DATING

Ibrahim Zahalan
Mr.Roudy Kallas
1. What is dating?: a rundown of the definitions of the word
through time.
Prior to the 20th century, and certainly before the Industrial Revolution, marriage was a
business decision, often decided between families, and based on practical matters such as
wealth, alliance building, and politics.

. However, the changes brought by the European Renaissance, as well as increasing access to
education and wealth brought about by the industrial revolution, gave young people some
small degree of freedom when it came to their life partners; the concept of ‘calling on’ a young
woman, always in the presence of her parents or some other suitable chaperone, became more
widespread. The potential couple could at least talk and get to know each other a little bit
before it came time for their parents to decide whether the match was acceptable.

As the 20th century progressed, however, a variety of factors meant that dating became a
more common means of finding a partner. Women gained more rights and independence,
slowly but surely; at the same time, two world wars and their aftermath led to a seismic shift in
the world order, and consequently, a change in how people looked for love. As the world
became more equal, people looked to things like compatibility and love while searching for a
partner.

Although the 21st century dating scene might seem very different, it still shares a few aspects
with its predecessors. Firstly, for many people, the end game is still marriage, or at least a
serious relationship. Secondly, while family approval isn’t essential like it used to be, it’s still
important for most people that family and friends are happy with the person they’re dating. Of
course, the level of family involvement varies deeply, depending on culture and religion; it’s not
uncommon, for example, for Muslim or Hindu families to matchmake for their sons and
daughters, or for dates to be chaperoned in the more traditional of these families. Additionally,
how people date depends on their age and region; people who live in big cities might look for
love in local bars or attend events, while people who live in more rural areas might depend on
introductions from friends and family. However they choose to do it, the end goal is still the
same, however: finding love

2. The practical definition of dating:

SPENDING TIME TOGETHER

The importance of spending time together can’t be understated; that’s how people go from
acquaintances to friends or even more, after all. Luckily, unlike couples in the past, singles today
can spend time together by themselves either in public or in private. And even if they’re unlucky
enough to not be in the same region, there’s always video chat.
 SPECIAL MOMENTS IN A RELATIONSHIP

And when people spend time together, magic happens. Inside jokes, special memories and
thoughtful gifts – these are some of the small things that strong relationships are made of, and
dating gives people the opportunity to create moments like these for the special someone in their
life.

FEELINGS THAT SPARK

While you can combine time spent together with doing fun things, what tips the edge over from
friendship to dating is that special chemistry. Luckily, modern dating allows us to see if we can
share those feelings with someone before there’s any chance of a lifetime commitment

3. The purpose of dating :

The purpose of dating is not to make yourself feel better about your own loneliness. It’s also not
meant to be a way of finding someone who you want to sleep with or hook up with on the
regular.

Dating is an opportunity to get to know if someone is compatible with you for marriage. While
dating, you will get to know not only the person themselves but also their family, friends, and
home life.

In addition, dating allows people time to discover if they are truly able to commit to a long-term
relationship with that other person. It’s an opportunity for them to explore each other both
romantically while learning more about each other and their ideas.

Ultimately, dating is about finding the person you want to be with for good and then committing
yourself fully to a relationship. It’s not just an activity or something that people do when they’re
bored; it should be approached as a serious undertaking where two people come together to
see if there is potential for love and a future.

4. The different types of dating:

1. Casual dating
When dating someone casually, you probably aren’t ready to define the relationship just yet.
Instead, you are just enjoying the ride (having no strings attached
2. Open dating relationships

These dating relationships may be serious, but they have agreed to see other people at the same
time. For this to be successful, both people need to have the same life goals of wanting to see
others.
3. Toxic dating relationships

Many relationships could fall under this category, but these are generally very unhealthy
relationships that just lead to hurt, disappointment, and detriment to one’s life.

4. A fling

This is typically seen as “cheating” on a serious partner. You might say that if you were in town at a
convention, you could have a fling, something frivolous with someone you don’t plan on seeing
again.

5. Sexual dating 

Individuals in these relationships are just after one thing - sexual intercourse. They crave sexual
fulfillment in their lives. 

6. An enabling dating relationship

Usually, a person is “enabled” when their partner helps them with negative things in their life. For
example, addictions, bad habits, or unhealthy actions could be negative actions. 

7. An exclusive dating relationship

This type of dating relationship is reserved for serious people who only want to see one another
and no one else. Exclusive means you are the only person your partner is dating. If you are unsure if
you are in this type of relationship, you should ask your partner for clarity. You don’t want to make
assumptions when it comes to your heart.

8. Long-distance dating

A couple engaging in long-distance dating still wants to see each other, but unfortunately, both
people live in different locations. This could be a temporary situation like going to college in a
different state.

9. Friends with benefits

This means the people are dating other people and are just friends with each other but have sexual
relations. This kind of dating relationship can get quite complicated because one person usually
wants more out of the relationship than the other person does.
10. Intimate dating

Intimacy is all about “closeness.” When you are intimate with your partner, you bare your soul
without hesitation. You have decided you can completely trust him or her and tell them every
thought you’ve ever had. You may also engage in intimacy if you have mind-blowing, meaningful
sexual relations. 

