Codependency Worksheets: 

 
Symptoms & Behaviors  
 
Codependency can easily develop in relationships with people struggling with 
addiction. In order to understand how harmful this can be, it’s best to compare 
the behaviors and symptoms of codependency with those of addiction.  
 
Symptoms: Physical or emotional symptoms of codependency and addiction 
include: 
 
○ Preoccupation: A person obsessively focuses their thinking on their 
substance; AND a codependent obsessively focuses on the person.  
■ Addiction: I can’t wait to drink tonight. I wonder if I have 
enough alcohol at home or if I should stop and get some 
more.  
■ Codependent: I wonder where he is or what he’s doing or who 
he’s texting 
○ Increased tolerance: More drugs or alcohol are required to produce 
the same effect, AND more toxic behavior is required to produce a 
negative reaction from codependents compared to before.  
■ Addiction: I have to drink twice as much as I used to get drunk 
■ Codependent: I used to get upset when he yelled at me, but it 
doesn’t bother me anymore.  
○ Loss of Control: A person tries and fails to control how much they 
drink or do drugs, AND a codependent tries and fails to control their 
behavior towards the person. 
■ Addiction: I only intended to have 1 drink, but I drank so much I 
blacked out.  
■ Codependent: I said I'd kick him out if he came home drunk, 
but I ended up apologizing instead.  
○ Denial: A person denies their problem by rationalizing their actions. 
■ Addiction: Everybody drinks, I don’t have a problem. Without 
alcohol, I can’t be social. 
■ Codependent: I am helping him, he needs me. Without me, he 
would lose his job. Things will get better.  
 
 ○ Blackouts: (Is not an exact parallel) A person experiences amnesia 
from being unconscious as a result of substance abuse or drinking 
too much. AND a codependent cannot recall all the details of 
high-stress emotional encounters 
■ Addiction: I don’t remember what happened last night 
■ Codependent: I don’t remember you saying that or how the 
fight started. It seems blurry 
○ Craving: A person feels a deep physical and mental need to use 
substances; AND a codependent feels a deep mental longing for the 
person.   
■ Addiction: My body aches if I go too long without a drink. All I 
can think about is going home and getting drunk.  
■ Codependent: He’s all I think about. When he’s not around I 
ache for him.  
○ Compulsive Behavior: A person uses substances compulsively 
despite the consequences it creates in their lives; AND a 
codependent feels compelled to act irrationally despite 
consequences it might create for themselves. 
■ Addiction:  
■ Codependent: I went through his phone, I ate to make myself 
feel better, I left work early to go get him something.  
○ Decreased Tolerance: A person can no longer handle as much of a 
substance as they used to without experiencing negative effects 
more quickly. AND, a codependent loses their ability to be patient as 
they used to and experiences negative emotions more quickly. 
■ Addiction: I blackout much quicker than I used to. 
■ Codependent: Everything he does irritates me.  
○ Medical Problems: As a result of substance abuse, people 
experience physical issues. As a result of stress, codependents 
experience physical and mental issues 
■ Addiction: Diseases of the throat, lungs, heart, brain, liver, or 
digestive tract. Sexually transmitted diseases or other 
problems as a result of injury during intoxication.  
■ Codependent: Stress-related problems of the body and mind. 
Headaches, hives, ulcers, neck or wrist pain, back problems, 
anxiety, depression, digestive issues, or stomach issues.  
 
 
 
● Behaviors: Actions common for addiction and codependency are 
○ Rationalizing: A person finds a way to justify their substance use 
and make their behavior “okay”. AND a codependent finds ways to 
justify how they are treated 
■ Addiction: I only blackout on the weekends. This doesn’t affect 
my work or family 
■ Codependent: There are other people in way worse situations 
than I am. 
○ Minimizing: A person downplays the consequences of their actions; 
AND a codependent downplays the negative influence of this person   
■ Addiction: Drinking has barely affected my job. Things are fine.  
■ Codependent: I’ve lost a lot of my friends but now I have time 
for the people who matter. Things are fine. 
○ Blaming: A person blames outside forces for their substance abuse. 
AND a codependent blames outside forces for their partner’s 
behavior 
■ Addiction: I wouldn’t need to get drunk every night if my boss 
was nicer to me. I wouldn’t need to get high every night if I 
wasn’t trying to mourn. 
■ Codependent: His boss was out to get him, that’s why he got 
fired. His coworkers have been out to get him since day 1, 
that’s why he had a bad day.  
○ Sneaking/Lying: A person lies about the true nature of their 
addiction so that they can continue using drugs. AND a codependent 
lies to others to enable the person’s behavior and/or their own. 
■ Addiction: I lied about spending the night at a friend’s house 
(or working late) so that I could go drinking without anyone 
knowing.  
■ Codependent: He was too drunk to go to work so I called his 
boss and lied for him. I lie to my friends about how much time 
we spend together.  
○ Hiding and secrets: A person hides their substance use to avoid 
shame or intervention. AND a codependent keeps things about the 
person secret to avoid shame.  
■ Addiction: My mom thinks I am doing so well. I hope she 
doesn’t find my drugs. 
■ Codependent: He was doing so well last week. I hope nobody 
finds out he blacked out last night.  
 ○ Isolating: A person in active addiction spends less time socializing 
in order to abuse their drug of choice more. AND a codependent 
spends less time socializing in order to spend more time with the 
object of their codependency.  
■ Addiction: I’ll have more fun staying in and getting drunk/high 
■ Codependent: I’ll have more fun staying in with him. He needs 
me more than them. I can’t leave him or ….  
○ Sneaking/Lying: A person lies about the true nature of their 
addiction so that they can continue using. AND a codependent lies 
to others to enable the person’s behavior and/or their own. 
■ Addiction: I lied about spending the night at a friend’s house 
(or working late) so that I could go drinking without anyone 
knowing.  
■ Codependent: He was too drunk to go to work so I called his 
boss and lied for him. I lie to my friends about how much time 
we spend together.  
○ Euphoric Recall: A person romanticizes the feeling of using drugs or 
alcohol. AND a codependent romanticizes the feelings back when 
things were better rather than focusing on how things are.  
■ Addiction: I would love to feel that way again.  
■ Codependent: I miss the way things used to be with us.  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Recognizing Codependent Symptoms & Behaviors:  
Using the table below and the definitions above, list examples you can think of for every 
Symptom and Behavior:  
Codependent Symptoms:  Codependent Behaviors  

Preoccupation  Rationalizing 
 
 
 

Increased Tolerance:  Minimizing 

Loss of Control  Blaming 

Denial  Sneaking/Lying 
 
 
 

Blackouts  Hiding/Secrets 
 
 
 

Craving:  Isolating: 
 
 
 

Compulsive Behaviors:  Euphoric Recall: 

Decreased Tolerance: 
 
 

Medical Problems: 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Feelings of Codependence:  
 
Instructions: With a friend or family member (not the object of codependence) go 
through each of these feelings and assign them a number between 1 and 10 for how 
strongly you feel these emotions (1 is weakest). After assigning numbers to each, go 
through all the emotions and think of examples of times you have felt these feelings.  
 
 
Feelings  1-10 

Numb or Emotionally   
disconnected. 

Anger   
 

Blaming   

Loneliness   

Sadness   

Disappointment   

Guilt   

Fear   

Shame