1

LIBRETTO

Welcome to
THE ROCK

A bodhran beats a fast rhythm.

CLAUDE
On the northeast tip of North America, on an island called Newfoundland,
there’s an airport
—it used to be one of the biggest airports in the world. And next to it, is a
town called
Gander.
OZ
There’s a two-person police department.
BEULAH
An elementary school.
BONNIE
An SPCA.
JANICE
A local TV station.
DOUG
And a hockey rink.
CLAUDE
It’s a small place—on a giant rock in the ocean. Everybody knows everybody
else. And
everybody in this room has a story about how they started that day.
WELCOME TO THE ROCK! IF YOU COME FROM AWAY 1
YOU’LL PROBABLY UNDERSTAND ABOUT A HALF OF
WHAT WE SAY
THEY SAY NO MAN’S AN ISLAND, BUT AN ISLAND MAKES
A MAN
1 IRENE: This was the first song written. David sent it to me, saying
he was worried
it wasn’t quite right. But I listened to it and as soon as I heard the
beat at the
beginning I knew it was—and by the end of the song I was in love
with it. It was
almost scrapped altogether at one point, but it is essentially the
same song from our
first writing session.
CLAUDE, OZ, BEULAH & BONNIE
SPECIALLY WHEN ONE COMES FROM ONE LIKE
NEWFOUNDLAND
ALL
WELCOME TO THE ROCK
BEULAH
 2

That morning, I’m in the classroom. It’s our first day back and the school
buses are on
strike, so I’m covering for Annette, who’s running late!
ANNETTE
Sorry, Beulah! How’s the kids?
BEULAH
Not exactly thrilled to be inside on such a gorgeous day, so I told them we’d
only have a half
day this morning—and they were quite pleased—until I told them we’d have
the other half in
the afternoon.
GARTH
WELCOME TO THE WILDEST WEATHER THAT YOU’VE EVER
HEARD OF
DOUG
WHERE EVERYONE IS NICER, BUT IT’S NEVER NICE ABOVE
ANNETTE
WELCOME TO THE FARTHEST PLACE YOU’LL GET FROM
DISNEYLAND
CLAUDE
FISH AND CHIPS AND SHIPWRECKS
CLAUDE & WOMEN
THIS IS NEWFOUNDLAND
MEN
WELCOME TO THE ROCK
WOMEN
I’M AN ISLANDER
ALL
I AM AN ISLANDER 2
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
OZ
That morning I’m in my car. The kids cross Airport Boulevard to get to school
—and that
time a day people are in a little bit of a rush to get to work and stuff, so
normally I sit there
and run my radar.
2 DAVID: “Welcome to the Rock” and its “I’m An Islander” chorus in
particular was
inspired by Newfoundland pride songs, most especially Bruce
Moss’s “The
Islander.” I wanted to write a song that welcomed people to the
world, telling the
audience immediately that this show wasn’t set in New York, and
also sharing the
 3

unique mix of pride and humility that Newfoundlanders have about

their home.
Oz cues the cast to make a “WHOOP WHOOP” noise together. 3
3 IRENE: All the sound effects are made by the cast, including
sirens, cats, dogs,
and Bonobo chimpanzees. We joke that having our cast make all the
noises is not
only theatrical, but inspired by a certain budget-conscious Canadian
aesthetic.
And if they’re speeding, I’ll stop ’em and write out a warning ticket. I’ll write
“STFD”—Slow
The Fuck Down. 4
4 DAVID: STFD tickets from Oz have become prized possessions, so
much so that
some people speed through town in the hopes of getting one.
MARGIE
WELCOME TO THE LAND WHERE THE WINTERS TRIED TO
KILL US
AND WE SAID
ALL (EXCEPT DWIGHT)
WE WILL NOT BE KILLED
DWIGHT
WELCOME TO THE LAND WHERE THE WATERS TRIED TO
DROWN US
AND WE SAID

“You are here at the start of a moment.”

ALL (EXCEPT JANICE)

WE WILL NOT BE DROWNED
JANICE
WELCOME TO THE LAND WHERE WE LOST OUR LOVED ONES
AND WE SAID
ALL (EXCEPT 10) 5
WE WILL STILL GO ON
5 IRENE: Each actor has been assigned a number, which refers to
any characters
who are unnamed. For example, actor 10 refers to the actor who
plays Bob and
others, but the cast doesn’t let them just be numbers—each
character has been
imbued with their own backstory and details.
10 (LOCAL)
WELCOME TO THE LAND WHERE THE WINDS TRIED TO
BLOW
ALL
 4

AND WE SAID NO
BONNIE
That morning, I drop my kids off at school and head to the SPCA 6 , where
I’m greeted by
my other kids—all barking and meowing for breakfast and a belly rub. Not
that I’m
complaining. I loves ’em. But by the time feeding is done, I’ve got to get
back to pick up my
human kids. So, I take just one second for myself. And I’m sitting in my car.
6 IRENE: I used to volunteer at an animal rescue—and I would scoop
litter as I
listened to the interviews over and over, immersing myself in who
these people were.
Their voices were in our heads every step of the way, so when we
returned three
years later and acted like they were long lost friends, we had to
remind ourselves,
OH! They are a little taken aback. The interviews were a long time
ago, and they
haven’t thought of us every single day the way we’ve thought of
them.
BEULAH
I’m in the staffroom.
ANNETTE
I’m in the library.
BONNIE, BEULAH & ANNETTE
And I turn on the radio.
ALL (EXCEPT BONNIE, BEULAH & ANNETTE)
YOU ARE HERE
AT THE START OF A MOMENT
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE WORLD
WHERE THE RIVER MEETS THE SEA
HERE—ON THE EDGE OF THE ATLANTIC
ON AN ISLAND IN BETWEEN
THERE AND HERE
ALL (EXCEPT BONNIE & OZ)
(repeated hushed underneath)
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER…
OZ
I’m running my radar when Bonnie comes by. She pulls up and she’s wavin’
at me like mad,
so I roll down my window and she says…
BONNIE
Oz, turn on the radio!
 5

OZ
Slow it down, Bonnie.
BONNIE
Jesus H., Oz! Turn on your radio!
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE)
WHERE OUR STORIES START
JANICE
It’s my first day at the station.
ALL (EXCEPT GARTH)
WHERE WE’LL END THE NIGHT
GARTH
I’m getting coffee for the picket line.
ALL (EXCEPT CRYSTAL)
WHERE WE KNOW BY HEART
CRYSTAL
Five minutes ’til my smoke break.
ALL (EXCEPT DWIGHT)
EVERY SINGLE FLIGHT
DWIGHT
I’m off to work at the airport.
MEN
WELCOME TO THE FOG
WELCOME TO THE TREES
TO THE OCEAN—AND THE SKY
AND WHATEVER’S IN BETWEEN
TO THE ONES WHO’VE LEFT
YOU’RE NEVER TRULY GONE
A CANDLE’S IN THE WINDOW
AND THE KETTLE’S ALWAYS ON
ALL
WHEN THE SUN IS COMING UP
AND THE WORLD HAS COME ASHORE
IF YOU’RE HOPING FOR A HARBOR
THEN YOU’LL FIND AN OPEN DOOR
IN THE WINTER FROM THE WATER
THROUGH WHATEVER’S IN THE WAY
TO THE ONES WHO HAVE COME FROM AWAY
WELCOME TO THE ROCK!

CUT
From Away7

7 DAVID: At La Jolla, we were encouraged to write a new opening

number. From the
very beginning, Irene hated it, but we kept trying to make it work.
Ian and August
 6

arranged and orchestrated it. Kelly choreographed it. The cast

learned it and Howell
lit it. But somehow with the best of intentions on everyone’s part, it
somehow came
off resembling a theme park show. We sat at the back of the theatre
gritting our
teeth, but not knowing what to do. Ian even eventually came over to
our side after
his wife Anne heard we were changing the opening and told him it
was a huge
mistake.
Throughout the script there will be sections written in blue italics
representing
selections of the script that did not make to Broadway. For example,
here are some
of the original lyrics from the end of Welcome to Newfoundland and
the Finale:

WELCOME TO THE COD AND TO THE TREES

AND TO THE FOG AND TO THE FERRIES
AND THE BERRIES AND THE FAILING FISHERIES
AND TO THE KITCHEN PARTIES
TO THE ONES DEPARTED IN OUR HEARTS
WE KNOW YOU’LL NEVER LEAVE THIS
LITTLE BIT OF HEAVEN WHERE WE STARTED
TO THE DOWN AND THE OUT OF TOWN ON QUADS
AND THANKS TO GOD WE ARE THE POOREST
BUT THE RICHEST WHERE IT COUNTS
AND TO THE ST. JOHN’S GIRLS
WITH THEIR SAILS UNFURLED
TO OUR FRIENDS AT THE ENDS OF THE WORLD, WE SAY
WELCOME TO THE NEAR AND TO THE DEAR
AND TO THE HEAR AND NOW
TO QUIDI VIDI, HERE’S TO BEER,
TO ’EARING ’OW’S DAT NOW?
TO THE PASSENGERS WHO CAME FROM THERE
BUT THEN BECAME OUR FRIENDS
BETWEEN ARRIVAL AND DEPARTURE
AND ARRIVAL ONCE AGAIN
AND HERE’S TO 28 HOURS ON 38 PLANES
5 DAYS, 19 ANIMALS AND 7,000 STRAYS
TO THE KINDNESS OF STRANGERS
IN THE DARKEST OF DAYS
TO OUR FRIENDS WHO HAVE COME FROM AWAY, WE SAY
WELCOME TO THE ROCK!
 7

At one point, I asked Ian why it had been arranged in a major key,
which I thought
would kill it. He responded, “… do you want to kill it?” And we did,
so we kept it in
the major key – but it was still going ahead! Even the cast chimed in
about it, politely
encouraging us to revert to the original. Up to this point, we’d
responded to notes
speaking “in Canadian” – politely hoping not to offend anyone. So
when Chris
suggested that since we’d completely staged it, we should put the
song into the
show that night – Irene finally said, “No! I don’t want it in our
show.” And just like
that it was cut and we’d learned to “speak American.”

EVERYTHING STARTS AND ENDS

at Tim Hortons

CLAUDE
I starts my day at Tim Hortons. Don’t drink coffee. Don’t drink tea. And I’ve
no use for
donuts. But I’ll grab a Pepsi and get a lay of the land. As the mayor, it’s how I
keep in touch
with the people and such. Everything starts and ends at Tim Hortons. 8
8 DAVID: They’re on every corner in Canada, but Tim Hortons and
Shoppers don’t
often end up in Broadway musicals (though there is one on the
backdrop of The
Book of Mormon!). Canadians aren’t used to being represented
onstage, so you can
always tell when they’re in the audience because they laugh here.
Claude enters Tim Hortons.
Morning, Garth.
GARTH
Morning, Claude.
CLAUDE
Morning, Crystal.
CRYSTAL
Morning, Mr. Mayor. 9
9 DAVID: Crystal is named after the very first person we
interviewed, Crystal
Flikkema-Kane. We’d found her online, and at the end of our
interview she asked
where we were staying in Newfoundland. We said we weren’t sure
yet, so she told us
 8

her parents would let us use their house. And they did (we named
other characters,
Matty and Brenda, after them).
CLAUDE
Dwight.
DWIGHT
Morning, Claude. Garth. Crystal.
DOUG
Claude. Crystal. Dwight. Garth. Morning. 10
10 IRENE: In Gander, David went to a public restroom. Every man
who entered was
greeted by name by every other man. They literally all knew each
other— and David
felt left out. So, he wrote this scene.
CRYSTAL
Morning, b’ys. Pepsi? 11
11 IRENE: Years later, we found out there’s an actual woman named
Crystal who
works at Tim Hortons, and Sharon Wheatley got to work behind the
counter with
her.
CLAUDE
That’s right, Crystal. What’s the news?
DWIGHT
School bus strike still on?
CLAUDE
Ahya. We’re working it out.
GARTH
Well, we’re coming to the table.
CLAUDE
Well, we’re coming to the table too.
DWIGHT
Are they tearing down the airport?
CLAUDE
Not today.
DOUG
I heard Don Burton and his wife won the Super 7!
CLAUDE
You don’t say.
DWIGHT
Lucky shit.
DOUG
4.6 million.
They all whistle. Janice enters.
JANICE
Excuse me, I’m looking for the mayor.
 9

Everyone points at Claude.

Mr. Mayor—I’m Janice Mosher with Rogers TV. I’m new. To town—and new to
reporting.
It’s my first day.
CLAUDE
Where you longs to, Janice? 12
12 DAVID: Newfoundland has a million different wonderful phrases,
which we
peppered in where we could, though many got cut because they
were unintelligible
to audiences.
JANICE
Port Aux Basque. So if you see me running red lights or anything, just forgive
me because
we don’t have stop lights over there.
CLAUDE
Well, welcome to Gander, Janice.
DWIGHT
Janice.
GARTH
Janice.
DOUG
Janice.
CRYSTAL
Janice.
CLAUDE
If you’re looking for news, you should talk to that man running in here. That’s
our constable,
Oz Fudge. He’s full of stories.
Oz runs in.
OZ
Mister Mayor, I saw your car in the lot. Crystal, turn up the radio so’s we all
can hear.
Doug, you probably want to get down to air traffic control right away.
DOUG
There’s only supposed to be two air traffic controllers on, but instead there’s
fourteen.…
Everyone’s heard and they all shows up without even being asked. We’re told
there’ll be
over two hundred planes getting diverted across the country.
Everyone becomes air traffic controllers as the bodhran starts beating
slowly.
DOUG
Lufthansa four one four, this is Gander Centre—squawk code seven two tree
five. Due to a
 10

recent development, you are ordered to land at Gander YQX immediately.

Copy that. This
is an order. 13
13 DAVID: There’s always slight tension between pilots and air
traffic controllers
around who’s in control. Beverley told us that September 11 was
the first time she
ever heard them use the word “order.”
12/10
(CONTROL)
Roger Lufthansa four one four. Turn right heading one niner zero degrees. You
are cleared
to flight level two four zero. Speedbird one one seven—squawk code two tree
five. This is
Gander Centre. You’re radar identified—now cleared to Gander YQX via
present position
direct.
8/7
(CONTROL)
Alitalia six four four, reduce speed to one zero five. You are ordered to land
your aircraft at
Gander YQX immediately. American airspace has been closed. you are
cleared to six
thousand feet Gander altimeter tree zero zero one. Roger one one tree.
Cleared flight level
two four zero.
9/2/1
(CONTROL)
Sabena five tree niner, Gander—winds two one zero degrees five knots. You
are cleared to
land runway two two. Thank you five tree niner, vector for runway two two.
Turn left
heading two five zero to Intercept the localizer. Cleared straight in back-
course runway two
two.
11/4
(CONTROL)
Delta one five—Gander Centre—I show you on the localizer eight miles final.
Contact tower
now on frequency one one eight decimal one. Thank you one five. Air New
Zealand eight
five two, squawk code seven two tree five. This is Gander Centre.
5/6
(CONTROL)
Aer Lingus one oh five, the U.S. airspace has been closed. You are ordered to
land at Deer
 11

Lake YDX or Gander YQX. Roger two two seven. Turn left heading one five
zero degrees
and proceed.
After five seconds, Actor 9, 10, and Doug continue. All others continue
underneath.
CONTROL 9
No, sir. You do not have a choice.
CONTROL 10
No, sir. This is not a drill.
DOUG
Yes, sir. I understand you have VIPs onboard. I’ll see your VIPs and raise you
an
international emergency. Land your plane now. 14
14 DAVID: The Gander Air Museum has a mocked-up recording of the
air traffic
controllers and the pilots, which we recorded and used as reference
for this section.
Beverley Bass also helped us with aviation lingo.
Everyone becomes pilots. The bodhran builds in intensity.

BEVERLEY
Copy that, Gander Tower.
PILOT 5
This is Air France.
PILOT 1
Aer Lingus
PILOT 9
Lufthanza
PILOT 8
British Airways
PILOT 7
Emirates
BEVERLEY
This is American four niner. What am I supposed to tell my passengers?
PILOT 10
Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. There’s been an
incident in the United
States.
PILOT 7
We’re having trouble with the… cabin lighting system. We’re just going to
touch down while
we fix the system. 15
15 DAVID: One of the challenges of this section was representing
that many
passengers had very different experiences depending on which
plane they were on.
 12

In those early hours, pilots didn’t know who might be on their plane
and some chose
to limit how much of the news they shared.
PILOT 2
Meine Damen und Herren, hier ist Ihre Pilotin. Aufgrund eines terroristischen
Vorfalls in den
Vereinigten Staaten müssen wir in Kanada landen.
PILOTS 10/8
This is your pilot speaking. We’ll be making an unexpected detour. The U.S.
airspace is
closed and we are being diverted. I will provide more details as they become
available.
PILOTS 1/6/11
Ladies and Gentlemen: Can I have your attention? We’ve received word that
there has
been an incident in the U.S. that will require us to make an unscheduled stop
in Gander,
Newfoundland.
PILOTS 4/5/12
Mesdames et messieurs, nous allons faire un court arrêt à Gander, Terre-
Neuve pour faire
le plein d’essence. Merci beaucoup pour votre compréhension.
PILOTS 9/7
Damas y caballeros, por favor regresen a sus asientos y abróchense sus
cinturones.
Vamos a aterrizar en Terranova.
The cast makes a flight attendant button “BOONG-BOONG” noise, as
everyone becomes
passengers, facing sideways
FLIGHT ATTENDANT 16
Ladies and Gentlemen, please fasten your seat belts. Looks like we’ll be
making an
unexpected landing in Gander, (mispronouncing it) Newfoundland. 17
16 IRENE: The minute we landed in Gander, we started interviewing
people—the first
person was our hilarious flight attendant, Dale.
17 IRENE: This is the only place where Newfoundland is
mispronounced in the show,
but just to be clear, the stress is on “land,” like “Understand
Newfoundland.”
The passengers start murmuring restlessly. The flight attendant turns to the
audience, and
the passengers freeze.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT (CONT’D)
Anybody in the business knows when you set down in Gander, it’s for an
emergency. Now,
 13

we don’t know what’s going on, but the captain tells us to keep everyone
from panicking.
The flight attendant turns back, as the passengers unfreeze.
Tray tables up, please. We will be dimming the lights in the cabin. Pushing
the light-bulb
button will turn your reading light on; however, pushing the flight-attendant
button will not
turn your flight attendant on. 18
18 DAVID: The flight attendants are probably the most fun part of
the audition
process. Chris often has actresses try them in a wide variety of
styles and accents
from Russian spies to Texas cheerleaders, seeing how willing to play
each actress
is.
One of the passengers, Diane, turns toward her window.
DIANE
I look out the window to see if there’s something mechanical—like if we’ve
lost an engine or
if something’s on fire. But I don’t see anything.
Another passenger, Nick, turns toward his window.
NICK
I told head office I need to travel less—I told them it was doctor’s orders. But
they say,
“You’re going to the conference,” so you go.
Bob turns toward his window.
BOB
My dad is always saying, Bob, you’ve got to calm down. But the flight
attendant is shaking
like a leaf, so I figure I’ve got permission.
Hannah turns toward her window.
HANNAH
My son sends me on this vacation—he says, “Mom, you’ve never gone
anywhere.” And
when I get back, I’m telling him—this is exactly why.
Kevin T turns toward his window.
KEVIN T
Suddenly, there’s a drop.
The group drops, with a gasp.
A sudden change in direction. And I fly a lot, so I know that’s not normal.
Outside the
window, all I can see below are trees and rocks and… nothing.

“It looks like everybody in Newfoundland is

here.”
 14

38 PLANES
BEVERLEY
On final approach, we’re coming into runway two-two, and I think, "Where
am I going to
park this thing?" There are planes lined up like sardines. And as far as I can
see there’s
cars lined up too. It looks like everybody in Newfoundland is here.
The townspeople stand looking upward.
ALL UNLESS SPEAKING
(one at a time, then building together)
ONE PLANE THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN
THIRTEEN PLANES THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN
NINETEEN PLANES THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN
TWENTY-SIX PLANES
THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN
TWENTY-NINE PLANES
THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN
THIRTY-TWO PLANES
THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN ANOTHER
AND THEN
THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT
THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT
THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT
PLANES 19
19 DAVID: Verbatim text informed so much of the script, including
the refrain of “One
plane then another and then another.” The vocals in this section
build in intensity,
 15

representing the noise of so many planes landing at once, so Janice,

Bonnie, and Oz
have to almost yell overtop of them.
JANICE (to the cameraman)
Is this on? Sorry. I’m new (she turns to the camera). This is Rogers TV
Channel 9. My
name is Janice Mosher and I’m reporting live from Gander Airport where the
nineteenth
plane has just touched down. I’m here with…
BONNIE
Bonnie Harris. On a normal day, we get a half dozen flights, and now we’ve
already got
three times that many landing in two hours. It’s a lot of noise. You can smell
the fuel. You
can smell the exhaust.
OZ
Jaysus, that’s a jumbo! There’s gotta be two-fifty or three hundred on her.
That’s a fairly
large one, there’s gotta be two hundred on her—now, I’m adding this up. We
got 38 planes
—we got two, three hundred people on the average…
OZ
Holy shit!
At town hall, everyone becomes staff members who shout for Claude as he
enters, trailed
by Janice.
STAFF 1/GARTH
Claude! Claude?
JANICE/DOUG
Excuse me. Mr. Mayor?
STAFF 2/6
Claude! The phones are ringing off the hook.
STAFF 4/DWIGHT
Mr. Mayor! I need to talk to you
STAFF 5/10
Claude! I just heard from Ottawa.
Claude whistles for attention and points to STAFF 10
STAFF 10
Air traffic control says five of the planes on the ground aren’t responding.
DWIGHT
Reg says they’re probably just on the wrong frequency.
CLAUDE
Thank you, Dwight.
DOUG
FAA won’t give us a time line for reopening the airspace.
DWIGHT
 16

And the airplane crews need to be rested or we’ll never get them out of here.
OZ
American Trans Air flight number twenty-five is requesting when they
deplane— 20
20 DAVID: You may note that the flight list on pg. 38 doesn’t include
ATA flight 25, but
this is what was recorded in the emergency minutes (the next day
they corrected it
to ATA 8733 – which did exist, but was headed to Manchester. The
only plane to
Orlando was Virgin Atlantic 75). Reading through these minutes,
you can see just
how much information town hall was trying to process. As they
wrote at 8:20 pm on
9/13, “It should be noted that a tremendous amount of
misinformation is out there
and Town Emergency Operations Centre becomes inefficient and
ineffective if it has
to deal with this.”
DOUG
If they deplane—
OZ
That they be a priority…
CLAUDE
Why?
OZ
They were headed to Disney World with ninety Wish Kids.
Some of the staff react.
CLAUDE
Oh, Jaysus.
STAFF 6
Even with all the hotels in town, we’ve got no room—we gotta start looking
at other towns.
STAFF 5
Appleton and Gambo have already offered—but we can’t get them there.
STAFF 1
(pointing at Garth)
Garth’s bus drivers are still on the picket line—and without them no one’s
going anywhere.
CLAUDE
Oh for Jaysus’ sake, I’ll tell them where to go. (to Janice) Don’t quote me on
that.
STAFF 2
(covering the phone)
I’ve got the SPCA lady on the line again asking about animals–
CLAUDE
 17

Tell Bonnie we’ve got people to deal with.