11. Swinging

This may or may not be a serious couple, but the premise is that both parties are welcome to sexual
experiences with other couples. 

12. Serious dating

This is the opposite of casual dating. If someone is serious about their love life, they probably aren’t
speed dating in an effort to “hook up” with someone for the night. 

13. First love dating

Often, people experience love for the first time when they are merely teenagers; for some cultures,
this age is even younger. Often, when you first fall in love, you think this person can do no wrong
and may even end up marrying him or her.

14. Arranged dating

In many cultures, including American, people are “set up” with each other by their church or their
parents. Some people even “marry at first sight,” meaning they first see their groom or bride on
their wedding day! Depending on who set you up, you may have a high rate of success in this type
of dating relationship. 

15. Soulmates

There are some people that believe soulmates are arranged by God, a predestined journey. Others
learn to love each other in such an intimate way that they believe they are, in fact, soulmates. The
term can mean there aren’t multiple people “out there” for you; instead, your “soulmate” is
somewhere out there waiting for you.

16. Courtship

This is the period before marriage. It’s the time for “wooing” your partner. You may even give them
a promise ring as a symbol of your commitment to this stage in the relationship.
17. Engagement

At this point, typically, the guy has asked the girl to be his wife in the future. A ring is usually
presented during the proposal to marriage. The ring symbolizes the level of commitment each
person is giving to the relationship. 

18. Online dating

While in the past online dating had a bad reputation, it’s actually a popular way today for people to
date. There are many dating applications and websites geared toward helping single people find
each other with the aid of all that technology. 

19. Blind dating

Blind dates occur when a girl or guy is “set up” by friends, family members, or other individuals (or
even companies). This method of dating is often seen as a “last resort” to those who have found
themselves to be unlucky in love. However, there are plenty of instances where blind dates have
led to successful marriages.

20. Speed dating

Speed dating is often arranged by a company so that individuals can find partners in a group setting.
A timer may be involved, allowing you to only spend a “set amount of time” with an individual
before switching to another person. At the end of the night, you receive a list or index cards of
those who want to continue getting to know you.

21. Platonic dating

This is sexless dating, but it doesn’t mean romance is not involved. Many couples decide to wait
until marriage before having sex, so they enter into platonic relationships. Other platonic
relationships may include friends, acquaintances, or family members. If you are dating someone
without sex, you may have a reason for doing so. 

22. One-night stands

These are typically not positive experiences because you’re drunk or incapacitated the night before
when you had sex with the individual, you woke up next to. Some people view these as “mistakes”
or “regrets,” but there are “serial daters” who love having a variety of sexual partners with no
commitment or expectations involved.
5. The stages of dating:
It may seem pretty obvious, but relationships – whether romantic or platonic – grow with time
and undergo distinct changes as bonds are formed and intimacy is developed. As your
relationship evolves through each of these stages, you’ll learn more about each other and
determine if you and your partner are committed and destined for a lifetime together.

If you’ve begun dating someone new or if you’re unsure at what stage your existing relationship
is at, this blog is for you. Below, we’re going to talk you through each of the five stages of dating,
so you can work out where you and your partner are right now and more importantly, whether
your relationship has the strength to flourish into a long-term commitment.

1. Attraction

Attraction is the first stage of dating, and plays a fundamental part in whether the connection can
develop into something more. Whether you meet each other naturally whilst out with friends,
family, or acquaintances, through a matchmaker or on online dating sites or apps, there has to
be an element of attraction between each couple for it to develop into something romantic. Often
known as the honeymoon phase, this is the stage at which everything feels very new and
exciting and seems almost perfect.

This stage often lasts for the first few months of your courtship and will see constant
communication between the couple with lots of messaging back and forth on different channels
such as texting, dating sites, social media ,long phone calls and video calls in the evenings on
the days that you are not together. You will also find that during this period you will go on lots of
dates and make time to get to know more about one another before you decide whether to take
things to the next level.

2. Reality

Stage two is reality, and it tends to creep up on you slowly and can last for around six months.
This signals the end of the honeymoon phase and is the point at which you might start to see
flaws in your partner and notice things that annoy you.

This doesn’t mean you no longer like or love each other; it’s just reality and life setting in and
you tend to become more aware of your partner after the rush of hormones has subsided. For
example, you may find that as you start spending more time together you notice little quirks or
habits that you might not have noticed at first.

Unfortunately, it is this second stage where lots of relationships fail. But the good news is, if you
make it past this stage this is a good sign of things to come.

3. Commitment

Once you get past the reality stage, you enter the commitment phase. At this point, you express
a desire to be with each other exclusively and you have grown to not only recognise but accept
the flaws that may come with your partner.

