Sexuality

Gods gift

God wants everyone to be happy. He gave us the capacity to love and be loved. He established certain principles so that this can become a reality.

In their rush to find so-called "love", many people fall into illicit sexual relationships. Instead of being a blessing, as God wills, these bring a suffering that steals their peace and dreams, leaving most people with a broken heart.

God knows the consequences of sexual relationships outside marriage. He intends you to understand His purposes so that you wait for His timing. He will bring you the ideal person, who will make you happy and together you will fulfil His purpose.

SEX IS A CREATION OF GOD

God created man and placed him over all creation. Nevertheless, out of all creation there was found no helper for Adam. "So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him." (Genesis 2:20). So God took a rib out of Man and created Woman.

"And Adam said this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man." Genesis 2:23

Studying the Hebrew text reveals that these words imply great emotion, joy and surprise. It is most probable that Adam did feel these considering that up until then all he had seen were animals. When he saw the woman, so similar but yet so distinct, he said, "This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh." He expressed the

satisfaction he felt in knowing that she

was the perfect complement to himself and exactly what he needed.

And so, God celebrates the first wedding and unites them as a couple: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." Genesis 2:24

The last part of the verse "they shall become

one flesh" refers to couple's intimate physical union the sexual aspect. This is not shameful. On the contrary it reflects the freedom of knowing each other without inhibitions.

God looks at sex as something natural. It pleases Him when it is experienced within His set parameters. He delights in love when it is honest and complete. The Song of Solomon is an expression of the love between a man and wife, and a reflection of how intimate God wants marriage to be.

From the beginning there has existed an affinity and mutual attraction between the two sexes. Relations among those of the same sex were not within God's plan. Otherwise, God would have given Adam another Adam instead of Eve. This wrong type of relationship is the fruit of forgetting God, and becoming wise in your own mind, giving yourself over to something that does not please the Lord.

"Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due." Romans 1:27

These and other practices have emerged as a result of the fall of man. They have changed the parameters set down by God. They see sex as something purely for pleasure that should be experienced whenever you desire it, and with whoever you desire.

Some young people use sex to ensure that their partner will not leave them. In the end, these deceptions leave a profound feeling of loneliness, an inner emptiness, emotional conflicts, sexually transmitted diseases (including AIDS), unexpected pregnancies and forced marriages among other things.

WHY WAIT & HAVE SEX ONLY IN MARRIAGE?

Though God Himself created sex for a good purpose, society has turned it into something degenerate, dirty and distorted. Besides creating pressure through the means of communication (television, magazines, radio, telephone and the internet, etc.) society aims to trap people in illicit sex.

The strategies vary from nudity (programs containing sex scenes that excite the imagination) to suggestive and explicit advertising promoting

premarital sex.
Premarital sex portrayed as normal and adultery is justified when the partner is no longer satisfying or attractive.

Many people let themselves become entangled in illicit sexual relationships without thinking of the following consequences: We sin against God

We develop a guilt complex

Negative consequences arise in your life Your testimony is ruined

WE SIN BEFORE GOD

When we give in to sexual relations outside of marriage we are sinning before God. The Word says in 1 Corinthians 6:13: "Food for the stomach and the stomach for foods, but God will destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.

Every sin committed with the body is done

against the Lord. This includes

fornication, adultery and homosexuality. 1Corinthians 6:9-10 tells us that no one who practices these sins will inherit eternal life.

From the instant we open our heart to the Lord; the Holy Spirit comes and abides in our lives. John 14:17 teaches us: "The Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.

The fact that God is in us makes our body His temple, and if we practice sexual sins we insult the temple of the Holy Spirit.

When you fall into these shameful sins, Solomon's saying is fulfilled: "Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant. But he does not know that the dead are there, that her guests are in the depths of hell." Proverbs 9:17-18

We sin against God and give in, when we believe what others say. "You don't know what you are missing!" or, "You're not into anything!" Many have fallen trying to be in line with their friends, trying whatever they say. An active sexual life, outside of God's will, takes away your peace and creates a feeling of insecurity concerning God. It is accompanied by a terrible fear about what could happen as a result.

GUILT COMPLEX
Sin always appears to be pleasant and agreeable at first sight. What's more, many are trapped into believing nothing serious will happen as long as they know when to stop in time. That is how many get caught in the world of pornography and end up with serious guilt problems, slavery, and addictions. Their selfesteem is very low and they are incapable of sustaining a healthy emotional relationship with someone of the opposite sex.

