Personal Development: Quarter 2 - Module 17
Personal Development: Quarter 2 - Module 17
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Personal Development
Alternative Delivery Mode
Quarter 2
Module 17: Teen-age Relationships Including the Acceptable
and Unacceptable Expressions of Attractions
First Edition, 2020
Republic Act 8293, section 176 states that: No copyright shall subsist in any work
of the Government of the Philippines. However, prior approval of the government agency or
office wherein the work is created shall be necessary for exploitation of such work for profit.
Such agency or office may, among other things, impose as a condition the payment of
royalties.
Borrowed materials (i.e., songs, stories, poems, pictures, photos, brand names,
trademarks, etc.) included in this module are owned by their respective copyright holders.
Every effort has been exerted to locate and seek permission to use these materials from
their respective copyright owners. The publisher and authors do not represent nor claim
ownership over them.
This learning resource hopes to engage the learners into guided and
independent learning activities at their own pace and time. Furthermore, this also
aims to help learners acquire the needed 21st century skills while taking into
consideration their needs and circumstances.
In addition to the material in the main text, you will also see this box in the
body of the module:
As a facilitator you are expected to orient the learners on how to use this
module. You also need to keep track of the learners' progress while allowing them
to manage their own learning. Moreover, you are expected to encourage and assist
the learners as they do the tasks included in the module.
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For the learner:
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This section provides an activity which will
help you transfer your new knowledge or
What I Can Do skill into real life situations or concerns.
1. Use the module with care. Do not put unnecessary mark/s on any part of
the module. Use a separate sheet of paper in answering the exercises.
2. Don’t forget to answer What I Know before moving on to the other activities
included in the module.
3. Read the instructions carefully before doing each task.
4. Observe honesty and integrity in doing the tasks and in checking your
answers.
5. Finish the task at hand before proceeding to the next.
6. Return this module to your teacher/facilitator once you are through with it.
If you encounter any difficulty in answering the tasks in this module, do not
hesitate to consult your teacher or facilitator. Always bear in mind that you are
not alone.
We hope that through this material, you will experience meaningful learning
and gain deep understanding of the relevant competencies. You can do it!
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What I Need to Know
This module is designed and written to help you understand the concept
of relationships and family that is broad and varies from person to person. A
relationship experience is unique to all individuals but is viewed universally as a
state of connectedness that it mostly emotional in its sense. This state of close
connection between people becomes personal relationships formed by bonds and
interactions that often grow from and are strengthened by mutual experiences.
This lesson will give an idea on how to build a happier and more fruitful
relationship with others by understanding the problems people are facing and
by developing friendly relationship through effective and loving connections.
The content of this lesson is about Teen-age Relationships including the
acceptable and unacceptable expressions of attractions.
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What I Know
A. Write True if the statement is correct and write False if the statement is not
correct. Write your answer on a separate sheet of paper.
_______9. Ladies with broad shoulders and a small waist are not attractive
to men.
_______10. Intimacy is a sharing of details, emotions, and intimate thoughts
B. Write Yes if the statement is correct and write No if the statement is not
correct.
______12. Macoi has leadership and work skills but does not have good
looks. Is it attractive to ladies?
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Lesson
Understanding Personal
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Relationship
It is said that every kind of relationship is a two-way traffic which means
that all parties should learn how to give and take. There are different forms of
relationships and each of us has a clear description for each of these forms.
We certainly have our own ways of creating and improving these relationships.
Let us try to define each one of them.
In this lesson, you will be able to understand what personal relationship
really is. Personal relationship is practically the kind of relationship that we
have with our families, friends, and partners in life. This definition also applies
to our relationship with those people who are significant to us.
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What’s In
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Process Questions:
1. What are the pictures all about?
2. What did you feel after you wrote your reaction/observation to the images?
3. Have you experienced this kind of scenario before? If so, how did you
deal with it? If not yet, how will you react to this kind of situation?
What’s New
Read the poem below and answer the questions that follow.
PURPOSE OF AFFECTION
By: Jessica V. Durante
Process Questions:
1. After reading the poem, what did you feel? Why?
2. What does the writer want to tell about the line "Love is the greatest of all"?
3. How would you express affection to your loved ones if you were the author? (You
may write a poem of your own.)
