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Communication and Soft Skills

Communication and soft skills

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Communication and Soft Skills

Communication and soft skills

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j5nh2hpftp
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© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
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SOFT SKILLS SOFT SKILLS

Unit I- Communication and Soft Skills

1 SOFT SKILLS
Need and Importance of Communication and Soft Skills

1.1 INTRODUCTION
Most organisations require that those who work in them have certain abilities that allow
them to do their jobs effectively. For example, photographers must understand how different
camera settings and lighting affect the picture they are taking, and computer programmers
need to know how to use Programming languages. These abilities are known as hard or
technical skills and to learn them one usually enrolls in some sort of educational programme
i.e. where they receive classroom instruction and often practical training as well.

However, to work in any occupation you also need what are referred to as ‘soft skills’ (often
referred to as ‘life skills’). Soft skills as opposed to hard skills (such as technical skills)
greatly impact the personality development of employees. Organisations today recognize that
the professional development of their employees plays an important part in maintaining
relationships with their customers, clients, suppliers, co-workers and developing a successful
business. However, soft skills are not a replacement for hard or technical skills. In fact,
they are complementary to them and serve to unlock the potential of people equipped
with hard skills.

The sooner the relevant soft skills are learned and developed the better. The learning stage of
these skills must start at least at the graduate school level – if not earlier. Today, companies,
while interviewing job seekers, are not really worried about the candidates’ technical or
domain depths. They know that they can teach them the most exotic technology effortlessly,
but they also know that the soft skills are the hardest to drive in. Hence the right time to
learn these is the time when you are preparing for your graduate/post-graduate programmes.

1.2 WHAT ARE SOFT SKILLS?


Soft skills are the personal character traits or qualities each of us has. They make us who
we are, generally encompassing our attitudes, habits and how we interact with other
people. They refer to abilities that make people better employees and open doors for many
opportunities that are not directly related to the subject matter of their jobs. In other words,
soft skills refer to a person’s ability to relate to others, to get him/her and others organised,
to communicate in written, spoken or other forms.

8
SOFT SKILLS SOFT SKILLS

Soft skills have been defined by the World Health Organisation as follows:

“These are the abilities for adaptive and positive behaviour that enable
individuals to deal with the demands and challenges of everyday life.”

UNICEF defines these skills (called life skills) as:

“A behaviour change or behaviour development approach designed to


address a balance of three areas: knowledge, attitude and skills.”

Soft skills include psycho-social abilities and interpersonal skills that help people take
decisions, solve problems, think critically, communicate effectively, build healthy relationships,
demonstrate qualities of leadership and team building, manage time effectively, and cope
with the stress and strain of life in a healthy and productive manner.

Essentially, there are two kinds of skills – those related to thinking called ‘thinking skills’
and skills related to dealing with others called ‘social skills.’ While thinking skills relate to
the personal level, social skills include interpersonal skills. It is the combination of these two
types of skills that are needed for achieving behaviour change and negotiating effectively.

1.3 NEED FOR SOFT SKILLS


Soft skills allow us to effectively and efficiently use our technical skills and knowledge.
They improve the way we interact with our bosses, co-workers and customers/clients. They
permit us to get our work done on time. They influence how we feel about our jobs and
how others perceive us.

Consequently, the demand for and reliance on soft skills is on the increase due to constant
change in the work environment, customer-driven market, information-based technology
and globalization.

The development of soft skills in this market is important as there is intense competition for
many available positions. The ability to develop and use soft skills can make the difference
between the achiever and the non-achiever.

9
SOFT SKILLS SOFT SKILLS

Earlier the focus of management was on ‘hard’ skills. The emphasis was on the technical
skills necessary to perform effectively. These skills tended to be more closely related to the
actual task being performed. But now every single occupation you can think of demands
that you have specific character traits. Moreover, an important thing to note is that soft
skills are transferable between occupations. While you may have to go back to school to
learn new technical skills if you change careers, you can always take your soft skills with
you since they are valued in a variety of fields.

Today, employers want people with efficient soft skills. These are key skills to effective
performance across all job categories. As the world has changed, and the nature of work
has changed, the skill set required of managers and other executives has changed.

Today’s business is all about people. It is about communication, relationships and about
presenting yourself, your company and your ideas in the most positive and impactful way.
Many business people like to think that success is based on logical, rational thoughts and
acts, but it is also to be remembered that the human element is as important as the skills
mentioned above. That is why a strong soft skills set is considered to be very important.

Reference:
Soft Skills - Manmohan Joshi

10
SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

2 PERSONALITY
Cluster DEVELOPMENT
of Personality Traits

2.1 WHAT IS PERSONALITY?


Personality is the way we look, feel and behave. It is the totality of a person’s being – not
merely the external appearance but also various other traits.

