THE

VIRTUE

CONCEPT
 THE VIRTUE CONCEPT

BY
DICKEY EMMANUELLA CHIOMA
 DEDICATION.
This book is being dedicated first to God
Almighty Himself for placing these ideas, and
the wisdom to put it down in writing in me. Just
for choosing me to deliver such a rich content
and mystery to you, I’m so grateful.
I cannot fail to acknowledge my parents for
being the perfect channel for nurturing this
pretty lady.
To my beautiful mother and mentor, I appreciate
and value you more than you know. My late dad
was an amazing personality and he did play a
huge role in making this book come alive, so I
am truly grateful despite the obvious fact that
you’re no longer here to witness my growth
process. I love you so much.
To my friends, family and everyone who has
supported me on this journey so far in your own
way, I am truly grateful. So, thank you.
 ACKNOWLEDGEMENT.
This being my first time ever to actually write a
whole book and publish it, is one of the most
amazing feelings I have ever had so far and I
will not claim to have done it all by myself. It
was never a one-man journey. Though I have
solicited to appreciate a few persons in words
and recognition of names recorded here, you
know how you helped me achieve this milestone
and your names are hereby recorded in my
heart.
To my mentor, Mrs. Dickey N. Gloria, who also
happens to be my biological mother, I have been
privileged to learn, watch, observe, cultivate and
be mentored up close by you. It took me time to
realize despite the obvious signs and
characteristics that you were my mentor and
role model. I was previously of the opinion that
a mentor had to be a celebrity who you
miraculously get to connect with you in person,
then receive guidance from them as time went
by, but it wasn’t so. You are amazing and I did
enjoy mirroring you even down to your
handwriting. I love you and thank you for being
my first contact and example of virtue.
As much as I’d love to recall so much about
how you helped me become the person I am
today. I would just be making mention of one
very significant thing you did. He made sure my
siblings and I understood the place of authority
and honesty while growing up. He is my loving
father and gossip partner, Late Mr. Dickey Peter
Okechukwu. Your legacy lives on.
Mr. Nneeh Chile David, I would be so wrong if
I do not acknowledge your immense assistance
to bringing this truth alive. Plus, I would like to
say that you were God’s backup plan to make
me stay true to the plan he made known to me
concerning this book from the beginning of the
year 2022. This paragraph cannot contain the
entire truth, from your consistent
encouragements, the books you got me, the
links you sent, and lots more that I cannot
mention but still, I want to say thank you for
yielding to the leading of the Holy Spirit.
To my beautiful friend Toluwase Abisola
Akinwume, lol… it was destined right from the
existence of time that our paths would meet.
Thank you so much for the encouragements, the
ideas you gave, the laughter, and for lending
your amazing brain power to help me edit and
proof read my work. You are amazing and God
bless you.
 CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
FOREWORD
PREFACE
CHAPTER ONE
INTRODUCTION
-The Virtue Concept (definition)
CHAPTER TWO
-Virtue is fiction
CHAPTER THREE
-Ethics and Religions
CHAPTER FOUR
-Reputation, Relationship and Responsibilities.
THE AUTHORS VIEW
 PREFACE
I heard clearly these words, "The world will get darker
surely... But it's needed. That's the perfect environment
for light". This is what I heard and I could as well have
rephrased it but it is clear enough. You know that God
will speak to you in a language that you can comprehend,
that is if you weren't able to get the first three signs, he
had given you previously. Don’t quote me on this one
because it might have been more than just three signs god
gave you. (smiles)…
People will pretend to have their lives figured out and
would put up a smile and an attitude to compliment it.
But, wouldn’t it be much better if our actions could match
our innermost selves. (laughs)… Now, you might
question this statement knowing that everyone has
different measures of positivity and negativity, some
persons have higher tendency to respond positively and
others negatively. The problem here is that, majority
would fall under the negative spectrum and because of
this tendency, I have written this book to assist and give
us reasons to make better decisions and choices that
would help us become better persons first for ourselves
and then for those around us.
CHAPTER
ONE
 INTRODUCTION;

