How To Get Any Woman To Love Going Down On You
How To Get Any Woman To Love Going Down On You
How To Get Any Woman To Love Going Down On You
No matter what your blow job status is right now, there’s a very good
chance that with these step-by-step techniques, you will be able to
turn your lady into an oral enthusiast.
If you are ashamed of your desire, it’s time right now to let that go. If
you feel guilty or embarrassed, why would your partner even want to
participate?
A man and woman’s bodies are designed for oral sex. Our mouths and
genitals line up perfectly for hours of blissful sucking and licking.
Most people are just not yet aware that this erectile tissue exists. But
it does!
Just as you feel more delicious sensation in your cock when it gets
hard (engorged or filled with blood), she feels that same exquisite
In addition, your lady will enjoy giving head because she likes the
feeling of power she gets from making you erect. She enjoys the
textural changes of your cock, first soft in her mouth and then
hardening with her creative strokes, laps, licks and suckling.
She appreciates the trust you give her when you make yourself
vulnerable.
She likes to see the joy on your face and hear the moans of your
satisfaction as proof of her sexual desirability.
She, like you, wants the closeness and intimacy that’s shared
between lovers during oral sex.
She feels like a beautiful, sexual goddess when she’s mastered the art
of fellatio.
As a man, it’s your role as the sexual leader to get her so comfortable
and tuned in to her sexual desire that oral sex is just one of the
everyday fun parts of making love with you.
You can take her from frosty to frisky if you think about the process
as a series of baby steps. Getting her to worship your cock is an
escalation, a series of small wins, skill-building and confidence-
boosting strategies that are fun for both of you.
Let’s assume the worst case, which is that she refuses, doesn’t want
to, doesn’t like it and believes oral sex is just something guys think
they should have because they’ve seen it on porn.
For many women, their personal experience informs them that it’s
dirty, good girls don’t suck cock and none of their girlfriends like it or
do it to their husbands, so why should you get it?
They feel perfectly justified turning you down because they think it’s
only done out of servitude or submission. Women who have no
experience to the contrary can’t imagine that a woman would even
enjoy sticking a penis in her mouth.
So the first thing you have to do is find out what her beliefs are and
where they came from. Because what you are going to do, mostly
through action and reward, is change what she believes. Her limiting
beliefs are holding her back.
In general — and yes, this applies to YOU — men try to get women to
do too much before they’ve laid in a foundation for her to feel
successful at giving head.
Do you expect that she should give you oral sex just because you
want it?
Do you control her mouth and head on your cock in any way that
makes her feel that she’s not in complete control?
In what ways might you have a bigger picture in your mind of the
outcome compared to hers?
Baby steps are the secret to slowly increasing her confidence and
pleasure until she realizes how sensual an experience oral sex can be
for her too, and not just for you.
I’ll get into the step-by-step approach you will take to get her to WANT
to give you oral sex on the next few pages. But before I do, let’s make
sure you understand the negative impact of the third biggest mistake.
You are going to be her teacher, her healer, her mentor, her advocate
and her protector in the bedroom. To understand her point of view,
The 3 Most Common Reasons She Doesn’t Want To Suck Your Cock
If limiting beliefs, fears and lack of experience — the 3 most common
reasons — are holding her back from desiring all kinds of sexual
experiences, then removing or fixing what’s causing those issues will
allow her body to naturally desire you in her mouth. Oral pleasure is a
primal desire. Oral sex is intrinsic to humans, but that desire gets
covered up by emotional or physical pain, fear or upset.
If she’s not telling you specifically why she’s not interested in oral
sex, talk more with her about it. You may have to gently help her
access her beliefs and feelings and get clear herself about why oral
sex has not interested her thus far in her life. Especially in light of
how important it is to you.
And please, don’t omit the steps outlined below in the script. Don’t
pluck out of this just the parts you want to use. Use this script in toto,
as it’s meant to convey love, acceptance, and openness while still
setting the boundary that oral sex is something important enough to
I want to know all the reasons why giving oral sex doesn’t appeal to
you or why you are not interested.