Personality includes the following:

™™Character traits:
• Integrity: a person’s honesty in dealing with others, loyalty to one’s beliefs, value
systems etc.
• Acceptance: by others who come into contact with a person, and recognizing
and accepting them as a whole.
• Discipline: refers to a person’s disciplined approach to life and work.
• Dedication: refers to the commitment a person shows towards the achievement
of individual as well as group goals.
™™Behavioural traits:
• Interpersonal skills: the way a person develops and sustains interpersonal relations
with all those he/she has dealings with – bosses, co-workers, fellow students,
customers/clients, suppliers, private and government organisations.
• Communication skills: refer to the effective way a person communicates with
others through various channels – writing, speaking, listening, and using positive
body language.
• Leadership qualities: refer to the qualities which help a person behave in a
leadership position – getting work done willingly, exercising participative leadership
style, and be a role model by setting example.
• Team management: refers to the effectiveness with which a person demonstrates
ability to build and manage team in order to achieve the desired goals and objectives.
• Stress management: the quality of keeping cool in stressful circumstances,
identifying the factors causing stress, and finding solutions to reduce – if not
eliminate altogether – the stressors.
™™Attitudes:
• Positive attitude: be able to have a positive attitude even in the face of difficulties
and impossible situations, and be willing to try out ideas in the face of obstacles
and hardships.
• Win/Win situation: be able to negotiate and bring around the other person
to an acceptable solution to a problem – thus creating a win/win situation for
both the parties.

11
SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

• Keep the end in mind: be able to focus on the ultimate end (goal) in mind
bypassing the various problems that may crop up on the way.
• Synergize: be able to combine or work together in order to be more effective,
or to make things or people do this.

2.2 TYPES OF PERSONALITY


There are several types of personality people have. Some of these are:

• Perfectionists: They are never satisfied till they achieve perfection. Sometimes
people forget that there is nothing which can be absolutely ‘perfect’; it may be
rather very close to the idea of being perfect. Such people are usually a source
of stress for themselves as well as for others working with them. However, such
people cannot be categorically criticized for aiming at total perfection as they tend
to achieve excellent results.
• Helpers: They are always willing to help others in times of need – with guidance,
advice, resources etc.

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SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

• Romantics: They are sometimes called dreamers and think of innovative ideas which
sometimes people think are impractical. But sometimes the craziest idea can lead
to a wonderful new design, product or service. Quite often the world moves on
the shoulders of dreamers! If we can’t dream, we can’t think, we can’t imagine, we
may not be able to act on some new idea.
• Achievers: These are the people who are determined to achieve what they have
planned for. They put all their efforts in performing to their utmost capacity, show
dedication to the task in hand, and ultimately reach their goal. It is the expected
sense of achievement that propels such people.
• Asserters: These people neither remain passive nor aggressive in any situation. They
rather assert their rights, respect the rights of others, and have the innate ability to
convince others and thus elicit cooperation from all.
• Questioners: They are ‘Doubting Toms.’ They question everybody’s opinion,
behaviour, ideas, way of working etc., and quite often are dissatisfied with the
outcome. Others quite often misunderstand such people and consider them to be
obstacles to progress.
• Adventurers: They are ever ready to take risks in order to reach their goal. No risk is
too big for them, and so they believe in experimentation with an adventurous spirit.
• Observers: There are some who are great observers of people and things around
them. They visibly – or surreptitiously sometimes – observe people, events, things,
environment etc., and are often a source of important information which others
might not have noticed. Quite often such people are good at analysing things,
events, people etc.
• Peacemakers: They avoid confrontational situations, and always take initiative in
making peace with different parties who may be at loggerheads with each other.

We cannot say that every individual can be categorized into only one of these. More often
than not, we have several characteristics common to the above-mentioned types. However,
one particular characteristic may be dominant in one person, and another in the other
person. So which one are you? Think about it!

2.3 PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT


Reference:
Personality development means enhancing and grooming one’s outer and inner self in order
Soft Skills - Manmohan Joshi
to bring about a positive change to their life. Each individual has a distinct personality that
can be polished, refined and developed.

13
English as Life Skill
English is not just a medium of communication; it is more of a life skill. Candidates looking for
jobs in sunrise sectors like IT, hospitality, retail and academia are expected to communicate well
in English.

Importance Of English Language


Language is our major means of communication; it is how we share our thoughts with others. A
language’s secondary purpose is to convey someone’s sentiments, emotions, or attitudes. English is
one such language in the world that satisfies both the above purposes. English has been regarded as
the first global Lingua Franca. It has become part and parcel of almost every existing field. We use it
as the international language to communicate in many fields ranging from business to entertainment.
Many countries teach and encourage youngsters to acquire English as a second language. Even in
nations where English is not an official language, many science and engineering curriculum are
written in English.
English abilities will most certainly aid you in any business endeavours you choose to pursue. Many
large corporations will only hire professional employees after determining whether or not they speak
good English. Given the language’s prominence, English language classes will be advantageous to
you if you want to work for a multinational organization and will teach you the communication skills
needed to network with professionals in your area or enhance your career.
The English Language opens an ocean of career opportunities to those who speak this language
anywhere in the world. Similarly, it has turned into an inevitable requirement for various fields and
professions like medicine, computing and more.
In the fast-evolving world, it is essential to have a common language that we can understand to make
the best use of the data and information available. As a result, the English Language has become a
storehouse of various knowledge ranging from social to political fields.

