COMMON COLD

-by Ogden Nash

ABOUT THE POET:
Frederic Ogden Nash (August 19,
1902 – May 19, 1971) was an American
poet well known for his light verse, of
which he wrote over 500 pieces. With
his unconventional rhyming schemes,
he was declared by The New York
Times the country's best-known
producer of humorous poetry.

Nash was best known for

surprising, pun-like rhymes,
sometimes with words deliberately
misspelled for comic effect.
 COMMON COLD
The poem begins with the speaker being extremely angry with his doctor,
saying that the illness he’s suffering from cannot be as simple as a common
cold. As the speaker describes in the second stanza, this illness has given
him an aching forehead and a fever (amongst other symptoms). He states
this illness is actually quite serious, as opposed to the doctor who believes
this “common cold” is not serious at all. In the third stanza, the speaker
asks the doctor to pay proper attention to his illness, for his illness is as
powerful as a dictator. The speaker believes that the bacteria in his
system has been created by old scientists, that this bacteria is very
powerful. In the last stanza, the speaker points out that just like Lincoln’s
assassination and Shakespeare’s talent are not taken casually, his common
cold should not be taken be taken casually either.
 Go hang yourself, you old M.D.! In the first stanza, the speaker begins with a
You shall not sneer at me. very angry speech directed towards his doctor.
He asks the doctor to hang himself and to wash
Pick up your hat and his mouth with laundry soap, because he is
stethoscope, extremely unhappy with the doctor’s diagnosis.
Go wash your mouth with laundry He says that he did not call the doctor to be
given such a disappointing answer. He did not call
soap; the doctor to be told that he was simply
I contemplate a joy exquisite suffering from a common cold. This tells us that
the speaker was expecting the doctor to tell him
I'm not paying you for your visit. that he was suffering from a much more serious
I did not call you to be told illness.
My malady is a common cold.
 In this stanza, the speaker gives a vivid
By pounding brow and swollen lip; description of his painful symptoms. This
By fever's hot and scaly grip; tells us that the speaker is extremely
By those two red redundant eyes uncomfortable- his eyes are red and
That weep like woeful April watering, he has a fever and his nose is
skies; dripping. He’s having to use handkerchief
after handkerchief to curb these. The
By racking snuffle, snort, and use of multiple handkerchiefs tells us
sniff; that the speaker is truly very sick. His
By handkerchief after doctor is dismissing this cold as if it
handkerchief; were nothing, but the speaker thinks
This cold you wave away as this cold is a serious, powerful problem..
naught
Is the damnedest cold man ever
caught!
 In the third stanza, the speaker is asking his
doctor to pay proper attention to his cold, to
Give ear, you scientific fossil! examine it carefully. The speaker says that the
cold is not a weak thing that can be ignored. In his
Here is the genuine Cold Colossal; battle with the cold, the cold is actually a very
The Cold of which researchers powerful opponent, therefore the power of the
dream, cold should not be underestimated. The speaker
mentions certain examples to show how powerful
The Perfect Cold, the Cold Supreme. his cold is- he says the cold has the same amount
This honored system humbly holds of power and determination as someone who is
fighting for democracy. He refers to the cold as
The Super-cold to end all colds; “Fuhrer”, implying that the cold has the same evil
The Cold Crusading for Democracy; characteristics as the German dictator, Adolf
Hitler..
The Führer of the Streptococcracy.
 In the fourth stanza the speaker
Bacilli swarm within my portals provides a description of the bacteria
Such as were ne'er conceived by inside his body. He tells us this bacteria
must have been created by old scientists
mortals,
in a laboratory. The speaker believes
But bred by scientists wise and these bacteria are as large as mice, with
hoary feet of fire and heads of ice- which tells
In some Olympic laboratory; us that the speaker was in extreme pain
Bacteria as large as mice, because of this bacteria, he was having to
tolerate an extreme discomfort. The
With feet of fire and heads of
speaker further says that the bacteria
ice were not taking a break, the bacteria
Who never interrupt for slumber were torturing his body continuously.
Their stamping elephantine
rumba.
 A common cold, gadzooks,
forsooth! In this last stanza, the tone is one
Ah, yes. And Lincoln was jostled of mockery- the speaker is mocking
by Booth;
the doctor’s diagnosis. He refers to
Don Juan was a budding gallant,
Lincoln’s assassination,
Shakespeare’s talent and the Artic
And Shakespeare's plays show
cold- all of these are things that
signs of talent;
must be taken seriously. If one
The Arctic winter is fairly
were to take these things casually,
coolish,
they would be considered to be
And your diagnosis is fairly
foolish. The speaker says the
foolish.
doctor was quite foolish for not
Oh what a derision history holds
taking his cold seriously.
For the man who belittled the
Cold of Colds!
 POETIC DEVICES
Alliteration: The occurrence of the same letter or Metaphor: Metaphor is a common figure of speech
sound at the beginning of adjacent or closely that makes a comparison by directly relating one
connected words. thing to another unrelated thing.
Eg: The repetition of the "h" sound in "hang" and Eg: “Cold Colossal”, “Cold Supreme”- here the cold is
being compared with a person of great importance, almost
"hat," as well as the "s" sound in "sneer" and "soap"
as if the cold was being compared with a king. The speaker
The repetition of the "s" sound in "swollen," "scaly," is referring to the cold as if he’s referring to a king.
and "snuffle," as well as the "r" sound in "red," “The Fuhrer of the Streotococcracy”- The cold is being
"redundant," and "racking," compared with Adolf Hitler, a dictator who was referred
to as the Fuhrer of Germany.

