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The Codependency Assessment

codependency assessment

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Ayanda Mmutle
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0% found this document useful (0 votes)
518 views

The Codependency Assessment

codependency assessment

Uploaded by

Ayanda Mmutle
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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ALYSSA ZANDER

CODEPENDENCY
SELF-ASSESSMENT

If you've ever felt like your relationships are more about


others than yourself, or if you find it challenging to set
healthy boundaries, this assessment is your essential ALYSSAZANDER.COM
first step towards exploring codependency.
Use this self-assessment tool to help you gauge if
codependency might be influencing your life.
Hi BB!
Since I started my coaching business I have
worked intimately with clients one-on-one,
facilitated group courses, healing spaces,
masterminds, and shared numerous
masterclasses. I felt compelled to put
together an assessment for you because the
first step for me was knowledge and
information. It allowed me to grasp
awareness of something I didn't yet have
words for, yet. My intention is that this
guidebook provides you with a lens and
language to begin to explore with
compassion and curiosity.

Alyssa Zander

click to follow on socials


SELF-ASSESSMENT
Take a moment to honestly reflect on the following questions.
Score each question on a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being "Not
Often" and 5 being "Very Often." Be as objective as possible to
gain insights into whether codependency might be playing a role
in your relationships and life.

Not Often Very Often

Do you prioritize others'


needs and feelings over
your own?

Do you find it difficult to


say "no" or set boundaries
in relationships?

Do you feel responsible for


other people's problems?

Do you often feel anxious


or uneasy when you think
someone might be upset
with you?
SELF-ASSESSMENT
Not Often Very Often

How often do you neglect


your own interests and
hobbies to cater to others?

Do you have difficulty


expressing your true
thoughts and feelings,
fearing they might upset
others?

Are you consistently seeking


validation and approval from
others to feel worthy?

How often do you stay in


unhealthy or one-sided
relationships because you
feel needed?

Do you often feel guilty or


responsible for someone
else's mistakes or choices?

Are you hesitant to ask for


help or support from others,
believing you should handle
things on your own?
SCORING
10-20 points: Minimal
signs of codependency.

21-30 points: Mild


indications of YOUR SCORE
codependent
tendencies.
.
31-40 points: Moderate
signs of codependency
that might be affecting
your well-being.

41-50 points: Strong


indicators of significant
codependent patterns.

Remember, this assessment is not a diagnosis, but rather


a tool to help you reflect on your behaviors and emotions
in relationships. If you find yourself scoring higher and
desire to explore these patterns further, Codependency
Alchemy: The Course will provide you with valuable
insights and strategies for fostering healthier
connections. You can also check out Codependency
Alchemy: The Podcast to learn more!
THE SHIFTS
So what shifts will you start seeing when you move from a place
of codependency to a space of empowerment, self-awareness,
and healthier relationships? "Present" represents what you
might be experiencing right now. "Future" represents the
possibility of what you'll experience when you begin this healing
journey.

PRESENT FUTURE
Prioritizing Others Honoring Your Needs

Seeking Validation Cultivating Self-Worth

Fear of Abandonment
vs Embracing Independence

Enabling Empowering

Authentic
Silence
Communication

Remember, this journey requires patience and self-compassion,


but the rewards of breaking free from codependent patterns are
immeasurable.
ACTION STEPS
Here are a few ways that you can begin to make the shift from
codependent patterns to empowered relationships.

THEN: You often put others' NOW: You recognize the


needs ahead of your own, importance of self-care and
neglecting your well-being in prioritize your own needs without
the process. guilt.

ACTION STEP: Take time to identify your own needs and desires.
Journal about what activities and self-care practices bring you joy.

THEN: Your sense of self-worth NOW: You no longer rely on


depends on others' approval, external validation to feel
leaving you feeling anxious and confident, allowing you to
unsure. approach relationships with
authenticity and confidence.

ACTION STEP: Examine the sources of your need for validation.