I once read about the case of a man who found a pornographic magazine in the garbage. He picked it up, read it, and from that time on became addicted to pornography. Since he was timid it was easier for him to practice masturbation than to win a young lady and start a relationship with her. But as our sin nature can never be quenched, but always wants more, he started raping and murdering young ladies.

He was finally caught, after killing 17 of them. This incident reflects how sin can enter our lives subtly, and if we allow its free reign it can enslave us and lead us into terrible actions. Maybe you think, "I will never fall into such extremes!" or, "My heart will never allow me to become so evil!" But nevertheless, directly or indirectly, many have practiced murder through abortion.

Abortion is as much murder as mass

murder. Many justify their crime saying that the fetus is only a mass of cells, but the Psalmist reminds us that: "Your eyes saw my substance, being yet informed. And your book they all were written the days, fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them." Psalm 139:16

From the very moment of conception we become a human being created by God and have contact with the Creator who gave us life. You should neither practice nor become an accomplice to abortion you do not have the right to decide over the life of a defenseless person. If you do, you will bring a curse over your life and Proverbs 14:12 will be fulfilled: "There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death."

You will be filled by a deep agony when you realize that it was a life and there is now nothing you can do to change things. You will feel pain when you see a child and think how old yours would be, and what he would be like if he were alive. Those who promote abortion will never tell you the consequences, but those who have experienced one know that they are real and painful.

Naturally, every sexual sin leaves a guilt complex, shame, and a web of deceit. Many think they are no longer worthy of being loved. They become possessive in their relationships and end up begging for love, accepting physical, sexual, and emotional abuse. Some conform to being "someone else" in a relationship in order to keep it alive.

IT BRINGS NEGATIVE CONSEQUENCES TO YOUR LIFE

The painful, personal consequences of sexual sin can remain in effect for the rest of someone's life. Many have fallen at a time when they least expected to. David, the king of Israel, is a clear example. One day, he was walking out on his palace terrace when he saw a very beautiful woman bathing. Not caring if she was married or not, he took her for himself and slept with her and she became pregnant.

Some might say that David simply obeyed his masculine impulses. But I think he fell because he gave his mind the freedom to wander and imagine whatever it pleased. What is more, his idleness also contributed to the sin. Instead of going to battle with his people, he was wasting his time at home.

Laziness is not a good influence as it

opens doors into our minds to things we should not think about. Once conceived in our mind these thoughts lead to sin and spiritual death.

This is what James teaches when he says: "But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death." James 1:14-15

David's adventure with Bathsheba, wife of Uriah, did not end there.

When David found out about her pregnancy, he sent for her husband and tried everything to make him sleep with her and cover up his sin. Uriah did not go to his house because his companions and nation were at war. Uriah's faithfulness caused David problems. He saw that the easiest way out would be to send a letter with Uriah to Joab, the general of his army. He ordered Uriah to be left alone in heavy battle so that he would be killed.

David's orders were carried out and Uriah

died on the frontline.

Bathsheba was taken to the palace after having mourned her husband. David took her as his wife and she gave him a son. A year passed, God waited for David to repent and confess his sin, but because he did not his sin eventually caught up with him.

God sent Nathan to confront David about his sin. The prophet presented the story before him of a rich man with many sheep who one day received a visitor. He went and slaughtered his poor neighbour's only lamb, one that had grown up with his children, eaten from his plate, and slept at his bosom.

When David heard the story his anger was greatly aroused against the man and said: "As the LORD lives, the man who has done this shall surely .die! And he shall restore fourfold for the lamb, because he did this thing and because he had no pity." 2 Samuel 12:5-6

After David passed judgment the prophet said, "You are the man!" Nathan, through a prophetic word, began to remind David how God called, prospered, and anointed him as king. If all that had not been enough the Lord would have given him more.

God showed David the consequences of his sin. He told David that because he had killed Uriah the Hittite and took his wife, the sword would never depart from his house. His wives would be given to his neighbor, making what he did in private happen to him in public. Lastly, the son born to David and Bathsheba would die. (2 Samuel 12:14)

If David could have determined his own judgment he would have died, but God was merciful and gave him another opportunity. Yet, he lived with the pain of the consequences for the rest of his life.

