Cohesive

 Writing  Module:  Unit  1.  Independent  Learning  Resources    

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Cohesive  Writing  Module:  Introduction  

Introduction  
 
In  this  module,  we  will  examine  elements  of  academic  writing  that  contribute  to  making  
a  piece  of  writing  cohesive.    When  you  are  writing  assignments  at  university  the  way  
that  you  link  your  ideas  logically  through  your  text  is  by  a  combination  of  grammatical  
and  vocabulary  systems.    Each  unit  of  this  module  will  investigate  aspects  of  a  system  
and  explain  how  to  develop  skills  in  applying  these  to  your  own  writing.  
 

Who  is  this  module  for?  

 
All  students  at  university  who  need  to  improve  their  knowledge  of  clearer  paragraph  
writing.  
 

What  does  this  module  cover?  

 
Unit  1   Paragraph  Structure  
Unit  2   Linking  Themes  within  Paragraphs  
Unit  3   Cohesion  in  Word  Choice  
Unit  4   Cohesion  through  Reference  
 

Exercises  
 
These  are  marked  with  the  icon  ✪  and  you  should  try  to  complete  them  before  
checking  your  work  in  the  Answer  Key,  marked  ✪✪.    
 

Answer  Key  to  all  Exercises  

 
This  can  be  found  at  the  end  of  the  Unit.  
 
   

  1  
Cohesive  Writing  Module:  Unit  1.  Independent  Learning  Resources    
©  Learning  Centre  University  of  Sydney.  This  Unit  may  be  copied  for  individual  student  use.    

Cohesive  Writing  Module  

Unit  1:  Paragraph  Structure  
1.0   Introduction  
 
Paragraphs  are  important  elements  in  the  scaffolding  of  the  longer  texts  that  you  have  
to  write  at  university.      In  the  first  two  units  of  this  module,  we  will  be  looking  at  the  way  
that  writers  of  academic  texts  focus  on  Themes  in  their  writing,  which  help  to  show  
what  meanings  they  consider  to  be  most  important.    By  signalling  the  focus  of  a  text  in  
this  way,  the  writer  lets  the  reader  know  what  direction  the  piece  of  writing  is  going  in,  
so  that  the  reader  should  be  able  to  predict  what  is  going  to  come  next.    If  the  pattern  is  
broken,  the  reader  will  become  confused,  and  the  text  will  lack  coherence.  For  further  
information  on  paragraphs  see  Unit  3  of  the  Writing  in  an  Academic  Style  module.  
 

Objectives  of  Unit  1  

 
After  you  have  completed  this  unit  you  should  be  able  to:  
 
• recognise  how  the  paragraphs  in  a  whole  text  are  written  to  show  the  writer's  
focus  and  the  way  that  the  whole  text  is  structured    
• develop  a  logical  structure  of  ideas  and  information  in  your  own  writing  
 

1.1   The  hierarchy  of  Themes  

 
The  themes  in  a  text  are  the  beginning  points.    For  example,  the  introduction  is  the  
beginning  point  for  the  whole  text,  and  so  we  refer  to  it  as  the  macro-­‐Theme.      Then,  
each  paragraph  in  the  whole  text  has  its  own  beginning,  which  we  will  refer  to  as  the  
hyper-­‐Themes.    

Macro-­‐Theme  to  whole  text  

 
INTRODUCTION  
 
 
 

hyper-­‐Theme  1  

FIRST  PARAGRAPH  

 
 

hyper-­‐Theme  2  

SECOND  PARAGRAPH                                            etc  

 

  2  
Cohesive  Writing  Module:  Unit  1.  Independent  Learning  Resources    
©  Learning  Centre  University  of  Sydney.  This  Unit  may  be  copied  for  individual  student  use.    

Example  1  
 
The  following  example  comes  from  an  essay  in  Nursing.    The  essay  introduction  acts  as  
the  macro-­‐Theme  for  the  whole  essay  by  stating  what  the  essay  is  going  to  be  about.    
The  essay  topic  was  ‘Future  Directions  in  Nursing  Care  of  Intellectually  Handicapped  
People’.  Notice  the  way  that  the  three  areas  introduced  in  the  macro-­‐Theme  are  picked  
up  at  the  beginning  of  the  later  paragraphs  (as  the  hyper-­‐Themes).      