Reasons to Learn the English Language


As the importance of the English Language is clear now, we move on to why we must learn the
English Language. First of all, it is a global language. It is so common that one out of five people can
speak or understand this language.
Further, learning the English Language can help in getting a job easily. As it has become the language
of many fields, it automatically increases the chances of landing a good job in a good company.
In addition, it helps with meeting new people. As it is the official language of 53 countries, learning
it helps to break the language barriers. Most importantly, it is also the language of the Internet.
Another important reason to learn this language is that it makes travelling easier. Being a widely used
language globally, it will help you connect with people easily. Similarly, it is also essential in the
world of business.
It does not matter whether you are an employee or employer, it benefits everyone. Students who wish
to study abroad must definitely study this language. Many countries use their schools and universities.
So, it can offer a good opportunity for students.
Why and where do we need the English language?

 Use of English on the Internet – Because of the tremendous rise of information


technology, particularly the internet, English is the language of choice for Internet
users. The internet has also played an important role in promoting and spreading the
English language throughout the world, as more and more people are exposed to it, and
English has also become the language of the internet.
 Use of English in Education – English has become one of the majorly used languages
to understand, learn and explain concepts from various fields of knowledge. The
majority of instructional tools, materials, and texts are written in English. The global
educational systems at colleges all over the world need English as a foreign language.
 Use of English for Travel purposes – As we all know, English has been named as the
official language of 53 countries and over 400 million people in the world speak
English, the English language comes in handy for communicating with everyone when
anyone travels around the world be it for tourism, job opportunity, settlement, casual
visits, etc.
 Use of English for Communication – The most important function of a language is
to allow people to communicate effectively. For many years, English has been the most
widely known and valued language on the planet. In other words, English becomes an
efficient tool for communicating with people all over the world.

Conclusion
We use the English Language in most of our international communications. While it is not the most
spoken language in the world, 53 countries have named it their official language. Moreover, about
400 million people globally use it as their first language. Thus, being the most common second
language in the world, it will be beneficial to learn this language to open doors to new opportunities.
References:
Importance Of English Language Essay | 500 Words Essay (toppr.com)
Interpersonal Skills
What are interpersonal skills?
Interpersonal skills are the set of skills we use to interact and communicate with others.
We demonstrate interpersonal skills whenever we engage with people around us, and they
determine our ability to build relationships and work with others.
Having strong interpersonal skills can improve your ability to do well in interviews and build
productive, long-lasting relationships in your personal and professional life.
Why are interpersonal skills important?
Most of what we do in life requires interaction with other people. In order to be successful in your
career or have meaningful friendships, it’s critical to be good at getting along with others. While
interpersonal skills are often considered to be something that comes naturally, that you’re either
blessed with them or not, the truth is that they can be learned.
When you’re applying for jobs, it’s easy to focus on all of your hard skills and forget about the
importance of including soft skills like your interpersonal abilities.
Strong interpersonal skills are a key indicator of success in a working environment. Benefits can
include, for example, the ability to:
 Cooperate with teammates to solve difficult problems
 Build collaborative relationships with colleagues
 Understand and meet the needs of clients and customers
 Effectively lead and manage others
On the other hand, lacking interpersonal skills can lead to miscommunication or
misunderstandings with coworkers or management that have the potential to lead to bigger
conflicts.
Improving your interpersonal skills can help you to foster a harmonious workplace, mend any
relationships that are disruptive to your ability to work effectively, and free up your time and
energy to focus on doing your best work.
How to improve Your Interpersonal Skills
Once you know where you stand, it’s time to start planning out how to improve your interpersonal
skills. Some of the best ways to improve are:
 Monitor your body language and ensure you’re not doing things that make people think
you’re disengaged or aggressive (crossing your arms, looking around, avoiding eye
contact, etc.)
 Practice active listening with family, friends, and co-workers – repeat what they’ve said
back to them to ensure you’re accurately listening
 Try being friendly and chatty with colleagues
 Practice leading a meeting or presentation
 Be enthusiastic and engaged when interacting with people
 Project an image of being confident and approachable
References:
Interpersonal Skills | SkillsYouNeed
Self-Esteem
What is Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem is how a person views oneself within the world. Oftentimes, this is how a person
measures their worth or value to the world or the people around them. Self-esteem can affect
many elements of a person's life, such as self-confidence, relationships, motivation, and
emotional or mental well-being.
Self-esteem refers to a person’s overall sense of his or her value or worth. It can be considered a
sort of measure of how much a person “values, approves of, appreciates, prizes, or likes him or
herself” (Adler & Stewart, 2004).

According to self-esteem expert Morris Rosenberg, self-esteem is quite simply one’s attitude
toward oneself (1965). He described it as a “favourable or unfavourable attitude toward the self”.

Types
People who have low self-esteem can often struggle with their quality of life. They may believe
they are unworthy of love, affection, or praise and have low motivation.
People who have overly high self-esteem may have an inflated sense of their own abilities and
skills, which could lead to feeling entitled to receive things they did not earn. Both people with
low and overly high self-esteem may struggle with relationships.
People who have healthy self-esteem can maintain healthy relationships, complete difficult tasks,
and have a realistic view of themselves, their skills, weaknesses, and needs.

What is the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence?


Self - esteem leads to self-confidence.

For example, increasing your self-esteem produces the desired effect of greater self-confidence.

So, think of self-esteem as being the way in which you think about yourself, and the way in

which you think about yourself naturally makes you either more self-confident or less confident.