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What Is It
Affection is one of human beings' greatest emotions. There is a lot of passion, but more
are conveyed in an intimate partnership with a compatible partner. Romantic attachments
are one of the most important aspects of life for these people, and a source of tremendous
fulfilment. However, the will to create a human link seems innate, which develops our ability
to build a healthy and loving relationship. Some suggest that early childhood begins to
develop the capacity to create a healthy relationship with a nanny who regularly satisfies the
child's food, treatment, comfort, protection, stimulation, and social interaction needs. Such
partnerships are not destinies, but are hypothesized to establish deeply embedded
relationship patterns with others. The end of a relationship is however also a source of
significant mental trauma.
Everybody knows when they go into a room packed with friendly faces, and
while they seem open and able to speak, there is only one face standing out from the
crowd. There may be a lot of people in the room who are physically attractive, but
you do not seem to keep your eyes away from one person.
Most people would claim that they are attracted to someone after a few
seconds of their first encounter. April Masini, who also gives ABC
Entertainment News relation advice, wrote books like Date Out of Your League,
suggests that females are naturally attracted to men who exude affection and
passion and seem to live a fascinating life. Heterosexuals tend to be attracted to
men with traditionally masculine features including muscle body, square jaw,
straight nose, and narrow eyes, physically or emotionally. These physical
properties often include higher testosterone levels, common among "alpha
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males." Alpha males display a particular personality trait, including directness,
determination, and power.
You also consider how trustworthy he or she seems to be and how loving
he or she is, in addition to how physically attractive your future partner is. Is he
calling, for instance, when he says he's going? Does she answer the phone if
you call her? Is he going to find little things and compliments? When you talk
about movies or sports you like, does she even listen to you? The building block
of deep emotional links are also common interests.
ATTRACTION
Proximity and similarity contribute to relationship-building, and
reciprocity and self-disclosure are critical for sustaining
relationships. Yet, what characteristics do we find attractive about a person?
We don't shape relationships with someone who lives or works in our vicinity,
so how do we determine which particular individuals we want as friends and
partners? Researchers have documented several characteristics which are
attractive to humans. People differ in what they consider attractive, and cultural
influences on attractiveness. Nevertheless, research indicates that some
commonly attractive characteristics in women include wide eyes, high
cheekbones, a thin jaw line, a slim build (Buss 1989), and a lower waist-to-hip
ratio (Singh 1993).
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Likewise, attractive features of men include being tall, having broad
shoulders, and a small waist (Buss 1989). Both men and women with high
levels of facial and body symmetry are commonly seen as more attractive than
asymmetric individuals (Fink, Neave, Manning and Grammer 2006; Penton-
Voak et al. 2001; Rikowski and Grammer 1999).
In future female partners, social characteristics that people consider
attractive include comfort, empathy, and social skills; in males, the desirable
characteristics include competence, leadership abilities, and work skills (Regan
and Berscheid 1997).
While humans want physically attractive mates, this doesn't mean we are
looking for the most attractive person possible. In fact, this observation has led
some to propose what is known as the matching hypothesis that asserts that
people tend to choose someone they see as their equal in physical attractiveness
and social desirability (Taylor et. al. 2011).
People weigh the attractiveness of a potential partner against the probability
of succeeding with that individual. If you believe you are particularly
unattractive (even if you are not), you would probably be looking for partners
that are fairly unattractive (i.e. unattractive in physical appearance or
behaviour).
Typically, we love the people we make relationships with, but the sort of love
we have for our families, friends, and lovers is special. Robert Sternberg (1986)
suggested that love has three components: affection, passion, and dedication.
These three components form a triangle that distinguishes many forms of love:
this is known as the triangular love theory by Sternberg.
Sternberg (1986) states that a healthy relationship will have all three
components of love – intimacy, passion, and commitment – which are described
as consummate love. At different stages of life, however, different aspects of love
may prevail more. Other types of love involve affection, described as intimacy,
but not passion or commitment. Infatuation is love without engagement or
intimacy. Empty love means engagement without passion or intimacy.
