Improving Self-Esteem Module 4 of 9
Improving Self-Esteem Module 4 of 9
Improving Self-Esteem Module 4 of 9
Improving Self-Esteem
Module 4
Biased Expectations
Introduction What are Biased Expectations? Challenging Biased Expectations Thought Diary for Biased Expectations (example) Worksheet: Thought Diary for Biased Expectations Experimenting with Biased Expectations Worksheet: Experiment Record for Biased Expectations Module Summary About This Module 2 2 4 6 7 8 11 7 8
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Introduction
In Module 3, we talked about how dormant low self-esteem becomes active and maintains itself until it becomes acute. When you encounter an at-risk situation, your negative core belief about yourself is activated and leads to two types of negative thoughts biased expectations and negative self-evaluations. In this module, we will examine biased expectations in more detail, and discuss ways of changing and overcoming them. By addressing your biased expectations in daily situations, you can prevent the negative beliefs you hold about yourself from being confirmed and re-activated. Ultimately, this will help you to chip away at your low self-esteem.
When you jump to such negative conclusions about the future, you will tend behave in particular ways often engaging in unhelpful behaviours. You will tend to: Avoid the situation totally, Try the situation out but escape when things seem too difficult or the anxiety seems overwhelming, Be overly cautious and engage in safety behaviours. These are behaviours that you use to help you get through the situation. For example, you might take someone with you, over-prepare so that you can better face the situation, take medication to help you through, or place certain conditions on entering the situation (eg., turn up late/leave early).
At the end of the day, the unhelpful thoughts and behaviours contribute to you feeling incredibly anxious, nervous, uncertain, and unconfident about things and this is confirmation that your negative core beliefs are true. Heres an example of biased expectations in action. You can follow this example that is illustrated in the form of the model on the next page. Lets say that you have the negative core belief, I am stupid. At present, your low self-esteem is dormant as you have developed the rule and assumption, I must never let others see my true abilities, because if they do, they will know that I am stupid and not want to have anything to do with me. As long as you are able to live up to your rule, you might feel okay about yourself. However, the situation is about to change. A few of your friends invite you to join their team for a quiz night. You are now in an at-risk situation because you will have to show others your abilities at the quiz night. This means that your rule is likely to be broken. At this point, you might have thought, Ill be no good, Ill let everyone down, or Everyone will know how dumb I am, and are probably feeling anxious. Its also at this point that you could choose how to approach this situation. You could avoid the situation totally by declining your friends invitation or you decide that you will accept the invitation. If you accept the invitation, you might then think about how you could make sure that people do not come to the conclusion that you are stupid. As such, you might prepare very hard for the quiz night by reading all of the weeks newspapers, watching current affairs
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programmes and documentaries on TV, and reading trivia books. You might also think about how you could leave the quiz night half way through if things are not turning out well. As discussed above, all these are unhelpful behaviours, and they maintain your negative emotions and confirm your negative core belief.
Negative Life Experiences Negative Core Belief I am stupid Unhelpful Rules & Assumptions I must never let others see my true abilities, because if they do, they will know that I am stupid and not want to have anything to do with me.
Unhelpful Behaviour Make sure that I check my work many times before showing it to anyone, make excuses to avoid presentations or if I have to, write out a script and say only what is on the script
At-Risk Situation Friends invite me to join their team for a quiz night
Biased Expectations Ill be no good Ill make them lose Ill make a complete fool of myself Everyone will see how dumb I am The others will wish I wasnt on their team
Unhelpful Behaviour/s Avoid: Say no to invitation Over-prepare (safety): watch all the news items during the week, read the weeks newspapers, read trivia books Conditions (safety): only answer questions if I am 100% sure, so I dont get anything wrong. Escape plan: say Im not feeling well and leave if things are not going well.