It is my Earnest desire to deliver in adequacy,

the knowledge and value behind virtue. I wish
for the acquisition of virtue to become a
conscious pursuit. Most of us have realized it’s
fading patterns every day and everywhere. Well,
with that said, I choose to believe that virtue can
and is still being cultivated. We will proceed
with this book to comprehend the author’s view
in sight of all analysis that can and will be
stated.
NOTE: This is not a rule book on how to
become virtuous. This book is just to analyze
the benefits of doing the right thing at the
right time in other to become a better version
of yourself daily.
It will be assumed that everyone reading this
book has a question or two on their minds,
either looking for an answer or just questioning
the purpose behind the book. Either way this
book will benefit all who read through it.
“Inspiring every and anyone working towards
becoming better people, not just for one's sake
but for everyone around them”, this my dear
reader is the aim.
The virtue concept is more of a movement
targeted at inspiring people to become morally
excellent. This is important to me more than
anything else because a lot of valuable attributes
and traits of morality and common sense (which
isn’t common either) are gradually fading and
generally being diluted as time goes on. The
essence of virtue is based on it's worth and
value. It is the quality of doing what is right and
avoiding what is wrong. A virtuous man is
difficult to find these days. Do not get me
wrong, these people still do exist, it's just that
they are gradually losing confidence in
themselves and are gradually falling in line with
the norms of making self-centered decisions.
According to various sources I consulted during
my research on virtue, they all said one thing
which were the words "good" and "quality". The
Longman Active Study Dictionary in the 5th
edition puts its definition in ways that hits the
nail on the head. i.e.; a behavior that is morally
good or a good quality in someone's character,
and an advantage that makes something better
or more useful than other things. Other sources
states that the word virtue could be the quality
of doing what is right and avoiding what is
wrong, any admirable quality or attribute,
morality with relations to sexuality or “a
particular moral excellence”. We would
evaluate and also analyze other relative terms in
subsequent time.
With all that has been written, I believe it's safe
to say that the concept of virtue is a reality that
has been sidelined and overlooked for so long
and with its definition, has been proven to be of
benefit and importance to the development of
any and every field, society, organizations,
association, etc.
Now, it is a known fact that those who
possess "VIRTUE" are known as
"VIRTUOUS", and I say this with no regards or
recognition to gender as virtue simply means
behaving in a way that is morally good. The
word moral is based on the principles of what is
right and what is wrong. A moral person has
high standards of behavior based on these
principles. It is also something you "learn" from
a story. All these terms, words and definitions
are targeted at passing across a message which
is "the concept of right and wrong".
Along the line, we would have to consider a few
concepts and or terms to further broaden our
understanding on the concept in view of this
write-up.
Let's move on....
Some of you can still remember from your high
school days the calculation method known as
"The almighty formula", and if you've graduated
from high school a long time ago but you still
remembered this formula, you are blessed with a
really good memory. Well, we are going to be
looking at another formula given by a well-
known philosopher named "Aristotle". Now,
according to him, the scale of virtue rests
equally between being deficient and being
excessive in doing what is right. Let us put this
in a diagram.
VIRTUE DEFICIENT EXCESSIVE
RESPECT DISRESPECT COURTEOUS++
BOLDNESS COWARDICE FOOLISHNESS+

Now, looking at the diagram above, you would

see a little construction built on the perspective
of “THE VIRTUE SCALE”. Truth be told any
virtue expressed on the excessive side is
foolishness, while any virtue expressed on the
deficient column is inferior to initial virtue.
Now, know that virtue is present even in its
deficient and excessive state. Its percentage is
literally going to be higher on one spectrum.
NOTE TO SELF; This concept is a trend that
will never fade, it's an intangible but daily
accessory. You've got to join this trend or
remain outdated. YOU ARE VIRTUOUS. You
do know when to make the right decision,
choices and actions but just tend to make the
wrong decision, choices and actions sometimes.
According to my "Advanced English
Dictionary", the synonyms under the word
virtue are; Merit, Chastity, and Sexual morality.
All these words paint a picture of self-worth,
discipline and responsibility. This is all I’m
trying to portray. All these terms are
interconnected.
We have seen various definitions and I must be
sounding like a scholar to some of you right
now but the truth is, this feels more like a
conversation to me, where I can express my
thoughts and I just tend to generate responses
from my mentally constructed audience or may
I say, imaginary recipient.
A person receives understanding and insight
from an already existing pattern of either work,
business, academics, agriculture and, or
cultivation of crops and animals, etc. My point
is, “nothings is truly new.” It is merely an
updated version of an already existing product
or service. In the case of virtue, it’s not as
though one becomes an updated version of
someone else’s character, you only tend to
exhibit the same character in a different measure
(either being deficient or being excessive). I
hope you’re not getting confused? Please stay
with me.
I’m just trying to point out the concept of
character. Character is the major factor that
sustains relationships of all sorts.
Imagine a person who always knows what to
say, can diffuse a tense situation, deliver tough
news gracefully, is confident without being
arrogant, brave but not reckless, generous but
not extravagant. This is the type of person that
everybody wants to be around. Although it
sounds impossible but Aristotle believed it was
possible and necessary. The virtue theory is all
about character and he believed that if we can
just focus on being good people, the right
actions would follow, effortlessly.
As we proceed, it is vital to note that the
definition of the term “value” is guarded by
diverse beliefs, interests and individual
understanding. This is why I would oblige you,
YES! You!!! To attempt stepping into my mind
in order for you to see things through my eyes.
I’d like to define the term “value” as the state
where one holds in high esteem or sets as a
priority any noun. With that said, according to
my dictionary, it also means the quality
(positive or negative) that renders anything
desirable or valuable making one have high
regards for it, but then it’s an ideal accepted by
some individuals or groups.
The concept of value is beautiful. As regards the
subject of the matter which is you and I,
“VALUE” is made visible in our character, our
actions and reactions, our speech and sense of
reasoning, and so on. We all know how our
minds are a reflection of our path in life, which
includes; environment, associations, personality,
and exposures. These factors, which in most
cases are being overlooked, are truly essential in
relationships of any kind. Now this feels like
“déjà vu”.
So, just like this, we will be cutting across other
terms which are vital properties in this book.