STAFF 4
(hanging up the phone)
Claude! Apparently those five planes that aren’t responding? They’re treating
them as bomb
threats!
Everyone begins to panic.
STAFF 1
How many ARE we getting?
OZ
Why were they even sent here? Why not Toronto?
STAFF 2
What are we supposed to do?
GARTH
Why are we getting the bomb threats?
STAFF 4
They don’t know what’s on them! Or who’s on them!
DWIGHT
My kids are watching those planes!
STAFF 5
Bomb threats! What do they mean bomb threats?
STAFF 10
Half the town’s gone down to watch!
STAFF 6
Do we evacuate the town? What do we do?
DOUG
Oh no. Donny’s down there. He just headed down there!
CLAUDE
Alright! The RCMP is gonna handle it. But we’ve got almost seven thousand
people who
might be spending the night. Jaysus, that’s near as many as we got living
here in town. We
need to house them somewhere and we need to get them there–
GARTH
Don’t look at me!
CLAUDE
… Not to mention food and supplies and anything else that snarls up.
DOUG
Well, why are they sending them here? Why not Toronto or Ottawa?
Everyone reacts. Claude looks at them.
CLAUDE
Because if anything goes wrong, we have a lot less people to lose.
A slight pause as they all take that in.
Alright, Janice Mosher. Here’s your news. Gander town council declares a
state of
emergency.
 18

JANICE (on camera)

11:53 a.m.
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE)
Tuesday.
JANICE
September 11, 2001. Any available community buildings will be converted
into shelters. With
thousands of passengers arriving at any minute, the town is asking for help
with—well,
anything you can do…
BEULAH
CRYSTAL, I SAW ON THE NEWS
THAT THEY’RE LOOKING FOR
BLANKETS AND BEDDING
AND MAYBE SOME FOOD
CRYSTAL
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY NEED
AND HOW MUCH
MARTHA
I NEED SOMETHING TO DO
MARTHA, CRYSTAL & BEULAH
’CAUSE I CAN’T WATCH THE NEWS ANYMORE
ANNETTE
CAN I HELP?
IS THERE SOMETHING?
I NEED TO DO SOMETHING
TO KEEP ME FROM THINKING OF
ALL OF THOSE SCENES ON THE TUBE
CRYSTAL
I NEED SOMETHING TO DO
CAUSE I CAN’T WATCH THE NEWS
MARGIE & ANNETTE
NO, I CAN’T WATCH THE NEWS ANYMORE
CRYSTAL, JANICE, BEULAH & MARTHA
IN THE WINTER, FROM THE WATER, THROUGH THE WIND
ALL WOMEN
IF A STRANGER ENDS UP AT YOUR DOOR
BEULAH
YOU GET ON THE HORN 21
21 IRENE: this song was partially inspired by “Telephone Hour” from
Bye Bye Birdie
(where the name Margie also coincidentally came from).
BEULAH (on the phone)
Hello? This is Beulah Davis down at the Academy. 22
I heard we might be getting some guests and I thought I’d see if I could help
whosever in
 19

charge of getting the school organized—How many passengers can we take?

Uh—well, we
fit about 400 students—yes, we could probably do six hundred. Or sure,
seven hundred, if
we really pack them in. When are they coming? Could be any time now?
Well, I’m glad I
phoned!
22 DAVID: One of our first interviews was with Diane, Annette,
Maureen, and Diane—
the teachers at Gander Academy—and Wayne, the vice principal at
the time. They
gave us so many details that we couldn’t write fast enough, and we
had to frantically
figure out how to record on our phones. They spoke to us for hours,
each
overlapping with a million stories. Transcribing it later, it was a
challenge to pick out
who said what, so they are all represented in the characters of
Beulah and Annette.
OZ
I get a call from Beulah looking for “anything seven hundred people from
around the world
might need.” So, I go down to Shoppers and the manager says to just take
what I want off
the shelves—toothbrushes, floss, mouthwash, deodorant. And I’m back at
the school, when
Beulah says…
BEULAH
You know, those planes probably got some babies on ’em…
A slight pause.
OZ
So, I’m back to Shoppers for diapers. And we’re unpacking them, when
Annette says…
ANNETTE
You know, those babies are probably going to be hungry…
Another pause.
OZ
So, I’m back to Shoppers for formula and baby food. And when I get back,
Beulah says…
BEULAH
You know, those planes are probably filled with women of child-bearing age…
Another pause.
OZ
Sooo?
BEULAH
 20

So, I’m back to Shoppers to pick up as many pads and tampons as they
have. 23
23 IRENE: In one of our interviews, a woman waited until her
husband took David to
see something, then once she and I were alone, she finally felt
comfortable to talk
about how they arranged pads and tampons for the passengers.
OZ exits, wincing.
JANICE 24
24 DAVID: This scene is a good representation of the improv
tradition of yelling “cut
to” in the middle of a scene, to show something that was just
referenced. For
example, “cut to” Dwight at home with the children. Though,
eventually, it just
became “cut.”
Excuse me—I’m Janice Mosher. . .—
ANNETTE
Beulah over there’s sorting clothes by sizes. Why don’t you give her a hand?
JANICE
No—I’m with Rogers—for an interview. Uh… so where’s all the food and
supplies coming
from?
ANNETTE
Well, every town within two hours of here is dropping stuff off. And we’ve
been to
Shoppers too many times to count.
JANICE
I heard the government’s bringing in some shipments as well.
ANNETTE
Well, we’ll all grow old waiting for Ottawa. But don’t think all this preparation
isn’t for us
too—if I don’t keep at it, I’d be home explaining what’s happening to my
children. This
way, my husband’s gotta do it.
At her house, Annette’s husband, Dwight, is with the children.
DWIGHT
No, your mom’s helping down at the school. NO, there’s nothing good on
television today!
Who wants more ice cream!
CHILDREN
No!
DWIGHT
No? Do you want to play horsey?
CHILDREN
No!!
 21

DWIGHT
No?… Do you want to play Kick Dad?
CHILDREN
Yeah!
A pause.
DWIGHT (resigned)
… Let’s play Kick Dad.
CHILDREN
YEAH!!
JANICE (on camera)
The Baptist Church needs a hand moving their pews… Dr. O’Brien down at
the pharmacy is
ready to fill any prescriptions. 25 Oh, and the Lions Club is looking for some
toilet paper, if
you have any extra.
25 DAVID: Kevin O’Brien and the few pharmacists in town worked
five days straight
phoning pharmacies around the world, trying to translate
prescriptions, dosages,
and drug names. This was originally multiple scenes, and even
though this storyline
was cut, it was important for us to keep the detail in.
The women begin packing and stacking boxes.
ANNETTE
MEDICINE
MARGIE
TOOTHPASTE
MARTHA
UNDERWEAR
BEULAH
ASPIRIN
CRYSTAL & ANNETTE
JACKETS OUR KIDS GREW OUT OF LAST SUMMER
JANICE
AND DOWN AT THE STATION, WE’RE TAKING DONATIONS
OUT BY THE DOOR
ALL WOMEN (EXCEPT JANICE)
HOLY JESUS, THERE’S MORE!
ANNETTE
IT’S BETTER THAN BEING AT HOME ALONE
WONDERING WHAT’S REALLY HAPPENINGMARGIE
EVERYONE’S PHONING
ANNETTE & BEULAH
WE’RE SETTING UP ROOMS IN THE SCHOOLS
MARGIE
BEEN CRYING ALL AFTERNOON WONDERING
 22

WHAT CAN BE DONE

The men enter carrying boxes across the stage.
MEN
WHAT DO WE NEED?
ANNETTE
I made a tray of sandwiches. 26
26 DAVID: When we interviewed the teachers at Gander Academy,
they spoke about
the vast amount of supplies that needed to be collected and how
the community
came together. The local dentist brought in toothbrushes and
toothpaste. Every
store in town was open twenty-four hours. And blankets and
bedding came in from
Ladle Cove, Aspen Cove, Twillingate, and Wesleyville—towns that
were two hours
away.
BEULAH
We need fifty more.
ANNETTE
Sandwiches?
BEULAH
Trays!
MEN
WHAT DO WE NEED?
DWIGHT
Two hundred gym mats! Is that enough?
BEULAH
You tell me and we’ll both know.
MEN
WHAT DO WE NEED?
JANICE (on camera)
For the love of God, stop bringing toilet paper to the Lions Club!
DWIGHT, 10 & DOUG
HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED
WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW HOW MANY YOU’RE NEEDINGTO FEED
OZ, GARTH & CLAUDE
WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW HOW MANY ARE STAYING
DWIGHT, 10 & DOUG
HOW LONG THEY ARE STAYING—
ALL MEN
WE BETTER START PRAYING THE WEATHER STAYS NICE
MARGIE, JANICE & ANNETTE
IN THE WINTER, FROM THE WATER, THROUGH THE WIND
IN THE WINTER, FROM THE WATER, THROUGH THE WIND
IF A STRANGER ENDS UP
 23

SENT BY FATE
CRYSTAL, BEULAH & BONNIE
IN THE WINTER, FROM THE WATER, THROUGH THE WIND
IF A STRANGER ENDS UP
SENT BY FATE
CLAUDE, OZ & GARTH
IN THE WINTER, FROM THE WATER, THROUGH THE WIND
IF A STRANGER ENDS UP SENT BY FATE
DWIGHT, 10 & DOUG
IN THE WINTER, FROM THE WATER, THROUGH THE WIND
SENT BY FATE
ANNETTE
Are we going to be ready?
BEULAH
Well we have to be, don’t we?
On the plane, the passengers look out the window.

28 HOURS/
WHEREVER WE ARE

DIANE
When you include the original flight, we were on the plane probably twelve,
thirteen hours.
KEVIN T
We were on there fifteen hours.
KEVIN J (correcting him)
Twenty hours.
BOB
Twenty-eight hours. We were on the plane for over an entire day.
ALL
TWENTY-EIGHT HOURS
OVER AN ENTIRE DAY
THERE WAS ONE AISLE IN THE MIDDLE 27
EVERYONE KNEW EVERY INCH OF THAT PLANE
27 DAVID: This chorus came from an interview with Tom McKeon,
who had arrived on
a small Continental flight. Though most of the planes were larger
aircrafts, this
image helped with the claustrophobia of the flights.
PASSENGER 11
We were allowed out of our seats, but not off the plane.
KEVIN T
You never think about it, but airplane doors are twenty feet in the air.
KEVIN J
And even if you survived the jump, they probably would’ve shot you.
BOB
 24

Everyone knew every inch of that plane.

PASSENGER 3
You could go up to first class. You could stretch in the aisles.
PASSENGER 4
Our flight was full—there were children sleeping on the floor.
PASSENGER 5
It had three seats on each side. There was only one aisle in the middle.
HANNAH
We had no way to get information.
PASSENGER 12
This was before most people had mobile phones—and only a couple people
got through.
ALL
28 HOURS
OVER AN ENTIRE DAY
THERE WAS ONE AISLE IN THE MIDDLE
EVERYONE KNEW EVERY INCH OF THAT PLANE
28 HOURS
OVER AN ENTIRE DAY
THERE WAS ONE AISLE IN THE MIDDLE
ALL (CONT’D)
EVERYONE KNEW EVERY INCH OF
THAT PLANE
KEVIN T
Hello?
PASSENGER 7
Mom?
PASSENGER 5
Bonjour.
HANNAH
Operator?
Beverley is alone in the cockpit. She holds a phone to her ear.
BEVERLEY
TOM? OH, THANK GOD.
I FINALLY GOT THROUGH.
I BORROWED A PASSENGER’S PHONE.
HOW ARE YOU? ARE THE KIDS OKAY?
NO, I’M FINE, TOM. I’M FINE. 28
28 IRENE: Beverley and Tom have been to see the show more than
120 times now.
She is a member of the International Society of Women Airline
Pilots, a group
devoted to encouraging women to go into aviation, and she has
brought many
groups of female pilots to the show with her. It always makes us
very proud to see
 25

Beverley sporting a Come From Away purse and earrings, and Tom
introducing
himself to people as “No-I’m-fine-Tom-I’m-Fine” Tom.
SAFE AND SOUND ON THE GROUND
HERE IN NEWFOUNDLAND.
WE DON’T KNOW MUCH—
EXCEPT FOR THE BBC
LISTEN, I CAN’T TALK LONG
CAN YOU DO SOMETHING FOR ME?
KEVIN T
I’m okay.
PASSENGER 7
I’m fine.
PASSENGER 5
Oui. Bien.
HANNAH
Pick up.
BEVERLEY
TELL THE KIDS I’M ALRIGHT
TAKE THEM INTO THE KITCHEN
AND SHOW THEM THE MAP
THAT WE USED TO PUT PINS IN
FOR EACH DESTINATION
THAT WE FLEW TOGETHER
TELL THEM I’M FINE
PUT A PIN HERE IN GANDER
PASSENGER 12
On our plane, someone has a cell phone.
BOB
But then the battery dies.
ALI
There are phones in the backs of the seats.
HANNAH
But they don’t work.
PASSENGER 4
Half the passengers on our plane don’t speak English.
PASSENGER 11
Even if we knew what was happening, we don’t speak their language.
BOB
On our plane, we ask the flight attendants.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
But the captain says not to say too much. And that’s when rumors start
flying. 29
29 DAVID: “28 Hours” and “Wherever We Are” were originally two
separate songs.
 26

We merged them together to more efficiently reflect as many

experiences as
possible, using the rumor section as a bridge in and the radio
section as a bridge
out.
Passenger’s lines repeat through the planes, building to everyone speaking
at the end.
PASSENGER 5
There was an accident.
PASSENGER 12
An accident?
ALI
The U.S. airspace is closed.
KEVIN T
For the first time in history.
PASSENGER 11
Why won’t she tell us what’s/ happening? 30
30 IRENE: There are several moments in the script where everyone
is talking over
each other. Where there is a “/,” it indicates the next line interrupts
the previous line
at that point in the text.
ALI
A helicopter crashed in/ Pennsylvania.
PASSENGER 5
A helicopter crashed into a/ building.
BOB
A build/ing?
KEVIN T
The White/ House!
PASSENGER 7
The White House was bombed.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
I need you to calm down, ma’am!
Everyone calm down!
ALI
We need to do something.
PASSENGER 4
Tell us what is going on!!
BOB
It’s World War III! 31
31 DAVID: Moments like this, where the actors jump quickly from
character to
character, require a lot from our stage managers and follow-spot
ops, running
 27

multiple rapid-fire sound and light cues, while our sound mixer does
a kind of fader
ballet with his fingers, raising the volume for each line and then
dropping it down on
the next.
Ohmygod, it’s World War III! =
On another plane, Joey jumps up.
JOEY
WOOOOOO!
MEANWHILE ON OUR PLANE
WE DIDN’T HAVE A CLUE
WE WERE ALL GOING INSANE BECAUSE
ALL
THERE WASN’T SQUAT TO DO
JOEY
THEN THE CAPTAIN STARTS APOLOGIZING
SAYS ON BEHALF OF THE AIRLINE
I’M GIVING EACH AND EVERYONE SOME
ALL
COMPLIMENTARY BOOZE!
OPEN THE AIRPLANE DOORS
WAVE AT ALL THE CARS
HELLO TO WHOEVER YOU ARE—WHEREVER WE ARE
DIANE
The ground crews supplied whatever we needed.
KEVIN J
Nicotine patches.
NICK
Medication.
PASSENGER 5
Pampers.
ALL
Something to drink!
JOEY
SO THE FLIGHT ATTENDANTS
BROUGHT OUT ALL THE MINI BOTTLES OF LIQUOR
AND DELIVERED THEM TO EVERYONE
ALL
SOON EVERYONE GOT FRIENDLIER!
JOEY
I TOOK A COUPLE OF PICTURES OF THE VIEW THERE WITH MY CAMERA
WE DIDN’T KNOW WHERE WE WERE
ALL
BUT WE KNEW THAT WE WERE HAMMERED!
OPEN THE AIRPLANE DOORS! WAVE AT ALL THE LOCALS
SURELY THERE’S SOMETHING BETTER TO DO THAN PARK
 28

WHEREVER WE ARE
Joey leads the passengers in doing the Wave.
KEVIN T
We’d been sitting there for 14 hours when we pull out the Grey Goose.
KEVIN J
Kevin and I were kind of hiding it because, well…
KEVIN T
Because we (indicating KEVIN J) didn’t want to share it. Anyway, this woman
—this hot
mess behind us kept completely freaking out.
Delores is sitting behind them, completely freaking out.
DELORES
I don’t understand why they can’t let us off. I mean, just to stretch our legs, I
mean really? I
need to get some air! Oh my god! I need to get off this plane! 32
32 DAVID: Delores is based on a French woman on Captain Bass’s
plane who
complained loudly until RCMP were called. She was told if she
thought she felt
claustrophobic on the plane she would feel much more
claustrophobic in a jail cell.
KEVIN T
And my boyfriend, Kevin—we’re both named Kevin. It was cute for a while.
Anyway, Kevin
was not dealing with it well. 33
33 IRENE: We’d originally only interviewed Kevin T and he’d asked
that we respect
Kevin J’s privacy, so we changed many details, including naming
them both Collin.
And then in Seattle, Caesar received an email saying, “I think you’re
playing me in a
musical?! He came to see the show and loved it—and eventually
both Kevins wrote
to ask to change the “Collins” back to “Kevins.”
KEVIN J
I’m going to kill her.
Delores pushes the call button above her over
and over.
DELORES
Excuse me?! I would like to get off the plane. I am claustrophobic!
KEVIN J
Excuse me! Would you like some Xanax? 34 Because you are freaking out
and it is freaking
me out and we are all FREAKING THE FUCK OUT!!! 35
34 DAVID: One of my favourite stage door moments was when
Caesar was asked to
 29

sign someone’s bottle of Xanax.

35 IRENE: Some of the first lines from the show that our daughter
learned—and then
repeated loudly in a busy airport, “FREAKING THE FUTT OUT!”
ALL
OPEN THE AIRPLANE DOORS!
LET A LITTLE AIR IN HERE
CAUSE I COULD USE A SHOWER—OR A BAR (OR A BAR!)
OPEN THE AIRPLANE DOORS!
LOOK AT ALL THE PLANES OUT THERE
THERE MUST BE A CONVENTION, IT’S BIZARRE
WHEREVER WE ARE
3, 5, 10 & 12
28 HOURS
28 HOURS
28 HOURS
28 HOURS
2, 6, 9 & 11
28 HOURS
28 HOURS
28 HOURS
28 HOURS
1, 4, 7 & 8
OUT OF THE WINDOWS
NOTHING BUT DARKNESS
DARKNESS AND HEADLIGHTS
NOTHING TO SEE
Bonnie picks up her phone in the SPCA.
BONNIE
Hello? It’s Bonnie Harris down at the Gander SPCA. I went down with the rest
of the town
to look at all those planes. Well, I got to wondering if there weren’t any
animals on them…
No? There’s no animals on those planes? Not A ONE?! (They hang up on her)
Okay, then.
Thank you for your time. (She sees Doug calling her on the caller ID.) Doug!
(She answers
the phone.) Doug, are there animals on those planes?
DOUG
Uh… Probably?
BONNIE
“Probably.” Are they “probably” feeding them then? I’m heading over.
DOUG
Bonnie, there’s armed guards, the army, police everywhere—
BONNIE
Well, then they’ll have to shoot me.
 30

DOUG
… Bonnie? Bonnie? Bonnie!
In town hall.
CLAUDE
Garth.
GARTH
Claude.
CLAUDE
Look.
GARTH
Look.
CLAUDE
Look at it from my perspective.
GARTH
Will you look at it from my perspective?
on “My Heart Will Go On,” which not only reflected “Wherever We
Are” in the lyrics
but got some Canadiana with a Celine Dion reference. And the idea
of playing Titanic
is kind of hilarious.
CLAUDE
We’ve been coming to the table.
GARTH
We’ve been coming to the table too!
CLAUDE
We’ve got the college, the churches, and we’ve got the hotels for the crews.
But we need
your school buses. (supporters ad lib words of encouragement.) We’ve got no
effing way
to get them there…
GARTH
Well, why don’t you take them in your car? (supporters ad lib “Yeah why
don’t you take
them?,” etc.)
CLAUDE
Yeah, I can fit four in my Corolla, that’s a great start. (supporters ad lib
“Yeah, that’s a
great start,” etc.)
GARTH
That’s a great start.
CLAUDE
Great.
GARTH
Great.
CLAUDE
You think about it.
 31

GARTH
You think about it.
CLAUDE
You think about it.
GARTH
You think about it.
CLAUDE & GARTH
Jaysus!
JANICE (on camera)
2:10 p.m. School bus drivers “thinking about” leaving the picket lines.
CLAUDE
What’s the point of an emergency if no one treats it like an effing
emergency?… And you
can quote me on that.
HANNAH
The flight attendants keep telling us nothing’s wrong—but I’ve got kids and
I’ve got
grandkids—I know when someone’s hiding something. And when parents
need their kids to
stop asking questions… They start playing movies.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
We ran through every movie we had: Legally Blonde, Dr. Dolittle 2 … and
Titanic.
DELORES (totally drunk)
NEAR… FAR…
WHEREVER YOU— 36
36 DAVID: Delores’s song was originally “All By Myself.” We then
tried “Up Where We
Belong,” but finally landed
ALL
NOTHING TO DO, NOTHING TO SEE
THANK GOD WE STOPPED AT THE DUTY FREE
WHEREVER WE ARE
NICK
Do you mind if I sit here? I need to get some work done and there’s some
drunk people at
the back of the plane singing at the top of their lungs.
DIANE
No… Of course. I’m Diane.
NICK
Nick. How are you doing?
DIANE
I’m worried about someone. He was flying today. I just wish there was some
way to tell him
where I am.
NICK
 32

Newfoundland—no, you know that—you just can’t tell him. Right. I’m hoping
you’re one of
those people who laughs when English people say awkward things.
DIANE
I just wish we knew what was happening.
PASSENGER 2 (sotto)
What’s happening?
PASSENGER 5 (sotto)
What’s happening?
DIANE & NICK
SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN
DIANE
YOUR LIFE
NICK
AND YOUR WORK
ALL
WHEN THE WORLD MAY BE FALLING APART
DIANE & NICK
AND YOU THINK
DIANE
I’M ALONE
NICK
I’M ALONE
DIANE & NICK
AND I’M SO DAMN HELPLESS
Kevin T, Kevin J, Joey, and the other drunk passengers stand together on their
plane.
ALL (EXCEPT DIANE & NICK)
THERE’S NOTHING LEFT TO DO BUT DRINK
Two party girls rush to the front.
PARTY GIRLS
WE OPEN THE AIRPLANE DOORS
FLASH ALL THE CARS
WOOO! I’VE NEVER DONE THAT BEFORE
ALL (EXCEPT DIANE & NICK)
TWENTY-EIGHT HOURS GONE
OVER AN ENTIRE DAY
RUNNING OUT OF THINGS TO SAY
AND WONDERING IF THERE’S SOMEONE
ALL
GOING TO CLUE US IN
TELL US ALL WHAT’S HAPPENING
BECAUSE THE SUN IS SETTING
AND WE’RE SITTING IN THE DARK
WHEREVER WE ARE
BOB
 33

Later that night, I’m up in the cockpit with some of the other passengers
when the pilot puts
the radio on over the intercom—and the whole plane goes silent when the
president gives
his speech.
PRESIDENT BUSH
I ask the American people to join me in saying a thanks for all the folks who
have been
fighting hard to rescue our fellow citizens and to join me in saying a prayer
for the victims
and their families. The resolve of our great nation is being tested. But make
no mistake: we
will show the world that we will pass this test. God bless. 37
37 DAVID: This quote is taken from an earlier and less well-known
speech which
President Bush gave that day. When First Lady Laura Bush came to
see the show,
we heard afterward that she wondered why we had invented text
for her husband
and we quickly sent her a link to the speech we were referencing.
BEVERLEY
YOU GOT THROUGH TO THE AIRLINE
TOM, I’M OKAY—TELL ME WHAT’S HAPPENING OUT THERE
HOW BAD IS IT—TELL ME EVERYTHING
TOM. WHO WAS IN THE AIR?
NO—NO, I WOULDN’T HAVE KNOWN THEM
NO—NO ONE ON THAT AIRLINE
Charles…
Are you sure?
NO, I’M FINE, TOM.
I’M FINE.

