Personal Purpose And Values

How to Find Your Purpose

by Ayse Yemiscigil, Melis Sena Yılmaz, and Matthew T. Lee
September 15, 2023

HBR Staff; mikkelwilliam/dimapf/Getty Images

Summary. Do you know what your “purpose” is? If you’re eager to find it, here are
three actions you can take right now to move forward:
1. Seek out new experiences and reach beyond yourself. It’s important to cultivate
your passions and seek out experiences that can reveal how your interests can
 contribute to others’ lives in ways that are personally meaningful. Ask yourself:
Who or what inspires me to get out of my comfort zone and connect with the
world beyond me? What is a simple first step I can take right now to start
exploring socially useful career opportunities?
2. Reflect on your experiences. Experience, however, is not enough. It’s important
to reflect on your experiences and find meaning in them. Some reflection
questions you can ask yourself include: How did this experience shape who I
am? How did it impact my values and worldviews? Your answers will help you
gain insight into the aspects of the experiences you’ve most enjoyed, derived
meaning from, and want to continue pursuing.
3. Discuss your life goals and gather feedback. Once you’ve done some personal
self-reflection, it’s important to discuss your aspirations with your peers (not
just with a therapist, coach, or counsellor). These conversations can give you
diverse perspectives and help see your goals in a new light. You might share
with your friend: “I have been thinking about what I want from life lately and
would love to share some of my ideas with someone. Do you have time to talk? I
would enjoy learning about your life goals as well.” close
Do you feel like you have a strong sense of purpose guiding your
career aspirations?

Purpose can be defined as an overarching intention that is

personally meaningful to you and of consequence to the world
beyond yourself. Your purpose can help you organize your life,
give you a clear direction, and motivate you — especially when
you encounter life’s inevitable setbacks and disappointments.

For example, maybe you’ve always had a strong desire to

contribute to the greater good, leading you to pursue a career in
medicine or nonprofit work. Or maybe you’re most energized
when lifting up others and want to entertain them through a
creative career. Or maybe, you’re still figuring out your purpose —
that’s okay too. In fact, one estimate suggests that only a fifth of
young people have a clear idea of their purpose.
Finding your purpose early in life can benefit you in many ways.
Those who report a strong sense of purpose at younger ages tend
to have better mental health and are more resilient against
setbacks. Finding your purpose is also a precursor to being an
effective leader, and working in a meaningful career that can
make a positive impact.

So, what does it take to find your purpose?

How to Find Your Purpose

To learn more about the role purpose plays in our lives, we
conducted an in-depth, mixed-methods study with about 400
students graduating from high school. We first identified
“purposeful students” by measuring their sense of purpose
quantitatively through questions such as “To what extent do you
feel a sense of purpose and direction in life,” and “How much of
your daily activities are guided towards a meaningful long-term
goal?”

Then, we focused in on the participants who reported feeling the

most confident in their purpose — around 20% of respondents.
We analyzed these students’ responses to open-ended questions
about how they think about purpose, and how their parents,
friends, and families support their exploration of it.

If you’re eager to identify your own purpose, our research

revealed three critical actions you can take right now to help you
find it.

1) Seek out new experiences and reach beyond yourself.

Our data revealed that the first step to finding your purpose is to
engage in diverse life and career experiences. Those who reported
a strong sense of purpose in our research spent a significant
amount of time cultivating their passions — in everything from
biology to art. Further, they did not wait for their passions to
simply appear one day. Just as research shows, their passions
grew out of skillful engagement with an active pursuit of their
interests.

But personal interest and passion is only one piece of the puzzle.
One’s purpose begins to emerge more fully when we find ways to
connect our interests to the world beyond ourselves. For young
people in our data, this meant engaging in experiences that
showed them how their interests can help them contribute to
others’ lives in ways that are personally meaningful.

