. The fo-
reconnecting head with body; to value my phe- cus becomes a mutual inquiry into experience,
nomenological experience, thereby healing the a relational journey, rather than the seeking of
split from my own knowing; to recognize that solutions.
the unified body/mind is a source of informa- The inner space allows me to see more clear-
tion and wisdom, which historically W estern ly and to put my own experience into a cultural
psychology has ignored or underrated; and to as well as a personal context. I become more
allow my mind, through meditation, the relief aware of what is “running” me, both as an indi-
of connecting to a larger reality. I need to come vidual and as a therapist: the influence, for ex-
home to my essential self. ample, of my skin color, race, class, and gender.
I give the last word to Kabat-Zinn (1990): Individual psychotherapy goes a long way to-
Learning how to stop all your doing and ward developing a secure base, a stable sense
shift over to a “being” mode, learning how of self. However, one-to-one therapy also mir-
to make time for yourself, how to slow down rors and perpetuates the individualistic orien-
and nurture calmness and self-acceptance tation of the culture. Groupwork, on the other
in yourself, learning to observe what your hand, allows us to put that stability into prac-
own mind is up to from moment to mo- tice, to experience connectedness, feedback,
ment, how to watch your thoughts and how and validation within a wider community, to
to let go of them without getting so caught see the view from a little farther up the moun-
up and driven by them, how to make room tain. The group can provide a safe container for
for new ways of seeing old problems and exploring difference and for seeing oneself in
for perceiving the interconnectedness of relation to others.
things, these are some of the lessons of This process helps heal our earliest cultural
mindfulness. (p. 20) wound, which in Buddhist terms is separation
from the whole. Frank (2001) sums it up this
Implications for the Therapeutic way: “The work of therapy is to help clients or-
Relationship ganize their awareness so that they experience
How we see ourselves is, to some extent, cul- themselves as part of, rather than alienated
turally decided. In the W estern world, we place from their environment” (p. 70)— and further,
a boundary around the individual self more perhaps, to see how their environment/culture
firmly than in other cultures that might see the fits into the bigger picture.
boundary between self and other more in terms A word about offering mindfulness/meditation
of family or tribal identity. “Thus do we, as to clients: In my view, this depends on the thera-
mental health professionals and participating peutic goals being sought. Conditional on a cli-
members of the culture, inherit a culturally unique ent’s ability to cathect Adult, this practice can
view of the self as autonomous” (Fulton, 2008, be beneficial as a means of soothing anxiety,
p. 58). From a Buddhist perspective, many of becoming grounded, and developing the ob-
our Western disorders of the self occur as the server self. I would not offer meditation if the
result of this view: the mistaken perception that client’s need is to release deep emotion, strength-
we are separate and autonomous when, in reali- en ego boundaries, or work through complex
ty, we are innately interdependent and connected. relational dynamics.
Mindfulness practice can help therapists to The ability to still my own mind allows me to
hold both these realities at once: a client’s im- make full use of the immense significance of
mediate individual struggle and the recognition now. Stern (2004) has written exhaustively about
that she or he is also part of a “larger back- the rich opportunities that are available to thera-
ground in which everything is an inextricable pist and client in the present moment, suggesting

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JULIET VERNEY

that in it lies the microcosm of the client’s re- Conclusion

ality and therefore the seed of change, the pos- In this article I suggest that Adult is not only
sibility of a new experience. Our anxiety, Stern a process but a practice. I have described how
suggests, can be an obstacle in staying open to transactional analysis, as a Western psychology,
the precious “unknown”quality of the present focuses on integration of the personality, and in
moment. “W e are generally less inclined to my experience, this alone cannot offer the an-
tolerate the increased tension of staying in the choring necessary to live in the constant flux of
here and now. It becomes the path not taken, Adult. It needs ultimately to be balanced by an
with all the lost opportunities that implies” (p. alternative (Eastern) perception of the mind in
170). order to provide the stability in which Adult/I
W hen I can stay open to my own vulnera- can remain both stable and evolve. I suggest that
bility, I am likely to be less anxious when my psychotherapy takes me on an essential journey
client nears the terror of his or her own un- toward individuation and that mindfulness of-
known void. Mindfulness practice is a way of fers the framework in which the journey can
not only tolerating, but feeling at home in that continue into maturity. I show the benefits a still
tension. If I can hold my own mind comfortab- mind can bring to the therapeutic relationship
ly in the intersubjective space, I can offer my and look briefly at the planetary implications of
client encouragement to quiet her or his own paying attention to the present moment.
thinking. W hen two minds are still, then there
is the possibility of a gentle spreading out of Juliet Verney, M.Sc. (TA psychotherapy), is
the client’s life before our eyes, in all its deli- a transactional analysis psychotherapist in pri-
cacy, pain, and beauty. All this becomes avail- vate practice. She can be reached at Flat 14,
able in the fragile unpredictability of the now Wharf Mill, Wharf Hill, Winchester, Hamp-
moment. shire S023 9NJ, United Kingdom; e-mail:
julietverney@yahoo.com .
The W ider Need
Once we are aware that being here now is the
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