I can only guess at reasons, and I want to know what is true for you.
Tell me everything. There is nothing you can say that will hurt my
feelings, I will not take it personally because I know it is what is really
true for you and that is what I care about, making you happy and
making us happy together.
Please tell me your beliefs about oral. Did someone tell you it’s bad?
Please tell me your fears about oral. Are you afraid you don’t know
what to do? Are there any personal hygiene issues you need to tell me
about? Do you think you have to do it until I ejaculate and you are
turned off by my pre-cum or semen? What is oral sex in your mind
and what parts of it are not pleasurable about it when you think of it?
I truly want to find a way to bring you such pleasure and make you
feel so good and so relaxed and so turned on that you WANT to put me
in your mouth. What I don’t want to do is pressure you, upset you, or
make you worried or fearful.
I do not want to force you or for you to feel it’s your duty. But I do
want to tell you, with all honesty, that having the experience of
willing oral sex is very important to me and brings me sadness and a
feeling of lack and scarcity because I don’t have it in my life.
Let’s talk through these questions and please feel free to tell me the
whole truth of your thinking. I want to understand where you are on
this and how we can move forward slowly. And I adore you, my sweet
woman.”
Instead of judging her feelings, focus on opening her eyes to the bigger
picture. Oral sex is as intimate as intercourse. This is a big request
you’re making, especially if she’s afraid and inexperienced.
Is part of your holding back coming from feelings of not knowing what
to do?
Just keep asking her these kinds of questions. It’s likely there are a
number of reasons why she shies away from wanting to touch or
suckle your penis.
That’s why beliefs she’s taken for granted are holding her back from
the intimacy she would like to have. Questioning old beliefs is very
beneficial in establishing new beliefs that suit a person as they
mature, instead of holding blindly to beliefs that have been instilled
by others.
Be careful not to put her on the defensive. Remember, you are her
champion.
Going further with the example of a limiting belief handed down from
mother to daughter, what does she secretly believe as her true
feelings, if she removes her mother’s opinion?
Be Vulnerable Too
Please don’t think you’re immune to limiting beliefs either. Have the
same conversation with her about your own beliefs. I’m sure you can
both kill a few sacred cows.
Remember, your thoughts are just that. They are not true. They are
not real. They are just stuff your brain makes up to keep you safe.
Your brain is only one organ in your body — the one that wants to
keep you locked up in a cage of predicable, safe behavior.
Tell her how you pine for the feeling of her mouth on you. Explain
why it gives you so much happiness. Tell her what’s in your heart. Get
her to understand what it’s like to be you just as you spent time
understanding her perspectives. By making yourself vulnerable
about your natural, manly desires, you will warm her to you. This is
not “her issue,” it’s both your issue together.
Once you are both on the same page with regard to your combined
beliefs, you’ll be able to work around, fix or compromise to support
her needs and yours.
Listen up, dear man. I want to say this one more time for you. All the
techniques in the world won’t do you any good until you know what’s
in her mind. You won’t make any progress guessing. You’ll simply
confuse the situation more.
Time for a heart to heart talk about not only oral sex, but your whole
sex life with her.
You are the leader. Lead her to more sexual expression of the love you
share. There are so many subliminal message that hold women back
from their pleasure. Don’t ever stop being her hero. Bring her out of
her shell of fear and shame with your love and patience. Learn to love
To get to the heart of the matter, you must get to her heart and get
her out of her mind. Then her body’s natural wisdom will take over.
She can’t get out of her mind and into her body until you overcome
her fears and resistance issues.
Before I get to this powerful lick trick, let’s deal with your
“manscaping.” Manscaping is personal grooming, "down there." She is
not going to want to put her mouth in your fur patch. If you haven't
yet shaved your testicles and cut back your pubic hair close to your
body, it's time. You'll give yourself a "visual inch" when you groom
yourself and your lady will be much more inclined to play with your
equipment.