RESPECT

Ok… this term made me laugh so hard and I

apologize if that sounded a bit offensive to you.
But then again, in this part of the country where
I’m from, we love using this word “respect” in
almost all situations. Primary school children
use this word a lot too, not because they
understand the word but because the society
has defined what respect is, who respect is for
and even possible scenarios that alerts them
about its absence. To further explain this
ideology of the majority in the simplest term,
“respect is when somebody does exactly what
you want them to do as long as they are younger
than you in respect to age!”
When we talk about respect, we should try
creating a replica of ourselves in our minds as
the recipient and deliverer of actions in any
possible scenario and distribute the results
equally to ourselves as well. By doing this,
anyone will be able to identify the border that
stands between what is truly respect and what
isn’t. I’m not here to constrain your ideology to
what respect should be or look like but to
present an image of what it is and then, leave
you with the decision to agree or disagree.
Defining ‘Respect’ is a huge deal, especially in
the observance and reality to all that it entails.
Respect is actually a courteous regard for
people’s feelings. It’s an act of honor and the
observance of a personality. This is what most
of us fail to note, which is the fact that respect is
not age restrictive. The word honor is something
every normal human being craves for either
directly or indirectly…(sighs). The word
‘honor’ denotes a tangible symbol signifying
approval or distinction in any and all spheres of
life. So, therefore, all I’m saying is this; respect
is a reciprocated act of virtue. This will guide
our decisions and give discretion to our actions.
Note, that all these actions and decisions
requires intelligence to actually be termed as
virtuous. Therefore, we’d be taking a bit of a
closer look at it.

INTELLIGENCE
Everyone would for some certain reasons
consider themselves as intelligent in different
spheres of life. This could also be seen as being
crafty for some persons. Craftiness isn’t
intelligence. There is diverse emphasis for this
term and I’d love to make emphasizes on two of
them which are acuteness and
comprehensiveness.
The term intelligence basically denotes the
ability to comprehend, to understand and profit
from experience. The word acuteness is a
sensitivity that is keen and highly developed,
and also, it is the quality of having a sharp edge
or point over things, while comprehensiveness
depicts the capacity to understand a broad range
of topics. Now, if we put all the definitions
together, we can say that intelligence is a highly
developed understanding on different aspects of
life that has given one a sharp edge over certain
sensitivity issues.