"Self-esteem" is composed of the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs we hold about ourselves. Since
our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs change all the time, our self-esteem is also constantly
evolving. Having low self-esteem can have a negative effect on your mental health, relationships,
and school or career life. However, there are a number of ways to feel better about yourself and
boost your self-esteem.
Improving Your Self-Esteem
1. Identify and Challenge Your Negative Beliefs
2. Identify the Positive About Yourself
3. Build Positive Relationships—and Avoid Negative Ones
4. Give Yourself a Break
5. Become More Assertive and Learn to Say No
6. Improve Your Physical Health
7. Take on Challenges

The Importance of Small Steps

It is very unlikely that you will go from poor to good self-esteem overnight.

Instead, you will probably find you make small improvements over a period of time. The key is
to look over the long term, rather than day-to-day, and focus on the big picture, not the detail of
how you felt at a particular moment yesterday.

When you feel good, or you do something good, celebrate it—but don’t beat yourself up if you
occasionally slip back into negative patterns of thinking. Just pick yourself up again and try to
think more positively. Eventually, this will become a habit and you will find that your self-
esteem has quietly got better.

Reference:

Improving Self-Esteem | Skills You Need


Positive Thinking
Positive thinking is the idea that you can change your life by thinking positively about things.

This idea can sound a bit soft and fluffy, which is something of a problem for many people who
recognise that just thinking good thoughts won’t change the world and therefore discard the whole
idea.

However, research shows that positive thinking really does have a scientific basis. You can’t
change the world, but you can change how you perceive it and how you react to it. And that can
change the way that you feel about yourself and others, which can in turn have a huge effect on
your well-being.

Positive thinking doesn't mean that you ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just
means that you approach unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the
best is going to happen, not the worst.
Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts
that run through your head. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your
self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you
create because of lack of information or expectations due to preconceived ideas of what may
happen.
If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely
pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist — someone who
practices positive thinking.

Focusing on positive thinking


You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking. The process is simple, but it does
take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Following are some ways to think
and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

 Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more
positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you usually think negatively
about, whether it's work, your daily commute, life changes or a relationship. You can
start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way. Think of a
positive thought to manage your stress instead of a negative one.
 Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking.
If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive
spin on them.
 Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during
difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you
feel less stressed.
 Follow a healthy lifestyle. Aim to exercise for about 30 minutes on most days of the
week. You can also break it up into 5- or 10-minute chunks of time during the day.
Exercise can positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel
your mind and body. Get enough sleep. And learn techniques to manage stress.
 Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive,
supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative
people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress
in healthy ways.
 Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to
yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself.
If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with
affirmations of what is good about you. Think about things you're thankful for in your
life.
Practicing positive thinking every day
If you tend to have a negative outlook, don't expect to become an optimist overnight. But with
practice, eventually your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You
may also become less critical of the world around you.
When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're better able to handle everyday stress in a
more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of
positive thinking.
Reference:
Positive Thinking | SkillsYouNeed
Motivation
Mr Alison Doyle has described Motivational skills in the workplace can be defined as
actions or strategies that will elicit a desired behaviour or response by a stakeholder.
Motivational tactics will vary according to the style of the motivator, their relationship with the
target of the motivation, and the personality of the individual to be motivated.
Steps in the Motivational Process
1. Assessing the preferences and personality characteristics of the individual or group to be
motivated. 2. Defining motivational strategies appropriate for that target.
3. Conveying expectations for performance to or achieving desired outcomes from the object of
the motivation.
4. Communicating benefits, rewards, or sanctions if expectations are (or are not) met.
5. Providing feedback regarding progress or lack of progress towards desired outcomes.
6. Addressing problems or obstacles that are limiting success.
7. Providing rewards for desired outcomes.
8. Issuing warnings prior to enacting sanctions.
Tips for Improving Motivational Skills
There are many specific techniques that can be used to increase motivation, here are some of
them:

 Motivating Others - An important skill for managers is to be able to motivate other workers.
In order to enhance productivity either of the following ways can be chosen:
 Rewards - Giving out rewards for good work can be a great way to motivate employees
to work harder.
 Recognition - While money and other financial rewards are nice, some people are
motivated by the chance of being recognized for their skills.

 Self-motivation - In addition to motivating others, we can be benefitted by motivating


ourselves.
 Goals - Having goals that are being worked toward can be a great way for a person to
motivate themselves to work harder.
 Strength - When a person is able to identify things that make them stronger, it can really
help with motivation.
Reference:
Soft Skills-3 (osou.ac.in)
SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT
Creativity
2.7 CREATIVITY
It means to:

• Perceive the world in new ways;


• Find hidden pattern in things, situations and behaviours;
• Make connections with unrelated phenomena; and
• Generate solutions and act on them.

2.7.1 PROCESS OF CREATIVITY

There are two steps to creativity:

• Thinking: Think of an idea, an approach which is either different from others or


altogether new.
• Producing: Convert your idea into action.

If you have ideas but do not act on them, you are imaginative but not creative.

2.7.2 INNOVATION

It is an extension of one’s creativity, and means implementation of a new or improved:

• Product;
• Service; or
• Process.

Moreover, any innovation should be able to create value in order to be acceptable.