....I  will  look  at  a  series  of  possibilities  that  may  occur     from  the  Introduction  to  the  
with  greater  or  less  probability  in  mental  health  services,   essay  
particularly  the  nursing  care  of  intellectually  disabled    
people.    I  will  discuss  three  overlapping  areas:    general    
directions  of  nursing;    directions  for  psychiatric  nurses;     THREE  AREAS  introduced        
and  those  directions  involving  intellectually  disabled  
people.  
     
One  of  the  areas  of  general  nursing  that  is  growing  and     FIRST  AREA    
needs  to  grow  is  in  the  cure  of  people  who  are  unable  to        
manage  for  themselves,  whether  by  reason  of  illness  or   developed  in  Paragraph  3  
social  factors.  This  has  probably  come  about  through  the    
increasing  numbers  of  conditions  that  can  now  be    
treated,  the  increasing  technology  available  to  those  
disorders,  and  the  population  changes...  
   
     
 
     
If  nursing  of  mentally  ill  people  is  to  remain  an  integral     SECOND  AREA    
part  of  the  nursing  profession,  it  will  need  to  follow  the        
developments  apparent  in  general  nursing.    First  and   developed  in  Paragraph  8  
foremost,  education  will  need  to  be  of  a  tertiary  nature.      
I  regret  that  in  Western  Australia  education  of  psychiatric    
nurses  has  been  in-­‐service  hospital  training...  
     
     
I  will  now  turn  to  the  area  of  greatest  importance  -­‐  the     THIRD  AREA    
provision  of  services  for  intellectually  disabled  people.          
Since  1977  there  have  been  ten  major  government   developed  in  Paragraph  12  
reports  in  Australia  on  services  for  people  who  are    
intellectually  disabled.    All  states  have  produced  at  least    
one,  no  State  has  fully  implemented  the  
recommendations,  some  have  made  no  changes  at  all  to  
date...    
 
     

  3  
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Example  2  
 
The  following  example  comes  from  an  essay  in  Sociology.    Once  again  you  can  see  the  
pattern  in  the  way  that  the  Introduction  warns  you  about  what  is  coming  up.    The  essay  
was  written  in  response  to  this  essay  question:  ‘What  can  the  concept  of  culture  
contribute  to  our  understanding  of  society?’      As  you  read  the  section  from  the  
Introduction,  you  can  easily  predict  what  the  rest  of  the  essay  is  going  to  be  about.    
Notice  also  the  way  that  the  conclusion  paragraph  brings  all  these  ideas  together.  

The  concept  of  culture  can  contribute  to  our     Introduction  to  the  essay  
understanding  of  how  social  order  is  maintained  in  a    
society.    With  the  concept  of  culture,  one  can  better    
understand  that  the  behaviour  of  a  society  is  learned.    It   several  ways  that  culture  helps  
can  give  insight  into  why  there  are  so  many  different   us  to  understand  society  
societies  operating  in  different  ways,  or  the  other  hand,          
why  societies  are  so  similar.  
 
     
The  concept  of  culture  further  brings  an  understanding       FIRST  WAY    
of  why  the  learned  behaviours  are  reproduced  as  they   developed  in  Paragraph  6:  
are.    ....    
 
     
     
Culture  can  give  insight  into  why  there  are  so  many       SECOND  WAY    
different  societies  operating  in  different  ways    ......   developed  in  Paragraph  7:  
 
 
     
     
Cultural  universals,  practices  found  in  every  culture,  are       THIRD  WAY    
numerous,  and  although  they  vary  throughout  different   developed  in  Paragraph  9:  
societies  they  help  to  explain  that  there  are  similar    
behaviour  requirements  if  a  society  is  to  exist.  ....      
     

