Theories of the Self 1

Theories of the Self

Donna Barrows

Northern Oklahoma College Principles of Sociology

1220 E. Grand Ave, Tonkawa, Oklahoma 74653

Abstract

In this essay we will be discussing the progression of ones “Self.” It will be covering 4 theories

of how the self develops, and takes a shape to form a personality of sorts. All references

provided have a similar prospective with how one views themselves, and different processes to

achieve it. The way human nature develops, and how we utilize those learned mechanisms to

form opinions of others in society. Those evaluations then cause us to reflect upon ourselves to

form a perspective. We then behave according to what we think other people’s perspective of us

is.
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Theories of the Self

Charles Cooley once quoted, “I am not who you think I am; I am not who I think I am; I

am who I think you think I am.

This is my new favorite quote. What does it take to understand what that means? What

process took place in order to understand the complexity of a single quote? Through specific

interactions, and a little cause and effect, our brains develop responses to every interaction.

Eventually this leads us to have an internal conversation with ourselves about the perception of

other people. We subconsciously analyze what we think they are thinking in comparison to what

we are thinking.

Developmental Stages in Social Learning

Jean Piaget is a Swiss Psychologist who specialized in the development of children. Piaget

developed a social learning theory describing a person’s thought process of interaction with their

environment. In this theory there are 4 stages of intellectual development. The first is Sensory

Motor. This stage is typically from birth to 2 years old. Reflexes are developed, along with

reactions and coordination. These are natural instincts designed to aid in survival. Preoperational

is second, and involves ages 2-7. At this stage a child believes objects have emotions like

themselves, and that everyone has the same perceptions. This is why children have imaginary

friends, or talk to their toys. With the concrete operational stage next, including 7-11years of age,

they begin to be able to distinguish groups, sort, and even notice Hierarchy. The last stage in this

development is Formal operational. This age group is 12 and up. At this level the child is

developing deductive reasoning, and can make predictions of occurrences based on past

experiences.
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Kendra Cherry with (Very Well Mind Developmental Psychology in 2022) states that “A

schema is any concept or idea of how the world works.” This is the basic instinct that children

start development with. It is not until developing new ideas by experience, and adding them to

the original schema, that the child starts to understand better what the actual concept is.

Perception

Perception is formed when interaction and experiences from those interactions

with others fit together forming a concept in your head. George Mead’s (I, Me, and Generalized

other), states that children are their own focus of their world. They lack the ability to see the

perspective of someone else. With increased age they begin to worry only about the perspective

of those close to them such as: Teachers, Parents, or their friends. He said that play develops the

self by pretending, and taking on roles in which they get to express expectations helps to develop

the social relationship understanding. As more mature stages are prominent that is where his

theory of I, Me, and Generalized other comes in. “I” is a response to “me”. “Me” is my social

self. My social self is what the “generalized other” sees me as. Therefore “I” tries to understand

what the perceptions of the “generalized other” mean to “me”. This is our brains way of our

subconscious breaking down the person we choose to let society see us as.

Interaction

Theory framework comes from the idea that the human mind is social. Humans make an

image of themselves based on their interaction with other people. The internal evaluation of who

we think we are is what we show socially. We try to see how others think of us, and change

based on who society thinks we should be. “Our identity in a constant relationship with society.”

As Tim Squirrell, PHD states his blog (Understanding Charles Cooley’s Looking Glass Self)

May 15, 2017. He showed examples of how even if someone enjoyed something on their own, a
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negative social experience with it could cause for them to completely change. Thus causing them

to conform to a social normal of going without said experience.

The Unconscious Mind

The Psychological theory of Sigmund Freud shows significant studies of the

unconscious mind. Some of these studies included free association. This basically calling out the

first thing that comes to mind when you hear a word, or see a picture. This helps dive deep in the

underbelly of the thought process. The goal of this theory is to get Freud’s clients to express only

their true feelings. He broke his research down to 3 basis of thought. Natural impulse explains

how when you act on something that is just basic instinct. The super ego is what you should do

morally. This is what society wants you to do. Finally the Ego its self is half natural impulse and

half super ego, allowing you to do a bit of both. When getting the urge of a natural human nature

call, yet living with a subconscious need to please society, it can cause some confusion for your

self-identity.

Conclusion

In conclusion, the perspective thought is developed. It comes from learned experiences,

and emotions tied to those experiences. The perceptions in one’s brain is easily deflected to how

they think society sees them back. The four theories used in this research complement one

another in the sense that society absolutely plays a huge part in the development of one’s self.

The concept of how it achieves this is the difference.

References

*Kate Votaw (Nov. 17, 2020). Freud & Psychoanalytic Theory. University of Missouri: Libre

Texts Social Sciences.

*Kendra Cherry (May 2, 2022). Piaget’s 4 Stages of Cognitive Development. Very Well Mind.

Website Developmental Psychology.

*Tim Squirrell, PHD (May 15, 2017). Understanding Charles Cooley’s Looking Glass Self.

Timsquirrell.com/blog2017.

* Agnes E. Dodds , Jeanette A. Lawrence, & Jaan Valsiner (Aug. 1, 1997). The personal &

Social. Sage Journals Theory & Psychology.