For example, many of our participants shared the impact of

engaging in “socially useful” opportunities, such as volunteer or
nonprofit work, shadowing teachers or medical professionals, or
engaging with for-profit jobs and entrepreneurship that
contribute to the greater good. To explore socially useful
opportunities, purposeful students in our research reached out to
their social networks to find internships or meet with
professionals to learn from their experiences in these types of
roles.

They also specifically highlighted the benefits of being in

environments where they could meet people from diverse
socioeconomic backgrounds. For some, these environments were
accessible at school, while others discussed pursuing these
environments through internships, extracurricular activities, or
other programs outside of school. Seeking out diverse experiences
can provide you with perspective about social issues and help you
further clarify your values and beliefs. One high-purpose student
stated, “This multicultural environment led me to have a better
vision of life.”

But it’s not just about collecting experiences. Purposeful students

also expressed a commitment to applying what they learned
through their experiences to take moral action every day. They
expressed considerations about what creates good or bad
outcomes for others and mentioned wanting to “do the right
thing” and help others in their lives whenever they could.

These types of experiences, however, won’t just fall into your lap.
As we learned from these purposeful young people, finding one’s
purpose requires active participation in life. If you’re eager to
gather more life experiences to help you define your purpose, but
you don’t know where to start, ask yourself these questions:

Who or what inspires me to get out of my comfort zone and

connect with the world beyond me?

How can I connect meaningfully with individuals and

communities with different backgrounds, beliefs, and
values than mine?

What is a simple first step I can take right now to start

exploring socially useful career opportunities?

2) Reflect on your experiences.

Experience, however, is not enough. Our research also found that
purposeful people tended to combine their varied life experiences
with self-reflection. Our data showed that these individuals not
only recollected their activities — they also remembered the
impressions that those experiences left on them. As one student
said:
 My parents are doctors themselves, so even when I was little,
when I got to see them in action in the hospital, it was very
interesting for me to see them work. I also got to see the
impact their work had on people from ways in which people
thanked them, from kind words and phone calls to small
presents. I fell in love with the concept of doing what you
love and being helpful to humankind at the same time. As I
grew up, not only did this feeling stay in me, I wanted to
become a doctor too. So, my parents just being themselves,
getting me into their classes or operating rooms, and telling
me what they do in detail helped me during my process of
purpose discovery.

Not all reflection, however, will bring you insight into your
purpose. Your reflection must be directed at finding positive
meaning — psychologists call this adaptive reflection. As you
reflect on your experiences, ask yourself the following questions
to help you gather insights about your purpose:

How did this experience shape who I am? How did it impact
my values and worldviews?

What was most challenging for me in this experience? What

strengths showed up as I overcame these challenges? How
can I make sure that others do not suffer from the same
challenges?

What were some of the gifts of this experience? Who am I

grateful for and how do I want to give back?

It is also important that your reflections stretch beyond yourself

and help you connect to your greater place in the world.
Therefore, you may want to critically think about what is going on
around you and how you can contribute. This type of “moral
discernment” is important for determining your purpose. The
following questions can help kickstart these reflections:

What is an issue that affects others that keeps me up at

night?

Which local or global problem am I most capable of

addressing given my strengths and skills?

In what ways might my emerging goals and aspirations

harm or benefit others?

Your answers will help you gain insight into the aspects of the
experiences you’ve most enjoyed, derived meaning from, and
want to continue pursuing.

3) Discuss your life goals and gather feedback.

In our research, those with a strong sense of purpose also reported
frequently talking about their life goals and interests with their
friends. They felt these conversations gave them diverse
perspectives and helped them see their goals in a new light. As
one student said: “When we share our goals with each other, I
think it really helps us see why we want what we want in life.”
Students also experienced emotional benefits such as feeling
energized: “When my friends are passionate and excited about
their own career goals, it motivates me to get excited about mine.”
Or less anxious: “We discuss our future plans together, which
makes me feel a little bit calmer about my future.”