2.7.3 BARRIERS TO CREATIVITY

Creativity can take a back seat if one faces the following barriers:

• Making assumptions: You are prepared to look at all aspects and make your own
assumptions, and do not care for others’ feedback or ideas.
• Over-reliance on logic: If you are over-reliant on your logical thinking, you
create obstacles to new thought or approach. Everything cannot be achieved only
by logic. Whereas logic opposes, a hunch, a dream can become reality through
experimentation.
• Cultural barriers: Sometimes some people are unable to involve themselves in tasks
that require a creative approach on account of cultural barriers – fear of castigation
from the community or orthodox religious beliefs.

20
SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

• Emotional barriers: A lot of people have strong emotional approach to changing


the existing pattern of things and remain attached to the old order without realizing
that change is the only constant factor in life. This feeling of emotional attachment
to the existing order creates obstacles to creativity.
• Perceptual barriers: Our perceptions play a crucial role in our approach to creativity.
If we have a mental block with respect to the ways things could improve by using
creative and innovative methods, we just cannot be creative.
• Resource barriers: In order to create something several resources may be needed,
and if we have a resource crunch, we won’t be able to proceed further.
• Stress: Any creative work can be done only with a relaxed mind and body. If we
are passing through a stressful phase, it is just not humanly possible to generate
creative ideas.

Continuation in the next page

Could you think of 101 new things


to do with eggs and oil?

Hellmann’s is one of Unilever’s oldest brands having been popular for over 100 years.
If you too share a passion for discovery and innovation we will give you the tools and
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please visit www.unilever.com/rdjobs.

21
SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

2.7.4 STEPS TO STIMULATE CREATIVITY

You can stimulate your creativity by going through the following steps:

• Associating: looking at different ideas, analysing and grouping problems.


• Questioning: posing questions to yourself and others, and questioning the validity
and practicality of ideas and approaches.
• Observing: surveying the environment, and observing people, events, situations.
• Networking: You may need the cooperation and support of those who are willing
to help you in your creative ventures.
• Experimenting: The validity of any idea or approach cannot be ascertained unless
there is a process of experimentation. A lot of ideas emerge to be viable propositions
with trial and error process. This is the way to learn something new.

2.7.5 TYPES OF PEOPLE

Creativity and innovation are greatly dependent on the type of person one is. There are
basically three types of people:

• Those that make things happen.


• Those that let it happen.
• Those that don’t know what happened.

Which one are you? You can be creative only if you belong to the first category.

2.8 HUMAN VALUES


Values play a crucial role in our life. They are the driving force to develop the personality
of an individual.
Reference:Values determine what we should do and how we should do. The choice
betweenSoft
two Skills
things -(ideas,
Manmohan Joshi depends upon the relative value of things. This
beliefs, actions)
choice keeps changing according to one’s interest and contemporary circumstances.

According to Dorothy Lee (1959),

“We can speak about human values, but we cannot know it directly.
We infer value through its expression in behaviour.”

This phenomenon depends upon one’s expression out of which may emerge certain general
guides to behaviour. These guides tend to give direction to life and may be called values
which in turn play a pivotal role in shaping up our overall personality.

22
SOFT SKILLS PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT
Goal Setting
2.6.1 WHAT IS A GOAL?

We can say that:

• A goal is a roadmap to future. You need to decide what your ultimate goal is (in
personal and professional life). After you have decided on your goal, you need to
plan how you are going to achieve it. Failing to plan is actually the same as planning
to fail. While making a plan you need to think of all the aspects and resources –
physical, mental and financial – you would need. Abraham Lincoln once remarked:
“If I had 8 hours to chop down a tree, I’d need 6 sharpening my axe.”
• Goals need to be specific. You can’t achieve anything if you are vague and not
focused on a specific target to achieve.
• Think about the following:
-- Do you believe you can achieve?
-- You need to dream.
-- Keep the dream alive, reach your goal.
-- If you don’t decide what you want out of life, you have no goal.
• Remember:
-- Goals need to be realistic: “I want to lose 20 kg in 1 month!”
-- Is it realistic?
-- Prioritize your goals and decide the order of their importance.
-- Assess your resources: money, information, health, skills etc.

2.6.2 TYPES OF GOALS

There are two types of goals and you need to concentrate on both (though with different
perspectives and approaches):

• Short-term goals: Be clear about them and work towards achieving them.
• Long-term goals: While taking care of short-term goals, do not lose sight of your
long-term goals because they are the ones that you ultimately want to achieve.
Quite often some short-term goals pave the way for long-term goals too.

2.6.3 SMART GOALS

Pick each one of the following and analyse critically:

S = Specific
M = Measurable
A = Attainable
R = Relevant
T = Time-bound

Reference:
Soft Skills - Manmohan Joshi
19
Lateral Thinking
What is lateral thinking?
It essentially means being able to think creatively or "outside the box" in order to solve a problem.

Usually, logical thinking is used to solve problems in a direct, straightforward way (also known as
vertical thinking). Lateral thinking however, looks at things from a sideways perspective (also
known as horizontal thinking), in order to find answers that aren't immediately apparent.