Shaver 1 trims the long hair close to your body without cutting you or
causing bumps. Cut a one inch circle all around the base of your shaft
so that she can get you all the way in her mouth without your pubic
hair scratching around her lips. Use the Femini to trim back all your
pubes and ball hair.
Shaver 2 is used after you shorten all the hair down. Shaver 2 trims
your hair right to the skin line, but doesn't lift and cut like a razor. It
does not cause ingrown hairs or bumps. Use the Cleancut after the
Femini to make yourself smooth for her.
Every time you shave your cock and balls, show them to her. “Look
honey, I’m smooth and clean in case you want to play.” And then leave
it at that. You want her to come to you out of desire, confidence and
interest instead of guilt or service. She’ll come around. You’ll see.
Dan would do an Irish Jig in Times Square buck naked to get more
“love” down there.
You were smart to seek out this step-by-step process that is designed
to do what it takes to make her appreciate and enjoy fondling, licking,
sucking and playing with your member.
If she doesn’t want to taste your semen, don’t come. Just enjoy the
licks and sucks and hold back your ejaculate. One day in the future
she will be ready for you to explode down her throat.
Many women feel just like Tanya, overwhelmed by the whole cock
sucking scenario.
She may feel that if she gives you a lick she’s obligated to get you all
the way off.
3 Little Licks is the first step to get her to wrap her lips around your
member for a brief moment.
Ask her if she is willing to give you “just three little licks.” Perhaps
she’ll take three sucks. Maybe she’ll just stroke your shaft and lap at
the head of your cock thrice.
No matter what she does, you must reward her progress with an
avalanche of appreciation. I’ll explain more shortly about the best
How can she turn down just 3 little licks? She really can’t. Unless you
screw up the trick by making this one huge mistake...
If she gives you three licks and then you whine or act dissatisfied and
want more, you will blow up any progress you made.
You must keep your word. You asked for 3 little licks. Be satisfied with
that and don’t push for more.
Whenever you are showered and your cock is well groomed, show it to
her and ask for 3 Little Licks. Then thank her profusely and put your
cock away. Keep reading and I’ll tell you exactly what to say for
maximum appreciation.
Over time, those three licks will turn into 3 minutes of licking. 3 Little
Licks is the bridge to her confidence. Just get her to try it, touch it,
and become familiar with it and she’ll be emboldened to try more.
Then add fuel to the fire by rewarding her for her efforts. The more
verbal appreciation you give her, the more cock appreciation you’ll
get.
The long-term way to start having off-the-hook oral with your partner
is through training each other. When you start to teach her what you
like... When you are happy with just a few little licks to start...
When your mindset is “puppy training”
and full of encouragement... When you
share your favorite moments with her
afterward and express your
appreciation... All of these behaviors
will enable her to gain the confidence
that will fuel her true love and desire
for pleasuring herself with your
member.
But where is that switch that flips her motivation from sucking your
cock out of duty or payback to actually being so turned on that she
craves cock in her mouth?
To get her on this virtuous cycle of good sex generating even better
sex you must slowly escalate her desire. The escalation goes from
romance to sensuality to seduction to advanced sexual mastery.
If she can only come once; if she can only come by using a vibrator, if
she has never experienced orgasms during intercourse or G-Area
orgasms... You have a wonderful opportunity to lead her to her sexual
potential.
Our online program, Revive Her Drive shows you exactly how to
move her up this curve.
But it’s not until she starts becoming multi-orgasmic and feeling good
about her own body that she will reach for your cock reflexively.
And I know that’s what you want. You want her to WANT you. You
want her to take her pleasure on you. You want to know there is not
duty or reciprocal guilt involved.
The single best path to orgasmically filling her up to the point where
her motivation switch flips to WANT instead of should is through an
Expanded Orgasm practice.
If she prefers to have orgasms from you giving her oral or from
intercourse and she can come multiple times from those modalities,
then keep doing that, of course. Or add in an Expanded Orgasm
practice to keep your sex life full of variety and erotic adventure.