PERSPECTIVE
It’s funny to say but true in all sense that the
term ‘perspective’ is shaped from perspectives.
It is the accumulation of other people’s
perspectives. Hahaha… (sighs)
Alright, the word perspective has intriguing
definitions which had left me pondering for a
period of time on its accuracy. Note that, it is a
way of regarding situations or topics and so on,
which is true but on a much broader scope, it’s
the appearance of things which are similar to
one another being determined by their distance
from the viewer. With this, we can depict the
fact that most persons can be looking at a
particular abstract painting and or structure and
would not get the same capture, the same image
or picture in their head.
One thing I would like to point out to us is the
fact that perspective is owned by just one
individual. So, I can boldly say that we have a
total number of 7 billion and counting,
perspectives in existence. In our day-to-day
activities, we see how the perspective of
individuals play out in the decision making of
organizations, groups, politics, families, peers
and other diverse units of every country. It’s
one thing to have an opinion that is great and
it’s another thing for people to value your
opinion.
STORY TIME;
Now that we have gone through the process of
defining the word virtue, let's apply them. I, for
one, am moralistic (with strong beliefs about
what is right and wrong on how people should
behave) most times and because I cannot change
everyone to act like this or that, I teach the little
ones and those willing to listen what virtue is all
about and walk them through the process of
becoming a better version of themselves. The
first step of becoming virtuous is by becoming
honest with one's self.
This is a short story of how virtue and gratitude
earned me a free ride from work to the
supermarket and back to my doorstep. It was a
weekday and I was practically returning from
work, my friend Tolu had opted to foot my bills
to a particular distance where we’d spilt and
take different routes, which she did. So, I
boarded another vehicle and got to my second
stop where I met this driver. So, I asked him if
he was going towards the road to the
supermarket and he said he was. I opened the
car and sat at the passengers sit in front then
slammed the door shut. I noticed he was on a
call and he wasn’t whispering so, I was able to
pick up a few things from his conversation with
this person. He complained of having a
headache due to the stress from his work. After
he was done with the call and had hung up
already, I asked him if the headache was a bit
much and he just said “yes” but he could
manage it. Fortunately for him, I was a bit ill
and had taken my medications to work with me,
including some pain killers. So, I reached for
my handbag and took out the pain killers,
beckoned on him if he wouldn’t mind taking the
medicine and he took it from me in shock, there
was no place to buy water so, I offered him
mine. Well, he took the medicine and thanked
me for my kind gesture but I could still see the
shock on his face…(lol). It was as though his
face spoke these words, “where are you from
and who are your parents?”. The car was full
and we began to move, he kept on staring at me
like he’d seen a ghost but somehow it was so
funny to me that I couldn’t help but ask why he
was staring at me like I wasn’t a human being.
He just laughed and told me that I would not
understand even if he told me, and that he didn’t
tell me about the headache with the mind that
I’d react to it but I did. Well, he just kept saying
thank you until we arrived at my stop, where
every other passenger had to drop, as it was the
last bus stop. I gave him my money but he
refused to take it and asked me to wait until he
was done attending to the other passengers.
When he was done, he looked at me and said;
Driver: Where exactly are you going to?
Me: Oh! I’m just heading towards that
pharmacy along the round…what’s the name
again? Ehen bakan…bakangizo pharmacy.
Which was also a supermarket. He offered to
take me there and I declined his offer at first,
telling him not bother about that and that he
should just take the money, give me my change
and go and rest. Then I asked “how are you
feeling now? Has the pain reduced?” he said yes
and that he’s feeling better now. He insisted and
began driving me towards the pharmacy. I
thanked him and told him that I was truly
grateful for his kind gesture. We arrived at the
pharmacy within a minute, I then offered him
the money again. He told me not to worry. I
spent a few moments begging him to accept it
and that he shouldn’t over hype what I did. I, for
one, didn’t see what I did as a big deal but he
did. I got down from the vehicle and he said he
was also going to wait for me until I was done
purchasing the items I came for and he did as he
said despite my pleading. He reversed his car
and parked in the parking lot. I did spend quite
some time inside the supermarket and at the
counter due to the crowd that was there before
me so I had to wait my turn. When I was done, I
rushed out knowing he parked and must have
been waiting for me. He was still waiting and he
wasn’t upset at all, even when I tried to
apologize for taking so much time, he appeared
more surprised and began asking me a few
personal questions. But wait a minute, the first
thing he said before those questions came
flooding in was; “I’m just thanking GOD for
your life”. These words made my day. He
continued “I’ve just been asking myself
different questions on how a person like you
still exists in this kind of world.” I just smiled
and said “Sir I’m very much a human being in
this world, I’m real and I exist.” I explained
how personal convictions and decisions can
shape one’s life and mold them into the people
we see in our daily lives. Well, I just kept
thanking God for the free ride even as I
remained grateful for that man’s act of kindness
and gratitude.
MORAL LESSONS;
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CHAPTER
TWO
VIRTUE IS FICTION
Well… look who finally made it to the second
chapter of the book. WELCOME!!!
And if you’re like me, you must have skipped
the other write ups to get to the good stuffs or to
know what that catchy phrase is all about and if
your guilty of this, I’d urge you to be patient,
take the time to read through from the start and
perhaps go through the preface too. Oh! And by
the way, I no longer read books like that
anymore…(laughs), so learn from me.
So many opinions, so many concepts, so many
perspectives on what virtue is or should be. I
won’t bore you anymore with the definition of
virtue but I’d like to just put it out there for
reference’s sake. The word ‘virtue’ depicts a
balance of acts and decisions between good and
bad, right and wrong, being efficient and
deficient in diverse feature and character. Now,
how many of you believe that non-fictions are
first fictions before transcending into reality?