Satire: The use of humour, exaggeration and ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity.
The entire first stanza satirizes the traditional doctor-patient relationship through humour and
exaggerated insults, such as asking the doctor to “Wash your mouth with laundry soap”, in response to the
doctor thinking the cold was trivial.
Imagery: Language that helps to stimulate the reader’s senses. In this poem the language helps
the readers to visualize the events and descriptions in the poem.
Eg: “Go wash your mouth with laundry soap”
-this provides an image of laundry soap being used, it describes the act of washing the mouth with laundry soap
“Pounding brow and swollen lip”
-This helps the reader to visualize a person with a headache and a swollen lip .
“ Bacili swarm within my portals”
-This provides an image of the Bacili swarming like bees.

“But bread by scientists wise and hoary

In some Olympic laboratory”
-This creates an image of old scientists with white hair, working inside a laboratory.

“Bacteria as large as mice,

With feet of fire and heads of ice”
-This helps the reader form an idea of what the bacteria could look like, by picturing mice, fire and ice.

“Their stamping elephantine rumba”

-This creates a picture of people stamping and dancing in the reader’s mind. The reader might also visualize an elephant. This vision tells the
reader about the size of an elephant. This size/proportion can be used to explain the intensity of the stamping.
Personification: Personification is the attribution of human characteristics to something non
human or abstract ideas for literary and artistic effect.
Eg: ‘By fever’s hot and scaly grip;’
-Fever is being given a “grip”, an ability to to hold things that usually humans have.

‘Cold Crusading for Democracy’

-A cold going on a crusade, where going on a crusade is a human activity.

‘On what a derision history holds’

-History is seen to have an opinion. Where it is usually only human beings who have
opinions.
Simile: The comparison of one thing with another thing of a different kind, used to make a
description more vivid.
The comparison of the weeping eyes to April skies is a simile
The comparison of the bacteria with mice(as large as mice) is a simile.

Hyperbole: Exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally.

Eg: "damnedest cold man ever caught,"
-By saying this, the speaker is exaggerating the intensity of the cold he has caught.
“Oh what a derision history holds
For the man who belittled the Cold of Colds”
-The speaker is saying that history will hold a bad opinion of the doctor because of one single
diagnosis, which is an exaggerated claim.
Irony: Saying the meaning of something by using language that states the opposite, typically for
humorous or emphatic effect

EG: “And Lincoln was jostled by Booth”

-Lincoln was actually shot by Booth. This is a serious event as opposed to jostling(pushing)someone,
which is a casual event. When the speaker says what happened to Lincoln was casual, the proper response
is to say that this event was not simple, it was serious, it was murder. The reason the speaker says this
was casual, is so that the reader remembers how serious the actual event was. Therefore, the speaker
uses “jostling”, a casual event, to remind the reader of how serious the actual event was.

“Don Juan was a budding gallant”

-By budding we mean inexperienced. However, Don Juan was very charming. So the speaker
emphasizes how extremely charming Don Juan was by using irony and saying the opposite word “budding”

“Shakespeare’s plays shows signs of talent;”

-This line suggests that Shakespeare was mildly talented. Once again, the speaker is using irony to
emphasize how extremely talented Shakespeare actually was.
 MESSAGE
The speaker of this poem suffers from a cold, but to him, it feels much, much worse.
He thinks his doctor is crazy for thinking it is simply a cold as he rattles off his
symptoms, and he’s irritated to have to pay his doctor for this simple diagnosis. For the
speaker, this cold is as powerful as a ruler, the cold has the same amount of power and
impact that a ruler has. For the speaker, this cold is as dangerous as Adolf Hitler (a
German Dictator).
We continuously get the sense of how serious this cold is for the speaker, because the
speaker continues to describe the cold in great detail. He says that the bacteria inside
his body are like mice, who with their feet of fire and heads of ice are bothering the
poet. The poem continuously reminds us of how the speaker is feeling very
uncomfortable, that the speaker is suffering.
The speaker believes that his illness is serious. However, since the doctor believed his
illness was casual, the speaker feels like the doctor was foolish. The speaker believes
that the doctor will get a bad reputation for thinking that such a serious cold was a
simple thing.
The poet of this poem, Ogden Nash (1902-1971), was considered a hypochondriac
himself.
Let’s answer these questions:

1) How has the speaker referred to Adolf Hitler in this poem?

2) Mention two instances of the speaker insulting the doctor in this
poem.

3) ‘I’m not paying for your visit.’ 4) ‘Who never interrupt for slumber’
a) Who is the speaker referring to in a) Who is being referred to here?
this line? b) What further description does the
b) Why was this person asked to visit? speaker provide for this thing?
c) From this line, what do you think c) Where does the speaker think this
the speaker feels about this thing was created?
person?
5) Do you think the doctor did the right thing by belittling the
speaker’s cold? Provide reasons to justify your answer.
THANK YOU