Unhelpful Emotions Anxiety, nervousness Confirmation of Negative Core Belief I was right I am stupid
(Acute Low Self-Esteem) Continuing with the above example, your belief I am stupid gets confirmed in a number of ways. Firstly, it is confirmed by all the negative predictions you are making all that negative self-talk. Secondly, because you feel so anxious, you might use this as a sign that you are all the negative things you believe about yourself If I feel so anxious about this, I must be stupid. Thirdly, all your unhelpful behaviours mean that you are acting in a manner consistent with the idea that you are stupid. So, if you act as if you are stupid, you will continue to think and believe that you are stupid. Finally, if things dont go the way you would like them to (eg, you get some of the questions wrong), you leave early. Because you do so, you dont give yourself a chance to answer a question correctly, or realise that getting a question wrong isnt such a bad thing, or just have fun regardless of the outcome. Alternatively, if things go okay and you
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answer a few questions correctly, you might ignore your efforts as no big deal. If things go really well and you answer heaps of questions, you might attribute it to all your preparation or say, The questions were really easy, but not acknowledge your own abilities. What we have seen is an unhelpful way of responding to a daily situation, which helps keep your low selfesteem alive and well. So how could you respond differently, in a way inconsistent with low self-esteem? How could you have realistic expectations and engage in helpful behaviour?
Then: What am I expecting? What am I predicting? What do I see happening in this situation? What conclusions am I making?
After you have written these down, youll then need to ask yourself: How strongly do I believe this will happen? Rate the strength of your belief between 0 and100% What emotion(s) am I feeling? How intense are these emotions? Rate the intensity of your emotion(s) between 0 and 100%
Once you have completed the first section, you are ready to begin to Challenge Your Biased Expectations. Here are the questions asked in your Thought Diary to challenge these types of negative thoughts: What is the evidence for my expectations? What is the evidence against my expectations? How likely is it that what I am expecting will actually happen (Rate 0-100%)?
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What is the worst that could happen? What is the best that could happen? What is the most likely thing that will happen? How does it affect me when I expect the worst? If the worst did happen, what could I do to cope? How else could I view the situation? Are there any positives in me or the situation that I am ignoring?
The ultimate aim of doing this Thought Diary is for you to Develop more Realistic Expectations. Once you have explored the answers to the above challenging questions in your Thought Diary, ask yourself: What would be a more realistic expectation?
The final step is then to: Re-rate how much I now believe the original biased expectation I was making, Re-rate the intensity of the emotions that I was originally feeling.
If you work through the entire Thought Diary for challenging your biased expectations, it is likely that you will experience a decrease in your belief in the negative predictions you were making and a decrease in the intensity of your emotions. Using a Thought Diary to develop realistic expectations will help quieten, rather than activate or confirm, your negative beliefs about yourself. This will help you approach situations with an open mind, try new things, and often be pleasantly surprised by what you find, instead of letting your negative opinion of yourself constantly interfere with how you live your life. Try using a Thought Diary for Biased Expectations the next time you notice when you start feeling anxious, nervous and uncertain, or doubt yourself and your abilities. Stop yourself when you notice these sorts of feelings, and see if you can find any biased expectations that are contributing to the feeling. See if you notice any predictions you are making, negative conclusions you are jumping to, or bad outcomes you are envisaging. If you notice these biased expectations rearing their ugly head, use a Thought Diary to tackle them. Continue to use a Thought Diary to deal with these sorts of thoughts and feelings, until it becomes second nature. Then, you will find that you can easily catch the biased expectations in your head and challenge them in your head. This will take some time and a lot of practice, so for now, stick to writing it all down in your Thought Diary.
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What am I expecting? What am I predicting? What do I see happening in this situation? What conclusions am I jumping to?
Ill be no good; Ill make them lose; Ill make a complete fool of myself; Everyone will see how dumb I am; The others will wish I wasnt on their team.
How likely is it that what I am expecting will actually happen (0-100%)? 30% What is the worst that could happen?
I wont answer a single question correctly, we will lose, and my team mates wont talk to me for the rest of the night
30%
20%
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How much do I believe it will happen (0-100%)? What emotion(s) am I feeling? (Rate the intensity 0-100%)
What am I expecting? What am I predicting? What do I see happening in this situation? What conclusions am I jumping to?
How likely is it that what I am expecting will actually happen (0-100%)? What is the worst that could happen? What is the best that could happen?
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Experimenting with Biased Expectations
By challenging your biased expectations as you did in the last section (using a Thought Diary), you can now be in a better position to approach situations with an open mind and with more realistic and balanced expectations. The next step of challenging biased expectations is to test them out to see how accurate they really are. This is like a scientist doing an experiment with your biased expectations, to test how true they are. As with a Thought Diary, there are some steps you have to work through to properly experiment with your biased expectations. Below is an example of how to do this, and on page 11, there is a worksheet to help you complete the process for yourself. Step 1: Identify Your Biased Expectations From the first section of your Thought Diary, you will already know what the at-risk situation is and what it is that you have predicted in this situation, and how much you believe it will happen. Also, write down specifically how you will know if your biased expectations have come true. Ask yourself: What exactly would happen? What would an outsider see happening? What would you be doing? What would others be doing?