What are fictions?

According to this definition, they are literary
works based on imagination and not necessarily
on facts. This is talking about fantasy and
fables. But then again, may I remind you all,
that the idea of “a man flying” was at some
point a fantasy? Another key thing I’d like to
point out from this definition is the word
“imagination”. Our imaginations are wild,
absurd, and unimaginably creative. It is more of
a strength if you ask me. At this point, you most
definitely are wondering, “wetin concern virtue,
concern fiction now for this matter?”.
Alright I’ll tell you…
Virtue remains a thing of the mind for most
people and has remained trapped there up until
this moment. You keep thinking to yourself that
only persons from a morally sound home can be
virtuous You think it’s meant for those with a
stable foundation. Well, that’s all wrong! Many
of us trap abilities, values, potentials and talents
because we do not believe that it could be
possible. Everything that has ever been brought
to existence was once a fiction. Bravery, love,
compassion, respect, intelligence and all these
other virtues were conceived before they could
even germinate, bloom and as well, come into
existence.
“Virtue is metamorphic”. It’s a striking
change in appearance, character or
circumstance. My point is this, there’s a very
thin line between fiction and non-fiction, and
that line is what I choose to tag as “conviction
or belief”.
Becoming virtuous is not impossible. It just
takes consistency to master. It’s not an absurd
topic to consider as important to be thought. IT
IS IMPORTANT! Yes, it is undeniably up to
you to consider and adopt a virtuous lifestyle.
Bringing us back on track that’s if we ever went
off track, fiction here is a starting point for
possibilities. I don’t think you got that… I said
“fiction is a starting point for possibilities”.
A little boy once said; “I wanna build the
world’s largest submarine where people could
live in and have houses in it. Kinda like a
moving city under the sea.” AMAZING IDEA!
Isn’t it?
Everyone can imagine a lifestyle of virtue, a life
without stress, where people are considerate and
kind, a world where there are no thieves, no
killers, with totally sane relatives. Well, my dear
reader, I wouldn’t tell you that it’s going to be
impossible if we all take the decision to be
much more virtuous. No, I won’t!
The truth is this; we need to know what being in
darkness looks or feels like in order to
appreciate the value and existence of light.
Everything is interconnected. There would
never be anything like good if bad was
undefined. Yin and Yang are a Chinese dualistic
cosmology that best describes the concept of
virtue as a balance between good and bad, right
and wrong.
Learn to use your imaginations, cultivate
positive thoughts, belief and attempt to make the
right decisions. Be wise. Remember that
fictional works are formed or conceived by our
imagination. One must know that not everyone
can be virtuous. You can hardly find a human
being who knows the right thing to do and say at
the right time and to the right person and in the
right scenario.
What’s a norm?
It’s a standard, model and or pattern regarded as
typical. There’s something known as “a social
norm” and it is formed through a process called
“socialization”. We learn about these norms
from our family, friends, schools and the society
at large throughout our lives’ journey. Norms
might be perspective (encouraging positive
behaviors; for example, “be gentle”) or
proscriptive (discouraging negative behavior;
for example, “do not cheat”). Norms are
important for their contribution to social order.
Norms are not necessarily promulgated at all.
Human beings need norms to guide and direct
their behavior, and provide order, and a mutual
understanding of each other’s actions. There’s a
lot to know concerning norms that cannot be
over emphasized. Just remember that we are all
a product of norms that have been able to guide
our relationships with one another.
Right and wrong existed before I was born and I
say so with an understanding of the norms in my
society. There are things which I might end up
seeing as right or things I would grow to love
doing that could appear as wrong in my society,
I could get punished, if I am found guilty. With
that said, nothing in this world is being done
anyhow. There is always a pattern to everything,
believe it or not.
 CHAPTER
THREE

ETHICS AND RELIGION.