The term was first coined by psychologist Edward de Bono. These skills are often required
in creative careers like marketing or advertising.
Examples of lateral thinking interview questions

 Name an ancient invention still in use in most parts of the world today that allows
people to see through walls. Answer: The window.
 An Australian woman was born in 1948 but only celebrated her 16th birthday quite
recently. Why? Answer: She was born on February the 29th.
How to improve your lateral thinking skills

Improving these skills can be challenging as lateral thinking comes more naturally to some people
than others.

However, like everything else, practice makes perfect, and setting yourself lateral thinking
examples can help.

Because this type of skill is "situational" and displays a thought process rather than something
physical (like IT skills for example), it can be tough to come up with ways of boosting your ability.

Here are some exercises you could try:

 Mind mapping
Mind maps can be a great way of solving a problem when logical thinking just doesn't help.
Because mind maps are visual aids, they require your brain to adjust its thought processes, which
can often help you find answers unexpectedly. Mind maps give you the opportunity to put all your
ideas down on paper and then take a step back to gather your thoughts.
 Using your senses

We all have five senses – sight, touch, hearing, smell and taste – yet we very rarely use all of them
to solve problems. Typically, you use our visual senses to work things out but making use of our
other senses can sometimes have useful results.

For example, when faced with a problem, why not speak your thoughts aloud and record them on
your mobile phone? When you listen back, you may find something that you would have missed
otherwise.
 Reverse thinking

Reverse thinking involves analysing what people normally do in a situation and then doing the
opposite. If you find yourself only getting so far into a problem and them becoming stuck, you
might want to start at the end and work backwards. For example, look at the problem and then
describe what you'd ideally like the solution to be. From there, you can begin working backwards
to find the starting point to your solution.

Reference:

What is Lateral Thinking? | Examples of Lateral Thinking Skills (successatschool.org)


Negotiation Skills
NEGOTIATION

Negotiation is one of the most common forms of conflict management. Every day we negotiate
with something. We negotiate with our colleagues over where to go for lunch, with our co-teacher
as to whether she/he can take our class when applied for leave. We also negotiate with ourselves
about how to keep certain commitments like a diet or stopping a specific bad habit. It has been
widely acknowledged that ‘win-win’ negotiation is the best kind of negotiation. There are four
steps to win-win negotiation that almost anyone can perform with ease. These steps include
plans, relationships, agreements, and maintenance.

Establishing Win-win plans is Simple


You need only to set your own goals before you. Therefore, you must be able to anticipate goals
of the other party in advance, determine areas of probable agreement between the goals of the
others, and your goals. Develop win-win solutions to reconcile areas of probable disagreement.

Developing a Win-win Relationship is Easy


You have to plan the activities in such way to allow a positive personal relationship to develop.
Cultivate a sense of mutual trust with others. Allow the relationship to fully develop before
discussing business in earnest.

Forming Win-win Agreements is Easy


In order to enter into an agreement with others, you have to confirm the other party’s goals. You
must verify areas of agreement between your goals jointly resolve any remaining differences.

Performing Win-win Maintenance is Simple


You need only to
• maintain commitment by:
a. providing meaningful feedback, based on performance.
b. holding up your end of the agreement
• maintain the relationship by:
a. keeping in contact
b. reaffirming trust

Reference:
Effective Communication and Soft Skills - Nitin Bhatnagar & Mamta Bhatnagar
Social skills
Being a social animal, humans have developed various methods and ways to communicate the
messages, thoughts and feelings with others. Social skills are the skills used to communicate and
interact with each other, both verbally and non-verbally, through gestures, body language and
our personal appearance.
Advantages of social skills
There are distinct advantages of having well developed social skills. They are
1.To establish more and better relationships
It‘s difficult to advance or achieve goals in life without strong interpersonal relationships. It‘s
important to focus on relationships as it will help us to get a job, get promoted and make new
friends. Well-honed social skills can increase our happiness and satisfaction and give us a better
outlook on life.
By developing your social skills, you will become more charismatic, a desirable trait to become
popular or noticed by people. People are more interested in charismatic people as charismatic
people are (or at least appear to be) more interested in them.
2. Better Communication
It‘s almost impossible to have great social skills without good communication skills and the
ability to convey one's thoughts and ideas may be the single most important skill that anyone can
develop in life. To develop one's communication skills the best way is to relate with people and
able to work in large groups naturally.
3. Greater Efficiency
With efficient social skills we can fit ourselves in any social situation or gathering.
It becomes easy to attend a meeting at work or a party in our personal life if we know at least
some of the people who will be there. Some people avoid social interactions because they do not
wish to spend time with individuals who do not have similar interests and viewpoints.
4. Advancing Career Prospects
Organizations need smart people who have the potential to pull the job regardless of
circumstances. Most organizations are looking for individuals with a particular, tactical, skill set:
the ability to work well in a team and to influence and motivate people to get things done. Most
worthwhile jobs have a 'people component' and higher positions in an organization often involve
a large amount of time spent interacting with employees, media and colleagues. It is rare that an
individual can remain isolated in their office and still excel in their job.
Getting along and understanding people will help to open many personal and careerrelated doors.
We should build the confidence to start a conversation at a work-related conference and this may
lead to a new job offer with a higher salary. A smile and 'hello' in a social situation may lead to a
friendship being formed.
5. Increased Overall Happiness
The ability to build healthy relationships with other people can greatly reduce stress and anxiety
in our life. Levels of anxiety differ among people, like, if we are socially anxious and desperately
want to make friends or are too fearful to do so or are unsure about how to reach out to others.
As a result of these anxious feelings, we may even be avoiding social situations. Indeed, if we
improve our social support, it directly links with a better mental health in general, since having
good friends can act as a “buffer” for feelings of anxiety and low mood.
Techniques to improve social skills
 Speak the same volume as the people around you.