DARKNESS
AND Trees

BOB
We can see them from the plane—this long line of headlights coming through
the darkness.
In the mayor’s office.
GARTH
Claude, can I have a word with you?
CLAUDE
Garth, I don’t have time to go in circles with you anymore. I’ve got the army
delivering a
thousand less cots than we were—
GARTH
 34

Look. The union just voted. You’ve got your busses. Our complaint’s with our
employer, not
with the people on those planes.
CLAUDE
Thank you.
GARTH
But we’re back on the line the minute this is over.
CLAUDE
Right.
Back on the plane.
ALL (EXCEPT FLIGHT ATTENDANT)
OFF OF THE AIRPLANE
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Ladies and Gentlemen, you can take only your carry-on items. Checked
luggage will remain
in the hold.
ALL (EXCEPT DIANE)
INTO THE AIRPORT
DIANE
The captain and flight attendants tell everyone to take their blankets and
pillows off the
plane.
ALL (EXCEPT KEVIN T & KEVIN J)
OUT OF THE WINDOWS
KEVIN T
We grab bottles of water too—
KEVIN J
No one has any idea where they’re taking us.
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
DARKNESS AND TREES
BOB
As we enter the airport, all those car lights are still aimed at us.
HANNAH
We’re scared. They’re probably scared too.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
The people here don’t know what to expect off of these planes.
KEVIN T
The airport looks like something left over from the Cold War. Kevin is like…
KEVIN J
Ohmygod. We’ve gone back in time.
BOB
The whole procedure—the soldiers and all the formality—it just makes me
really nervous. 38
38 IRENE: Depending on where their flights originated, some
passengers also had to
 35

endure going through a foot bath when they entered the airport,
because of
concerns about hand, foot and mouth disease.
Inside the airport, two customs officers process the passengers.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Citizenship?
DIANE
American.
NICK
British.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Purpose of your trip?
DIANE
Vacation.
NICK
Conference.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Destination?
DIANE
Dallas.
NICK
Texas.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Thank you.
Nick and Diane are waved on, replaced by Passenger 3 and Ali.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Citizenship?
PASSENGER 3
American.
ALI
Egyptian.
The customs officers and a few others stop to look at Ali.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Purpose of your trip?
PASSENGER 3
Family.
ALI
Business… just business.
CUSTOMS OFFICERS
Destination?
PASSENGER 3
LA.
ALI
Dallas then Washington, D.C.
CUSTOMS OFFICER 4 (to Passenger 3)
Thank you.
 36

CUSTOMS OFFICER 7 (to Ali)

Could you come with me, sir?
He escorts Ali to another area.
BEVERLEY
There’s a giant map on the wall of the airport and someone has written in
red marker, “You
are here.”
DIANE
Excuse me. I need to find a phone.
HANNAH
I need to call my son.
CUSTOMS OFFICER 4
Phones are over there. But it’s gonna be a while.
OZ
They’re all lined up at the airport payphones—so eventually we put an “Out
of Order” sign
on them just so we can get people on the buses.
CLAUDE
11:48 p.m. Buses and drivers are now taking passengers to shelters, not just
in Gander, but
also to Gambo, Appleton, and farther communities of Lewisporte, Norris Arm,
and
Glenwood. 39
39 DAVID: Gander gets a lot of the press from the show and the
story behind it, so it
was always important to us to include the surrounding communities
who also
housed and fed passengers. But this doesn’t even include the other
communities of
Corner Brook, Deer Lake, Stephenville, St. John’s, Halifax, and as far
away as
Vancouver, where other planes were diverted. Across the country so
many people
helped that it would take a hundred musicals to celebrate them all.
PASSENGER 12
Our bus sits there forever.
PASSENGER 5
While all the others leave.
PASSENGER 4
Finally, this other passenger gets on.
Ali slowly walks to the back of the bus as all the other passengers watch.
PASSENGER 11
This guy from the Middle East.
PASSENGER 2
Someone says he got questioned.
PASSENGER 7
 37

Someone says he got searched.

PASSENGER 1
And now… he’s on our bus.
JANICE
I try to interview the Red Cross, the Salvation Army—but they’ve got more
important things
to do than talk to me. That’s when I see them—the Plane People—through
the bus
windows. The terror on their faces. They have no idea where they’re going.
BEVERLEY
They take me and my crew in a separate van and I’m looking out the
window, trying to see
where we are, but it is pitch-dark. Now, I have flown over this area hundreds
and hundreds
of times. And it is just darkness—hardly any lights anywhere. And now here I
am. Oh my
god, this is just so remote.
MEN 40
INTO THE DARKNESS
40 DAVID: “Darkness and Trees” was originally a solo—and was
originated by Alycia
Novak at Sheridan, who then traveled with us, watching our
daughter during the
next three years of Come From Away productions.
WOMEN
STARS AND THE MOONLIGHT
MEN
BUT ALL AROUND US
WOMEN
NOTHING BUT DARKNESS
MEN
OUT OF THE WINDOWS
WOMEN
INTO THE DARKNESS
ALL
DARKNESS AND TREES
Garth sits in front of a bus of passengers, driving.
GARTH
Every school bus we got is goin’ back and forth all night. Out at the Salvation
Army
camp,41we’ve delivered passengers from Germany, England, and France.
And around three
in the morning, my bus is designated to take all these African people out
there.
41 IRENE: One story we heard was from a granddaughter, who
translated that they
 38

were being taken to a “camp”—and her grandmother, a Holocaust

survivor, started
crying, thinking of darker associations to the word.
MUHUMUZA
My family and I try to see out the bus windows. No one tells us where we are
going.
GARTH
Silence comes on the bus. We get outside of Gander and you could hear a
pin drop.
ALL (EXCEPT GARTH AND MUHUMUZA)
INTO THE DARKNESS
ONTO A GRAVEL ROAD
AND ALL AROUND US
MUHUMUZA
My wife and daughter are scared. They ask me what is happening and I do
not know.
GARTH
Behind me, this big man comes up to me and he says in this low voice . . .
DARKNESS AND TREES
MUHUMUZA
Wewe watuchukuwa wapi? 42
42 Translation: Where are you taking us?
GARTH
… What?
At the Academy, Beulah and Annette address everyone.
BEULAH
Ladies and Gentlemen, we need some help translating. If anyone speaks
Mandarin, can
you come to the library? And if anyone speaks Hindi, could you please come
to the
cafeteria? And if anyone speaks Newfoundlander, well lard tunder’n jaysus
god bless ya,
b’y.
ANNETTE
We’ve got passengers from all over the world coming off these busses, all
speaking
different languages. We can’t even say “hello.”
BEULAH
And if anyone knows—we think it’s…
ANNETTE
Moldovan.
BEULAH
Moldovan—that would also be helpful.
43 Translation: Yes, I speak it. Spanish is the language of love. I’m
not just a gym
teacher, I’m a teacher of passion.
 39

ANNETTE
Other passengers help us translate. Mrs. Noonan, our French teacher, turns
out to know a
little Russian. And Mr. Michaels, our gym teacher, apparently, he speaks
Spanish.
Mr. Michaels stands, holding a shaker and dressed as a fantasy Latin lover.
He moves to
Annette.
MR. MICHAELS
Si, hablo. Español es la lengua del amor. No sólo soy un profesor de
gimnasia, soy un
profesor de pasión. 43
He exits with a flourish. 44
ANNETTE
I’m sorry, what was I saying?
Meanwhile, in an airplane hold, Bonnie is searching with Doug.
DOUG
I said, you’ve got five minutes, Bonnie!
In the background, Actor 8 barks quietly.
BONNIE
There’s hundreds of suitcases—I can hear barking—but I can’t find them!
They fast them
before flying, so they’re starving and they need water.
Dwight enters.
DWIGHT
Sir? Sir! Oh, Doug. You got to get out of there. We’re keeping all personnel
out of the holds
until—
DOUG
Sorry, Dwight. It’s the wife—you know, Bonnie—from the SPCA—she’s
feeding some
animals inside. Nothing’s coming off.
Actor 3 meows.
BONNIE
I found a cat! His name is Lyle! There’s a pill taped to his carrier. Well, I’m
glad I got in here
to GIVE IT TO HIM! It’s okay, Lyle.
DWIGHT
Bonnie—I need you to get out of—
DOUG
Bonnie, you got to move your arse!
BONNIE
Doug, I have found ONE cat! Do you think it’s LYLE who’s barking?!
DOUG (meekly underneath)
No…
BONNIE (to Lyle)
 40

Here’s some crunchy, Lyle. I’ll be back to give you your pill.
DWIGHT
Listen to me—FAA sent over new orders—we’re treating all U.S. planes as
bomb threats.
DOUG
Oh, god. Bonnie!
BONNIE
Doug… Doug!
DOUG
What? Bonnie? Bonnie, talk to me!
BONNIE
Doug! There are monkeys on this plane.
Two bus drivers, Micky and Terry take a seat. They speak over their
shoulders to their
passengers, as they shift into gear and drive.
44 IRENE: All of Annette’s fantasies are inspired by our Second City
improv training.
We didn’t expect most of these “cut to” moments to make it to
Broadway—but they
did! Also: Mr. Michaels was named after Michael Rubinoff.”
TERRY
Climb aboard.
MICKY
Hop right in! You look some tired.
TERRY
Nothing to worry about now.
MICKY
We’ll get you where you’re going.
TERRY
I’m guessing you’ve never heard of Gander before. Well, that’s it in the
rearview mirror.
MICKY
You’ll need to reset your watches—we’ve got our own time zone here.
Everything happens
a half an hour later in Newfoundland.
TERRY
You’ve all seen the airport—used to be the biggest airport in North America.
Planes used to
stop here to gas up from everywhere.
MICKY
Frank Sinatra. Albert Einstein.
TERRY
Muhammad Ali.
BOTH
The Queen.
TERRY
 41

This is where the Beatles first set foot in North America!

MICKY
And my father once went sledding with Fidel Castro!
TERRY
Then they invented jet planes that can get across the ocean on one tank…
MICKY
So there’s no need to refuel anymore…
TERRY
Leaving us with this giant airport.
MICKY
There’s talk lately about tearing it down.
TERRY
Lucky for you, we haven’t got around to it yet.
They brake suddenly, screeching.
MICKY
Now there’s the reason I drives slow.
TERRY
That there in the middle of the road.
MICKY & TERRY
Yeah. That’s a moose. 45
45 IRENE: Most of our nights in Gander, we would interview people
until dark. Then
we would drive half an hour in the darkness back to Gambo where
we were staying.
On the edge of town, there is a giant cutout of a moose to warn
motorists to be
careful (they are a serious concern and can total a car). At one
point, in the opening
number we had a lyric “IF YOU KEEP ON HEADING EAST ALONG YOUR
PLEASURE
CRUISE/YOU’RE BOUND TO HIT THE OCEAN OR YOU’RE BOUND TO
HIT A
MOOSE.”
Everyone faces forward, motionless. An incredibly long pause.
Even longer than that. 46
46 DAVID: I think this moment is funny for many reasons, not the
least of which is it’s
one of the only times that everyone finally stops talking onstage.
MICKY
She’ll move when she’s good and ready.
On one of the buses, Nick approaches Diane.
NICK
Mind if I sit here? The drunk people from our plane are snoring back there…
DIANE
Oh hello, Nick! Please do… I thought we’d lost you.
NICK
 42

No—I just needed to get an emergency prescription filled—my medicine is in

my suitcase.
Nothing serious. Not like, “Ohmygod, he’s off his medication.” I’ll stop talking
now.
DIANE
It’s fine.
NICK
… It’s heart medicine. I’ve got a slight arrhythmia 47 —nothing serious.
There you go—
everything you need to know about me.
47 IRENE: Nick’s slight arrhythmia goes back to the very first
workshop at Sheridan
College; the students polled their parents about their various
ailments and one of
them suggested their father’s heart condition, which was serious
enough for
medication, but not so serious that it would be worrisome.
DIANE
Okay. I’m allergic to bananas and I have never had the chicken pox.
They both smile.
NICK
Any news yet about your husband who was flying today?
DIANE
My—? No—do you mind if we just don’t talk about that. I haven’t been able
to get to a
phone.
NICK
I’m sorry. I’ll help you find a phone as soon as we get … wherever we’re
going.
GARTH
Finally, out of the darkness, my bus arrives at the Salvation Army camp. 48
48 DAVID: This was an amalgamation of two stories we’d heard—one
about driving
African passengers to the Salvation Army camp, and one about
using a bible to
communicate with Moldovan refugees at the Baptist Church.
MUHUMUZA
We pass through a large gate and the bus pulls to a stop. And through the
windows—out
there in the darkness—we see all these people coming out of the buildings.
GARTH
Now we rarely use them, but everyone’s dusted off their Salvation Army
uniforms to
welcome these people.
MUHUMUZA
There are soldiers everywhere.
 43

The man at the front opens the door.

GARTH
I say, “Here you are. Out you go.” But he’s not moving. None of them are.
GARTH
But then I notice his wife. Well, she’s clutching a bible. Now, obviously I can’t
read it, but
their bible—it’ll have the same number system ours does. So I ask to see it
and I’m
searching for something… and then—in Philippians 4:6—I give them their
bible and I’m
pointing and saying, look! Philippians 4:6—Be anxious for nothing. Be
anxious for nothing.
GARTH & MUHUMUZA
And that’s how we started speaking the same language. 49
49 IRENE: The revolve starts to move for the first time at this point. I
love watching a
chair come around at the exact time Chad walks by it and grabs his
jacket, put there
by someone else in some other scene, to become Kevin T from
Garth, and the way
Rodney’s walk slowly changed between Muhumuza to become Bob.
ALL (EXCEPT GARTH & MUHUMUZA)
KATI YA GIZA
GHAFLA MWANGAZA
PANDE ZOTE SISI
GIZA NA MITI
1, 2, 6, 9, 10, 11 & 12
KATI YA GIZA
GHAFLA MWANGAZA
MA-BADILIKO
GIZA NA MITI
KATI YA GIZA
MA-BADILIKO
3, 4, 5, 7 & 8
OUT OF THE DARKNESS
SUDDENLY BRIGHTNESS
EVERYTHING CHANGES
DARKNESS AND TREES
OUT OF THE DARKNESS
SUDDENLY LIGHT 50
50 DAVID: When this story was first dramatized with a busload of
Moldovans, instead
of Africans singing in Swahili, we used a folk tune, first in Russian
and then in
English:
 44

HEY HI—KOGDA VY GOVORITEYA TOL’KO SLYSHU—LA-LA-LA HEY HI—

KOGDA YA
GOVORYUVY SLYSHITE TOJEH SAMOYEH
Translation: HEY HI—WHEN YOU SPEAK, I ONLY HEAR LA LA LA LA
HEY HI—WHEN
I SPEAK,YOU HEAR THE SAME THING.
BEULAH
Welcome to Gander Academy—nicest hotel on the east coast, except for
those with actual
beds. My name’s Beulah. Washrooms are just down the hall. There’s food
over there if
you’re hungry—and clothes, if you’d like to change. I’ll show you now where
you’re going to
sleep. Let us know if there’s anything else you need.
Everyone surrounds Beulah.
KEVIN J
So what really happened?
Everyone asks similar questions.
BEULAH
Well… what’s the last thing you heard?
KEVIN J
There was an accident in New York.
Everyone chimes in, agreeing.
BEULAH
Okay… I’m going to show you now to your rooms, and then if you want to
come back,
we’ve got two TVs set up in the cafeteria with the news on—so you can see
what’s actually
happened for yourselves…

LEAD us out OF THE DARKNESS

JANICE
I didn’t even think—they haven’t seen any of it yet.
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE & HANNAH)
LEAD US OUT OF THE DARKNESS
HANNAH
We’re all staring at those images.
BEULAH
And we just stand helpless watching them.
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
LEAD US SOMEWHERE TO SAFETY
BOB
We barely know where we are, but we know it’s not there. 51
51 IRENE: There used to be a “Thank God” said by Delores
immediately after Bob’s
 45

line, which was verbatim. At NAMT, David’s New Yorker cousin saw
the presentation
and reminded us that most of the audience had been there,
including her. She had
escaped the towers that day. We cut the line.
ALL
LEAD US FAR FROM DISASTER
BEVERLEY
Charles Burlingame was the captain of Flight 77 that crashed into the
Pentagon. 52 I just
saw him at a pub in London. You can’t imagine. A pilot will fight to the ends
of the earth to
save his airplane. He just will.
52 DAVID: When we visited the Pentagon, our entire team found
Captain Burlingame’s
memorial and sent a picture of us there to Beverley.
ALL
LEAD US OUT OF THE NIGHT
KEVIN T
We watch those images for hours.
THEY all stand and watch, unmoving. Suddenly THEY all react in shock.
Until someone finally turns it off.
Claude holds up a remote control and turns off the TV.

Phoning Home

CLAUDE
1:15 a.m.
ALL (EXCEPT CLAUDE)
Wednesday.
CLAUDE
September 12.
CLAUDE
Crisis counselors are called to Gander Academy.
BEULAH
The plane people—they’re exhausted—but they don’t want to sleep. And
we’re standing
there, ready with all that food. But that’s not what they want. They want
phones.
JANICE (on camera)
1:45 am—Six phones are put on tables for the plane people to use free of
charge—lined up
alongside the road by the Newtel building.
BEULAH
An hour later, they setup twenty more phones.
CLAUDE
 46

An hour after that, there’s severnty-five phones and computers with Internet
—all being used
round the clock.
A number of passengers appear on telephones.
PASSENGER 5
HELLO? YES—IT’S ME.
BOB
DAD, I’M OKAY. IT’S OKAY.
HANNAH
I’M CALLING FROM CANADA.
KEVIN J
SAFE AND SOUND ON THE GROUND HERE IN ICELAND
KEVIN T
NO, NEWFOUNDLAND
BOB
YEAH.
PASSENGER 5, KEVIN J, KEVIN T, BOB
WE JUST SAW THE NEWS
HANNAH
HAVE YOU HEARD YET FROM KEV?
KEVIN J
OR CELENA
PASSENGER 5
CALL MICAH 53
53 IRENE: Micah is our daughter’s best friend in Toronto, and her
parents, Anna and
Meredith (together with Heather, our old friend), helped us too
many times to count
while writing this. Celena’s is a bakery that we used to write at in
Toronto. The name
“Lauren” is a small tribute to 9/11 survivor Lauren Manning. And of
course, Kev is
what Hannah still calls her son.
PASSENGER 7
AND LAUREN
KEVIN T
MY PARENTS
PASSENGER 6
MY AUNT
DIANE
IT’S DIANE. NO, I’M FINE.
Where’s David? 54
54 DAVID: Diane’s son David worked in the air force, and she was
afraid that he may
have been flying that day.
She covers her mouth and starts crying.
 47

Oh, thank God.

NICK
Hello. It’s Nick Marson—My plane’s been diverted. Can you pass on to
someone at head
office that I’m fine?… No, no—I just thought someone should know.
JANICE (on camera)
3:45 a.m. Overnight, the community’s population has gone from
approximately nine
thousand to sixteen thousand. I’m sure barely any of us have slept tonight.
We’re hopeful
that our visitors will be back in the air come morning.
KEVIN T
I woke up from a dream which I can’t quite remember, but there was this
music in it that I’d
heard somewhere before.
KEVIN J
I woke up from a dream that we were stuck in some backwater Canadian
town and that my
air mattress deflated.
BOB
I woke up to the smell of… freshly baked bread.
ANNETTE
4:00 a.m. in Newfoundland is breakfast time in Germany. And we’ve got a lot
of passengers
here from Frankfurt, 55 so breakfast starts at 4 a.m., and we start scrambling
eggs.
55 IRENE: Including the mayor of Frankfurt, to whom Claude offered
his office!
BOB
Poached eggs, scrambled eggs, omelettes.
DIANE
Fried Bologna.
NICK
Something called “toutans.” 56
56 DAVID: Toutans are fried bread dough and are ridiculously good.
Often served with
molasses or syrup, I’d also recommend the toutan breakfast
sandwich at Gander’s
Breadbox Café.
KEVIN T
I saw a casserole dish I don’t think I could lift.
BOB
They made enough food to feed seven thousand people. It’s like they never
slept.
BEULAH
There’s this one man—from the
 48

Middle East—well, we don’t really

know. Hasn’t said a word to a soul—
and some of the other passengers seem
a bit wary of him. So, it’s a little odd to find
him poking around the kitchen.
ALI (surprised)
Hello.
BEULAH
Hello. Can I help you with something?
ALI
I would like to be of assistance with the food.
BEULAH
No. That’s not necessary.
ALI
But/ I am—
BEULAH
Really. You go out there and sit down.
CLAUDE
We’ve been going all night, but we can’t stop. I splash some cold water on
my face and just
keep going. We’ve got seven thousand scared and angry people who don’t
want to be here.
And they’re about to wake up.