This agreement to commit to each other regardless of circumstances also means accepting their
dreams, goals, wants and needs in life. This could mean things like deciding where you want to
live together, helping them to achieve career goals and discussing plans for the future. 
 4. Intimacy

Stage four is intimacy and this typically involves nurturing the true love that has been cultivated
over the last year or so. Contrary to popular belief, this stage doesn’t just relate to physical
intimacy either, it’s also about connecting beyond the superficial.

Once two people have bonded with each other, this is when true love really begins. This stage
usually means opening up to one another and really letting your guard down. For the first time in
the relationship, you will become vulnerable without holding back, learning about each other’s
pasts and deeper feelings and seeing their true character in a new light.

5. Engagement

The final stage is engagement and blissful love. This is where you ultimately decide to pledge a
lifelong commitment to your partner and take things to the next level. This level of commitment
comes with working together to plan a happy and fruitful future with each other.

Even though you have made a commitment, it doesn’t mean that your relationship will be
without its ups and downs in the future. The important thing is to learn to apologise and forgive
when things go wrong and instead work together as a solid partnership to overcome any
challenges that life throws your way.

6. The aspects of healthy dating:

1: Open communication
One hallmark of a healthy relationship is the ability to communicate openly. Significant others
should be able to talk about how they’re feeling and empathize with one another.

If it’s difficult to share true feelings with the other person, it may mean more trust needs to be built.
Holding back feelings could mean that we aren’t sure how the other person will respond or we’re
afraid of being judged. Oftentimes, especially in a new relationship, it means we’re still learning how
to communicate effectively with one another.

However, communication can become unhealthy when one partner in the relationship feels the
need to influence the other person’s thoughts or behavior. In this situation, it can be helpful to set
boundaries. Expressing your needs and naming your limits are just two examples of healthy
boundary-setting, and a healthy relationship is one where boundaries are honored.

2: Listening and feeling heard

Having someone listen to us and feeling heard is important. In a healthy relationship, both people
should feel relatively comfortable bringing up issues, expressing themselves and listening to one
another. While not every conversation is going to be easy, both partners should feel that they will
be heard.
When a person’s feelings or needs are ignored or not respected, the relationship can suffer. It’s
important for both partners to make space for the other person. Compromise and ongoing
communication are key in respecting each other’s feelings, needs and values. But compromise
should not always be one way.

If one partner actively disrespects, ignores or demeans the other, this is abusive. Partners who
behave this way may also treat someone’s ideas or feelings with contempt.

3: Working through disagreements

Disagreements and conflict are normal in any relationship. It’s common to have different
preferences, beliefs and values from our significant other. In some cases, conflict can be a sign that
something needs to change within a relationship. Many times, couples who ignore or avoid conflict
risk facing increased tensions and unmet needs. However, the way couples respond to conflict is
more important than the conflict itself.

Working through a disagreement in a healthy way by talking respectfully and listening to understand
each other is an important component of any relationship, whether it’s with a friend, family
member or significant other. We can’t assume that someone can see an issue from our point of
view.

If disagreements turn into fights more often than not, it may be time to evaluate how you’re
communicating with one another. Try using “I” statements to soften language and use assertive
communication. For example, “I would like you to stop doing that,” is a healthier way to say “you
need to stop doing that.
If conflict escalates and feels difficult to resolve, it can sometimes cause us to fear disagreeing with
our partners because it may trigger a partner’s anger, abuse or violence. Partners may resort to
belittling the other person during disagreements. These are all signs that it may be time to reach out
for support

4: Mutual intimacy
Healthy romantic relationships allow space and mutual respect for intimacy and connection.
Partners are able to establish healthy boundaries and talk openly about emotional and physical
desires and what that looks like in their relationship. This includes talking about sex, such as what
you want and don’t want and what feels good (or doesn’t). This requires attention and ongoing
communication in healthy relationships.

If one or both partners feels embarrassed or unwilling to say how they feel because they’re worried
their partner may not listen or care, it can make intimacy more stressful than enjoyable. If one
partner’s needs and wants are ignored or if they are pushed into situations that are upsetting or
unwanted, this is a sign of abusive behavior.

5: Trust
It’s important to maintain relationships outside of our romantic relationships in order to have a
strong support system. In healthy relationships, significant others trust one another. Trust is about
knowing that someone will do what they say. It also can mean that each person in the relationship
feels free to spend time with other people in their life like friends and family.
 A relationship can become unhealthy when one person feels jealous every time their partner talks to
or spends time with other people in their life. If one partner is accusing the other of flirting
constantly or tells their partner not to talk to or interact with another person in their life, these may
be signs of abusive behaviors and mistrust. These types of behavior can lead to feelings of isolation
and symptoms of depression or anxiety.

7. References:
https://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/what-is-dating/

3 Purpose of dating and Why They Matter Today (honeyletstalk.com)

https://askapril.com/types-of-dating/

https://ignitedating.co.uk/the-5-stages-of-dating/

https://www.colorado.edu/health/5-essentials-healthy-relationship