BEHOLD... MY ACTUAL D&D CHARACTER (wood elf paladin), CURRENTLY BEING USED IN A CAMPAIGN

Epimelides of House Carrick the Keebler Elf Kind of Annoying Religious Person
( he / him / his )

wields a custard
is super gay and always high
loves weed and coffee
hates needing help; fears spiders
wants to bestow a great gift upon someone foretold of by a seer

god so much of this is perfect. ofc epimelides wields a custard he's a nobleman who has a heart of gold (and pockets of gold too plus i'm also english so. checks out lol); he is indeed Very Gay (he CanonicallyTM likes a stableboy); not very into drugs but is the party's resident himbo so i'll let it slide; HE DOES HATE IMPOSING ON THE PARTY BY ASKING FOR ASSISTANCE; I PERSONALLY HATE SPIDERS SO HE DOES TOO; and idk abt that last bit but it sounds Lore-Rich and Well-Thought Out so i'll take it 👍