Costume
PARTY

DIANE
IN A CROWDED ROOM FILLED WITH STRANGERS SLEEPING 57
57 IRENE: “Costume Party” was originally a song just Diane and
Beverley. I was
inspired by Elphaba and Glinda’s duets in Wicked and wanted to
include the same
powerful female storytelling in this show. As it became more of an
ensemble piece,
the song had to be rewritten.
KEVIN T
AN AIRPLANE BLANKET AND PILLOW ON THE FLOOR
DIANE
THE SUN COMES STREAMING THROUGH THE WINDOW
KEVIN T & DIANE
AND I CAN’T SLEEP ANYMORE
KEVIN J
STARING AT THESE STRANGERS—WAKING UP AROUND ME
HANNAH
SITTING IN A CROWD OF PEOPLE WAITING FOR THE PHONE
 49

KEVIN J
AND IN A TOWN THAT’S SUDDENLY DOUBLED POPULATION
KEVIN T, HANNAH, DIANE, KEVIN J
I FEEL SO ALONE
KEVIN J
IT’S LIKE ANY OF US COULD HAVE DIED ON TUESDAY
KEVIN T
AND LIKE WE’RE DARED TO SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY TODAY
DIANE
I’M FEELING DIFFERENT
HANNAH
DISTANT
KEVIN J
STRANGE
KEVIN T
WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE HERE?
HANNAH
WHERE AM I?
DIANE
NO ONE KNOWS ME HERE
KEVIN T, HANNAH, DIANE & KEVIN J
WHO AM I IF I DON’T FEEL LIKE THE ME FROM YESTERDAY?
NICK
I wake up in a crowded room full of people sleeping on the floor and I see
Diane and ask,
“Are we leaving?”
DIANE
Any time now.
NICK
Is your hair different? I mean… you look nice. I like it.
DIANE
Oh! Thank you. No shampoo for three days.
KEVIN T
They start handing out clothes to anyone who needs them.
KEVIN J
I haven’t changed my clothes in thirty-nine hours.
BOB
I wanted to burn my socks.
KEVIN J
Kevin puts on this plaid thing. He says he’s “incognito” and that he’s going to
“blend in with
the locals,” but he just looks like a gay lumberjack. 58
58 DAVID: After seeing the show the first time, Kevin T originally
told us he would
never wear buffalo plaid. But I love that several years later, he and I
have to check to
 50

see if we’re both wearing our gay lumberjack suits to opening

nights.
DIANE
CHANGING INTO ANOTHER WOMAN’S DONATED SET OF CLOTHES
KEVIN T
LOOKING DIFFERENT—FEELING KIND OF DIFFERENT TOO
DIANE
I CAN’T QUITE EXPLAIN
KEVIN T
BUT WHEN I WOKE
DIANE
WHEN DAVID WASN’T ON THAT PLANE
KEVIN T & DIANE
IT’S LIKE I CHANGED INTO SOMEBODY ELSE—BUT WHO?
AND IT’S SOMEHOW LIKE WE’RE AT A COSTUME PARTY 59
59 IRENE: “Costume Party” was easily the most rewritten—and most
rechoreographed song in the show and was almost scrapped at one
point. The title
and theme come from direct quotes from Diane, so we never wanted
to just start all
over again.
KEVIN T
AND FOR A SECOND YOU ARE NOT YOURSELF
DIANE
YOU ARE NOT YOURSELF
KEVIN T
AND YOU LOOK AROUND AND BLINK YOUR EYES
DIANE
AND BARELY EVEN RECOGNIZE
KEVIN T & DIANE
THE PERSON IN THE MIRROR WHO’S TURNED INTO SOMEONE ELSE
KEVIN J (on the phone)
Hey, Little Sister—Yeah, still here where they eat rainbows for breakfast. Are
you taking
care of mom? No. I’m just freaking out. I wish I was home. No, not LA.
Brooklyn. Shut up.
You’re such a brat. No. I just needed to hear your voice.
Beulah approaches Hannah.
BEULAH
Excuse me? Are you Hannah?
HANNAH (expectant)
Yes, that’s me.
BEULAH
My name’s Beulah. Someone told me your son’s a firefighter… Mine is too.
60 Here in town.
And I know Gander’s not New York, but… Is there anything I can do?
 51

60 IRENE: Beulah’s son, Aubrey, passed away shortly after the show
opened on
Broadway. We were very thankful that we could bring Aubrey
onstage on our
opening night and a few days later introduce him to Prime Minister
Trudeau.
HANNAH
No. I just need to hear from my son.
BEULAH
I understand.
Beulah leaves.
HANNAH
PRAYING FOR A PHONE CALL
KEVIN J
PRAYING FOR A WAY HOME
HANNAH & KEVIN J
ASKING QUESTIONS
KEVIN J
ASKING CAN I GET BACK ON THAT GODFORSAKEN PLANE?
HANNAH
AND ALL AROUND ME, PEOPLE CHAT
KEVIN J
AND PEOPLE ACT LIKE NOTHING’S HAPPENED
HANNAH & KEVIN J
AND I NEED TO HEAR WE’RE GOING BACK BEFORE I GO INSANE
DIANE 61
61 DAVID: An original cut lyric from the Diane/Beverley duet,
showing some of
Beverley’s obstacles and telling Diane’s original story—that after
meeting Nick the
night before, she woke up early to freshen up. And another
passenger walked in and
gave her a look that made her question what the point of putting
lipstick on was.
Anyway, she returned and lay down and Nick woke up, quite
confused at how good
she looked after sleeping on a cot all night.
LOOKING AT THIS WOMAN—IN THE MIRROR HERE
IN ANOTHER WOMAN’S DONATED SET OF CLOTHES
I CAN’T QUITE EXPLAIN,
BUT WHEN I FOUND OUT DENNIS WASN’T ON THAT PLANE
ME AND THE WOMAN IN THE MIRROR WERE JUXTAPOSED
BEVERLEY
PUTTING ON MY UNIFORM—AND A BRAVE FACE
HAVE TO SEE MY PASSENGERS AND CHECK IN WITH MY CREW
TELL YOURSELF TO FIGHT THE FEAR, ’CAUSE THERE ARE HUNDREDS HERE
 52

COUNTING ON YOU
DIANE (& BEVERLEY)
AND IT’S SOMEHOW LIKE A MESSED-UP COSTUME PARTY
(SOMEHOW LIKE I’M IN A COSTUME)
WHERE YOU BARELY EVEN RECOGNIZE YOURSELF
(BARELY EVEN RECOGNIZE YOURSELF)
AND YOU HOLD YOURSELF TOGETHER AND YOU
DIANE & BEVERLEY
WAIT TO SEE IF WHETHER
YOU ARE BETTER JUST TO BE SOMEBODY ELSE

“And it’s somehow like we’re at a costume party

and for a second you are not yourself.”

DIANE (& BEVERLEY)

THIS YOUNG GIRL STUMBLED IN (SO I STUMBLED THROUGH THE HOTEL)
AND SAW ME WITH MY LIPSTICK (AND I STOPPED BESIDE A MIRROR)
SHE LOOKED AT ME LIKE, REALLY? (I LOOKED AT MYSELF LIKE, REALLY?)
AND THEN LEFT ME STANDING STARING AT MYSELF
(STANDING, STARING AT MYSELF)
AND SO I STOPPED (AND SO I STARED)
I TOOK MY HAIR DOWN (I PUT MY HAT ON)
I PUT MY MAKEUP BACK INTO MY HANDBAG (I PUT ON A BRAVE FACE)
AND PUT TRUST IN MYSELF 62
62 IRENE: Part of the challenge with this song is that it had to
represent multiple
points of view—Kevin T and Diane wanted to explore this new world,
while Kevin J
and Hannah wanted desperately to go home, and Beverley was
wrestling with being
strong in the face of watching her industry collapse. Plus, it is
extremely hard to cut
anything sung by Jenn Colella—but eventually we whittled it down
into a foursome—
two wanting to seize the day and two wanting to go.
BEVERLEY
Good morning. I’m Captain Beverly Bass. Now I know this is going to be hard
to hear, but
the American airspace remains closed. (Passengers react in shock.) I can’t
tell you how
long we’ll be on the ground. But we are going to be here for some time.
DIANE
HERE FOR SOME TIME
KEVIN J
HERE FOR SOME TIME
HANNAH
 53

HERE FOR TOO LONG

KEVIN T
HERE FOR HOW LONG
KEVIN J, 10 & 12
WHEN WILL WE KNOW
DIANE, 5, 6, 7 & 11
WHEN WILL WE KNOW
ALL (EXCEPT BEULAH & JANICE)
HOW MUCH LONGER?
HANNAH
Beulah, wait. Can you help me find a Catholic Church?
DIANE (to Nick)
I can’t sit here. I need to get some air.
KEVIN T
Let’s go see where we are. It’ll do you good.
KEVIN J
What’ll do me good is to lie down and pretend this isn’t happening.
KEVIN T
Suit yourself.
DIANE & KEVIN T
AND EVERYTHING IS DIFFERENT THAN IN TEXAS (CALIFORNIA)
THE PINE TREES AND THE BEAUTY OF THIS PLACE
AND THE HOUSES THERE TOGETHER
ALL ALONG THE RIVER
WELL, YOU COULDN’T WIPE THE SMILE OFF MY FACE 63
63 IRENE: I still miss this bridge we had in the original version that
referenced what
the characters would be seeing once they stepped outside. But it
didn’t reflect the
frustration and fear that some of our characters were feeling and it
was too soon for
Diane to feel so relaxed and at home.
HANNAH & KEVIN J
AND IT’S SOMEHOW LIKE WE’RE STUCK HERE
AT A MESSED-UP COSTUME PARTY
DIANE & KEVIN T
AND THERE’S NOTHING HERE FAMILIAR
HANNAH & KEVIN J
FAR AWAY FROM THOSE YOU CARE FOR
KEVIN T, KEVIN J, HANNAH & DIANE
ON AN ISOLATED ISLAND IN BETWEEN
THERE AND HERE
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE, KEVIN T, KEVIN J, HANNAH &
DIANE)
THERE AND HERE
JANICE
 54

By the middle of the day on Wednesday, I’m coordinating menus for seven
thousand
people. (to the camera) Ladies and Gentlemen, the Rotary Club is looking for
some fish
dishes. And we have a bunch of German passengers down at the Moose Club
who’d like to
try elk… No, sorry. That’s the Elks Club that’s looking for moose. Sorry, I’m
new.
BEULAH
Well, if you won’t try cod tongue, we got cheeseburgers—or we got hot dogs
too—and
there’s tuna casserole over there—or I could make you up a bologna
sandwich?
KEVIN J
Are there vegetables in Canada?
KEVIN T (to Beulah)
We’re vegetarians.
KEVIN J
I converted him.
KEVIN T
Anyway, I notice this other passenger who hasn’t eaten anything at all—
KEVIN J
Kevin’s suddenly in everyone else’s business.
KEVIN T
So, I notify our hosts.
RABBI
No. No, thank you. Please. I’m fine. 64
64 DAVID: It took some time to get in touch with the rabbi, but he
eventually came to
meet our London company—and was insistent about how important
it is that this
story be told.
BEULAH
Turns out he’s an Orthodox Jewish rabbi and he only eats kosher food. Now,
we have all
kinds of people living in Newfoundland: Protestants, Baptists, Catholics,
Salvation Army-ists
—but not a lot of Jewish people.
RABBI
The next thing I know, I’m set up in the faculty lounge, making a kosher
kitchen for any other
Jewish passengers—but also for two Hindu women, some Muslims.
KEVIN T
And a couple vegetarians.
ANNETTE
 55

One of the pilots for Virgin Atlantic—Captain Bristol—he’s a very—strong

leader. He’s good
to his passengers. And he’s handsome too. Anyway, he takes me aside and
he says… 65
65 IRENE: One of the women we interviewed talked with great
admiration about a
certain handsome captain of a diverted Virgin Atlantic flight—and
we eventually got
to meet him when he also attended the show in London.
CAPTAIN BRISTOL (over the top romantic)
I’ve been watching you—you’re doing beautiful work. I’d like you to be my
personal liaison
and… work closely with me, helping to handle anything I might need.
Captain Bristol exits. The fantasy ends.
BEULAH
Annette—what’ya on about? He did not say that.
ANNETTE
Well, he said something like that.
Ali approaches Beulah holding a bowl.
ALI
Miss Beulah? Hello.

BEULAH (caught off guard)

Ah!… Hello, Ali.
ALI
May I ask? This food. What is it?
BEULAH
That’s called Cod au Gratin. 66
66 DAVID: I initially wrote a recipe song called “Cod Au Gratin.”
Irene wisely stopped
that quickly.
ALI
Cod oh…?
BEULAH
Fish with cheese. It’s fish. With cheese.
ALI
… Are you sure I cannot help you with the food?
CLAUDE
People start taking passengers back to their houses to get cleaned up and
then inviting
them to dinner—and then putting them up in their guest rooms.
MARTHA
Look, Misses. I’m just twenty weeks along and my Terry’s already set up the
nursery, you
and your little one will be much more comfortable there.
BRITNEY
 56

Thank you for shopping at Walmart. Would you like to come back to my
house for a
shower?
ANNETTE 67
67 DAVID: Another cut section true story—I miss it mostly for the
WHOOP-WHOOP
callback!
People ask me, “How do I get downtown,” and I’m like—just walk down those
stairs. At the
bottom, there’ll be somebody ready to give you a lift. Probably our
constable, Oz Fudge.
OZ
I give this one fella a lift and he’s just delighted.
OLD MAN
I’m ninety years old and I’ve never been in the back of a police cruiser! Turn
on the siren!
The chorus all make a “WHOOP-WHOOP” noise together.
BOB
People are saying “we want you to come to our house.” And I think, what is
up with this? I
mean, are they charging for these “free” showers? Or are they gonna go all
Norman
Bates… Anyway, I wasn’t falling for it. But finally, I’m invited back to the
mayor of
Appleton’s house—that sounds fancy, but it’s not—there’s a mayor for every
town of a
thousand people in Newfoundland. There’s the mayor of Gander (he points
to Claude).
There’s the mayor of Lewisporte (Claude puts on glasses). There’s the mayor
of Gambo
(Claude puts on a mustache). Anyway, I’m staying with the mayor of
Appleton. (Claude
puts on a hat, becoming Derm)
DERM
Come on in, son. The Irish whiskey’s in the bar downstairs.
BOB
His wife shows me where my bedroom is and where the shower is and
through it all, I keep
thinking—where am I going to leave my wallet? Someone is gonna steal my
wallet.
KEVIN J
Someone says there’s a way out of here. They say there might be a boat—
KEVIN T
Kevin, we’re on the other side of the continent. We’re not taking a boat.
KEVIN J
So I stop an officer and ask him, “How do I get back home?”
 57

BOB
Yeah, how do we get out of here?
OZ
Well, you take a taxi to the Goose—there’s a bus there to Port aux Basques,
leaves once a
day, that’s about six hours. Once you’re there, you take the ferry across the
Gulf, right?
That’s eight hours or so, then you catch another bus, not sure how often they
leave, but it’s
another eight hours to Yarmouth 68 where you can get another ferry to the
U.S. border,
that’s another four hours or so—and from Bar Harbor you should be able to
grab a
Greyhound to wherever you need to go.
68 DAVID: Occasionally we’ve had helpful fact-checkers write to us
to help us get
details correct, though usually, we’ve already been down most
research rabbit holes
over and over. In this case, yes, the ferry leaves from Digby, Nova
Scotia, not
Yarmouth; however, in 2001, it left from Yarmouth. We checked
about a million times.
It’s about two or three days travel. But it’s sure a nice view.
BEVERLEY
I don’t leave the hotel. I wait by the phone. Wait for someone to tell me we
can fly again.
Planes aren’t made to just sit on the tarmac—planes are made to be in
constant motion.
They arrive, you switch crew, you switch passengers, you empty the honey
buckets, and
the plane keeps going. When they sit still for too long, well, it’s not good for
’em. They start
to break down. 69
69 IRENE: When Beverley first said this to us, we knew it had to be
in the show,
representing both how planes and people began to break down this
week.
DIANE
Our pilot says we’re not leaving anytime soon, and Nick says…
NICK
I might take a picture or two before we go.
KEVIN T
I finally convince Kevin to go for a walk. 70
70 DAVID: Almost the entire book of the show is scored like a movie
—and Ian
 58

Eisendrath spent hours with us working out what each scene

needed. I still hum the
bass line to the walk music here when I go on walks—and during
band rehearsals, I
often wish we hadn’t written so many words to cover up Ian’s
beautiful
arrangements and August Eriksmoen’s incredible orchestrations.
KEVIN J
There’s four of us to begin with. This Texan woman and this English guy with
a disposable
camera and a huge stick up his ass.
KEVIN T
They’re nice enough… (pointing at KEVIN) Kevin and I are a little wary of
telling people
we’re together.
KEVIN J
I mean you just don’t know how redneck people can be.
DIANE (happily)
This nice gay couple come along with us.
NICK
We kind of make small talk. They ask me what I do.
KEVIN J
He works for this oil company in England and she was there visiting with her
son.
NICK
Wait… You’ve got a son?
DIANE
Yes. David. The one who was flying on Tuesday.
KEVIN J
She goes on and on about England and how she didn’t get to travel much
when she was
married.
NICK
Wait… You’re divorced?
DIANE
Yes. For a long time now.
KEVIN T (to Nick)
What about you?
NICK
No. Not divorced, I mean… Not that I’m married! I’m neither. I travel a lot for
work—
KEVIN T
Kevin and I work for an environmental energy company. It’s my company—
and Kevin’s my
secretary.
KEVIN J
 59

I’m his sexy-tary. 71

71 IRENE: One of my day jobs was as a receptionist, and in one
particular place, one
of the higher-up women would refer to me as the “Sexy-tary.” It
made me feel awful.
Then David put it in the script and it was aaaall worth it.
KEVIN T
Anyway—we do a lot of green work, so we generally hate people who work in
oil.
NICK
I just got the feeling that they hated me.
DIANE
Then they want to go into some old building that looks like a shed. Now,
they’d heard it was
a bar, but I wasn’t going into a bar in the middle of the afternoon with three
men I had just
met.
NICK
And I think, I’ll stay with Diane, you know, instead of the gay men who hate
me.
They exit in opposite directions
In an airplane hangar, Bonnie is feeding animals, as Doug gets increasingly
frustrated.
BONNIE
Doug’s helping me feed the animals—and after security checks each plane—
slow as cold
molasses—we finally find eight dogs, nine cats—one of whom’s epileptic—not
to mention
two rare Bonobo chimpanzees! And the female Bonobo is pregnant. We’ve
got to get them
off these planes! (into the phone) Hello? Is the mayor there? It’s Bonnie
Harris again. Yes,
I’ll hold.
DOUG
FAA was pretty clear about “No rare chimpanzees on Canadian soil.”
Bonnie hands a bucket to Doug.
BONNIE
Doug. Take that.
DOUG
—what is that?
BONNIE
It’s rare chimpanzee shit. What do you think it is? (into the phone) Yes? The
mayor! Yes! I’ll
hold!
DOUG (finally losing his patience)
I’ve got to get back to air traffic control!
 60

BONNIE
Doug—look up! Do you see anything flying?
DOUG
I can’t see across the friggin’ Atlantic!
BONNIE
Just get me more litter from the truck!
DOUG
Get your own litter!
Doug exits.
BONNIE
Fine then! Goodbye! (into the phone) No! No! Not you! Hello? Hello?!
At town hall. Claude enters, and the staff fires a barrage of questions at him.
ALL (EXCEPT CLAUDE) (variously)
Claude! Excuse me. Claude! Mr. Mayor! Claude!
STAFF 8
Health Canada says all this food needs refrigeration, but we’ve got nowhere
to store it—
none of the shelters are equipped for this!
STAFF 1
We’re getting three more truckloads of food tonight—
STAFF 8
Stop them! We’ve got nowhere to put it!
STAFF 7
Well, then what do we feed people?
STAFF 12
We also need that girl at Rogers to announce that rotary, hockey, boys and
girls club—
everything’s canceled until further notice. 72
72 IRENE: Each actor plays, at the least, a come-from-away and a
local character (in
this section Lee MacDougall plays Nick, then Doug in the next scene,
and then Staff
12 in the next). Not only is this theatrically fun (and economical
when telling sixteen
thousand stories), but it reminds the audience that we could all be
in each other’s
shoes—at any moment you could be helping or need to be helped.
STAFF 1
That Rogers girl does NOT know what she’s doing.
STAFF 2
Until further notice? What does that mean?
STAFF 4
Now there’s five vats of chili. My uncle has a truck.
STAFF 6
You need to talk to Health Canada.
STAFF 8
 61

Well cancel the effing food too!

STAFF 12
Don’t look at me! It’s not my decision!

“We somehow ended up in the gayest town in

Newfoundland.”

CLAUDE (over the previous—quieting them down)

Hold on.
A pause.
Did you just say that hockey’s canceled? 73
73 DAVID: This is one of my favorite moments. It looks like we’ve
just set up a silly
Canadian hockey joke, but you realize that they’re smarter than
you’ve given them
credit for.
JANICE (on camera)
3:47 p.m.—The town is asking all bulk food deliveries be taken to the Gander
Community
Centre hockey rink. Since hockey’s canceled, the mayor is now calling it…
CLAUDE
The world’s largest walk-in refrigerator!
In Gambo, Kevin T and Kevin J are at the bar.
KEVIN T
It’s hot outside, so we stay in the bar, and make small talk with Matty, the
owner, and his
wife, Brenda—
KEVIN J
We’re not sure how much to say—you just don’t know where the red states
are in a foreign
country, right?
KEVIN T
But we’d been drinking all afternoon and I accidentally say something like,
Kevin and I have
been together for almost five years…
KEVIN J (quickly)
In business. We’ve been together in business. I’m his sexy-tary—His
secretary!
The music stops as everyone looks at them.
KEVIN T
And it feels like the entire bar goes silent—
KEVIN J
And I’m like… Oh god.
KEVIN T
And then Matty says…
MATTY
 62

You’re gay.
KEVIN J
And I’m about to pass out.
KEVIN T
But then Matty says…
MATTY
Well, praise be to God. My daughter’s gay!
KEVIN T
And then Brenda says…
BRENDA
Sure, my sister’s gay—and the woman across the road just ran off with her
best friend!
KEVIN T
And then Brenda’s brother says…
BRENDA’S BROTHER
Our uncle is sixty-eight years old and he just told us he’s a bisexual.
KEVIN T
We somehow ended up in the gayest town in Newfoundland. And Kevin and I
are looking at
each other like—I think I even say, “There must be something in the water.”
And then
Brenda’s brother says…
BRENDA’S BROTHER
That’s why I only drink the beer. 74
74 IRENE: This scene happened almost word for word in Matty and
Brenda’s living
room, except David was explaining about his mom and about our
first writing
endeavor, another true story: My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish Wiccan
Wedding. We
were new to Newfoundland and afraid to “come out” as either
writing a musical
(which some people associate with making fun of a subject) or
telling them the title
to our first one (which sounds like we’re making fun of it, even if it
was a loving
tribute). Either way, we were worried about giving any impression
that we wouldn’t
treat their story respectfully.
In Appleton, Bob is helping Derm.
BOB
Watching the news all day, some of us are starting to lose it. So these people
here, they
decide to have a big cookout for the whole community—just trying to get our
minds off of
everything. And Derm, the mayor of Appleton, says to me…
 63

DERM
Right, m’son, do me a favor and start to round up some grills.
BOB
Round up some grills?
DERM
Yeah, just go to people’s yards and take their grills.
A pause.
BOB
… Take their grills? Someone’s gonna shoot me.
DERM
No, no, no, no, no… Just go to people’s yards and grab their grill.
Another pause.
BOB (to audience)
So, I’m going from yard to yard and the whole time, I keep thinking, someone
is going to
shoot me in the back.
MALE TOWNSPERSON
Hello there!
Bob freezes.
Are you taking my barbecue?
BOB
… This is your barbecue?
MALE TOWNSPERSON
Yeah, buddy.
BOB
Listen, I am so sorry—
MALE TOWNSPERSON
The wife’s got the kettle on, if you want a cuppa.
BOB (to the audience)
I get offered a cup a tea in every single backyard—and most of them offer to
help me steal
their own barbecues. We bring them all over to the community center—no
names on them. I
don’t know how they ever get ’em back. But that’s how we have a big
cookout—completely
free. After that I stop worrying so much about my wallet. 75
75 DAVID: I remember when Tom McKeon first saw his barbecue
story on stage, he
told us, “It’s not funny coming out of my mouth, but when Rodney
says it, it’s
hilarious.”