The first thing David faced was finding out his son was to die. This caused pain and anguish in his heart. He stopped eating, bathing and changing his clothes. He protested himself on the ground and humbled himself before God but the days passed and his son died. A short time after, God comforted him and gave him another son, King Solomon.

Later, he suffered seeing his children living the consequences of his past actions, David experienced sexual sin and violence in his own household. Amnon, one of his sons, raped his own sister Tamar.

Then Absalom, another one of his sons, killed Amnon out of vengeance for the affront and sexual abuse of his sister. Absalom later rebelled and tried to take David's kingdom. This caused David much anguish. "So David went up by the Ascent of the Mount of Olives, and wept as he went up and he had his head covered and went barefoot." 2 Samuel 15:30

While David fled, his son Absalom laid with his ten concubines in the sight of all Israel. (2 Samuel 16:22). These things highlight a very painful truth in David's life - that they were the consequences of his sin.

Proverbs 26:2 says: "As the bird by wandering, as the swallow by flying, so the curse causeless shall not come. Sin is not just a moment of weakness. It is a net that traps and leads to the destruction of all who fall into it.

Today, many young people experience the consequences of sexual sin. They suffer from venereal diseases such as herpes, syphilis, as well as AIDS. Some of these diseases are incurable and effect the person's children. It is terrible seeing children born contaminated with sickness that is a direct result of their parent's past sin.

After giving into premarital sex, some fall into sexual exploitation and become emotionally and physically affected. Others enter into the world of prostitution, and having become one flesh with their clients, they receive the curses that: their clients carry.

Hurt, pain, bitterness- from feeling used and abused, resentment and guilt complexes are just some of the consequences of promiscuous lifestyle.

HOW TO AVOID SINFUL SEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS

There is nothing that helps us avoid falling into sin more than being aware of its consequences. However, you must take adequate measures to enable you to stand victorious when faced by sexual temptation.

STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD

A fall does not occur as a result of waking up one day and finding your carnal nature out of control. It starts with small concessions, things which open the door to temptation and later sin. This can come about in different ways with different people.

For men, their sight is what is most susceptible. The Lord says: "You have heard that it Was said to those of old, `You shall not commit adultery', but I say to you, that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matthew 5:27

Sin begins when you look lustfully. It has been said that there is nothing wrong, with the first look - it is the second that is lust! .

The woman is most sensitive in what she

hears. If she allows compliments and

flattery from people whom she knows are not right for her (someone already married, engaged, or leading an ungodly life) she is going to have problems. She may easily become entangled in a tormenting relationship that produces negative results in her life.

The best way I can avoid a fall is by

guarding my relationship with God,

strengthening my prayer life and depending on the Word of God.

A good start is to recognize our own past sins and weaknesses, and imitate David in obtaining God's forgiveness.

"I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I have not hidden. I said, I will confess my transgressions to the LORD, and You forgave the iniquity of my sin." Psalm 32:5

We need to confess every sin to God until we experience His forgiveness and the cleansing that Christ's blood brings. That is the only way to be free from the curse sin brings.

The same must be done if you are going through temptation. If you seek God, He will give you a way out.

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you pray be able to bear it." 1 Corinthians 10:13

Determine to spend time praying and studying the Word each day. Do not permit one day to go by without talking to God and listening to His counsel. But, if in some circumstance you fail, ask God's forgiveness, confess your sin, and go on. This will guard your life from falling, and will bring profound strength that will allow you to prevail in all things.

PREPARE YOURSELF TO FACE TEMPTATION

Temptations will come when you least expect them and in the most unusual ways. It is wise therefore, to take precautions so we are not caught by surprise. Sexual insinuations and remarks are frequently used by those wanting us to give in to their flirting, sexual games, or even sex itself.

Phrases like "if you really love me, then sleep with me!", "If you won't be with me, someone else will!", "If you are really a man, prove it to me!", "Everyone does it!" or "If you ever want to see me again, you need to be more intimate with me!" are meant to pressure you into having sex without having an established commitment. You have to act wisely, and prepare yourself to confront these types of situations.

It is time to shine as children of God. Let us make a difference and show the world that we can be happy without sexual sin. We can be happy with our husband or wife, keeping our bodies for the person destined to be our lifelong mate.

Let us produce families that reflect God's love and honour those things that pleases Him.

"For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace..." Romans 6:l 4