By  looking  at  a  society's  culture,  one  can  gain  an  insight        

into  how  social  order  is  maintained,  why  people  behave    
the  way  they  do,  and  how  a  society  seeks  to  control  and   Conclusion  
understand,  bring  meaning  to  and  organise  the  world  
around  them....  

   

  4  
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Example  3:    A  poor  essay  without  a  good  thematic  structure    

 
This  essay  was  in  answer  to  the  same  Sociology  question  as  the  one  in  Example  2  above.    
When  you  read  its  introduction  and  its  paragraph  beginnings,  you  can  see  that  at  least  
some  of  the  beginning  of  this  essay  is  spent  on  just  trying  to  define  culture.    Even  more  
importantly,  there  do  not  seem  to  be  any  answers  to  the  essay  question  about  how  we  
can  understand  society  better  through  an  understanding  of  culture.    In  fact,  almost  the  
entire  essay  is  spent  in  trying  to  define  culture,  so  that  it  simply  doesn't  answer  the  
question.  

Culture   is   a   term   used   by   social   scientists   for   a   people's     Introduction  to  the  essay  
whole   way   of   life.     In   everyday   conversation   the   word    
culture   may   refer   to   activities   in   such   areas   as   art,    
literature,   and   music.     But   to   a   social   scientist,   a   people's    
culture   consists   of   all   the   ideas,   objects   and   ways   of   definitions  of  culture  
doing   things   created   by   the   group.     Culture   includes   arts,   (does  not  address  question)  
beliefs,   customs,   inventions,   language,   technology   and  
traditions.     A   culture   is   any   way   of   life,   simple   or  
complex.  
     
The  Oxford  Dictionary  1893  defined  culture  as  "the       from  Paragraph  4:  
civilization  of  a  people  (especially  at  a  certain  stage  of  its    
development  in  history)."   dictionary  definition  of  culture  
     
     
By  1936  Webster  had  devised  a  more  scientific  meaning       from  Paragraph  5:  
for  culture  "the  complex  of  distinctive  attainments,    
beliefs,  traditions,  etc.  constituting  the  background  of  a   another  definition  
racial,  religious  or  social  group,  as  a  nation  with  many  
cultures".  
     
     
Hollsteiner  relates  culture  to  a  biological  organism,  in       from  Paragraph  7:  
that  each  of  its  parts  is  related  in  some  way  to  all  other    
parts.   definition  through  analogy  
 
     

It  is  clear  that  this  essay  is  not  answering  the  question  ‘What  can  the  concept  culture  
contribute  to  our  understanding  of  society?’    Instead,  each  paragraph  begins  a  new  point  
about  what  culture  is,  without  showing  how  it  might  help  us  understand  society.    The  
"Theme"  patterns  in  this  essay  (its  introduction,  and  its  paragraph  beginnings)  make  it  
clear  that  the  essay  does  not  answer  the  question.      
 
 If  you  think  this  may  be  one  of  the  problem  areas  in  your  writing,  then  you  should  refer  
to  the  Essay  Module,  in  particular  Unit  2.  

  5  
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2.0   Theme  patterns  within  Paragraphs  

 
Just  as  the  whole  text  or  essay  has  a  structure  which  you  can  see  in  the  introduction,  the  
paragraph  beginnings,  and  the  conclusion,  there  is  a  similar  structural  pattern  within  
each  paragraph  of  beginning,  middle,  and  end.      

Example  4:    An  example  of  a  well-­‐structured  paragraph  

The  table  on  the  next  page  sets  out  the  logical  structure  of  an  example  paragraph.    This  
is  from  the  sociology  essay  that  we  looked  at  in  Example  2  earlier  in  this  unit.    
Remember  the  way  that  the  introduction  paragraph  introduced  us  to  the  way  that  the  
essay  was  going  to  be  structured:    
 
Essay  Introduction:  
 
The  concept  of  culture  can  contribute  to  our  understanding  of  
how  social  order  is  maintained  in  a  society.    With  the  concept  
of  culture,  one  can  better  understand  that  the  behaviour  of  a  
society  is  learned.    It  can  give  insight  into  why  there  are  so  
many  different  societies  operating  in  different  ways,  or,  on  the  
other  hand,  why  societies  are  so  similar.  