CUT FROM AWAY

Werner
BALLDESSARINI76
 64

76 DAVID: People often ask us about stories that didn’t make the cut
and there are a
few, but the story of how Byron met his hero, Werner Balldessarini,
is the longest.
Cut at Goodspeed, because the story was so separate from the
others, this never
saw an audience.
BYRON
It starts with a phone call.
A drum starts playing.
BYRON
I’m in my shop in St. John’s. Byron’s Menswear. I’m Byron. Anyway, I get this
phone call
from this guy in Toronto, who I do a little business with. His name is Les
Minion. Les
works for Hugo Boss, and he’s a pretty excitable dude.
The phone rings. Byron picks it up. Les, an excitable dude, enters holding a
phone.
LES
Byron?
BYRON
Yeah, Les.
LES
Where’s Gander?
BYRON
Whadda you mean “where’s Gander”?… It’s a four-hour drive outta town.
LES
… I’ll call you back.
Les exits.
BYRON
So then he calls back.
The phone rings. Byron picks it up. Les enters again.
LES
Byron?
BYRON
Yeah, Les.
LES
Where’s Gander Collegiate?
BYRON
Whaddayou mean “where’s Gander Collegiate”?… It’s in Gander.
LES
… I’ll call you back.
Les exits. Byron sits down.
The phone rings. Byron looks at it. It rings again. He sighs, gets up, and picks
it up.
BYRON
 65

Yeah, Les.
LES
Byron?
BYRON
Yeah, Les.
LES
We need to get a courier. We need a courier. We have to get a courier out to
Gander
Collegiate right away!
We need to get some stuff together and find a courier and get it out there
and—
BYRON
Les.
LES
Yeah?
BYRON
Calm down. First of all, you’re not gonna get a courier on short notice just to
drive to
Gander. It just doesn’t happen. Look. Tell me what’s going on.
LES
Byron, can I trust you?
BYRON
Yes, you can trust me! Who’s in Gander?
LES
Werner Baldessarini.
BYRON
I’m sorry?
LES
Werner Baldessarini is on one of the planes.
BYRON
You’re telling me Werner Baldessarini is in Gander Collegiate.
LES
Yeah.
BYRON
Well, I just became a courier.
I fill up my Mazda Tribute with a bunch of shit and head to Gander. I mean,
the reason I
went out there is that NO ONE in retail gets to meet Werner Baldessarini. I
mean, this is
not your everyday dude.
First of all, he’s not Werner Baldessarini. He’s
WERNER BALDESSARINI.
Werner enters, dressed impeccably, surrounded by fashion models. He
throws money in
the air, pulls out a cigar and lights it. He snaps his fingers flamboyantly and
puts on a pair
 66

of sunglasses.
YOU’VE HEARD OF DOLCE AND GABANA?
VERSACE? RALPH LAUREN? WELL, THEY’RE ALL KIND OF BORIN’
NEXT TO BALDESSARINI
KEN COLE, VALENTINO
JUICE COMPARED TO VINO
THOSE WHO KNOW, KNOW
IT’S BALDESSARINI
HEAD OF HUGO BOSS,
BACK WHEN HUGO BOSS WAS ACTUALLY BOSS
HE CHANGED THE FASHION UNIVERSE—BECAUSE
HE IS A DESIGNER REFINER WHO DEFINED THE FINE WEAR DESIGNS THAT
YOU’LL
FIND ON THE SIGNS THERE IN PARIS
ALL EXCEPT WERNER
WERNER BALDESSARINI
WERNER BALDESSARINI
BYRON
IT’S A FULL-TIME JOB
FITTING FOLKS IN FASHION
AND IT AIN’T NO HOBBY, THIS HERE IS A PASSION
SOME FOLKS WATCH SOAPS
SOME PEOPLE PLAY HOCKEY
THEY’RE A BORE WHEN COMPARED TO DIOR AND VERSACE
P. ELLIS, MIZRAHI, HUSSEIN CHALAYAN
VALENTINO, AND KENNETH, BILL BLASS, AND
VUITTON
DKNY, MARC JACOBS, AND YVES ST. LAURENT
THEY’RE A YAWN ONCE YOU TRY ON
BALDESSARINI
SUAVE AND RICH TO BOOT
THINK OF JAMES BOND, BUT WITH BETTER SUITS
OR THINK OF DON JUAN, BUT THE POINT IS MOOT
BECAUSE
WHATEVER YOU THINK OF THE MAN IS A MAN WHO COMMANDS THE PLANS
OF
EVERY MODEL IN MILAN
ALL EXCEPT WERNER
WERNER BALDESSARINI
WERNER BALDESSARINI
BYRON
FASHION AND PASSION AND STYLISH SUCCESS
HE REPRESENTS CONFIDENCE FROM HIS BRIEFS TO HIS VEST
HIS COLLECTION’S PERFECTION AND NOW THERE’S A FRAGRANCE
THAT SMELLS LIKE A MAN WHO DOESN’T SMELL LIKE THE REST
ULTRA-LIGHT SILK SUITS, HALF-LINED KNICKERS
 67

BOMBER JACKETS IN LEATHER, AND BLAZERS IN CASHMERE

WE ARE IN A FERRARI WITH A MARTINI
YELLING, I’M MEETING
BALLDESARINI!
ALL EXCEPT WERNER
WERNER BALDESSARINI
WERNER BALDESSARINI
I get there about seven-thirty that evening. I go into the school and head up
to the office.
An exhausted Beulah enters.
BEULAH
Can I help you?
BYRON
Yeah. I’m looking for
WERNER BALDESSARINI
BEULAH
I’m sorry?
BYRON
I’m looking for
WERNER BALDESSARINI
BEULAH
Werner Baldessarini?
BYRON
No—
WERNER BALDESSARINI
BEULAH
… Right.
She speaks into the intercom microphone nasally.
BEULAH
Werner Balchessini, please report to the front desk.
She exits.
BYRON
Now, I’ve seen lots of pictures of Werner—in catalogs—brochures—annual
reports, you
know. But this was different—this was seeing him in the flesh. Perfectly
coifed silver hair,
polished shoes, gold rings, a suit that I can’t even afford to sell, much less
even own.
Figure he’s wearing his Black selection tailored line. Probably Salvatore
Ferragamo.
Werner enters in shorts and a T-shirt.
BYRON
Instead he’s wearing… Walmart?
WERNER
Hey. You the guy?
BYRON
 68

Mr. Baldessarini—I’m Byron Murphy—it’s an honor. I run Byron’s in St. John’s

—you
probably never heard of it, but… what are you wearing?
WERNER
I have no idea. The people here donated everything—no one has a change of
clothes,
so…
BYRON
Well, as I was saying—it’s a real honor, Mr. Baldess-
WERNER
It’s Werner. Nice to meet you.
BYRON
Werner. Cool.
WERNER
You have the stuff?
BYRON
We go out to my car and I open the trunk to show him the stuff.
WERNER
You can’t bring this in there.
BYRON
I’m sorry?
WERNER
You can’t bring this in there.
BYRON
The trunk was packed with—Les Minion had told me to pick up some cheese
and crackers
and chocolate and caviar. I brought some clothes—different lines—some
briefs and
socks. They were going to reimburse me anyway.
WERNER
Listen, we’re getting looked after terrifically here—and we’ve got more than
enough to eat
and drink. I mean, dude, that’s an insult.
BYRON (to the audience)
Werner Baldessarini says “dude.”
WERNER
Look—give it to your customers when you get home. You’re getting
reimbursed, right?
BYRON
Yeah. This stuff—there’s this guy in Toronto—Les Minion. This stuff was his
idea.
WERNER
I’ll take the underwear, though. So tell me about your store.
BYRON (to audience)
So there I was. Hanging out behind the school with one of the most
influential men in the
 69

history of the fashion industry. But that’s the thing. He was just a genuine
dude, right? The
next day I’m back in St. John’s and had a big “Customer Appreciation Day”
with cheese
and crackers and chocolate and caviar. That’s what I learned that day—
under even the
best suits in the world—when something like this happens—we’re all just
regular dudes.

Bigger
PROBLEMS

JANICE (on camera)

8:45 a.m.
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE)
Thursday.
JANICE (on camera)
September 13. We’ve got a… situation down at Gander Academy.
At the Academy, Beulah and Annette address everyone.
BEULAH
Ladies and Gentlemen. We have an indelicate request. We need volunteers
to help clean
the bathrooms. As you can imagine, with seven hundred adults in a primary
school…
BEULAH (CONT’D)
Health Canada needs us to clean them every hour and a half and we just
don’t have the
people. So, we’re asking for your help.
A pause as everyone looks away.
ANNETTE
But no one volunteers.
BEULAH
No one comes. And we’re run off our feet with everything else. And then—
ANNETTE
Sweet Jesus in the garden.
This line of men comes walking down the hall.
Six men in doctor coats walk toward her in a slow-motion burlesque.
Annette’s jaw drops.
ANNETTE
The top six cardiologists from all over the world. On their way to a
conference. 77
77 DAVID: Like most details in the script, this actually happened,
and several of the
cardiologists have now visited the show. The doctors knew that if
the bathrooms
 70

weren’t properly cleaned, it could lead to health problems. The

teachers at Gander
Academy were clearly all very excited about a group of men who
knew the
importance of cleanliness. “The most educated men were cleaning
the toilets,” they
excitedly told us. But we took it to another level by putting it in
Annette’s fantasy world. Also,
the red gloves were found by googling “Canadian cleaning gloves,”
and they have yellow flowers on the inside
that no one ever sees.
Highly qualified cardiologists.
And they know about the importance of cleanliness.
HEAD CARDIOLOGIST
If we don’t get these bathrooms clean, we’re going to have… bigger
problems.
The cardiologists exit. 78
78 IRENE: When Lin-Manuel Miranda came to the show, he
commented on how few
buttons we put on the end of songs—and therefore how few
applause points there
were. Chris did that on purpose to maintain the audience’s
connection with the
story, limiting applause to four moments: after “Welcome to the
Rock,” after
“Screech-In,” at the end of the show, and here, where we are often
literally unable to
stop the clapping. People really want to applaud sexy cardiologists.

I am HERE

BEULAH
Anyway, I get lunch set up, labeling anything that’ll go bad with the date and
time, I let the
pants out for one of the pilots who’s been enjoying our cooking. I make a
balloon animal for
a crying toddler—and then I check on Hannah, talking to anyone she can
reach.
Elsewhere, Hannah puts the phone to her ear.
HANNAH
I AM HERE—I AM HERE ON AN ISLAND 79
79 IRENE: This song was the last one that was added. Chris had been
asking for
“more” from Hannah since La Jolla, but we were always hesitant
since we hadn’t
 71

met her in person yet. Finally, just before Christmas 2017, we were
invited to spend a
Sunday with Hannah and her now late husband, Dennis, and the rest
of their family,
touring the places in town that honored their son Kevin O’Rourke. In
our final
moments before having to leave, we joined some carolers in a park
across from the
train station—and suddenly a fire engine came roaring up and Santa
Claus jumped
out, giving our daughter a fuzzy white bear. “I am Here” was written
shortly after.
HANNAH (CONT’D) (on the phone)
HELLO? HELLO. IT’S ME AGAIN
YEAH, MY SON. HE’S WITH RESCUE TWO
ANY NEWS?
I AM HIS MOTHER
I’M FAR AWAY—STUCK HERE
I’M TRYING TO FIND OUT IF—
FINE—I’LL HOLD AGAIN (putting the phone down)
I SHOULD BE DOWN THERE
AND CHECKING THE HOSPITALS
PUTTING UP SIGNS
DOING SOMETHING!
INSTEAD
I AM HERE—I AM HERE IN CANADA (on the phone)
I AM TELLING YOU—LISTEN
MY SON, HE TAKES RISKS
HE’S NOT MISSING—HE’S HELPING OR HURT
HE’LL GET OUT OF THIS
YES, I’LL KEEP TRYING
AND YES, HERE’S THE NUMBER
AND YES, AT THE GRADE SCHOOL
IN GANDER—I’LL BE HERE (hanging up the phone)
I SHOULD BE THERE WHEN IT’S OVER AND DONE
WHEN HE COMES THROUGH THE DOOR
AND SAYS, “I’M HOME, MOM”
I SHOULD BE THERE FOR MY SON
BUT INSTEAD
I AM HERE
I AM HERE
BEULAH
She leaves message after message for her son—until there’s no more room
on his
answering machine.
HANNAH 80 81
 72

ALL I KNOW
IS YOU ARE THERE
YOU ARE THERE
AND I AM HERE
80 DAVID: Q. Smith is a hero for learning this song while she was
recording it. We
would literally be changing lyrics and passing her Post-it Notes
between takes. And
she debuted it for the first time on Broadway.
81 IRENE: When Hannah first saw the show, we sat on either side of
her with her
family in the second row of the theater. She held our hands so
tightly. It meant so
much that she chose us to sit with her. Almost more than any other
person we
interviewed, her support and the support of her family and
community of first
responders has meant the world to us.
BEULAH
She finally got some news.
HANNAH
They said it was Kev’s day off—but someone else said there were more men
down there
than were scheduled. I should be looking for him. He’s always there for me—
trying to make
me laugh. Tells me stupid jokes. He loves jokes—tells them to the kids at the
firehouse,
while he fixes their bikes.
I should be there.
BEULAH
I know there’s nothing I can do to help. But I do know a few jokes. There was
a sailor who
was stationed in the South Pacific, far away from his wife who he’d just
married. And when
he was away, he wrote her a letter. He said, “We’re going to be apart for a
long time—and
this island is full of young, attractive local girls. I need something to take my
mind off them.”
So his wife sends him an accordion and says, “Why don’t you learn to play
this then?” So
finally, he comes home from his tour of duty and says to his wife, “I can’t
wait to get you
into bed.” And she says, “First let’s see how well you play that accordion.” 82
82 IRENE: The real Beulah is also a wonderful joke teller—though
some were a little
 73

too risqué to include in our show. The only other person I know who
tells jokes like
Beulah is Astrid Van Wieran. Cut from the same cloth, just like
Beulah and Hannah.
SHE laughs at her own joke, but sees HANNAH’s face and stops.
HANNAH
That was a really stupid joke
A pause.
Tell me another one.
KEVIN T
Everywhere you look, there are people from around the globe. Going back
and forth for
phones—or showers. Grabbing something from Shoppers. I’m getting coffee
at a gas
station on the main drag—and suddenly the entire place goes quiet…
Everyone on stage stands still. Kevin turns around, looking.
And nobody moves. Even the people outside are standing still. And I look up
at the TVs and
realize—it’s a national moment of silence in America. And all of these
Newfoundlanders—
these people from another country—they maintain that moment of silence. I
don’t know if
that would happen back home—at a busy gas station on the main drag—but
it happened
here.
HANNAH
Beulah walks me to church—and when we get there, I light a candle for my
son.
BEULAH
And I do too.
KEVIN T
I suddenly realized what that music was from my dream—it was an old hymn
from when I
was a kid. Now, I haven’t been to church in years, but for some reason that
song was in my
head.

Prayer

KEVIN T
MAKE ME A CHANNEL OF YOUR PEACE 83
WHERE THERE IS HATRED, LET ME BRING YOUR LOVE,
WHERE THERE IS INJURY, YOUR PARDON, LORD,
AND WHERE THERE’S DOUBT, TRUE FAITH IN YOU.
83 DAVID: When Kevin Tuerff first saw the second Sheridan
workshop, he couldn’t
 74

believe we included this song. “I’ve never told anyone that it was
running through
my head,” he said. Maybe it was because we’d interviewed him for
hours, but he’d
told us.
HANNAH
MAKE ME A CHANNEL OF YOUR PEACE
WHERE THERE’S DESPAIR IN LIFE,
LET ME BRING HOPE,
WHERE THERE IS DARKNESS,
ONLY LIGHT,
AND WHERE THERE’S SADNESS,
EVER JOY
KEVIN T
MAKE ME A CHANNEL OF YOUR PEACE
WHERE THERE’S DESPAIR IN LIFE,
LET ME BRING HOPE
WHERE THERE IS DARKNESS,
ONLY LIGHT,
EVER JOY
RABBI
OSEH SHALOM BIM’ROMAV
HU YA’ASEH SHALOM ALEINU
V’AL KOL YISRAEL
V’IMRU, V’IMRU AMEN
RABBI (CONT.)
There is a man here in town. He’s lived here nearly his entire life. He heard
that there was a
rabbi diverted here and he came to find me and tell me his story.
EDDIE
I was born in Poland, I think. And my parents—they were Jews—they sent me
here before
the war started—I still remember some prayers they taught me. As a boy, I
was told I
should never tell anyone that I was Jewish—even my wife. But after what
happened on
Tuesday—so many stories gone—just like that. I needed to tell someone.
ALI
During El-Fagir, when most people are asleep, it is easier to pray. But at
Dhuhr, I can feel
them watching me. Sometimes I catch them when they think I’m not looking
—and I can see
the fear in their eyes. 84
84 IRENE: The character of Ali is inspired by at least five people,
some through
 75

second-hand reports, some through interviews, and our friend Amal,

a Muslim
woman that we went to baby class with, who taught us how to pray.
ANNETTE
Excuse me? Beulah wanted me to check on you. The library’s open—for
anyone looking for
some peace—and a quiet place to pray. 85
85 IRENE: One of the women Annette is based on also offered a
Muslim man a mat
for his knees, but we couldn’t include it. It was such a nice thing to
do, people had
trouble believing it was real. There were a number of stories that
were so “nice” that
we couldn’t include them for that same reason. What a strange
world we live in.
Ali lays out a prayer mat and begins to pray.
RABBI & EDDIE (Eddie sings hesitantly)
YA’ASEH SHALOM (YA’ASEH)
YA’ASEH SHALOM (SHALOM)
SHALOM ALEINU V’AL KOL YISRAEL
RABBI & EDDIE
YA’ASEH SHALOM
(YA’ASEH)
YA’ASEH SHALOM
(SHALOM)
SHALOM ALEINU
V’AL KOL YISRAEL
OSEH SHALOM
BIM’ ROMAV
HU YA’ASEH
SHALOM
ALEINU
V’AL KOL YISRAEL
V’IMRU AMEN
HINDU PASSENGERS
ASATO MAA
SAD-GAMAYA
TAMASO MAA JYOTIRE-GAMAYA
TAMASO MAA JYOTIRE-GAMAYA
MRITYOR-MAAMRITAN
GAMAYA
OM SHAANTIH SHAANTIH SHAANTIH
BEULAH, HANNAH,
KEVIN T & 10
O MASTER, GRANT THAT I MAY NEVER SEEK
SO MUCH TO BE CONSOLED AS TO CONSOLE;
 76

TO BE UNDERSTOOD AS TO UNDERSTAND,
TO BE LOVED, AS TO LOVE WITH ALL MY SOUL
ALI
Allahu Akbar
Subbhaan Rabbi al Azeem
Allahu Akbar
Subhaan Rabbia Al-Aala’a
Allahu Akbar
Alhamdulilah
PASSENGERS 1 & 6
YA’ASEH SHALOM
YA’ASEH
SHALOM
SHALOM 86
86 DAVID: Making the prayers of the world work together in
harmony was a huge
amount of work; however, like a metaphor for religions finding
common ground, the
effort was well worth it.
KEVIN T
MAKE ME A CHANNEL OF YOUR PEACE
WHERE THERE’S DESPAIR IN LIFE, LET ME BRING HOPE
WHERE THERE IS DARKNESS, ONLY LIGHT
AND WHERE THERE’S SADNESS, EVER JOY

ON the EDGE

Actor 8 makes animal noises.