The Situation: Friends invite me to be on their quiz team My Biased Expectations: Ill be no good; Ill make them lose; Ill make a complete fool of myself; Everyone will see how dumb I am; The others will wish I wasnt on their team. How much do I believe it will happen (0-100%): 80% How will I know it has happened: I wont know a single question. Everyone except me will know
the answers. The others will make rude comments or glare at me.
Step 2: Identify Your Unhelpful Behaviours Next you need to identify what unhelpful behaviours you might be engaging in to cope with your negative predictions and anxiety (e.g., avoidance, escape, safety behaviours).
Over-preparing for the quiz (e.g., news, newspapers, trivia books), placing conditions on going (eg., planning to only answer if I am 100% sure), having an escape plan.
Step 3: Remember Your Realistic Expectations Next remind yourself of the new perspective that you developed from your Thought Diary, as you will also want to test your new realistic expectations against your old biased expectations.
I dont have to be really good, its just a quiz night. They are my friends, they are just there to have fun and dont really care about winning or who answers what. Its likely that I will be able to answer some questions that are in my area of interest. How I do at a quiz night isnt a reflection of who I am as a person everyone has their strengths and weaknesses.
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Step 4: Identify Your Helpful Behaviours This involves noting what it is you will do differently to test out your new and old expectations, to see which is more accurate. This is really setting up the experiment and specifying what it is you will actually do. This will generally involve confronting rather than avoiding the situation, staying in the situation rather than escaping, and stopping safety behaviours to see how you go by yourself and without imposing conditions and restrictions on you entering the situation.
Ask my friends if they are doing anything to prepare for the quiz night. If they do any preparation, do only as much as they are doing. If they are not preparing at all, go to the quiz night, without preparing beforehand. Stay at the quiz night until the end, regardless of how I am going with answering the questions. Answer questions even if I am not totally certain. Purposely suggest an answer that I know is wrong.
Step 5: Carry Out the Experiment Follow through with what you set out to do in Step 4. Carry out the experiment, engaging in the more helpful behaviours you have identified, and see what happens. Step 6: Evaluate the Results The last step is to reflect on what actually happened and how this compares to what you were expecting in Step 1. What were the results of the experiment? What did you observe? How does this compare to your biased expectations? Which expectations did the results support (biased or realistic)? What was it like to carry the experiment out and act differently? What did you learn from the experience?
What actually happened? I answered some questions that were in my areas of interest. I got
some questions wrong, but so did others no one saw it as a big deal. I had a good time. No one seemed to take it too seriously. They seemed to be pleased to have me on their team.
How much did my biased expectations come true (0-100%)? 10% Which expectations were supported by the experiment? My more realistic expectations. What was it like to act differently? It was hard at first. But not overpreparing, purposely
suggesting a wrong answer, and not planning how to escape showed me that I can do this, and that not knowing everything is not so bad.
What did I learn? This shows me that what I predict will happen in situations may be guided
by my opinion of myself, and may not always be true. So I may need to make my expectations more realistic, act accordingly, and see what happens.
If the results of your experiment do not support your biased expectations, which is often the case, that is great! It will be important to remember that the next time you find yourself making biased expectations. It will also be important to reflect and ask yourself What does this mean for you as a person? However, should your biased expectations be supported, which may happen at times, it will be important to ask yourself some questions about this. Ask yourself: Were there are any other reasons for the result, aside from who you are as a person? What else was happening at that time? Are there other ways of viewing what happened? What could you learn from the experience to improve or change things in the future?