 Start with small talk and find ways to keep it going.


 Maintain open body language. Avoid slouching or crossing your arms.

 Practice non-verbal communication at home in front of a mirror.


 Practice in public places where chatting with strangers is acceptable.
 Build up your confidence interacting with others

 Develop strong communication skills that would increase the chance for successful
relationships

 Note what went well and what didn't in past conversations.

References:
Soft Skills-3 (osou.ac.in)
Assertive Skills
Information from your Patient Aligned Care Team

Assertive Communication
What is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness is communicating and expressing your thoughts, feelings, and opinions in a
way that makes your views and needs clearly understood by others, without putting down
their thoughts, feelings, or opinions. Assertiveness is the ability to express our thoughts and
feelings openly in an Honest, Appropriate, Respectful and Direct way. It can be HARD to
do, but it gets easier with practice. In assertive communication both individuals are
considered to be equally important.

The Basic Assertive Rights of Every Human Being include:

 Having dignity and self-respect


 Saying NO when justified without feeling guilty
 Expressing your feelings
 Asking for what you want directly
 Feeling good about yourself
 Being able to change your mind
 Negotiating and reaching compromises when conflict exists
 Being able to make mistakes

Common Barriers to Assertiveness


Some people fear repercussions of acting assertively or may lack the skills to express
themselves effectively. They may believe that they don’t have the right to be assertive.
Communicating assertively will not guarantee the other person will change his or her
behavior and give you what you want, but it will help you establish limits and boundaries
with others.

Passive Communication or Behavior

Passive communication and behavior involves allowing your own rights to be violated by
failing to express honest feelings, thoughts, and beliefs, or by expressing your thoughts and
Assertive Communication (continued)

feelings in an apologetic manner that others can easily disregard. The messages you
communicate might be:
“I don’t count; you can take advantage of me.”
“My thoughts and feelings don’t matter; only yours do.”

Aggressive Communication and Behavior


Aggressive communication and behavior involves communicating in a demanding, abrasive,
or hostile way. It is insensitive to others’ rights, feelings and beliefs. The usual goals of
aggression are domination and winning, forcing the other person to lose.

Some people mistakenly think they are being “assertive” when in fact they are being
aggressive.

Passive – Aggressive
Passive-Aggressive communication involves expressing aggressive feelings in an indirect
way through passive resistance, rather than by openly confronting an issue. Examples
include: sulking; ignoring the other person; complaining behind the other person’s back;
procrastinating; deliberately being late or slow; intentional poor performance; acting in a
way that will frustrate others; and ‘acting innocent’ when you have done something to hurt
someone.

Assertiveness Is Simple but Hard

NonAssertive Assertive Aggressive


(Passive) (Tactful) (Rude)
 H onest  H onest  H onest
 A ppropriate  A ppropriate  A ppropriate
 R espectful  R espectful  R espectful
 D irect  D irect  D irect

Assertiveness involves respecting your rights and the rights of others.

Important Facts About Assertiveness


 Use “I” or “me” statements such as “When you do ______, I feel _____.”
 Voice tone, eye contact, and body posture are important parts of assertive
communication.
 Use a steady and calm voice, stand or sit up straight, look the other person in the eyes
without glaring.
 Feelings are usually only one word (e.g. angry, anxious, happy, sad, hurt, frustrated,
joyful)
Assertive Communication Ver3.0 – July 2013 Page 2
Assertive Communication (continued)

 Remember, assertiveness doesn’t guarantee that you will get what you want or that
the other person will understand your concerns or be happy with what you said. It
does improve the chances that the other person will understand what you want or how
you feel and thus improve your chances of communicating effectively.

Four Essential Steps to Assertive Communication


1. Tell the person what you think about their behavior without accusing them.
2. Tell them how you feel when they behave a certain way.
3. Tell them how their behavior affects you and your relationship with them.
4. Tell them what you would prefer them to do instead.

XYZ* Formula for Effective Communication


The goal of the XYZ* formula is to express the way you feel (internal world) in response to other’s
behavior (external world) in specific situations. You are the only person who has access to your feelings.
Others have no access to your internal world. The only way they will know what you are feeling is if you
tell them. Similarly, you only have access to other people’s external world. It is very easy to make a
mistake when trying to guess what others are feeling or intending.

I feel X when you do Y in situation Z and I would like *


I feel angry when you leave after work and I would like you to
your socks and put them in the hamper.
underwear on the
bedroom floor
I felt insignificant when you left me yesterday and I would like you to
with an empty gas leave the car with at
tank least 1/4 tank of gas.
I feel angry when you don’t call if you are staying and I would like you to
me late at work call as soon as you
know you will be late.
I feel loved when you kiss me when you get home and I would like you to
do that everyday.