BONNIE
Health Canada finally lets the animals off and quarantines them to Hangar
One. It’s a big
room with cats and dogs and chimpanzees, and there’s barking, meowing—
and then the
chimps start imitating the dogs, and they’re barking too. The phones are
ringing off the hook
with people who want to see their pets…
DOUG
… But they’re not allowed anywhere near the planes.
BONNIE
And I’m worried about Unga, the pregnant Bonobo. All animals are affected
badly by stress
—not just humans.
CLAUDE
Some people spend their days crammed inside—shoulder to shoulder with
nothing to do but
watch the news and wait for something to happen.
 77

ALL
ON THE EDGE 87
87 DAVID: Working on the script, we were always asked to find more
tension—but
since everyone worked so well together, tension was really hard to
find or was often
quickly overcome, like a bomb scare which turned out just to be a
mistaken bottle of
vodka. This section was originally a song called “Let’s Go Out,” but
then Irene
thought of calling back the early “On The Edge” (and “Blankets and
Bedding”) lyrics
and then progressively building them word by word, so the lyrics
are literally “on the
edge,” like the characters.
BEULAH
We’ve got the TVs going 24/7 in the cafeteria. And the more they watch, the
more scared
and angry they get.
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE
OZ
Some of the plane people haven’t slept in three days. None of us have either
—and we’re
jumping at our own shadows.
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE WORLD
BEULAH
Around suppertime on Thursday, people are waiting to use the phones/ and
there’s a fight in
the hallway—
ALI (on the phone)
Ana Kwayiss Alhamdulliallah. El aakl hena helw awi. Hagga Faw’a el wassif.
Lekin, (pause)
fee ness, fee naass kateera hena, Be-yeboosooly akinyIrtakept gereema. 88
88 Translation: I am well, thanks be to God. The food here is very
good. It is
incredible. But, there are people, there are a lot of people here.
They look at me as if
I have committed a crime.
PASSENGER 11 (to Ali, interrupting him)
Hey. Hey! What the hell are you saying?
ALI (putting his hand over the phone)
I beg your pardon?
PASSENGER 11
You celebrating this? You praying for your friends?
 78

ALI (into the phone again)

MaaMa, Laazim ‘afil el sikha delwaa’ty—salaam. Bahibik— 89
89 Translation: I have to go now—bye. I love you—
PASSENGER 11 (to PASSENGER 8)
Why doesn’t he speak English?
ALI
Excuse me?
PASSENGER 8
You telling your Muslim friends where to bomb next?
ALI
This was not all Muslims! And I was not—
PASSENGER 11
Go back where you came from! 90
90 IRENE: We were told several stories of tensions and Islamophobia
that arose while
watching the news. One host witnessed an argument in their living
room between
two American passengers, one who blamed Muslims and one who
was Muslim. The
Muslim told her, “It’s not all Muslims.” Another Muslim man at
Gander Academy
stayed to himself, uneasy that he would be blamed, until he finally
unveiled a granite
plaque that he presented to the school as thanks. All of this
informed Ali’s character
and added to what the Newfoundlanders had to overcome.
MUSLIM PASSENGER
I’m Muslim and I was born in Connecticut!
BEULAH
She’s an American citizen.
PASSENGER 11 (to PASSENGER 2)
She don’t look American.
PASSENGER 1
I’ve got a family to protect.
MUSLIM PASSENGER
What does that even mean?
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
They should question all you people!
BEULAH
Sir, stop it! Everyone calm down!
PASSENGER 6
You can relax!
PASSENGER 8
I’m not waiting ’til you do!
ALI
We haven’t done anything!
 79

PASSENGER 10
They haven’t done anything!
PASSENGER 11
What did you say? The bible says an eye for an eye! An eye for an eye!
PASSENGER 12
Leave him alone!
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE WORLD OR WHEREVER WE ARE
2, 4, 5, 7, 9 & 10
WE ARE—WE ARE—WE ARE ON THE EDGE
I NEED TO DO SOMETHING
TO KEEP ME FROM THINKING OF ALL
OF THOSE SCENES ON THE TUBE
NO I CAN’T WATCH THE NEWS ANYMORE
ON THE EDGE
1, 3, 6, 8, 11 & 12
WE ARE—WE ARE—WE ARE ON THE
IS THERE SOMETHING
I NEED SOMETHING TO DO—CAUSE I CAN’T WATCH THE NEWS
NO I CAN’T WATCH THE NEWS ANYMORE
ON THE EDGE
CLAUDE
The FAA keeps delaying opening the airspace—and here on the ground, we’re
dealing with
a whole mess of other problems.
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE
BEVERLEY
Some of the planes are parked on a runway where the surface is all torn up.
That debris
gets into an engine and they’ll never leave.
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE WORLD
DOUG
One of the big planes—a triple 7—is sinking into the asphalt. If we don’t do
something,
she’ll be stuck here forever.
ALL
ON THE EDGE OF THE WORLD OR WHEREVER WE ARE
WE ARE—WE ARE—WE ARE ON THE
ARE—WE ARE—WE ARE—WE ARE ON THE EDGE!
JANICE
I interview a woman from Queens—a mother. Her son is a firefighter and they
still can’t
account for him. She starts crying and I start crying too. And I can’t stop
shaking. I don’t
 80

know if I can do this anymore.

BEVERLEY
I check in with air traffic control again and it’s more bad news. Not only is the
airspace still
closed, but there’s a storm headed for Newfoundland. Hurricane Erin is
making landfall by
tomorrow or the day after. If we don’t get these planes in the air soon, no
one’s going
anywhere.
In the mayor’s office.
OZ
Claude, people are starting to crack.
CLAUDE
Let’s get everyone down to the Legion.
At the academy.
KEVIN T
Everyone’s going down to the Legion for a drink.
KEVIN J
Hi, have you seen my boyfriend? His name is Kevin, he’s about that tall, and
he’s lost his
mind.
KEVIN T
I just want to go out!
KEVIN J
Well, I don’t!
KEVIN T
Well, I’m not going without you.
KEVIN J
Well, I’m not… staying for a long time.
KEVIN T
One drink!
KEVIN J
One drink!
In the phone room.
BEULAH
Hannah? Everyone’s going out tonight.
HANNAH
You go on without me, Beulah… I need to wait by the phone.
BEULAH
… I’ll wait with you
At the hotel.
BEVERLEY
I keep waiting to hear from the airline. So I’ll just be here by the phone, Tom,
if the kids
want to speak with me.
In the hangar.
 81

DOUG
Bonnie? I know you’re not leaving the animals, so I brought you some chili.
But I really think
that tonight, you should come home and get some sleep…
Bonnie runs on.
BONNIE
Doug! Oh my—Get in here! We are about to have the first rare Bonobo
chimpanzee born in
Newfoundland!
At the academy.
OZ
Beulah! They need some food down at the Legion if you can spare any.
ALI
Miss Beulah. Please let me help with the food.
BEULAH
No, m’love. You’re a guest—
ALI
Please. I am a master chef for an international hotel chain. I oversee
restaurants around the
world. I would like to help with the food. 91
91 DAVID: Brian Mosher talks about how Chef Vikram Garg, who Ali
is partially
inspired by, finally was let into the kitchen and in about a second
with one hand, he
had created the most beautiful fruit salad Brian had ever seen.
BEULAH
Get in there!
Beulah gestures emphatically toward the kitchen as Ali runs in, exasperated.
DIANE
Everyone’s going out to the bar—and Nick is going.
NICK
I’m going if Diane is going.

Heave AWAY

DIANE
And I think, nobody here knows me—I can be whoever I want to be…
BOB
I’m not worried about my wallet. I’m not worried about getting shot. I am a
little worried
about how much Irish whiskey I’m drinking…
Everyone enters the bar excitedly.
OZ
By eight o’clock the bar is completely packed with people from around the
world.
 82

Everybody’s talking about where they’re staying and what they’ve seen—and
the bar staff
keep making runs for more beer and liquor. After an hour, people are
swimming in the river
out back. And no, no one brought their swim trunks!
A couple of the local b’ys get up with their accordions and fiddles—and
someone brings out
an ugly stick. 92
92 DAVID: The Ugly Stick has passed through many hands. As our
honorary
Newfoundlander, it started with Petrina. It then made its way to
Jenn Colella, and
ultimately ended up with our bodhran player, Romano.
The band joins in as the locals start to dance.
MEN
FAREWELL TO ALL YOU PRETTY LADIES 93
WAVING FROM THE DOCK
HEAVE AWAY, ME JOLLIES, HEAVE AWAY
AND IF WE DO RETURN TO YOU
WE’LL MAKE YOUR CRADLES ROCK
HEAVE AWAY, ME JOLLY BOYS, WE’RE ALL BOUND AWAY
93 IRENE: This moment was partially inspired by Dan Pardo, our
music director at
Goodspeed, who took us all out for a night of sea shanties nearby at
one of the
oldest pubs in America. At the start of each rehearsal, Dan would
teach the cast new
sea shanties, partially to remind them this was rowdier and rougher
than traditional
musical theater.
WOMEN
FAREWELL, YOU NEWFOUNDLANDER BOYS
YOU’RE LEAVING US ALONE
HEAVE AWAY, ME JOLLIES, HEAVE AWAY
AND IF YOU FIND ANOTHER
WE’VE GOT LOVERS OF OUR OWN
ALL
HEAVE AWAY, ME JOLLY BOYS, WE’RE ALL BOUND AWAY 94
94 DAVID: Several bands were on the diverted planes, including a
Beatles tribute
band and a heavy-metal throat singing band (their lead singer was
probably the
farthest person we interviewed in Tuva just south of Russia.)So this
section used to
have a huge Beatles mashup of all their hits, with a throat singer
joining in on “Back
 83

in the U.S.S.R.”; however, our producers wisely pointed out that

licensing every
Beatles song might be cost prohibitive, so we now happily have
“Heave Away” in its
place.
OZ
And then we get the karaoke going.
DELORES
NEAR… FAR…
ALL
WHEREVER WE ARE!
Everyone cheers.
OZ
Then we decide to have a bit of a ceremony.
CLAUDE
Let’s make these people honorary Newfoundlanders!

SCREECH In

CLAUDE
NOW THERE’S A SOLEMN, OLD TRADITION
FOR ADMISSION—OR AUDITION—TO TRANSITION
FROM A COME-FROM-AWAY 95
95 IRENE: When we first met Beulah Cooper, she invited us to the
Legion that night,
to be Screeched-in next to Nick, Diane, Beverley, and her husband,
Tom, all
officiated by Claude. Probably not how most writers find the
subjects for their plays.
ALL
TO BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
CLAUDE
THE ONLY OTHER WAY AT ANY RATE
IS PASS AWAY AND PRAY TO FATE AND WAIT
TO REINCARNATE
ALL
AS A NEWFOUNDLANDER
HEY HEY—COME ON INSIDE
NOTHING VENTURED, NOTHING TRIED
LOCAL 5
ONLY A COUPLE PEOPLE CRIED
ALL
YOU’LL BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
HEY HEY—SIT DOWN RIGHT HERE
YOU’LL FEEL BETTER IN A YEAR
OZ
 84

TRY TO IGNORE YOUR DOUBTS AND FEARS

ALL
AND YOU’LL BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
CLAUDE
Now we needs a couple volunteers! Who wants to become a
Newfoundlander?
BOB
Right here!
CLAUDE
Good man! Who else?
KEVIN T
I have no idea why I put up my hand. Kevin’s like…
KEVIN J
Ohmygod are you serious?
Kevin T tries to dance a jig.
Ohmygod—you are serious.
KEVIN T
Yes—I’m serious. Don’t do it if you don’t want to.
KEVIN J
I won’t.
CLAUDE
Where you from, Buddy?
KEVIN T
Los Angeles.
CLAUDE
LA! Who else?
DIANE
Us!
DIANE
We want to be Newfoundlanders!
NICK
Actually, I’m not sure—I don’t like performing…
CLAUDE
Alright, then. Where are you folks from?
DIANE
Texas and—
CLAUDE
Texas! (to Nick) What part of Texas are you from, buddy?
NICK
No. I’m/ from—
DIANE
I’m from Texas. He’s from England.
CLAUDE
Well, wait. Now how does that work?
NICK
How does what work?
 85

CLAUDE
How does your marriage work with you being in England and her in Texas?
DIANE
No—we’re not married.
NICK
No—
CLAUDE
Oh, I’m sorry—I just assumed you were married… Well, would you like to be?
NICK
Ah—
DIANE
Well, why not?!
NICK
Diane had had two beers by then, so it was probably the alcohol talking.
DIANE
I’ve never had more than one beer at a time before, so it was probably the
alcohol talking.
NICK
I went and got us two more beers.
CLAUDE
NOW THE FIRST PART IS THE EASIEST
CLAUDE (CONT’D)
WE’LL SOON GET TO THE QUEASIEST
I’LL NEED YOU TO REPEAT THIS MESS
ALL
WHEN YOU BECOME A NEWFOUNDLANDER
CLAUDE
CAUSE WE SPEAKS A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE, SON
WE ADDS SOME ESSES AND SOME RUM
YOU’LL HAVE TO TRY A GOOD COD TONGUE
ALL
WHEN YOU BECOME A NEWFOUNDLANDER
HEY HEY—JUST DO YOUR BEST
NOTHING SCARY—NOTHING YET
JANICE
YOU’LL HAVE TO CHANGE THE WAY YOU’RE DRESSED
ALL
AND YOU’LL BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
HEY HEY—JUST SING ALONG
NOTHING VENTURED, JUST PROLONGED
CLAUDE
THERE’S THIRTY VERSES IN THIS SONG 96
96 DAVID: This is a tongue-in-cheek reference to Newfoundland
songs, which
occasionally feel like they have thirty verses. Of course, many were
fishing songs
 86

used to tell stories and keep sailors rowing, so it makes sense and I
love them—
though it works less well in a Broadway musical.
ALL
THEN YOU’LL BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
CLAUDE
Ladies and Gentlemen. This is Screech. 97 Back in World War II, an officer
was stationed
here and was offered some of this stuff. All the locals were tossing it back
with nar’ a
quiver, so he does too, and lets out an ear-piercing…
97 DAVID: In another bizarre bit of life imitating art, the bottles of
Screech in
Newfoundland now sport a sticker saying, “The official drink of
Come From Away.”
Claude and all the Locals howl.
Everybody comes to see what’s happened and says—
ALL (EXCEPT SCREECHEES)
“What was that ungodly screech?!”
CLAUDE
And now it’s your turn. Are you ready?
NICK
Um… I’m not sure that—
DIANE
Wait—did you just say—
BOB
No. Nope. Not really ready.
KEVIN T
Do we have to drink this?
CLAUDE
Good! All together now. One!
ALL (EXCEPT SCREECHEES & CLAUDE)
ONE!
CLAUDE
Two!
ALL (EXCEPT SCREECHEES & CLAUDE)
TWO!
CLAUDE
Three!
ALL (EXCEPT SCREECHEES & CLAUDE)
THREE!
CLAUDE
Down the hatch!
Everyone cheers as they drink. Bob howls. Nick grimaces. Kevin T shakes his
head.
Diane taps her glass, getting every drop out.
 87

KEVIN T
Screech is basically bad Jamaican rum.
NICK
Screech is horrific.
DIANE
Screech is delishush!
BOB
And then they brought the Cod. 98 99
98 IRENE: Like any proper Screech-in, this scene originally included
several
additional steps, including eating caplin, bologna, and peppermints,
while repeating
the lines, “Up the Harbour down the shore” and “Long May your Big
Jib draw.”
99 DAVID: There’s a very distinct two-note phrase repeated under
the next four lines
to underscore this sudden threat from the sea.
KEVIN T
The Cod.
NICK
The Cod.
DIANE
The Cod.
A codfish is brought out and handed to Claude.
CLAUDE
NOW WITH EVERY TRANSFORMATION
COMES A TINY BIT OF RISK
YOU’VE GOT TO WALK THE PLANK
AND THERE’LL BE BLOOD OR THERE’LL BE BLISS
AND IT’S THE SAME TO BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
EVERY PERSON’S WISH
SO DON’T BE DUMB
JUST TAKE THE PLUNGE
GO ON—KISS THE FISH!
NEWFOUNDLANDERS (continued underneath, building steadily)
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER…
CLAUDE
Ladies and Gentlemen—this is a genuine freshly caught Newfoundland Cod—
and if you
want to become an honorary Newfoundlander, you’ll have to give her a
smooch!
Bob kisses the fish and cheers.
CLAUDE
One!
KEVIN J
 88

If you kiss that, I will never kiss you again!

KEVIN T
I’ll risk it!
Kevin T kisses the fish. Kevin J exits.
CLAUDE
Two!
NICK
I’m not kissing a fish!
DIANE
Come on, I will if you will!
NICK
Oh my god. Fine.
Nick kisses the fish and grimaces.
CLAUDE
Three!
DIANE
I can’t do it. 100
100 DAVID: Diane’s fear of kissing the fish is actually based on Irene.
When we were
first Screeched-in, Irene could not bring herself to kiss the cod. To
be fair, it’s far
more disgusting than you can imagine, freshly caught and dripping.
After failing to
persuade her, Claude eventually said, “You can either kiss the fish
or you can kiss
me.” Irene promptly kissed the mayor. At our introductory interview,
I said, “Hi, I’m
David, and you’ve already kissed my wife.”
NICK
What? I just did!
CLAUDE
Now you gotta kiss the cod—it’s a vital part of the ceremony.
DIANE
No! I can’t do it!
CLAUDE
Alright—look here. I’ll make you a deal. Either you kiss this fish—or else you
kiss this
Englishman that you’re not married to.
NICK
Wait… what?
DIANE
Okay.
Diane kisses him.
ALL
HEY HEY—COME ON TONIGHT
TAKE A RISK AND TAKE A RIDE
 89

JUMP RIGHT IN WITH BOTH FEET TIED

AND YOU’LL BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
HEY HEY—COME ON ONCE MORE
NOTHING VENTURED, NOTHING SORE
AFTER IT’S OVER, OUT THE DOOR
AND YOU’LL BE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
CLAUDE
AFTER IT’S OVER YOU’LL REMEMBER
ALL
THAT YOU’RE A NEWFOUNDLANDER
The band kicks in again 101, as everyone trails out of the bar. 102
101 DAVID: At one point, there were lyrics to this playoff, including
the line, “HEY
HEY, WE ALL CUT LOOSE / NOW YOU’VE GOT TO KISS A MOOSE.”
102 IRENE: Originally, there was an intermission here. Our producers
suggested we
cut it since no one in Gander was able to take a break.
CLAUDE
Good job, LA!
OZ
Goodnight now!
KEVIN T
Kevin? Where’d you go? Kevin?

ME and the SKY

BEVERLEY sits alone in her hotel room, wide awake.

BEVERLEY 103
103 DAVID: Like so much of the show, this song draws directly from
our verbatim
interviews. We spoke to Beverley Bass for hours on the morning of
September 11,
2011, and afterward we were ready to make Beverley Bass: The
Musical! Here are
some quotes from our interview to show how closely they relate.
MY PARENTS MUST HAVE THOUGHT
THEY HAD A CRAZY KID 104
104 “I was one of those kids that told their parents early on. I was
about eight when I
told them that I wanted to be a pilot. They thought they had a crazy
kid on their
hands.”
CAUSE I WAS ONE OF THOSE KIDS
WHO ALWAYS KNEW WHAT I WANTED
THEY TOOK ME DOWN TO THE AIRPORT
TO SEE ALL THE PLANES DEPARTING
 90

WATCHING THEM FLY SOMETHING INSIDE OF ME WAS STARTING

I WAS EIGHT WHEN I TOLD THEM
THAT I’D BE A PILOT
BUT I WAS TOO YOUNG AND TOO SHORT
AND THERE WERE NO FEMALE CAPTAINS
AND MY DAD SAID BE PATIENT
HE SAID JUST SEE WHAT HAPPENS
BUT I TOOK MY FIRST LESSON
CAME DOWN FROM THE SKY AND
TOLD MY FATHER I’D FLY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE 105
105 “I came home from my first flying lesson—I remember walking in
the kitchen—
and I told my mother, I said, ‘I’ll fly for the rest of my life.’ ”
AND I GOT MY FIRST JOB
FLYING FOR A MORTICIAN
IN A TINY BONANZA
JUST A CORPSE AND ME
FIVE DOLLARS AN HOUR
FOR FLYING DEAD BODIES
I HAD TO CLIMB OVER THEIR FACES
JUST TO GET TO MY SEAT 106
106 “My first flying job was flying bodies for a mortician. So, I flew
dead bodies—the
airplane was a very small Bonanza… I climb over their face to get to
my seat. Five
dollars an hour. And they don’t complain.”

AND SUDDENLY THE WHEELS LIFT OFF

THE GROUND IS FALLING BACKWARD
I AM SUDDENLY ALIVE
SUDDENLY I’M IN THE COCKPIT
SUDDENLY EVERYTHING’S CHANGED
SUDDENLY I’M NOT TOO YOUNG OR TOO SHORT
AND THE PASSENGERS IN THE BACK DON’T COMPLAIN
SUDDENLY I’M FLYING COMPANY CHARTERS
SUDDENLY EVERYTHING’S HIGH
SUDDENLY THERE’S NOTHING IN BETWEEN
ME AND THE SKY
AMERICAN AIRLINES
HAD THE PRETTIEST PLANES 107
107 “I only applied to American because I thought they had the
prettiest airplanes.”
SO I APPLIED AS A FLIGHT ENGINEER
BUT THE WORLD WAR II PILOTS, THEY ALL COMPLAINED
THEY SAID, “GIRLS SHOULDN’T BE IN THE COCKPIT—HEY LADY, HEY BABY,
HEY, WHY DON’T YOU GRAB
 91

US A DRINK?”
AND THE FLIGHT ATTENDANTS
WEREN’T MY FRIENDS
BACK THEN
AND THEY SAID, “ARE YOU BETTER THAN US, DO YOU THINK?”
BUT I KEPT GETTING HIRED AND
THE WORLD WAR II CREW—THEY RETIRED 108
108 “As the World War II guys started retiring… the generation that
was behind me
was more familiar with women pilots.”
AND THE GIRLS ALL THOUGHT MUCH HIGHER OF ME
The women become flight attendants, clapping and singing backup.
1986—THE FIRST FEMALE AMERICAN CAPTAIN IN HISTORY 109
109 “I was the first female captain on American in October 1986… I
had the first all
female crew… it made headlines all over the world.”
BEVERLEY (WITH FLIGHT ATTENDANTS)
SUDDENLY I’M IN THE COCKPIT (AH)
SUDDENLY I’VE GOT MY WINGS (AH)
SUDDENLY ALL OF THOSE PILOTS PROTESTING ME (AH)
WELL, THEY CAN GET THEIR OWN DRINKS!
SUDDENLY THERE’S NO ONE SAYING STAY GROUNDED
LOOKING DOWN—PASSING THEM BY (AH)
SUDDENLY THERE’S NOTHING IN BETWEEN (AH)
ME AND THE SKY
BEVERLEY
SUDDENLY I’VE GOT AN ALL-FEMALE CREW
THE NEWS CAUGHT AND MADE HEADLINES
ACROSS THE WORLD
SUDDENLY IT STOPPED, NO ONE’S SAYING
BEVERLEY (WITH FLIGHT ATTENDANTS)
(YOU CAN’T) OR (YOU WON’T)
OR (YOU KNOW) YOU’RE NOT ANYTHING (CAUSE YOU’RE A GIRL)
BEVERLEY
SUDDENLY I’M GETTING MARRIED
AND WE’RE PUTTING PINS ON A MAP WHERE WE’VE FLOWN
SUDDENLY I AM A MOTHER
AND SUDDENLY SHOCKED AT HOW MUCH
THEY’VE GROWN
SUDDENLY I’M WOND’RING HOW MY PARENTS
WOULD FEEL
SEEING ME TEACHING MEN TO BE PILOTS
CAUSE SUDDENLY I AM A SENIOR INSTRUCTOR 110
110 “Now I’m going to be instructing guys who are actually senior to
me… on 9/11 I
was training a
 92

AND SOMEHOW I’M FIFTY-ONE

SUDDENLY I’M FLYING PARIS TO DALLAS,
ACROSS THE ATLANTIC, AND FEELING CALM
WHEN SUDDENLY SOMEONE ON
AIR-TO-AIR TRAFFIC SAYS,
AT 8:46 THERE’S BEEN A TERRORIST ACTION 111
111 “I was coming from Paris to Dallas… Our feet were propped up.
And we hear on
air-to-air that an airplane has hit the World Trade Center.”
AND THE ONE THING I LOVED MORE THAN ANYTHING
WAS USED AS THE BOMB
SUDDENLY I’M IN A HOTEL
SUDDENLY SOMETHING HAS DIED
SUDDENLY THERE’S SOMETHING IN BETWEEN
ME AND THE…
Beverley answers the phone.
Hello?
I’m on my way.
JANICE (on camera)
1:34 a.m.
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE)
Friday.
JANICE (on camera)
September 14. Shelters will be alerted as each plane is cleared to go.
BOB
Our pilot says to pack up. It’s sudden notice—the middle of the night—and
we’re leaving in
an hour. But these people—they make these bag lunches—and they form a…
a gauntlet—
handing them out—and we all walk through it and get our lunches and say
goodbye to all of
them. We try to give them money, but they won’t take it. 112
112 IRENE: Tom McKeon traveled two and half hours to New York
City to meet with
us, having no idea who we were or what we were doing. Derm and
his wife, Dianne,
are like family now, and telling this story was important to him. He
told us that
“Leaving Appleton and leaving Newfoundland was like leaving this
little bit of
paradise. Being up there was a soothing thing. It was still a painful
thing the whole
time we were there, but the way the people are—they weren’t trying
to sugar coat it
—they were just trying to feed people and make people comfortable.
… They did
 93

whatever they could for us. It was just amazing.”