Virtue as an ethical concept;
Before we proceed with this chapter, I’d like to
point out the fact that I am not here to portray
superiority of anything. So, keep an open mind
to learn and get that which is most important. I
have chosen to draft and draw wisdom from the
sources made available to me and with that said
I’d end it with this, I am unashamedly a firm
believer of Christ.
Now, Ethics are based and centered on logics
and reasonings rather than traditions or
injunctions. Notwithstanding, the word
“ethical” depicts a trail from the word
“tradition”. With this, I could say that “charity
begins at home” … IYKYK.
Virtue does not belong to an ethical person nor
does it belong to moralistic people. Although
this concept could be applied on all aspects and
or spheres of our lives, it could never be fully
classified or sidelined to a specific field, people,
cultural background, educational platform and
so on. Now, you know how your 5 sense organs
function and how they help you decipher what
the body is comfortable with or not? Yeah, I’d
like to give you a few new sense organs to work
with and familiar ones which you use but barely
take note of. Let’s begin. 95% of you are less
aware of them compared to the other 5% of the
population. Please note that these analyses are
self-generated and as it is my own medium to
passing the message, I intend to relate to you.
Now, these sense organs are practically
intangible and invisible to human eyes; they are
“our hearts” and “our minds”.
Our hearts operate majorly on emotions, while
our minds focus or is primarily controlled by
logic and facts. Well, these sense organs are
meant to serve as a guide to everyone when
taking any decision for one’s self as well as
their fellow human being. These are the sense
organs that has assisted culture, traditions and
religions from diverse races and ethnic
background to construct, cultivate and develop
what they see as wrong and right amongst their
circle and various groups in existence.
Virtue is a religious concept;
There are diverse religious structures and
beliefs, and each one of them believe that they
are on the right track towards spiritual
satisfaction and identity without an ounce of
doubt. Another thing that seems to be similar
amongst these religious majority is their
cultivation of a sort of moral value, that is,
virtues in their offspring, all as a result of their
belief system. Hindu, Atheist, Jews, Christians,
Muslims, Islam, Buddhist and so on, all pass
down their various beliefs, religion, traditions,
practices, food recipes, do’s and don’ts to their
offspring and the pattern will be repeated as
long as they all reject and regard every other
opinion, religion, information, practices and so
on as faulty, false, wrong and unbeatable
compared to their current belief and perspective.
In Christianity, what they regard as ‘virtues’ can
be seen to be embedded in the 7 fruits of the
Holy Spirit as seen in Galatians 5:22-23 (KJV);
“But the fruit of the Spirits love, joy, peace,
longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
meekness, temperance: against such there is no
law.” But then again, there are 4 basic virtues
which are; prudence, temperance, fortitude, and
justice. These virtues are not just upheld by
Christians alone but is also seen to be a part of
these other religions. Despite the diversity in
religious backgrounds, virtue breaks the barrier
and forms a common bound for everyone first
off as humans, before anything else.
With that being said, virtue becomes a
consciously imbibed principle first. When one
has a set guide for his actions, and stays
consistent with it, then it gradually
metamorphosis into becoming a habit or in other
words, “a lifestyle”. A lifestyle is like a tattoo
drawn on one’s body by themselves. Tattoos are
permanent. The process of getting them is
painful. They are worn and carried by people of
diverse race and background. Tattoo means
‘stigma’ in Latin which isn’t positive and can
also occur to anyone, at anytime and anywhere
in the world.
In a nutshell, virtue is for everybody. We all
need them to be happy and live with less weight
on our shoulders and in our minds. By
recognizing the importance of virtues in our
lives, it will lead to better communication,
understanding and acceptance between us and
our fellow man.
If you could recall a few things from when you
were much younger, even if you never grew up
with your biological parents, there were a few
things you were told not to do and rather do.
These things were not usually taught to us out of
a conscious mind of molding you into a certain
kind of person but rather, from a subconscious
place of norms and all of that sort. Only a few
persons work with the consciousness of shaping
certain impressions, character, and, or image for
themselves and those around them, including
their kids, if they have any so to say. Parents
would want their children to look like them,
probably not in every aspect but definitely their
good looks, admirable characteristics and
personality. So, in essence, all I’m saying is,
there is a subconscious YOU who will remain
unconsciously virtuous and until you tap into
that virtue consciously and cultivate it, this
world will remain as it is. If every individual
works towards becoming a better version of
themselves each and every day, one by one, it
would only take time but this world will become
a better place as we are the only chance this
world has to thrive gracefully.
HOW MANY PERSONS STILL VALUE
VIRTUES?
Well, the answer is quite easy and may I say
obvious, not much persons actually value
virtues. But then again, you could still say that a
lot of persons value virtue.
The problem here is that they value others who
possess these virtues but they’d never consider
cultivating them for themselves. It’s like having
a project in school and not wanting to put in the
work but rather taking the easy way out by
handing it over to a friend or just copying from
someone who has put in the efforts to getting
the answers. People seek to be loved but find it
hard to love, they want to be gifted with
beautiful thing but barely do it for others, they
want to be respected and simply cannot respect
anyone no matter how old and or young these
people tend to be… and lots more.
As seen in various countries, they exhibit
virtuous attributes differently and in diverse
measures. A country that has stood out for me
till date remains “South Korea”. I am not trying
to say that other countries lack integrity but
rather to say that the citizens should value
themselves and spread that love and respect for
self to their neighbors and fellow citizen and
then, across their borders.
Do not neglect the importance of virtuous
attributes, first, to self and then to others,
irrespective of their race and, or gender.
CHAPTER
FOUR
REPUTATION, RELATIONSHIP AND
RESPONSIBILITIES.