Reference
Hunter, C. L., Goodie, J. L., Oordt, M. S., & Dobmeyer, A. C. (2009). Integrated Behavioral Health in Primary
Care: Step-by-step Guidance for Assessment and Intervention, American Psychological Association.

Assertive Communication Ver3.0 – July 2013 Page 3


Communication at Workplace

2. Organizational Communication

Organizational Communication can be broadly classified into formal and informal


communication.

Formal communications are those that are official, that are a part of the
recognized communication system which is involved in the operation of the
organization. These communications may be oral or written. A formal communication
can be from a superior to a subordinate, from a subordinate to a superior, intra-
administrative, or external. Formal communications take place externally to the
organization i.e. with outside groups, such as suppliers, clients, unions, government
agencies and community groups.

Formal communications may be mandatory, indicative or explanatory.


Mandatory communication implies an order or command to be followed and goes by
various euphemistic names such as instructions, briefing, etc., this kind of
communication is mostly vertical and usually one way from top to downward. The
indicative or explanatory communication may exist between any level and may be
vertical as well as horizontal.

Informal communications grow out of the social interactions among people who
work together. These are not bound by any chart on the wall but are bound by
conventions, customs and culture. Such communication provides useful information
for events to come, in the form of grapevine.

Organizational Communication can also be classified as

1. Downward Communication
2. Upward Communication
3. Lateral Communication
4. Interactive Communication

8
1. Downward Communication
Downward communication is one of the important processes of organizational
communication. It establishes linkages between people by facilitating flow of
information between them.

Downward communication has five purposes:

1. To give instruction to employees regarding their jobs and specific tasks.


2. To provide information about organizational procedures and practices to new
employees.
3. To explain the rationale of a job to a new employee
4. To provide subordinates feedback about their job performance
5. To give information required by different teams and departments for the
achievement of goals.

In the past, organizations gave attention only to the first two purposes; modern
organizations emphasize all five. If the communication process fails to achieve these
purposes, employees will not receive all the information they require about their jobs
and will not be aware about the importance of their work. They may consider their
job to be of little significance in the organization and may not show interest in them.
They may carry out their tasks only because they have been asked to do so by their
boss. This kind of attitude on the part of employees will have a negative impact on
organizational performance. It will promote an authoritative atmosphere, which will
adversely affect the upward and horizontal flow of information. It is, therefore,
important to communicate to all employees how their jobs will contribute to the
achievement of organizational goals and how their poor/excellent performance will
affect other jobs in the organization. Thus, the objective of downward
communication should be to help employees understand their jobs better and align
their goals with organizational goals.

9
Downward communication depends on different types of print and oral media to
disseminate information. Handbooks, manuals, magazines, newspapers, bulletin
boards, notices, posters, reports and memos are different kinds of written media
used by organizations. Direct orders or instructions from top executives, speeches,
meetings, public address systems, telephones, closed-circuit television are examples
of oral media used for downward communication.

2. Upward Communication

The upward communication process is non-directive in nature, unlike the downward


process, which is directive. Effective upward communication is possible only when
organizations empower their employees and allow them to participate freely in
decision-making. The techniques described below are used to promote upward
communication in organizations:

1. The grievance redressal procedure: Enables employees to appeal to


management and seek redressal of their grievances.

2. Open-door policy: Allows employees to approach managers at any time and


discuss their problems with them.

3. Counseling, attitude questionnaires and exit interviews: The Personnel


Department can conduct nondirective counseling programs to help employees
deal with their work-related problems as well as work and family conflicts.
Attitude questionnaires may be administered periodically to find out employees’
attitudes towards the workplace and the workload. Exit interviews may be held
for the employees quitting the organization to find out their reasons for leaving
and their suggestions for improving the workplace.

4. Participative techniques: upward communication can be achieved through


formal participation programs like union-management committees, suggestion
boxes, junior boards and quality circles or through informal involvement of
employees. Research has shown that employees who participate in these
programs are more satisfied with their job, show greater commitment toward the
job, and perform better than non-participating employees.

10
5. The ombudsperson: A position created to receive and respond to inquiries,
complaints, requests for policy clarification, or allegations of injustice by employees.
Through an ombudsperson, employees can have their problems resolved quickly
without going through lengthy channels. This position had initially been created in
Scandinavia as an outlet for people who felt that they had been treated unfairly by
the government bureaucracy.

3. Lateral Communication

Lateral communication involves communication across chains of command. It


facilitates coordination among departments. It probably takes place because people
prefer the informality of lateral communication to the formal downward and upward
communication. Those actively involved in lateral communication are called
“boundary spanners.” Since “boundary spanning,” allows for accumulation of vast
amounts of information, such persons wield tremendous power and enjoy greater
status by filtering and communicating with others.

4. Interactive Communication

Interactive communication is beneficial when communication is necessary between


peers involved in tasks that require coordinated effort. However, if they are not
involved in tasks that require coordinated effort, interactive communication would
result in reduced productivity. Interactive communication among peers may also
affect vertical communication in a negative way. Employees at each level may
communicate freely among themselves but fail to communicate upward and
downward.

The main aims of interactive communication are:

1. Task coordination
2. Problem solving
3. Information sharing, and
4. Conflict resolution

Reference:
Training Program on Effective Communication 11
National Institute of Agricultural Extension Management, Hyderabad

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