DERM
No, m’son. You would’ve done the same.
BOB
I drank all your whiskey.
DERM
I would’ve done the same.
The next morning, Diane wakes up, hungover.
NICK
Good morning.
DIANE
Nnnnnn.
NICK
You were snoring.
DIANE
My head hurts.
NICK
You had a couple.
DIANE
Did I kiss the fish?
He looks at her, surprised.
NICK
Don’t you—?… Yes, you did.
DIANE
Oh good… Wait—
NICK
We’re running out of time. Our plane could be the next one to go.
In another location Kevin T turns to Kevin J.
KEVIN T
Our plane could be the next one to go.… Are you still upset that I kissed a
fish?
KEVIN J
No. I’m upset that I left the bar and you didn’t even notice!
KEVIN T
You left without telling me—
KEVIN J
After everything that’s happened. You’re out there acting like it’s okay. And
it’s not okay.
KEVIN T
I know. But I’m not gonna shut myself inside. Let’s just get back to LA.
DIANE
While you’re in Dallas, I’d love to have you over.
KEVIN J
I tried to change my flight to New York. They wouldn’t do it.
NICK
My conference was canceled. So, I head back to London immediately. 113
 94

113 DAVID: Though they’re now separated, this scene mirrors the
foursome’s original
walk. As each of them realizes that they’re heading in different
directions, their lines
specifically mention which town they think of as “back home.”
KEVIN T
I don’t understand. Why would you…?
KEVIN J
I just need to be back home.
NICK
Back home.
DIANE
Back home.
KEVIN T
Back home.
All four are silent.
NICK (sadly)
Well. All good things, right?
BEULAH
As the plane people leave, they keep stopping us, thanking us, trying to give
us money, but
we say…
OZ
No, buddy. You would’ve done the same.
ANNETTE
But one guy keeps insisting ’til Beulah finally tells him…
BEULAH
Look, you can slip it in the suggestion box down at town hall, but honestly,
we’re happy with
a thank-you on your way out.
ANNETTE
Captain Bristol—that pilot for Virgin Atlantic. He comes to find me to help him
round up his
passengers.
CAPTAIN BRISTOL (over the top romantic)
Annette. My darling. Before I leave, I need to thank you for… everything
we’ve shared.
Though I travel home today, I leave my heart behind.
Annette salutes him.
BEULAH
Annette,/ for the-
ANNETTE
Don’t.
(stopping her from saying anything else)
Blablablablablaba—Goodbye!
All of the locals overlap saying goodbye.
 95

LOCAL 1
Goodbye!
LOCAL 2
Goodbye! I’ll miss you!
LOCAL 3
Tell us when the baby’s born!
BEULAH
I’ll be waiting by the phone.
BONNIE
Let us know you made it home safe!
ANNETTE
Take care now!
OZ
Don’t be a stranger.
GARTH
Don’t forget us now!
DWIGHT
Thank you for the bottle of wine!
CLAUDE
You write us now!
DOUG
Goodbye!
A beat. All the locals slump with a sigh, exhausted.
BOB
We get down to the airport—and it’s chaos. Passengers dropped off from
multiple flights.
Every bag has to be emptied.
OZ
No scissors. No nail clippers. If any bags are unidentified, they’ll be blown up.
BOB
Then, someone says there’s issues with security.
Beverley steps forward.
BEVERLEY
One of my flight attendants comes to find me. She says…
The flight attendant steps forward.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
There’s a Muslim man on our flight—
I saw him praying—and he’s been acting… suspicious. He doesn’t have a
carry-on… and…
I’m not getting back on that plane with him.
Ali steps forward.
ALI
I arrive at the airport and am pulled out of line.
BEVERLEY
I am responsible for the safety of my passengers and my crew. And security
tells me any
 96

perceived threats must be taken extremely seriously. They bring me to a

private room and
he is brought in for questioning.
ALI
At first I do not understand what the police are asking. And then I do.
In my culture, there is a word—“awrah”—the area between your stomach
and your knees.
It is forbidden in my religion for anyone to see this but my wife.
To have a woman in the room, watching this. Watching me.
You can’t understand.
BEVERLEY
It is the most thorough body search I’ve ever witnessed. And when it’s over, I
find him and I
tell him—I am so very sorry that happened.
ALI (barely looking at her)
Am I free to go now? 114
114 IRENE: Ali is an amalgamation of many people we interviewed or
heard about.
This specific moment came from Beverley Bass’s journal. Her crew
was concerned
about two men, who were each searched, and Beverley felt it was
her responsibility
to observe it. She didn’t know their religion, but we spoke with
another Muslim man
who was detained and searched in a similar manner following 9/11.
Beverley nods.
PASSENGER 11
When are we leaving?!
The crowd jumps in with questions as Beverley addresses them.
BEVERLEY
Good morning. We are one of the first flights to leave…
The crowd responds, relieved.
… which makes us one of the lucky ones as some planes may still be here for
quite some
time. Now, I have no control over this. You’ve paid for a flight from
Paris to Dallas. If I get clearance, I will take you to Dallas. But if I am not
cleared for
Dallas, I have to take you back to France.
The crowd starts murmuring.
But we will make arrangements as quickly as we can to get y’all back to the
United States
where you need to be.
PASSENGER 5
I can’t go back. I just adopted my daughter— 115
we could lose her if we go back to Europe…
I could lose my daughter. You have to take us home!
 97

115 IRENE: There were several families returning with children from
overseas
adoptions. The process is long and complicated and there was a real
fear that
returning could invalidate it.
KEVIN T
Hey. Calm down. I’m sure they’re doing the best they can. If she says they’re
going to get
us home, then they’re going to get us home. Let’s not make things any
harder.
KEVIN J
We’ve been here four days! How long are we going to be there? We were
trapped on our
plane forever and then we’ve been here for days with no information and
now you—
PASSENGER 10
America is at war! I’m not going back to France. You said yourself—we paid
for a ticket to
Dallas—that’s where we should be taken.
PASSENGER 11
There’s over two hundred of us—they’ll take us where the majority of us
want to go. I’m
serious—
PASSENGER 12
America just got attacked—what is wrong with you? What is wrong with you?
This is an
international tragedy!
PASSENGER 11 (after a moment he interrupts them)
Hey! Hey! We can vote on this. We can make them go where we want to go.
PASSENGER 5
Well, who’s for Dallas?
PASSENGER 11
Fuck that! Who’s for Switzerland?!
Everyone reacts.
BEVERLEY
This is not a democracy! I am the captain and this is coming from American
Airlines and the
FAA. You are not voting on our destination. Now, if we have any situation that
needs to be
dealt with, we will be pulled out of line and we will be the last flight to leave.
116
116 DAVID: This is one of the few Beverley moments that is
amalgamated from Tom
McKeon’s flight, where the captain had to deal with a possible
mutiny when the
passengers were told they weren’t going home.
 98

The crowd is quiet

Thank you for your cooperation.
HANNAH
After hours of waiting, they tell us we’re not leaving yet after all.
JANICE (on camera)
4:18 p.m. There’s a 747 with a flat tire blocking the runway.
The passengers react to the news, groaning.
All planes are stopped. No one’s taking off.
All of the locals jump up, still exhausted and surprised.
ANNETTE
Welcome back!!
LOCAL 1
Hello!
LOCAL 2
Welcome back.
BONNIE
I’ll put the kettle on.
BEULAH
I’ll get your room ready.
ANNETTE
Get in here!
OZ
You must’ve missed us. Come on in!
GARTH
Come on in!
DWIGHT
Did you forget something?
LOCAL 10
You’ve missed us. Come on in!
CLAUDE
Hello!
DOUG
Hello! That was fast.
DIANE
We’re told by our pilot to stay close to our shelters so we’re ready to go
again.
NICK
But Diane wants to take one last look around. And I can’t let her go by
herself.
DIANE
And we find a gorgeous lookout: the Dover Fault.
Diane stands on a chair and looks out.
NICK (exhausted)
There’s about a million stairs.
DIANE
It’s beautiful. Nick! You’ve gotta see this.
 99

He steps up next to her and looks. 117

117 DAVID: I remember the first time Chris and Kelly staged this,
with Nick and Diane
standing in the center of the stage on a table. And I think I must
have looked a little
disappointed that this majestic moment was represented so simply
—but the next
morning, they had replaced it with this brilliant turntable move with
the cast literally
building the lookout underneath them.
NICK
Wow…
DIANE
I can’t believe we’re here.
NICK
I know.
DIANE
I can’t believe we’re leaving!
NICK (quietly)
I don’t want to go.
DIANE
What did you say?
NICK
I don’t know. I’m—I’m going to get a picture or two.
DIANE
Oh, okay.
Nick turns to take a picture of her—and Diane freezes.
STOP the WORLD

NICK
STOP THE WORLD
TAKE A PICTURE
TRY TO CAPTURE
TO ENSURE THIS MOMENT LASTS
WE’RE STILL IN IT
BUT IN A MINUTE
THAT’S THE LIMIT
AND THIS PRESENT WILL BE PAST
SO HERE WE ARE
WHERE THE WORLD HAS COME TOGETHER
SO HERE SHE’LL BE
IN THIS PICTURE FOREVER
Diane unfreezes.
DIANE
Look at this: Five hundred and forty million years ago, the continents of the
world crashed
 100

together right here. And two hundred million years ago, they separated
again, moving apart
from each other. 118
118 DAVID: Dover’s lookout is one of the most beautiful spots, and
features some
very helpful displays about the geology of the area (seriously, how
could we resist a
good geological metaphor?). And since the show, there is now a
display about Nick
and Diane’s love and about Come From Away.
NICK
Huh.
DIANE
But a little part of them was left behind.
Nick lifts his camera, pointing it at her.
I should move. You’re missing all the scenery—
NICK
No, no. Stay where you are.
DIANE
Really?
NICK
Really. It’s perfect.
He takes another picture and this time Nick freezes.
DIANE
STOP THE WORLD
SEIZE THE MOMENT
BUT THE MINUTE HE GOES
YOU’RE ALONE AND IT’S THROUGH
PINCH YOURSELF
TELL YOURSELF
YOU’RE JUST DREAMING
THAT MEANS HE’LL FORGET ABOUT YOU
BUT HERE WE ARE
WHERE THE CONTINENTS ONCE CRASHED TOGETHER
BEFORE THEY WENT
THEIR SEPARATE WAYS FOREVER, SO
DIANE
STOP THE WORD
STOP THE WORLD
STOP THE WORLD
FROM SPINNING ROUND
NICK
STOP THE WORLD
STOP THE WORLD
FROM SPINNING ROUND
Everyone else begins to sing underneath.
 101

DIANE & NICK

I’M ON A LOOKOUT
OVERLOOKING SOMETHING
WORTH TAKING THE TIME
TO STOP FLYING BY
AND LOOK DOWN
STOP BEING SCARED
AND LOOK DOWN
JUST TELL HER/HIM NOW
AND LOOK NOW
EVERYONE ELSE
OH…
AND LOOK DOWN
STOP THE WORLD
AND LOOK ROUND
STOP THE WORLD
AAH!
AAH!
DIANE & NICK
TAKE A PICTURE OF THE SCENERY
OF A LOOKOUT
OF A MOMENT WHICH IS OVER
OF THE OCEAN OF THE RIVER OF THE TREES
They look at each other for a second and then turn away.
STOP THE WORLD PLEASE

Good BYES

CLAUDE
9:35 a.m.
ALL (EXCEPT CLAUDE)
Saturday.
CLAUDE
September 15. Finally, they get the planes going again—and I go down to tell
the Wish Kids
that they’re being sent home without getting to Disney World after all. But
they’re not sad
about it. They’re going on hayrides, canoe rides, and someone dresses up as
the town
mascot: Commander Gander. And it turns out that if they’d made it to
Orlando, they
would’ve got four days of rain. 119
119 IRENE: This speech was originally given by Oz, but was shifted
to Claude, cutting
his previous speech, which we still miss.
CLAUDE
 102

September 15. Finally, they get the planes going again—but now we’re
missing
passengers. One guy is found in the bar. Others say they can’t fly today
because of their
religion. And another guy—he went missing completely—till we found out
that one of the
locals had invited him moose-hunting. Two more were up on Dover Fault
taking in the
view. But we eventually got everyone to where they were meant to be.
Bonnie is alone in the hangar with the animals.
BONNIE (to Doug)
I’m just doing one more litter scoop, and then I’ll get them on the planes!
Actor 3 meows. Bonnie bends down to a carrier.
Lyle. You’re a beautiful cat. I’ve taped your pill bottle to your carrier and
made sure
someone’ll see it. You did good. You’re going to be fine.
Actor 3 barks. Bonnie moves along.
Ralph. You’re a good cocker spaniel. I know the night security crew ran you a
bit ragged,
so I want you to get some sleep on the plane, okay?
Actor 3 barks again.
Okay.
She moves along.
… Unga… I’ve never met a rare Bonobo chimpanzee before. We don’t get
many of them
here in Newfoundland. And since your partner there likes to throw his own
feces, I’m going
to say that you are the nicest rare Bonobo chimpanzee I’ve ever met… And I
want you to
know that I’m sorry… I’m sorry that you lost your baby… I’ve got three, and
some days
they’re more trouble than they’re worth… Anyway. You’re going to be okay.
BEULAH As the busses start to load up, we’re checking all the classrooms to
make sure
no one’s left behind—and on a chalkboard—one of the passengers drew this
incredible
sketch—of a goose in flight—every feather incredibly detailed.
JANICE
In one of the shelters, we find someone’s wedding ring.
GARTH
Under the seat on one of our buses, I find a family bible.
OZ
But we have no way to contact them.
BEULAH
And the drawing—it’s just chalk. Next week, it’ll be wiped off. But right now—
it’s beautiful.
 103

BEVERLEY
The winds start to pick up. Fifty-mile-an-hour winds. We’ve been here too
long. We’re still
on the ground and there’s a hurricane coming. And I’m thinking—we’re
running out of time.
We have to leave. We have to leave now.
Bonnie runs toward Doug in the airport.
BONNIE
Doug! I’ve got to get back on.
DOUG
They’re all loaded up, Bonnie.
BONNIE
I forgot to put return addresses on the carriers!
DOUG
They’re gonna be fine.
BONNIE
I’ll never know if they made it okay. I’ve got to—
DOUG
Bonnie. They’re gonna be fine. You did good. You gotta let them go. 120
120 IRENE: Bonnie only received updates about a couple of the
animals. Ralph’s
adopted family sent pictures, and she was able to keep tabs on
Unga. And Petrina,
who plays Bonnie, eventually met Ralph’s family when they came to
see the show.

SOMEWHERE in the MIDDLE OF

NOWHERE

ALL (VARIOUSLY)
ONE PLANE THEN ANOTHER AND THEN
NINE PLANES THEN ANOTHER AND THEN
THIRTEEN PLANES THEN ANOTHER (NINETEEN PLANES THEN ANOTHER)
TWENTY-TWO—TWENTY-FOUR—TWENTY-NINE—THIRTY-TWO
THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT
THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT
THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT THIRTY-EIGHT
THIRTY THIRTY THIRTY-EIGHT PLANES
On a plane, Beverley makes an announcement.
BEVERLEY
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN: IF YOU LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOWS
UNDERNEATH ALL THAT RAIN—IS MAINE
WE’VE JUST CROSSED THE CANADIAN BORDER
WELCOME BACK TO THE U. S. OF A.
The passengers cheer.
BOB
 104

LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW AT THE WORLDUNDERNEATH

DIANE
AND THOUGH HE’S HERE NEXT TO ME, IN A SECOND HE’LL GO 121
121 DAVID: The original lyric here was “AND OUT THE WINDOW WE
SEE OVER A
GAMBO A RAINBOW.” Nick and Diane, who were housed in Gambo,
told us that
when they left, there was a rainbow, and they knew they’d “always
be under the
same sky” (which we knew was sadly too sweet to put in a musical).
I miss this lyric
mostly because it’s what our daughter still sings (she sings it to our
cat, named
“Gambo”).
KEVIN J
LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW
KEVIN T
KEVIN, TALK TO ME, PLEASE.
HANNAH
AND OUT THE WINDOW WE SEE
ALL
A PLACE WE ALL KNOW BELOW
Beverley hands Bob the microphone.
BOB
IS THIS ON? OH, IT’S ON. SORRY, EVERYONE—HI!
LIKE MOST EVERYONE, I AM SORRY SAYING GOODBYE
SO I WANTED TO THANK THEM FOR ALL THAT THEY DID
SO I’M DOING JUST THAT—AND I’M PASSING A HAT
FOR THE PEOPLE WHO GAVE UP THEIR TIME
AND THEY GAVE UP THEIR TOWN
SO LET’S GIVE THEM A SCHOLARSHIP! 122
122 IRENE: Though there’s a much-shared online article from a flight
attendant on
Delta 15, which details how a man made this announcement, it was
actually made by
Shirley Brooks-Jones, a diverted passenger who was housed in
Lewisporte. Shirley
has since returned to Newfoundland 29 times and has granted
scholarships to more
than 270 students.
PASS THE HAT DOWN, ’CAUSE
Bob holds up his Sou’wester hat and passes it along.
1, 2, 6, 7, 8 & 9
SOMEWHERE—IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS WHERE
THERE YOU’LL FIND
 105

3, 4, 5, 10, 11 & 12
SOMEWHERE—IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS (WHO KNOWS)
THERE YOU’LL FIND
ALL
SOMETHING—IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF CLEAR, BLUE AIR—YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
DIANE
Nick and I sit together and I just want to say something, but we’re leaving…
and it’s over…
NICK
And then she starts crying. And I don’t know what to say, so I just put my
arm around her—
and I go to kiss her on the forehead—to comfort her.
DIANE
Well, there was some turbulence—and honestly, I just thought he missed! So
I—
She grabs Nick and kisses him.
BEVERLEY
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IF YOU LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW
YOU WON’T WANT TO MISS THIS—WE JUST ENTERED TEXAS!
2, 6, 1 & 5
SOMEWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS WHERE
THERE YOU’LL FIND
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF
CLEAR, BLUE AIR
YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
3&4
SOMEWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS
WHO KNOWS
THERE YOU’LL FIND
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF
 106

CLEAR, BLUE AIR

YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
7&8
(SOMEWHERE)
(NOWHERE)
WHO KNOWS WHERE YOU’LL FIND
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
(SOMETHING)
(NOWHERE)
WHERE
YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
9, 10, 11 & 12
SOMEWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS WHO KNOWS
THERE YOU’LL FIND
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF
CLEAR, BLUE AIR
YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
JOEY
Everyone’s drinking and comparing stories.
DELORES
Where did you stay? What did you do?
DIANE
But mostly Nick and I spend the plane ride home canoodling in the back.
NICK
At one point, a flight attendant comes ’round saying…
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Hot towel? Hot towel?
She looks at Diane and Nick kissing.
Cold towel?
2, 3, 6, 9, 10, 11 & 12
SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN
THE PACE OF LIFE AND WORK
AND WHERE YOU’RE GOING
1, 4, 5, 7, 8, 11 & 12
SOMETHING MAKES YOU STOP AND NOTICE
1, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9 & 10
AND YOU’RE FINALLY IN THE MOMENT
 107

2, 6, 1, 7, 8 & 9
SOMEWHERE
IN TH LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHINDE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS WHERE
THERE YOU’LL FIND
3, 4, 5, 10, 11 & 12
SOMEWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF WHO KNOWS
WHO KNOWS
THERE YOU’LL FIND
ALL WOMEN
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF
CLEAR, BLUE AIR
YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
7&8
(SOMETHING)
(NOWHERE)
WHERE
YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
9, 10, 11 & 12
SOMETHING
IN THE MIDDLE OF
NOWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF
CLEAR, BLUE AIR
YOU FOUND YOUR HEART
BUT LEFT A PART OF YOU BEHIND
BEVERLEY
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
PUT YOUR SEAT BACKS
AND TRAY TABLES UP
RIGHT BELOW US IS THE CITY
WHERE I GREW UP
COMING ’ROUND PAST THE
FIELD, THEN THE WHEELS
TOUCH THE GROUND
TAXIING, WE’RE ALL CHEERING,
WE’RE DOWN!
THANKING EVERYONE—THANK
YOU FOR FLYING AMERICAN!
 108

HUGGING THEM
HUGGING MY CREW CAUSE
WE’RE HOME AGAIN
PAST THE GATE
UP THE STAIRS
AND WE’RE THERE
AND HE’S WAITING IN LINE
(acapella)
NO, I’M FINE TOM, I’M FINE
7, 8, 9
HOME, AMERICA 123
123 IRENE: Chad Kimball has always been a very “method” actor but
he absolutely
proved himself when he threw his neck out while doing the
choreography here. As
the cast sings their lyric “Home America,” they jolt their bodies
forward, signifying
the plane landing. As they all came back up to neutral, Chad
immediately had his
hand on his neck. Once he delivered the news of what he done and
started laughing,
we all joined him.
HOME IN AMERICA
ADD 3, 4, 5
HOME, AMERICA
HOME IN AMERICA
ALL
HOME, AMERICA
HOME IN AMERICA
HOME, AMERICA
HOME IN AMERICA
HOME

“Coming ’round past the field, then the wheels

touch the ground.”

SOMETHING’s
Missing
Diane and Nick face each other.