Recognize that external opinions don't define your value.

THEN: You stay in unhealthy NOW: You've embraced your


relationships because you fear independence and recognize that
being alone or unloved. your happiness isn't solely
dependent on others.

ACTION STEPS: Discover hobbies and activities that bring you joy
and help you become more comfortable with spending time alone.
ACTION STEPS
Here are a few ways that you can begin to make the shift from
codependent patterns to empowered relationships.

THEN: You often enable others' NOW: You empower others to


unhealthy behaviors, thinking take responsibility for their own
you're helping. lives and choices, fostering
healthier dynamics.

ACTION STEP: Instead of solving problems for others, offer


guidance and support as they navigate their own paths.

THEN: You keep your thoughts NOW: You communicate openly


and feelings hidden, fearing and honestly, expressing your
conflict or upsetting others. thoughts and feelings with
respect.

ACTION STEP: Practice active listening to understand others


better, which in turn encourages them to listen to you.

THEN: Boundaries feel NOW: You set clear boundaries


challenging to establish, leading that protect your emotional and
to internal frustration and mental space, fostering
exhaustion. relationships built on mutual
respect.

ACTION STEPS: Start small by setting clear boundaries in low-


stakes situations. Gradually work your way up to more challenging
ones.
"Codependency is when you
place your worth or good
feelings about yourself on
someone or something
outside of you."
Client
TestimonialS
"I've worked with a number of “Thank you so much for our call
coaches at all different levels, today, Alyssa. I feel like that
but nothing compared to a 1:1 I was more progress than literally
had with Alyssa. Not only is she months worth of therapy, so
comforting and exudes joy, but thank you for that. You are a
she is wildly intuitive and very potent person and energy.”
receptive. In under an hour, she
-Rosemary Brensen
helped me piece together how
to move through a block that "Alyssa is pure magic. Stuff is still
was suffocating every area of landing days after taking her
my life. Personal, business, course, and I feel like a whole new
relationship, future. I walked person. I am more decisive, more
away with so much clarity and productive, more focused, more
felt uplifted and supported." energetic, and more ME.
Everything is moving and flowing.
-Victoria St. Fleur
I haven't felt this normal and
functional in so long."

-Naomi White
A Journey to
Self-Empowerment
Take your learning to the next level.
Codependency Alchemy: The
Course walks you through the
shadow work, inner child healing,
and somatic healing so that you can
making lasting shifts by finally
tending to your unresolved traumas.

GET $100 OFF THE COURSE

*Use promo code COURSE


Engage with enriching video content
and workbooks that provide practical
insights and tangible next steps to
address codependency patterns in
your life.

Alyssa Zander
Codependency & Relationship Coach
Author of "Healing the Mother Wound"
Host of Codependency Alchemy: The Podcast

the antithesis of codependency


is sovereignty.
Thank-you!
I'm so excited to continue working with you,
please reach out to learn more.
Join our thriving Codependency Alchemy
community on Substack and subscribe to receive
exclusive content every week. Dive deeper into the
journey of healing and growth through thought-
provoking articles, discussions, and masterclasses
that provide ongoing support and inspiration.

JOIN SUBSTACK

Contact:
alyssazander.com
@alyssaaazander on social media
MORE RESOURCES

CODEPENDENCY ALCHEMY: "HEALING THE MOTHER


THE PODCAST WOUND: WITH MOTHER EARTH”

Join me as I share two new This book acts as a ceremony that


episodes bi-weekly. From walks you home to your true, inner
exploring a codependency pattern nature so that you can remember who
to Q&A Sessions where I coach you truly are. My hope is that you feel
someone live on the episode, seen, heard, and not alone. May these
there are lots of amazing take- poems be like nectar to the seemingly
aways every episode. bitterness of life.

FIND ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA


Stay connected and inspired by following
@alyssaaazander on Instagram, TikTok, and
YouTube. I love to connect, share my journey,
and answer your codependency and relationship
questions!

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