Companionate love, characteristic of close friendships and family relationships,
is affection and loyalty but there is no passion. Passion and affection describe
romantic love, but no engagement. Lastly, fatuous love is characterized by
passion and devotion but no intimacy, such as a long-term sexual love affair.
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Understanding the Acceptable and Unacceptable Means of
Expressing Attractions Toward The Opposite Sex
You have understood well the essential traits of a good relationship. This
time, allow yourself to open your mind to see the difference between acceptable and
unacceptable means of expressing attractions towards the opposite sex. In this way,
you will also have a chance to unlearn the bad practices that you have in showing
how attracted you are to someone.
Filipino society has set standards for terribly unacceptable way to demonstrate
someone's attractions against those who are practically acceptable. Perhaps you are
asking why it is important to understand and realize these things.
Filipino culture is bound to believe that a decent display of someone's feeling is
also a must to be accepted by society. It is a major disappointment that anyone who
fails to follow this standard will be classified as poorly educated by society or the
community, or how one’s parents failed at parenting.
Because of the Filipinos’ culture of decency, the Republic of the Philippines
seriously believed that the issues of people's means of expressing attractions to the
opposite sex or gender can be legally addressed. The Republic Act (RA) 11313,
otherwise known as the Safe Space Act, intentionally prohibits indecent and
unlawful acts of expression. This RA broadens the scope of the RA 7877 or the Anti-
Harassment Act of 1995. This law recognizes that sexual harassment occurs in the
workplace, education, and training environments, and penalizes persons who have
authority, influence, and moral status in those institutions who commit prohibited
acts of sexual harassment. While the Safe Space Act addresses these gaps in our
legal framework by recognizing that sexual harassment can be committed between
peers. A good example of this are: a subordinate to a superior, a student to a
teacher, or a trainee to a trainer.
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3. Honesty. This one goes hand-in - hand with confidence, because when
one of you is not honest, it is difficult to trust another. Have you ever
caught your partner in a total lie? Like when she told you that she / he
was occupied with homework, but it turned out that she / he was talking
to friends? You're going to have a lot of difficulty believing the next time
she / he says she / he has to work and the trust will be on dangerous
foundations.
4. Support. It is not only in difficult times that you should be supported by
your partner. Usually, when the whole world is falling apart, we thought
that this is the only time we need support from others. Even in your best,
you still need support and when time gets tough, your significant other
should still be there. For instance, your partner should be there when you
find out that your parents are breaking apart and he/she should also
rejoice with you when you get a great score.
5. Fairness/Equality. You need to have a give and a take in your
relationship. Do you take turns deciding what kind of food to eat? Are you
going out with your friends as a partner as much as you stay out with
your friends? If it is not a fair balance, you will know. When a relationship
transforms into a power struggle, with one party trying to get his or her
way all the time, changes get really fast.
6. Separate identities. In a stable relationship, everybody has to make
compromises. But that does not mean you should have the feeling that
you are losing yourself. You both had your own lives when you started out
(families, friends, interests, hobbies, etc.) and that should not change. You
should not pretend to like something that you do not like, or give up
seeing your mates, or give up something that you love. And you should
also feel free to build new abilities or interests, make new friends, and
move forward.
7. Good Communication. Are you going to speak to each other and share
the feelings that matter to you? Don't keep your emotions locked up
because you are afraid your partner does not even need to hear about it.
And if you need some time to think about something before you are ready
to talk about it, you will be provided some space by the right person to do
that.
1. Cheating
If you are in a committed, monogamous relationship, cheating should be
out of the question. Many people will say infidelity is a deal-breaker. However,
others will decide to stay with their partners after an affair, and, under the
right circumstances, it is possible to heal the relationship. If you do decide to
maintain the relationship, your partner says they will never cheat again, and
they do, it’s likely that they will continue to break your trust.
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2. Putting you down
No one has the right to make you feel bad about yourself. Whether
blatant or subtle, if your partner criticizes your looks, your hair, your laugh,
your intelligence, or anything, they’re not worth your time.
4. Controlling
You should have a life outside of your relationship, away from your
partner. It is not their place to tell you who you can see, when you can see
them, what to eat, or how to dress. This controlling behavior can be a
warning sign of physical abuse and should be taken seriously.