The  last  part  of  this  introduction  (presented  in  bold)  prepares  us  to  find  out,  at  some  
time  in  the  essay,  about  why  societies  are  similar.    As  we  saw  on  page  4,  this  point  is  
taken  up  in  the  ninth  paragraph  in  the  essay,  which  begins  with  a  sentence  that  focuses  
our  attention  on  the  point:  

Paragraph  9  beginning:  
 
Cultural  universals,  practices  found  in  every  culture,  are  
numerous,  and  although  they  vary  throughout  different  
societies  they  help  to  explain  that  there  are  similar  behaviour  
requirements  if  a  society  is  to  exist.  
 
 
The  rest  of  paragraph  9  deals  with  this  point  by  using  different  ways  of  elaborating  on  it:  

  6  
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Paragraph  9   Function     The  Paragraph  itself  

structure  

Beginning   Developing  notion  of  why   Cultural  universals,  practices  found  in  every  
(hyper-­‐Theme)   societies  are  similar   culture,  are  numerous,  and  although  they  vary  
throughout  different  societies  they  help  to  
explain  that  there  are  similar  behaviour  
requirements  if  a  society  is  to  exist.  

Middle   Developing  the  beginning   For  example,  every  society  has  such  things  as  
by  giving  an  example   bodily  adornment,  education,  family  incest  
  taboos,  music,  religious  ritual,  trade,  language  
  and  many  more  (Robertson,  1987:72).    
   
  Hallinan  claims  that  with  a  proper  
Developing  the  beginning   understanding  of  culture,  one  can  see  that  the  
by  explaining  the  relevance   basic  behavioural  requirements  of  all  societies  
of  culture  to  understanding   are  essentially  the  same  -­‐  using  technology,  
society,  using  source   forming  co-­‐operative  relations  and  
material  to        substantiate   communicating  symbolically  through  language  
claims   (1984:77).  

End     Providing  a  rationale  for   If  culture  is  suddenly  taken  away  from  a  society  
  why  behaviour  patterns  in   then  that  society  will  undoubtedly  fall  apart.  
  societies  are  the  same,  
  using  a  speculative  
  approach  

 
The  end  of  the  paragraph  has  two  main  functions:    to  conclude  the  paragraph,  and  to  
point  forward  to  what  the  next  paragraph  might  be  about.    Paragraph  10  is  about  "why  a  
society  may  disintegrate  or  change",  and  so  it  comes  as  no  great  surprise  now  because  it  
has  already  been  suggested  at  the  end  of  paragraph  9.  
 

✪  Exercise  1  
 
Read  the  following  paragraph  and  decide  whether  it  is  well  structured  by  analysing  
whether  its  beginning  sets  out  the  structure  for  the  rest  of  the  paragraph.    Put  marks  in  
the  paragraph  to  show:    
i)     the  beginning  
ii)   the  sections  of  the  middle  
iii)   the  end  

  7  
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Over   the   past   30   years,   research   in   the   health   arena   has   attracted   psychologists,  
anthropologists   and   sociologists.     The   focus   of   psychological   research   in   this   area   is  
concerned  with  individual  motives,  attitudes  and  beliefs  in  relation  to  both  health  and  illness.    
Anthropological  studies,  however,  are  concerned  with  culture  and  health  care.    Such  studies  
concentrate   on   a   conception   of   disease   as   a   cultural   product   and   on   the   way   social   and  
cultural   life   in   the   past   affects   beliefs   about   health   and   illness.     In   sociological   studies   the  
emphasis  is  similar,  but  focussed  more  on  social  relations  within  a  particular  social  structure  
with  respect  to  medical  care.  
 

✪ ✪ You  can  now  check  the  answers  in  the  Answer  Key  at  the  back  of  the  unit.  
 