Here are some relational (rather than transactional) prompts you

can use to kickstart these types of conversations:

I have been thinking about what I want from life lately and
would love to share some of my ideas with someone. Do you
 have time to talk? I would enjoy learning about your life
goals as well.

I would appreciate a sounding board as I think about my

future. Would you play this role for me? I would be happy to
do the same for you.

I am curious, what are your plans for the future? What kind
of life do you want live? What energizes you the most as you
look into the future?

In addition to discussing your goals, it’s important to seek

feedback during these conversations. Our research found that
purposeful students often relied on the positive feedback they
received from their counsellors, parents, teachers and friends to
help solidify their purpose.

Feedback from others can often carry significant information

about ourselves, showing us where our strengths lie, and directing
our energy into areas where we can have the largest impact.

Here are some questions you can ask to uncover this valuable
feedback:

You’ve known me for a long time. What do you think are

some of my greatest strengths? What am I really good at?

Thinking about our relationship, how do you think I

contribute to your life? Are there some things that I do to
improve your life that others don’t?

I wonder if you’ve noticed… what are the moments that I

shine? When do I seem most energized and excited?
Balancing Your Approach
It’s likely you already engage in some of the activities above in
one way or another. For example, you might naturally find
yourself seeking out new experiences. Or you may already enjoy
journaling and find self-reflection an easy pursuit. Or maybe
you’re a social butterfly, always bringing honesty and insight to
your conversations with friends.

The key to truly finding and living your purpose, however, is to

continuously engage with and balance all three actions. If you’re
struggling to identify your purpose, consider where you may fall
on this diagram:

See more HBR charts in Data & Visuals 

You may be a highly reflective individual, always thinking about

your goals and strengths. And you may be very social, always
talking with and learning from others. However, you may be
lacking in life engagement. If this sounds like your experience,
you might be a “ruminator.” Based on our research, you should
focus your efforts on participating in diverse experiences and
finding ways to take specific action on an issue of concern for you.

Or, you may be very actively engaged in your purpose exploration

already — always jumping from one life experience to another,
talking to others, and consistently receiving feedback. But you’re
not spending time on your own to reflect and synthesize these
experiences. If this sounds like you, you may be “over-socialized.”
Keeping a contemplative journal can help you move forward.

Another possibility is that you may be very reflective and engaged

with life but not connecting with others enough. When you are
missing out on social feedback, you may be too self-focused. If
this sounds familiar, it may be time to engage in some intentional
conversations and explore diverse viewpoints.

By taking these actions, based on what you need most, you can
fall into the “ideal discovery-of-purpose zone,” which will help
you clarify and move forward with your purpose.

...
As you take stock of what you’ve learned from this process and
start to engage with the building blocks of purpose discovery,
expect your purpose to slowly crystallize. Your purpose may
become something you can articulate — a mission statement that
you can put in your social media bios or on your resume. Or
maybe, it’s simply something you live by day-to-day — a lens
through which you navigate the world.

Either way, discovering and living out one’s purpose is a life-long

pursuit. Taking these actions does not mean your purpose will
automatically arise or that your journey will be free of struggle
and confusion. But these proactive behaviors can help you form
the building blocks of your emerging sense of purpose, and
discover a deeper shared purpose with others.

Author’s note: We thank The Koç School and Vehbi Koç Foundation
for their collaboration and financially supporting this research.

AY
Ayse Yemiscigil is an Assistant Professor of
Organizational Behavior at the Gabelli School
of Business at Fordham University, a Research
Affiliate with the Human Flourishing Program
at Harvard University, and a Research Fellow at
the International Humanistic Management
Association. See her website here.

MY
Melis Sena Yılmaz is a Research Executive and
a graduate student in Economics at Boğaziçi
University, Turkey. She is the author of
children’s fantasy novels.

ML
Matthew T. Lee is a Professor of the Social
Sciences and Humanities at the Institute for
Studies of Religion at Baylor University and a
Research Associate with the Human
Flourishing Program at Harvard University.