For the sake of a briefing, a little introduction

will be given as regards to each term.
Gradually gliding into what relationships depict,
we would see that it is the way in which two or
more people and, or things are connected. There
are different kinds of relationships and I will
only be considering a few. Moving on to the
following term which is responsibility, this is
actually a state or fact of being accountable. But
then again, responsibility means YOU doing the
things you are supposed to do and accepting
every outcome from your decision.
In the moment of reminiscing, I got to
understand by observation and experience how
most humans act and why they reacted the way
they did in certain situations and, or scenario’s,
why do people value reputation, relationships
and their responsibility so much?
It’s funny how I had to experience every aspect
and chapter of this book while writing it as
though I was scripting my future and playing
them out as I wrote, or probably, it was a test on
my level of growth. But, there’s one thing I
believe, which is the necessity for anyone who
speaks truth to be first-hand participants and
recipients of their words and teachings. Now, to
be honest, these experiences where both
annoying, aggravating, and torturing to “GO
THROUGH”. But I had to actually go through
all that to know and be prepared to guide others
who might pass through the same path. I cried, I
felt sad at times, I questioned why I had to go
through all these in the same year as my
beautiful father died. It wasn’t so pleasing but it
had to happen so the right and adequate
pressure, heat and tension would be applied to
my body, soul and my spirit in order to produce
an admirable result and heighten the quality of
my personality in general.
I had to experience hurt on diverse levels of my
life; by friends, family members, both nuclear
and extended, people who were close to me and
constantly found themselves around me and
who have somehow managed to form a bond or
two with me… Well, in a nutshell, they
managed to hurt me in ways they may or may
not have realized but it happened that way. On
the other hand, I was gifted with sensible and
like-minded friends and another thing too was
that I was blessed with an amazing mother as
well who helped me do what was right, always
bombarding me with good advice which in the
moment wouldn’t sound so helpful at the
moment, would turn out to return peace back to
me, because I’ll admit that I’m nowhere close to
perfect. The fact that I wish to become a better
version of myself helped me submit to authority.
REPUTATION
Within the context of reputation, a lot could be
said but still, it remains a widespread belief or
an opinion that is generally held about a person
or something, whether it be favorable or not.
Therefore, it is necessary to note that, it takes
many good deeds to build a good reputation,
and just one wrong to lose it all.
Our reputation is an identity that qualifies or
disqualifies us for a certain office, position,
right and what not. It is that sense of being that a
person possesses which in turn commands
respect and in other situations, disrespect. This
is why our words, actions and reactions to
things can curve and carve a certain kind of
image or picture of us in the eyes of those who
sees us.
You know the saying that, you’d be addressed
due to the way you dress?, Its in your
presentation that your recommendation will be
birthed. Presentation in speech, in character, in
charisma and so on. It’s vital that our reputation
stays remarkable. Your acquaintance and
network would be visible evidence of the kind
of reputation you possess.