✪  Exercise  2  
Fill  in  the  gaps  in  the  following  paragraph  to  highlight  how  the  paragraph  is  structured:  

Poverty   occurs   when   requirements   for   basic   living   are   not   met.     Two   types   of   poverty   can   be  
seen  in  the  world  today,  absolute  and  relative.      _________________  is  generally  restricted  
to   the   Third   World   where   basic   life   essentials   are   lacking.     These   life   essentials   are   food,   fuel  
and   shelter.     The   existence   of     _________________is   determined   by   comparison   with   the  
normal   standard   of   living   of   a   society.     In   Australian   society,   for   example,   relative   poverty  
exists   as   shown   in   the   statistics   for   child   poverty.     Both   types   of   _____________   are  
problems  for  the  government  and  people  of  the  country.  
 
✪ ✪ You  can  now  check  the  answers  in  the  Answer  Key  at  the  back  of  the  unit.  
 

✪  Exercise  3  
 
Here  is  a  paragraph  from  a  student's  essay  in  economics.    However,  the  paragraph  
beginning  has  been  omitted.    Read  the  paragraph  carefully,  and  then  write  a  suitable  
beginning  to  the  paragraph.  

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The  first  GDP  measurement  is  the  'income  received  method',  whereby  the  income  received  
by  the  owners  of  productive  resources  is  found  by  adding  the  wages,  rent,  interest  and  profit  
earned   at   each   stage   of   production.     The   second   means   of   measurement,   'the   production  
method'  can  be  found  using  either  the  'final  product'  or  the  'value  added',  thus  providing  a  
figure   for   'value   of   production'.     The   third   measurement,   the   'expenditure   method'   simply  
measures  the  amount  spent  buying  finished  goods.  
 
✪ ✪ You  can  now  check  the  answers  in  the  Answer  Key  at  the  back  of  the  unit.  
 

  8  
Cohesive  Writing  Module:  Unit  1.  Independent  Learning  Resources    
©  Learning  Centre  University  of  Sydney.  This  Unit  may  be  copied  for  individual  student  use.    

✪  Exercise  4  
 
The  following  text  is  a  piece  of  student  writing  commenting  on  the  political  system  of  
Pakistan.    It  is  divided  into  seven  sentences  but  they  are  in  the  wrong  order.    Read  the  
sentences  thoroughly  to  determine  which  one  is  the  hyper-­‐Theme  and  then  which  order  
the  remaining  sentences  should  be  in.    Then  rewrite  the  paragraph  below,  and  check  it  
carefully  to  make  sure  it  has  a  logical  structure  before  you  check  with  the  original  in  the  
answer  key.  

a)   Another  reason  has  been  the  lack  of  strong  political  parties.  
 
b)   While   it   is   necessary   to   recognise   that   these   are   not   the   only   factors   determining   the  
failure  of  a  democratic  system  they  stand  as  the  most  prominent  reasons.  
 
c)   The   first   is   that   none   of   the   leaders   of   the   government,   which   has   been   based   on   a  
Western   democratic   constitutional   system,   has   attempted   to   rule   the   country   in   a  
democratic  way.  
 
d)   It   can   be   argued   that   a   Western   political   system   has   failed   in   Pakistan   for   two   major  
reasons.  
 
 e)   Instead,  they  have  instituted  autocratic  rule.  
 
f)   General  Mirza  (1980:19)  claimed  that  "Pakistan's  illiterate  people  are  neither  interested  
nor  competent  in  politics".  
 
g)   As  a  result,  when  constitutional  crises  have  arisen  there  has  not  been  sufficient  popular  
support  behind  any  one  party  to  overcome  the  situation.    

✪ ✪ You  can  now  check  the  answers  in  the  Answer  Key  at  the  back  of  the  unit.  

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
   

  9  
Cohesive  Writing  Module:  Unit  1.  Independent  Learning  Resources    
©  Learning  Centre  University  of  Sydney.  This  Unit  may  be  copied  for  individual  student  use.    