DIANE
So…
NICK
So…
DIANE
So you’ll call?
 109

NICK
As soon as I get back.
DIANE & NICK
And then he/she left
And then I was alone.
JANICE
BACK TO THE WAY THAT THINGS WERE
OZ
BACK TO THE SIMPLE AND PLAIN
DWIGHT
FOR FIVE DAYS THE WEATHER HAD BEEN SO NICE
BONNIE
BUT AS THEY BOARDED IT STARTED TO RAIN 124
124 DAVID: One of the few moments where no one speaks on stage—
and also a
callback to the threat of Hurricane Erin earlier. Though it hit other
areas harder, this
rain was Erin finally arriving.
A moment, as they all look up. 125
125 IRENE: At the first Seattle workshop, they were all seated at
tables and still
reading from their scripts. On a whim, Chris asked them to look up
at the sky at that
moment. That simple movement brought tears to our eyes. And that
was the way the
rest of the movement of the piece turned out. Simple and strong.
BEULAH
AT THE END OF THE DAY, AFTER EVERYONE LEFT
OZ
WE ALL TRIED TO GO BACK TO NORMAL EXCEPT
CLAUDE
THE TOWN WAS MORE QUIET AND SOMEHOW FAR EMPTIER
BONNIE
WE ALL LOOKED THE SAME, BUT WE’RE DIFFERENT THAN WE WERE
BEULAH
THE GYM WAS A SIGHT—AS I STACKED THE LAST COT
DWIGHT
THANK-YOUS WRITTEN EVERYWHERE AND THINGS THEY FORGOT
CLAUDE
THE BOARD OF HEALTH SAYS CLEAN IT UP—EVERY PART
ALL
SO WE START
CLAUDE
7:42 a.m.
ALL (EXCEPT CLAUDE)
Sunday.
 110

CLAUDE
September 16. After five days, they just ran the Zamboni over the ice. And
played hockey.
With the plane people gone, I tell my staff, “Go home, get some sleep.” We
were all
exhausted—just spent—most of us had been up for five days straight
working. But
somehow, I can’t sleep, so I sit down and turn on the television. And I just
start crying. I
hadn’t let myself cry the whole time.
ALL (EXCEPT CLAUDE)
SOMETHING’S GONE
BOB
Out the airplane window, I can see Manhattan and there’s still smoke. And
suddenly I’m
afraid all over again—and there are others afraid too.
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
SOMETHING’S OVER
BOB
I know Newark airport. You could pull a truck over on the side of the turnpike
and shoot a
grenade launcher at a plane coming in.
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
SOMETHING’S DONE
BOB
But nothing happens.
KEVIN T
I drive Kevin back to his place. We don’t say much.
ALL (EXCEPT KEVIN T)
SOMETHING’S MISSING
HANNAH
I go straight to his firehouse. Part of me wondered if they just weren’t telling
me, but… they
still don’t know.
ALL (EXCEPT HANNAH)
SOMETHING’S CHANGED
NICK
My flat is the same as I left it. But emptier. Quieter. I start to unpack—and I
find the
camera.
ALL (EXCEPT NICK)
SOMETHING’S REARRANGED
ALI
On the way to my restaurant, I drop my daughter at school, but she won’t go
in. She says
she’s scared. What do I tell her?
 111

ALL (EXCEPT ALI)

SOMETHING’S STRAINED
BOB
Back at my dad’s house—I look out the window—at this view I’ve looked at
my whole life.
And now a part of it—something’s missing.
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
SOMETHING’S MISSING
KEVIN T
Kevin breaks up with me. And then he quits and moves back home to New
York. And I miss
him. I miss his jokes.
ALL (EXCEPT KEVIN T)
SOMETHING’S LOST
DIANE
Nick and I call each other when we can. But… it’s awful. The only reason we
met was
because this terrible thing happened.
ALL (EXCEPT DIANE)
SOME THINGS COST
BOB
I go down to Ground Zero, which is like the end of the world. It’s literally still
burning.
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
SOMETHING’S NOT
BOB
My dad asks, “Were you ok out where you were stranded?” How do I tell him
that I wasn’t
just okay—I was so much better. 126
126 IRENE: Tom McKeon described to us how being in Newfoundland
changed him.
He said, “it was like taking a laser to whatever jadedness I had. It
kind of excised
that bit of judgment that goes with first meetings or with suspicion.
And I’ve never
been that way since. It just made me like feel more of an open
person.”
ALL (EXCEPT BOB)
SOMETHING’S MISSING
BEVERLEY
I phone American and say, “I’m ready to go wherever you want to send me.”
But they say
take a few days off. I phone every day and I am back at the airport by
Thursday. And it’s
empty. Silent. It’s just—a different place. And I stop what few passengers
there are and I
 112

say, “Thank you for still flying.”

Beulah answers the phone.
BEULAH
Hello. You’ve reached the Gander Academy, this is Beulah Davis. How can I
help you?
HANNAH
… He’s gone. It’s over.
BEULAH
. . .Oh, no. I’m so sorry, Hannah. I’m so sorry.
HANNAH
YOU ARE HERE
AT THE END OF A MOMENT
AT THE END OF THE WORLD
YOU ARE HERE
ON THE EDGE OF THE OCEAN
WHERE THE STORY ENDS
HERE
NICK
ACROSS THE ATLANTIC
KEVIN T
AT THE OFFICE
BEVERLEY
IN AN AIRPORT
DIANE
IN MY HOUSE
BOB
ON AN ISLAND
BEULAH
IN A CLASSROOM
JANICE
AT THE STATION
OZ
IN MY CAR
ALL
AND WHEREVER YOU ARE
DIANE, JANICE, BONNIE & BEULAH
(SOMETHING’S GONE)
ALL
YOU ARE HERE
BEULAH
WHERE THE RIVER MEETS
THE SEA
EVERYONE ELSE
SOMETHING’S GONE
SOMETHING’S OVER
EVERYONE ELSE
 113

SOMETHING’S REARRANGED

CUT FROM AWAY

Bob’s
SONG127

127 DAVID: “Bob’s Song” was never fully workshopped. It came from
our interview
with Tom McKeon about his experience returning from “heaven on
earth” to find his
father, a former fireman, traumatized over what had happened
(though it was
actually his friend Vinnie who met him at the airport. He and Vinnie
returned to
Newfoundland that February to “make sure it was real”). Even now,
Bob’s narrative
still drives “Something’s Missing.”
BOB
MY FATHER’S WAITING AT THE AIRPORT
LIKE HE’S BEEN STANDING THERE FOR DAYS
BEER IN HIS HAND AND THE OLD MAN SMILES
THROUGH THE TEARS—WELCOME BACK, HE SAYS
WE GO STRAIGHT DOWN TO GROUND ZERO
IT’S LIKE THE END OF THE WORLD
STILL BURNING, I TURN AND LOOK INTO THE PIT
AND THINK OF WHERE I WAS, THE DIAMETRIC OPPOSITE
MY FATHER IS NOT AN EMOTIONAL MAN
HE NEVER CRIES—I USED TO THINK HE HAD NO TEARS
BUT MY FATHER WAS A FIREMAN
AND THOUGH HE’S NOW RETIRED
THERE’S A PART OF HIM HE’S KEPT INSIDE
HIS HEART A PART THAT CAN’T STOP CRYING HERE
MY FATHER SAYS, “WAS IT OKAY WHERE YOU WERE STRANDED?”
AND I’M THINKING ABOUT APPLETON AND HEAVEN ON EARTH
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, WE LANDED WHERE WE LANDED
BUT I WASN’T JUST OKAY -
I WAS ALMOST SOMEONE ELSE BACK THERE
WE DRIVE BACK HOME ACROSS THE BRIDGE
I LOOK BEHIND ME IN THE REARVIEW MIRROR
THIS SCENE THAT I HAVE SEEN SINCE I WAS JUST A KID
AND IN THE MIDDLE IN THE DISTANCE
LIKE A PIECE OF REMINISCING
LIKE A PART OF ME CUT OUT
I LOOK BEHIND ME AT THE TOWN
AND SOMETHING’S MISSING
 114

NOW I AM NOT AN EMOTIONAL MAN

LIKE MY FATHER I DON’T CRY MUCH
I JUST DON’T KNOW HOW TO CRY MUCH
BUT IN THE REARVIEW MIRROR
A PART OF ME HAS DISAPPEARED
AND I CAN’T TELL MY FATHER
THAT I’M HAPPY I WAS THERE
THOUGH I AM HORRIFIED THIS HAPPENED
I CAN’T TELL HIM I WAS HAPPY
AND HE’S WAITING ON ME, LISTENING, CRYING,
TRYING TO CONNECT BUT
SOMETHING’S MISSING

Back TO NORMAL

JANICE
When Gander town council declares the state of emergency over, it means
that everything
goes back to normal. 126
126 IRENE: We were so worried that there was going to be a rewrite
coming, because
at the end of the previous scene, they are all on stage as one
character and in the
next moment they need to become another and be in the exact
same spots. Just as I
could feel the rest of the creative team looking over at us to tell us
to go back to the
drawing board, Petrina, our only Newfoundlander involved at that
point, piped up.
“Why don’t I just take Chad’s jacket off him?” Thus turning him from
Kevin T to
Garth. We tried it. And she reached up to his collar and ripped that
thing off him as
he said his first line. And it worked. And it became clear in that
moment that was the
way the show was going to work. Everyone would help everyone
else and things
would change on the fly, both hidden from sight and in plain view.
Petrina’s track
remains the hardest of everyone’s, because she always offered to
do something for
someone else.
She moves to reveal Claude and Garth.
CLAUDE
Garth.
GARTH
 115

Claude.
CLAUDE
Look.
GARTH
Look.
CLAUDE
Look at it from my perspective.
GARTH
Will you look at it from my perspective?
CLAUDE
We’ve been coming to the table.
GARTH
We’ve been coming to the table too!
BOTH
Jaysus!
Claude enters Tim Hortons.
CLAUDE
Morning, Crystal.
1 (CRYSTAL)
Morning Mr. Mayor. Pepsi?
CLAUDE
That’s right. Morning, Dwight.
DWIGHT
Morning, Claude. Garth. Crystal.
DOUG
Claude. Crystal. Dwight. Garth. Morning.
JANICE
Morning, B’ys.
CLAUDE
Morning, Janice.
DWIGHT
Janice.
GARTH
Janice.
DOUG
Janice.
CRYSTAL
Janice.
CLAUDE
What’s the news?
JANICE
Strike still on?
GARTH
Well, we’re coming to the table.
CLAUDE
Well, we’re coming to the table too.
 116

DWIGHT
Are they tearing down the airport?
CLAUDE
Not today.
Oz runs in.
OZ
Mr. Mayor, I saw your car in the lot. You might want to get down to town hall.
We just
opened the suggestion box.
CLAUDE
When the bank finally converted all the currency from around the world—
people had
donated over sixty thousand dollars.
Everyone whistles.
ANNETTE
Every day, for months, passengers sent back chocolates, flowers…
BEULAH
Donations of all kinds.

OZ 129
129 DAVID: A cut section that used to include more ways that people
gave back to the
community that gave them so much. We eventually cut it down
because it felt like we
were focusing too much on the rewards, though the truth is that the
passengers
gave back in a myriad of uncounted ways.
Some of the plane people were from the Rockefeller Foundation.
BEULAH
They donated a new computer lab.
ANNETTE
And we updated the school library.
CLAUDE
Postcards and letters came in from everywhere.
Beulah opens a letter as Ali reads.
ALI
Dear Miss Beulah. When my daughter asks about what happened to me over
those five
days, I tell her about your kindness. Thank you again. Sincerely, Ali. P.S.,
please send me
the recipe for the fish and the cheese.
Bonnie and Doug step forward.
BONNIE
Ralph, the cocker spaniel, went on to become a champion show dog! 130
130 IRENE: I asked Bonnie in 2011 if she had been the recipient of
any of the goodwill
 117

that was directed back to Gander, and other than Ralph’s “parents,”
she had not
been. I vowed then to help the small Gander and Area SPCA, and it
started by
passing a bucket at the first Sheridan workshop.
DOUG
And Unga, the rare Bonobo chimpanzee arrived safely at the Columbus Zoo.
BONNIE
And soon after, she had a baby—which they named Gander.
Janice steps forward.
JANICE
Tom Brokaw 131 phones me. Tom Brokaw. He’s doing a documentary—and
since I was the
only reporter in town—I’m the only one with any footage.
131 DAVID: Tom Brokaw’s documentary, Operation Yellow Ribbon,
has been a
wonderful reference for us—and came full circle when Tom attended
the show and
then interviewed us on stage; however, Brian Mosher, who Janice is
partly based on,
was initially contacted not by Tom, but by Oprah Winfrey! He still
has her message
on his answering machine. We only changed it because Tom actually
made a
documentary; however, in England and Australia, where Tom Brokaw
is less wellknown,
Janice talks about receiving a call from Oprah.
Tom. Brokaw.
It was a big break—but I didn’t really like shoving microphones into people’s
faces when
they were going through so much. So, I stayed here in Gander—and I’m still
here today—
on the tenth anniversary.

CUT FROM AWAY

Washington 132

132 DAVID: More than any other cut material, I miss this song.
JANICE
It’s been almost ten years since September 11, 2001—Today in Washington,
Mayor
Claude Elliott will receive a community resilience award from the White
House.
CLAUDE stands, surprised, awkwardly waiting to accept his award.
CLAUDE
 118

THEY ASKED ME HERE TODAY TO BE AWARDED

RESILIENCE FOR MY COMMUNITY
BUT I’M NOT SURE THAT IT’S RIGHT
THAT I AM HERE TONIGHT
WITH ALL THESE OTHER PEOPLE HERE BESIDE ME
THERE’S A WOMAN TO MY LEFT WHO LOST A SON
THERE’S A CEO WHO LOST ALL OF HIS CREW
AND I DON’T THINK THAT IT’S RIGHT
THAT I AM HERE TONIGHT
AWARDED FOR WHAT ONE JUST OUGHT TO DO
BUT I AM
CLAUDE & MALE CHORUS
PROUD OF MY TOWN
PROUD OF MY COMMUNITY
AND PROUD TO SAY I COME FROM NEWFOUNDLAND
CLAUDE
BUT I DON’T THINK THAT IT’S RIGHT
THAT I AM HERE TONIGHT
BEING THANKED FOR SIMPLY GIVING FOLKS A HAND
BACK HOME THEY’LL BE SAYING WE SHOULD
COMMEMORATE THE DAY
BUT PLAY IT DOWN, GOOD DEEDS DON’T COUNT
IF THEY ARE DONE WITH PRIDE
AND AWARDS AND CEREMONIES AREN’T A FITTING WAY TO PAY
RESPECT FOR ALL THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE DIED
AFTER ALL IS SAID AND THE AWARDS ALL GIVEN OUT
THAT MOTHER HUGS ME AND SAYS THANKS FOR WHAT YOU’VE DONE
SHE SAYS KINDNESS—HUMAN KINDNESS
IS WHAT THIS WORLD NEEDS MORE OF NOW
AND YOU’VE GIVEN ME THE STRENGTH TO CARRY ON
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, SO I SIMPLY MUMBLE THANKS
AND I SHYLY SHAKE THE CEO’S HAND
MAYBE IT IS RIGHT
THAT I AM HERE TONIGHT
BUT I WISH EVERYONE WAS HERE FROM NEWFOUNDLAND
SINGING SONGS ABOUT OUR HOME AND NATIVE LAND
GIVE ME A HEY, HO—PUT YOUR BACKS INTO IT, BOYS, AND THEN
WE’LL BE ROWING TILL WE SEE THE HARBOR LIGHTS
CLAUDE & MALE CHORUS
GIVE ME A HEY, HO—PUT YOUR BACKS INTO IT, BOYS, AND THEN
WE’LL BE BACK AGAIN IN NEWFOUNDLAND TONIGHT
GIVE ME A HEY, HO—PUT YOUR BACKS INTO IT, BOYS, AND THEN
WE’LL BE ROWING TILL WE SEE THE HARBOR LIGHTS
GIVE ME A HEY, HO—PUT YOUR BACKS INTO IT, BOYS, AND THEN
WE’LL BE BACK AGAIN IN NEWFOUNDLAND
BE BACK AGAIN IN NEWFOUNDLAND
 119

BE BACK AGAIN IN NEWFOUNDLAND TONIGHT

Finale

Reporters from around the world overlap, all on camera. 133

133 DAVID: We originally included reporters from ABC and NBC, but
Beverley Bass
corrected us in that there were no American TV stations covering
the tenth
anniversary in Newfoundland.
REPORTER 9
I’m reporting live from Newfoundland for BBC.
REPORTER 8
CBC.
REPORTER 7
CTV.
REPORTER 5
Al Jazeera.
JANICE
For Rogers TV, I’m Janice Mosher—on September 11.
ALL (EXCEPT JANICE)
Two thousand eleven.
JANICE
The town is again filled with come-from-aways. On the tenth anniversary,
from all around
the world, we welcome back the plane people.
CLAUDE
One! Two!
ALL
One two three four!
CLAUDE
WELCOME TO THE FRIENDS WHO HAVE COME FROM AWAY (HEP!)
WELCOME TO THE LOCALS WHO HAVE ALWAYS SAID THEY’D STAY (HEP!)
IF YOU’RE COMING FROM TOLEDO OR YOU’RE COMING FROM TAIPEI
BECAUSE WE COME FROM EVERYWHERE
ALL
WE ALL COME FROM AWAY
MEN
WELCOME TO THE ROCK
WOMEN
I’M AN ISLANDER,
ALL
I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER, I AM AN ISLANDER
 120

ANNETTE
WELCOME TO OUR ISLAND WITH ITS INLETS AND ITS BAYS
YOU COULD KEEP ON HEADING EAST, BUT THERE’S AN OCEAN IN THE WAY
GARTH
WHERE EVERYTHING IS MEANT TO BE, BUT NOTHING GOES AS PLANNED
OZ
AND THE DRUNKEST FELLAS IN THE ROOM ARE PLAYING IN THE BAND
The band rocks out on stage.
ALL
WELCOME TO THE ROCK
A reporter is interviewing Beverley.
BEVERLEY
With all the new security, kids aren’t even allowed up in the cockpit
anymore. Of course on
my retirement flight, I brought my whole family up to the cockpit, on our way
back to
Gander.
A reporter is interviewing Bob and Derm.
BOB
I came back with the scholarship money we raised—now worth over a million
dollars.
DERM
I bring out the Irish whiskey and we have ourselves a toast.
A reporter is interviewing Diane.
DIANE
Nick and I just couldn’t make the long distance relationship work.
Nick joins the interview.
NICK
So, I moved to Texas—and then I proposed!
DIANE
And we honeymooned in Newfoundland.
A reporter is interviewing Kevin T.
KEVIN T
My new secretary’s name is Robin.
ROBIN
What’s up?
KEVIN T
Every year on September 11, I close my office and give each employee one
hundred dollars
to go and do random good deeds for strangers. It’s my way of remembering
what
happened. 134
134 IRENE: There was an early idea for a song that started with
Kevin’s pay-it-forward
movement that saw a wave a good deeds spread across all the cities
the characters
 121

were in. Eventually, it got cut, but it’s been amazing to see it
actually happen in
practice as each of our companies embraces random acts of
kindness toward
strangers, raising money for charities, making packages for food
banks, and
spreading kindness.
A reporter is interviewing Hannah and Beulah.
HANNAH
Beulah and I still keep in touch. She even came to visit me in New York—and
I still phone
her if I hear a really stupid joke. Hey, Beulah. Why are Newfoundlanders
terrible at knockknock
jokes?
BEULAH
I don’t know, Hannah.
HANNAH
Well, try it. I’ll be a Newfoundlander.
BEULAH
Knock knock.
HANNAH
Come on in—the door’s open! 135
135 DAVID: I love this Newfoundland joke, but my favorite is, “How
do you tell the
Newfoundlanders in Heaven? They’re the ones that want to go
home.”
Beulah laughs.
JANICE
The donation we are most honored by just arrived today.
OZ
It’s about four meters long and 1,200 kilograms.
JANICE
Newfoundland is one of the only places outside of the United States, where
we share the
steel from the World Trade Center.
Claude steps forward.
CLAUDE
On the northeast tip of North America, on an island called Newfoundland,
there’s an airport
—and next to it, is a town called Gander.
Tonight, we honor what was lost. But we also commemorate what we found!
136
136 IRENE: Claude’s lines here were inspired by his speeches he
gave at the tenth
anniversary. Since then, we have seen him speak time and again
and he is an
 122

incredible orator, who consistently makes his wife nervous by

improvising his
speeches on the spot. Thankfully, Joel Hatch captures him perfectly
(though Claude
does often mention that Joel has slightly less hair than him).
ALL
YOU ARE HERE
AT THE START OF A MOMENT
ON THE EDGE OF THE WORLD
WHERE THE RIVER MEETS THE SEA
HERE ON THE EDGE OF THE ATLANTIC
ON AN ISLAND IN BETWEEN
2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8 & 10
THERE AND HERE
THERE AND HERE
THERE AND HERE
ALL
I AM AN ISLANDER
1, 4, 9, 11 & 12
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER—I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER—
MEN
WELCOME TO THE FOG
WELCOME TO THE TREES
A KISS—AND A COD
AND WHATEVER’S IN BETWEEN
TO THE ONES WHO’VE LEFT 137
137 IRENE: From the very first workshop in Seattle to his last
performance with us,
Rodney Hicks pointed at the sky on this line and then tapped his
chest. I still miss it.
YOU’RE NEVER TRULY GONE
A CANDLE’S IN THE WINDOW
AND THE KETTLE’S ALWAYS ON
ALL
TO THE COVES AND THE CAVES
AND THE PEOPLE FROM THE PLANES
CLAUDE
FIVE DAYS!
BONNIE
NINETEEN ANIMALS!
BEULAH
 123

AND SEVEN THOUSAND STRAYS!

MEN
WHEN THE SUN IS SETTING
AND IT’S DARKER THAN BEFORE
IF YOU’RE HOPING FOR A HARBOR
THEN YOU’LL FIND AN OPEN DOOR
IN THE WINTER FROM THE WATER
THROUGH WHATEVER’S IN THE WAY
WOMEN
I’M AN ISLANDER
I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER
I AM AN ISLANDER
I’M AN ISLANDER
I AM
ALL
TO THE ONES WHO HAVE COME FROM AWAY, WE SAY
WELCOME TO THE—WELCOME TO THE
WELCOME TO THE—WELCOME TO THE
WELCOME TO THE—WELCOME TO THE—WELCOME TO THE
ROCK!
Blackout. Bows, followed by the band rocking out. 138
138 DAVID: At La Jolla, Chris asked for some exit music that the band
could play as
the audience left, and Ian Eisendrath stitched together this
incredible medley of
tunes from the show—a kind of post-overture—but it backfired when
the audience
refused to leave. It was the worst exit music ever! Eventually, we
had the band come
out to perform and everyone stays to clap. For the album, we
wanted a better title
than just “Exit Music”—and Petrina Bromley came up with “Screech
Out.” (Petrina
also came up with the definitive title to Bonnie’s unwritten song (for
now), “Fish and
Chimps.”) I love that after watching the entire show, the audience is
welcomed into a
Newfoundland kitchen party. It feels like the best way we could have
ended this
story.