That’s what keeps women excited - novelty combined with a bit of the
danger of something new.
If she’s having tons of orgasms from your finger strokes, tongue and
cock and you’re kissing her and letting her play with your cock as
much or little as she wants, this also will make her more orally
inclined.
Stimulating both “ends” of her glow stick will naturally stimulate her
oral responses.
Kiss her while you stroke her pussy with your hands.
Slide your fingers in her mouth to suckle as your face is buried in her
genitals.
Find ways to rouse her mouth and genitals at the same time and you
will turn her into a woman who LOVES to give oral.
Think about your job as awakening all that tissue equally in her lips,
tongue and mouth as you do her clitoris and vagina. Add her breasts
into your stimulation strategy and you’ll really get her body turned
on.
First of all, if you want her to be your naughty girl behind closed
doors, you have to approve of her behavior in the bedroom. If you
make her feel weird, dumb or embarrassed about anything, she’ll
snap shut and no more clam for you.
Verbal feedback is the easiest way to make her know that you
approve of her sexy ways and meet both of her biological needs.
And say things that let her know you find her irresistibly sexy:
“You have the most beautiful pussy of any women I’ve ever been
with.”
Give her non-verbal feedback too. Meet her gaze. Stroke her cheek.
Grab her ass. Moan, growl, sigh and say, “Yes, baby. Oh, that feels so
good.” “I love the way you touch me.” “You are my darling.”
All of this verbal approval increases her feeling that it’s safe to let go
and surrender to her natural sexual urges with you. And one of the
most primal urges is to suckle your cock.
“You have no idea how much I love watching you pleasure me in this
deeply intimate way.”
“I’m the luckiest man in the world right now to see your beautiful face
loving my cock.”
The more you offer your approval and appreciation the more she’ll
feel good about pleasing you. Just like filling her up with orgasms,
your masculine leadership —letting her know she’s doing a good job —
will flip her motivation switch to WANT you.
A woman wants to please a man who lets her know she’s sexually
irresistible, adored and good at sucking cock. It’s human nature.
You’ll be her best lover ever through patience, orgasmic fulfillment
and appreciation.
It’s imperative that you give her a lot of instruction and verbal
feedback, especially at first. Most women think they need to do long,
deep sucking strokes over and over and over because they’re oriented
toward the “goal” of making him come. But that gets boring and
besides, few women actually enjoy the ejaculate.
The best part about nurturing her so that she tries all kinds of moves
is that you are getting her out of a “prescribe” plan and into a more
creative state. When she’s rewarded for trying all kinds of licks, laps,
sucks, blows, slurps and tonguing moves, she’ll actually start to enjoy
herself.
When you’ll filled her up with orgasms AND she’s feeling confident
about giving you a variety of sensations the oral sex stops being a
“performance” and starts becoming EROTIC for her.
Step-By-Step Recap
Let’s put it all together. What are you going to do to get her to WANT
to give you head?
First you will let her know how important it is for you to have the
pleasure of oral sex in your life as you begin to understand what her
limiting beliefs are.
You will next begin to help her reframe her limiting beliefs, work
around them, fix any roadblocks and find compromises that work for
you both.
You will french kiss her frequently and play with her breasts in
addition to getting her clitoris and vulva fully engorged so that she’s
turned on from top to bottom.
You’ll ask for 3 Little Licks and reward her for it.
You will give her verbal appreciations that make her feel both
adored and sexually irresistible.
You will teach her different techniques that bring you pleasure so
she knows she’s doing a good job.
You will enable her confidence to the point where she’s very
turned on and begins to enjoy your cock for her own pleasure.
You will be one of the few men in the world who get the kind of
fellatio that fantasies are made of because you took the time to unlock
her natural, erotic desires.
Congratulations!
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Susan Bratton
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and sensuality advice for men in Dr. Patti Taylor
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Sloane Fox
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