Unit  1:  Answer  Key  to  Exercises  

✪ ✪ Exercise  1:  Answer  

Hyper-­‐Theme  (paragraph  Introduction)  

Over  the  past  30  years,  research  in  the  health  arena  has  attracted  psychologists,  anthropologists  and  
sociologists.  (three  groups)      
 
Paragraph  middle  (first  group)  
The  focus  of  psychological  research  in  this  area  is  concerned  with  individual  motives,  attitudes  and  
beliefs  in  relation  to  both  health  and  illness.      
 
Paragraph  middle  (second  group)    
Anthropological   studies,   however,   are   concerned   with   culture   and   health   care.   Such   studies  
concentrate  on  a  conception  of  disease  as  a  cultural  product  and  on  the  way  social  and  cultural  life  in  
the  past  affects  beliefs  about  health  and  illness.  
 
Paragraph  middle  (third  group)    
In   sociological   studies   the   emphasis   is   similar,   but   focussed   more   on   social   relations   within   a  
particular  social  structure  with  respect  to  medical  care.  
 
This  is  a  well-­‐structured  paragraph  with  very  clear  "theme"  patterns.    However,  this  
analysis  shows  that  this  particular  paragraph  doesn't  have  an  "end"  section,  perhaps  
because  the  next  paragraph  which  follows  may  pick  up  these  three  groups,  and  so  there  
is  nothing  to  say  to  end  it  yet.  
 

✪ ✪ Exercise  2:  Answer  

Poverty  occurs  when  requirements  for  basic  living  are  not  met.  Two  types  of  poverty  can  be  seen  in  
the  world  today,  absolute  and  relative.    Absolute   poverty  is  generally  restricted  to  the  Third  World  
where   basic   life   essentials   are   lacking.     These   life   essentials   are   food,   fuel   and   shelter.     The   existence  
of  relative  poverty  is  determined  by  comparison  with  the  normal  standard  of  living  of  a  society.    In  
Australian   society,   for   example,   relative   poverty   exists   as   shown   in   the   statistics   for   child   poverty.    
Both  types  of  poverty  are  problems  for  the  government  and  people  of  the  country.  
 

✪ ✪ Exercise  3:  Answer  

The  original  beginning  to  this  paragraph  is  shown  in  bold:  
 
Gross   Domestic   Product   (GDP)   is   measured   in   three   ways.     The   first   GDP   measurement   is   the  
'income   received   method',   whereby   the   income   received   by   the   owners   of   productive   resources   is  
found  by  adding  the  wages,  rent,  interest  and  profit  earned  at  each  stage  of  production.    The  second  
means   of   measurement,   'the   production   method'   can   be   found   using   either   the   'final   product'   or   the  
'value   added',   thus   providing   a   figure   for   'value   of   production'.     The   third   measurement,   the  
'expenditure  method'  simply  measures  the  amount  spent  buying  finished  goods.  

  10  
Cohesive  Writing  Module:  Unit  1.  Independent  Learning  Resources    
©  Learning  Centre  University  of  Sydney.  This  Unit  may  be  copied  for  individual  student  use.    

✪ ✪ Exercise  4:  Answer  

The  original  sequence  for  these  sentences  was:  

 
d)   It  can  be  argued  that  a  Westerm  political  system  has  failed  in  Pakistan  for  two  major  reasons.  
c)   The  first  is  that  none  of  the  leaders  of  the  government,  which  has  been  based  on  a  Western  
democratic  constitutional  system,  has  attempted  to  rule  the  country  in  a  democratic  way.  
e)   Instead,  they  have  instituted  autocratic  rule.  
a)   Another  reason  has  been  the  lack  of  strong  political  parties.  
g)   As   a   result,   when   constitutional   crises   have   arisen   there   has   not   been   sufficient   popular  
support  behind  any  one  party  to  overcome  the  situation.    
f)   General   Mirza   (1980:19)   claims   that   "Pakistan's   illiterate   people   are   neither   interested   nor  
competent  in  politics".  
b)   While   it   is   necessary   to   recognise   that   these   are   not   the   only   factors   determining   the   failure   of  
a  democratic  system  they  stand  as  the  most  prominent  reasons.  
 

  11