5. Lack of communication
You will never be able to grow together if you don’t discuss your wants
and needs. You both need to feel comfortable openly expressing your
feelings, good and bad, otherwise you might begin to resent each other.
6. Unnecessary sacrifices
7. Unreliability
When your cellphone is not working, you need advice, or you’ve just had
a bad day and need a hug, do they come to your aid? If they’re not there for
you when you need them the most, think twice: why are you with them?
9. Self-destruction
Sometimes we fall for people who are in rough situations. Though it can
be difficult, it’s important to be there for your loved ones during these times
and encourage them to seek help if necessary. However, if they are engaging in
destructive behavior that is negatively affecting you, and they refuse to seek
help, you might want to consider leaving. There is only so much you can do,
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and it is not your fault that they are not willing to help themselves.
10. Not caring about friends and family
When you want to build a life with someone, you have to accept every
part of them, including the people they care about. Your partner not making
an effort to get to know your loved ones can cause a major strain on your
relationship.
What’s More
Process Questions:
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What I Have Learned
1. __________ ______is practically the kind of relationship that we have with our
families, friends, and partners in life.
2. _______________ is a force that unites people and can grow into an
attachment which eventually leads to commitment
3. __________________ commitment to an organization like a business entity, a
principle, or purpose.
4. __________________ means engagement without passion or intimacy.
5. People differ in what they consider attractive and cultural influences on
__________________.
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What I Can Do
1. Cheating
2. Controlling
3 Unreliability
4. Lack of
communications skills
Answer table below. The situation is written on the first column. On the
second column, write the reasons why these unacceptable expression of
attractions happen; on the third column, write the possible effects of this kind
of relationship; on the fourth column, write your reactions; and your advice on
the fifth column.
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Assessment
A. Write True if the statement is correct and write False if the statement is not
correct. Write your answer on a separate sheet of paper.
_______1. Attraction is a force that unite people.
_______2. Alpha males show a specific set of personality like trait, including
directness, dedication, which strength.
_______3. Companions can go to one another in the midst of hardship.
_______4. People differ in what they consider attractive.
_______5. Relationship is a one-way traffic.
_______6. Many women claim that when they are looking for a long term
relationship partner, they are simply looking for the opposite of an
alpha male
_______7. Affection is one of the qualities in a relationship that everyone looks for.
_______8. According to research study, people differ in what they consider
attractive, and cultural influences on attractiveness.
_______9. Ladies with broad shoulders and a small waist are not
attractive to men.
_______10. Intimacy is a sharing of details, emotions and intimate thoughts
B. Write Yes if the statement is correct and write No if the statement is not
correct.
______11. Filipino culture is bound to believe that a decent display of someone's
feeling is also a must, to be accepted by society;
______12. Hil has leadership and work skills but does not have good looks. Is it
attractive to ladies?
______13. Megan dictates to her boyfriend how to dress up and what to eat. Is
this a controlling issue?
______14. Is “Love” one of the three components of a healthy relationship
according to Sternberg?
______15 Is cheating unacceptable in any relationship
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Additional Activities
Answer Key
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References
Wisecarver,2015, Prosocial Behavior Revised June 08 2015, Accessed June
03,2020 h ttps://cnx.org/contents/F7g8c9Sm@2/Prosocial-Behavior
BaronGorillaMaster,https://www.coursehero.com/file/35081925/1-PERDEV-
Personal-Relationship- A ttraction-Love-and-Commitmentdocx/ Accessed June
06,2020
Harrington, Tech Insider ,2016, Blog, Accessed June 05, 2020 1:37 PM h
ttps://www.businessinsider.com/what-men-want-in-women-2016-6
Philippine Commission on Women 2019, article h
ttps://www.pcw.gov.ph/article/safe-spaces-act-irr-signed). Accessed on June
6, 2020
Parsons, 2017 https://www.womenworking.com/10-things-unacceptable- r
elationship/ Accessed on June 7, 2020
E.C. LaMeaux accessed on June 10 2020
https://www.gaiam.com/blogs/discover/4-things-you-need-to-know-about-
attraction
Psychology Today © 2020 Sussex Publishers,
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/relationships accessed on
August 14, 2020
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