RELATIONSHIPS
I, for one, value relationships so much and I
cannot over emphasis this particular context
because relationships come and go, bloom and
grow, wither and fades away, all this are bound
to occur under the law of time and change.
Note this; we learn to choose future
relationships from experiences of the first
relationship we did not have the luxury of
choosing, “OUR FAMILY”. It is true and I do
believe that a good number (all) of us did not
choose their biological parents and neither did
our parents have the luxury of choosing us as
well, we could not choose the gender and
personality of our siblings, who grandpa and
grandma, as well as our ancestors were, etc. but
the best and the worse part about it is that this
particular context seem to shape over 50% of
our personality.
Note that we do not consciously choose the first
phase of ‘relationship’ we tend to experience,
but we do get to choose the next phase of
relationships we would experience in our life
time, such as; our peer group, and spouse. All
this means that, relationships are very important
from how it is formed to how it is being
sustained, and like it or not, we have a role to
play. This is where our virtuous qualities stand
out the most. The company you keep will affect
the presence or absence, deficiency or efficiency
of the already existing virtues in you.
Growing up, I have always been blunt, to a
fault. I would speak truths not minding how
they would be perceived but as I aged, alongside
my acquisition of knowledge, I realized that
there were much more preferrable ways of
reacting to situations and presenting facts. This
understanding helped me stay mentally and
physically at peace with myself and others
around. I came to also understand the
importance of those persons from my first phase
of experience in relationship, that is my family.
In building other phases of relationship, one
must have the following; self-esteem, strong
will, stable principles, and the ability to think of
himself. In a nutshell, your physical, spiritual,
emotional and intellectual background should be
standard and stable.
Like I stated earlier to not overemphasize this
context of relationships. My advice to everyone
reading this blessed content is to notice, create
and preserve relationships of like mind, that will
promote our journey to become better person for
ourselves first and then for those around us.
 THE AUTHOR’S VIEW

There’s none of you reading this book who

could tell that these pages were birthed in tears,
I struggled to love myself years back, I
struggled to be around people, I had to pass
through diverse processes that tested my virtue.
I was depressed and felt lost to an extent where I
considered ending this beautiful and blessed life
of mine in the year 2017. Why am I saying this?
Because I’m trying to let you know that I
wouldn’t have been the author of this book if
not for the saving grace of God.
To explicitly understand the author’s view, you
need to know a little bit about the author. I
began writing this book unknowingly to me at
age 14, went through depression at age 17 and
began learning self-worth since then. I saw
reasons why my life should be different. The
reality and content of this book are actively
growing in me. I will not take the glory for who
I am today because the one who helped me to
attain these levels of admirable qualities is the
Holy spirit. He alone can help you adequately
exercise and attain fully the virtuous qualities
you intend to emulate.
Moving on, … Yes, I am trying to see that I
help you become better versions of yourself but
I do not condemn you if you’re the total
opposite of everything in this book. It sounds
strange, right? Well, I want you to be able to
relate with another person in an atmosphere of
little to no negativity, although it’s difficult as in
“it’s easier said than done” kind of way but we
could at least try.
My inspiration to write this book flowed from a
lot of pain, love and my desire for growth in
myself but most importantly, in others too. The
Holy spirit cannot be side lined from this
concept because “He is virtue”.
The pain I felt while writing this book was
passed from people I least expected and I
believe that those who hurt me never knew that
I ever got hurt, offended or affected deeply by
their actions and I understand better now, so,
we’re fine. Although, I never really spoke about
my hurt to everyone but I’ll admit that speaking
up to someone who’s trust-worthy is the first
stage of healing and getting rid of the hurt if
channeled rightly. Virtue grows just as our
negative traits begin to decrease as well.
Virtue is born out of an understanding of
humanity. In the course of writing this book, I
noticed along the line that I had undergone
series of situations which tested my character
and questioned my reasoning concerning the
necessity of having virtue. I, myself struggled
with making the right decision and being the
better person in most of these situations and in
characters as well.
I also had to interact with a few friends of mine
who had a contradictory conviction from mine,
who thought it was unnecessary to write this
book and to leave it up to people and their
decisions, perspectives and beliefs to guide
them. Well, my dear friends, I still wrote the
book. (Smiling…)
Sometimes, we fail to understand that
everything about man(humans) is being
influenced by something, somewhere, someone,
sometime ago. It lies in the information we tend
to come in contact with as we grow, learn and,
or change which in reality, has actually just
been passed down from generations and
probably altered at some point. But my point is
that we learn from someone else, somewhere
else and somehow which isn’t self. The
principle of influence is subtle and can occur
through different mediums and platforms such
as this book right here. We become who we are
through diverse streams of influence. If you’re
confused by the previous sentences, go read the
first sentence which began this paragraph.
My personality isn’t at its best yet but I intend to
keep improving no matter what I go through in
this journey called “life”. I do say the wrong
things at times but I do understand that I have to
make amends which I will always try to do by
the grace of God. Remember to Stay teachable
and you’d go far in life. Much love my dear
reader and my prayers are with you on your
journey to becoming a better person.
 LOVE,
DICKEY E. CHIOMA.
___________
SIGNATURE.