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    Epic Meal Time
    Epic Meal Time
    Epic Meal Time
    Ebook215 pages43 minutes

    Epic Meal Time

    By Harley Morenstein and Josh Elkin

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Jackass meets Man vs. Food in this awe-inspiring and hilarious guide to extreme, artery-hostile cooking—based on the wildly popular YouTube cooking show (5.5 million subscribers).

    Do you find yourself craving pizza topped with deep-fried chicken nuggets and fries? Does a six-patty burger buried under a mound of bacon have your mouth watering? How about a 5,800-calorie corn dog?

    Harley Morenstein (a.k.a. The Sauce Boss), created EpicMealTime for the ex­treme chef in all of us. His kitchen crew (none of whom, amazingly enough, have had any culinary education or previous cooking experience), brings his artery-clogging visions to life—and now you can, too, using ingredients as diverse as waffles, chicken hearts, cake mix, tortilla chips, maple syrup, fast food menu items, bacon grease, Irish crème whiskey, cheese sticks, breakfast sausage, pounds and pounds of bacon . . . and much more!
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherGallery Books
    Release dateMar 25, 2014
    ISBN9781476746029
    Epic Meal Time
    Author

    Harley Morenstein

    Harley Morenstein is a former substitute high school teacher from Montreal. He co-created Epic Meal Time with his friends, in his backyard.

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      Book preview

      Epic Meal Time - Harley Morenstein

      SAUCE BOSS

      HARLEY MORENSTEIN

      FIRST EPISODE: Fast Food Pizza

      EATING STYLE: Calculated

      POSITION: Grand Admiral Master Chief/Commander General

      The fuckin’ brains of EpicMealTime, the hairy face of EpicMealTime, and of course, the booming voice of EpicMealTime; Harley Morenstein, a.k.a. Sauce Boss! Harley was a schoolteacher until the summer of 2010, when he created EpicMealTime in his backyard. Harley went from schooling noobs to snuggling boobs in just a few months. With no editing skills and no camera training, he bought a fuckin’ laptop (balling) and a camera (boss balling) on a teacher’s salary (not balling) and taught himself how to produce a show. Big-time moves right there. Although EpicMealTime started out as a hobby, Harley became seriously commited to producing a legit series. The first 60+ videos of EpicMealTime were single-handedly edited by the Sauce Boss himself. What you know about video-editing software? Although he touches the food on the rarest of occasions, he takes no part in the cooking. Fuck that, he’s got a good goon squad to handle that shit. All of the meals come from his mind and are passed down to the rest of the team, who further mutate them. Finally, each meal is filtered back through the Brain of the Sauce Boss to ensure maximum Next-Level Intelligence of the Epic Meal.

      WHAT YOU DON’T KNOW

      Egg beating! More than 15 dozen (that’s 180 for you dumbasses) chicks have been fingered on EpicMealTime.

      WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT COOKING?

      WORST PIZZA

      INGREDIENTS

      1 large cheese pizza

      1 Crunch Wrap Supreme (Taco Bell)

      1 large French fries (Wendy’s)

      1 large order popcorn chicken (KFC)

      6 McNuggets

      1 Big Mac

      1 Baconator (Wendy’s)

      1 Teen Burger (A&W)

      2 orders onion rings (A&W)

      2 16-ounce bags grated mozzarella cheese

      SERVES: 2 men or 4 little bitches

      TOTAL CALORIES

      EQUIPMENT

      1 large cookie sheet or piece of tinfoil made into baking sheet apparatus

      1 pizza cutter

      DIRECTIONS

      1. Preheat the oven to 350°F.

      2. Lay cheese pizza on baking sheet or tinfoil baking apparatus.

      3. Start by decorating pizza with Crunch Wrap Supreme in the middle of the pie, using it as a guide to decorate the rest.

      4. Recklessly sprinkle half the French fries and all the popcorn chicken and nuggets around the perimeter of the Crunch Wrap Supreme.

      5. Place the Big Mac, Baconator, and Teen Burger around the pizza in a triangle, using the Crunch Wrap as a midpoint.

      6. Finally, sprinkle the remaining French fries and the A&W onion rings around the entire pie.

      7. Pour as much mozzarella cheese onto the pizza as you can.

      8. Put into oven for 12 minutes or until the cheese is bubbling.

      9. Take pizza out of the oven and let sit to cool down. Once the pizza isn’t super hot, cut with pizza cutter and let the clogging of the arteries begin.

      ANGRY FRENCH CANADIAN

      INGREDIENTS

      1 pound bacon

      6 eggs

      1 20-inch French baguette

      1 16-ounce can maple syrup

      1¹/2 large orders poutine (French fries drenched with gravy and topped with cheese curds or mozzarella cheese)

      3 steamed hot dogs with buns

      SERVES: 1 Muscles Glasses or 3 humans or 5 little hater bitches

      TOTAL CALORIES

      IF YOU DON’T KNOW, NOW YOU KNOW

      No cast member of EpicMealTime has any culinary education or previous professional cooking experience.

      EQUIPMENT

      1 large bowl for egg wash

      1 frying pan

      DIRECTIONS

      1. Fry up all the bacon and let sit on the side.

      2. Crack eggs into large bowl and beat for dunking.

      3. Slice the baguette in half.

      4. Cut the baguette halves into thirds in order to fit in the pan, then dunk the inside cut slice of bread into the egg wash.

      5. Fry the pieces of baguette until golden on egg side.

      6. Place the bread on a large plate and pour maple syrup over all 6 pieces.

      7. Lay the bacon on 3 pieces of bread.

      8. Put the poutine over

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