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It is important to note that not everything we think is inaccurate, or has no grain of truth to it. However, often when we have problems with low self-esteem, we predict negative things about ourselves and our abilities all the time, and act accordingly. We never step back to question these predictions or test them out. This is a habit that is important to break. It is the automatic process of predicting the worst, because of our negative view of ourselves that we want to change. It is important to tackle this because if you can make more realistic predictions in your day-to-day life, you will think and act differently, in a manner inconsistent with someone with low self-esteem. Behaving in a manner that is inconsistent with your low opinion of yourself, is the path to overcoming this negative opinion. When you do this, you will start to gather new information about yourself, which will allow you to see yourself in a less harsh, more positive, and kinder light. Now, its time for you to do an experiment. Use the worksheet on the next page to help you plan an experiment to test out your biased expectations.
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How much do I believe it will happen (0-100%)? How will I know it has happened?
Step 5: Carry Out the Experiment (from Step 4) Step 6: Evaluate the Results
What actually happened?
How much did my biased expectations come true (0-100%)? Which expectations were supported by the experiment? What was it like to behave differently?
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Module Summary
Biased expectations occur when it looks likely that your unhelpful rule or assumption will be broken Biased expectations involve: overestimating the likelihood that something bad will happen and how bad the consequences will be, as well as underestimating your ability to cope Biased expectations will lead to certain types of unhelpful behaviours (eg., avoidance, escape and safety behaviours) and unhelpful emotions (eg., anxiety, nervousness, fear, doubt, uncertainty) One way to overcome biased expectations is to challenge or dispute them using a Thought Diary. This involves identifying what you are expecting, challenging your expectations, and developing more realistic expectations Another way to overcome biased expectations is to experiment with them. This involves planning experiments to test the accuracy of your expectations, and is based on identifying your unhelpful behaviours and engaging in more helpful behaviour. It will often involve behaving in a manner inconsistent with what you are expecting (eg., approaching challenges, and stopping avoidance, escape, and safety behaviours).
Coming up next
In the next module, you will learn to identify and challenge negative selfevaluations, and develop more balanced evaluations of yourself.
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About This Module
CONTRIBUTORS
Dr. Louella Lim (DPsych1) Centre for Clinical Interventions Dr. Lisa Saulsman (MPsych2, PhD3) Centre for Clinical Interventions
1Doctor
Paula Nathan (MPsych2) Director, Centre for Clinical Interventions Adjunct Senior Lecturer, School of Psychiatry and Clinical Neuroscience, The University of Western Australia
of Psychology (Clinical Psychology)
3Doctor
of Psychology (Clinical)
2Master
BACKGROUND
The concepts and strategies in the modules have been developed from evidence based psychological practice, primarily Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy (CBT). CBT is a type of psychotherapy that is based on the theory that unhelpful negative emotions and behaviours are strongly influenced by problematic cognitions (thoughts). This can be found in the following: Beck, A.T., Rush, A. J., Shaw, B.F., & Emery, G. (1979). Cognitive Therapy of Depression. New York: Guildford. Clark, D. M. (1986). A cognitive approach to panic. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 24, 461-470. Clark, D. M. & Wells, A. (1995). A cognitive model of social phobia. In R. Heimberg, M. Liebowitz, D.A. Hope and F.R. Schneier (Eds), Social Phobia: Diagnosis, Assessment and Treatment. New York: Guidlford.
REFERENCES
These are some of the professional references used to create the modules in this information package. Fennell, M. (1998). Low Self-Esteem. In N. Tarrier, A. Wells and G. Haddock (Eds), Treating Complex Cases: The Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Approach. London: John Wiley & Sons. Fennell, M. (2001). Overcoming Low Self-Esteem. New York: New York University Press. Fennell , M. & Jenkins, H. (2004). Low Self-Esteem. In J. Bennett-Levy, G. Butler, M. Fennell et al (Eds), Oxford Guide to Behavioural Experiments in Cognitive Therapy. Oxford: Oxford Medical Publications.
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES
Burns, D. (1993). Ten Days to Self-Esteem. New York: Quill William Morrow. Dryden, W. (2003). Managing Low Self-Esteem. London: Whurr Publishers. Field, L. (1995). The Self-Esteem Workbook. An Interactive Approach to Changing Your Life. Brisbane: Element Books Limited. McKay, M. & Fanning, P. (1987). Self-Esteem. Oakland: New Harbinger Publications.
IMPROVING SELF-ESTEEM
This module forms part of: Lim, L., Saulsman, L., & Nathan, P. (2005). Improving Self-Esteem. Perth, Western Australia: Centre for Clinical Interventions. ISBN: 0-9757995-0-9 Created: July 2005
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