How to Text

Men:
A Practical Guide to Texting (with examples)

hey. is everything okay? I'm at an amazing

coffee shop.. I finally
found a good latte.
Why aren't you here!

Affemity
Contents

1. Introductio
Purpose of the guid
Importance of communication in datin
Brief overview of texting etiquette

2. Texting Scenarios and Examples

2.1. Initiating the Conversation (Texting First

Explanation of why certain approaches wor
Examples of what to avoi
Examples of how to start a conversation

2.2. Flirting Over Tex

Flirty text examples to catch his interes
Common flirting text pitfall
Tips on keeping the flirtatious conversation engaging

2.3. Provoking an Invitation to a Dat

Subtle texts to suggest interest in meeting u
What not to say when trying to provoke a date invitatio
Understanding the cues from his responses

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 2.4. When He Doesn't Respond Promptly or Doesn't Initiat
How to deal with delayed responses or no initiatio
Text examples that encourage a reply without seeming desperat
Strategies for maintaining your cool and dignity

2.5. When NOT to Tex

Scenarios where texting might not be appropriat
Examples of texts that could push him awa
Explaining the rationale behind texting restraint

3. Additional Tips and Confidence Booster

General tips for texting men effectively
Confidence boosters to help you text authentically and fearlessly
Motivational advice to act according to your desires without overthinking

Bonus

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Introduction

Welcome to "How to Text Men: A Practical Guide to Texting." Whether you're

newly single, actively dating, or in a budding relationship, mastering the art of
texting can significantly enhance your interactions with men. This guide is
crafted to empower you with the knowledge and tools to communicate
effectively, maintain intrigue, and express your personality charmingly and
confidently through text.

Why is Texting Important?

In the digital age, texting is more than just a convenience; it's a staple of
personal communication, especially in dating. The way you text can set the tone
for new relationships and maintain the spark in existing ones. Texting effectively
requires an understanding of both what to say and how to say it, balancing
sincerity with playfulness, interest with independence.

Texting Etiquette: The Basics

Before diving into specific scenarios and examples, it's crucial to grasp the
basics of texting etiquette. These guidelines help ensure your messages are
well-received and effective:

Timing Tone Content

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Timing: When to text can be just as important as what to text. We'll explore
how timing can impact the way your messages are perceived
Tone: Since texts can't convey tone of voice, choosing your words carefully
is essential to convey the right message
Content: What you text should be purposeful and fitting for the stage of
your relationship.

This guide will provide you with actionable tips and real-life
examples to help you navigate various texting scenarios
confidently. Ready to transform your texting game?

!
Let's get started

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Texting Scenarios and
Examples

2.1 Initiating the Conversation (Texting First)

Strategic Timing and Power Dynamics

Initiating a text conversation with a man can seem daunting, but it's an excellent
opportunity to show interest and set the tone for potential interactions. This
section offers strategic insights into when and how to text first, empowering
you to take the lead in your dating life. Learn the best practices for sparking
interest without coming off as too eager, the benefits of making the first move,
and the key do’s and don’ts that will keep your texting game on point. Whether
you're following up after a great date or sharing a personal joke, the right
approach can make all the difference in cultivating a connection.

When to Text First:

After an Interesting Encounter: If you recently had a memorable interaction
(like a great first date or a fun casual encounter), sending a follow-up text
can show your interest and keep the momentum going
When You Have Something Meaningful to Share: If you come across
something that genuinely reminds you of him or an inside joke you share, it’s
a perfect opportunity to text. It shows you’re thinking about him in a natural,
organic way.

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 When Not to Text First:
Right After Receiving His Last Text: Give him some time to respond if he
has already been engaged in the conversation. Replying too quickly every
time can make you seem overly eager
During Unreasonably Late Hours: Unless it’s common for you two to text
late at night, avoid initiating texts during late hours as it might be
inconvenient or misinterpreted.

Empowering Benefits of Texting First:

Taking Charge of Your Dating Life: When you text first, you take control of
the pacing and direction of your interactions. It can be empowering to make
the first move and shows you’re confident and assertive
Shaping the Narrative: By initiating the conversation, you get to set the tone
and choose the topics. This allows you to steer the conversation towards
subjects where you feel most comfortable and interested
Eliminating Guesswork: Often, both parties might be interested but
hesitant to text first due to fear of seeming too eager or intrusive. When you
make the first move, you clear up any ambiguity about your interest, which
can lead to a more straightforward and rewarding communication.

What to Avoid:
Avoid Overly Committed Messages Early On: Sending messages that
assume a level of intimacy or commitment that hasn't been established can
be off-putting. Keep things light until your relationship develops more depth
Avoid Double Texting Too Soon: If he hasn’t responded to your first
message, wait a day or two before sending another. Patience is key in
showing that you’re interested but not desperate.

The Power of Positive Texting

Texting first not only breaks the ice but sets a positive, proactive tone for your
interactions. Women often feel more in control of the dating dynamics when
they aren’t always waiting for the man to make the first move. This shift can lead
to a more balanced and mutually respectful communication pattern.

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Starting a Conversation: Enhanced Examples and Tips

Examples:

I keep thinking about you and

it’s annoying me
Hey! I just saw [a movie/music
band/book]. This [movie/music
band/book] is amazing! You
should take a look!

This reminded me of you

... and send a song/ photo

or you can hit them with a ...

I'm at an amazing Italian
restaurant.. I finally found a
Remember this?
good pizza. Why aren't you here!

... and send a photo of something you

did or saw together, or an inside joke.

[for dating apps]:

[after the first date]:

Oh, wow! I was just about to
delete this app, and then I saw
In case you’re wondering: if you wanted
you. How convenient!
to text me without waiting three days,
you absolutely can.

Why it works:

It’s uplifting, confident, and personal. It also carries a subtle, flirty vibe that showcases
your confidence and empowerment
Sharing humor is a great way to connect and keep the vibe light and engaging
You let the person know you’re thinking of them and value them enough to write a
warm message specifically for them. It makes the receiver feel special, and making
people feel special is a key tenet of a good flirt.

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2.2 Flirting Over Text
Mastering the art of flirting over text can transform your interactions from
mundane to magnetic. This section delves into how to craft messages that
intrigue and attract, creating a playful and engaging dialogue. You'll learn how to
use subtle compliments, playful teases, and questions that spark curiosity to
captivate the interest of your texting partner. We also cover common pitfalls to
avoid, ensuring your flirty texts always strike the right tone. Whether you're
looking to ignite a new spark or keep the flame alive in ongoing conversations,
these strategies will help you flirt with finesse and confidence.

Flirty Text Examples to Catch His Interest

Example Why it works

I can't stop thinking about that Compliments that focus on personal

smile of yours. It's driving me attributes or interests rather than
crazy. generic praise make your text stand out.

This message radiates confidence, clarity,

You seem like a lot of fun, we and boldness. It reflects your self-worth
should plan something just the and your readiness to embrace and
two of us. express your pleasures and likes.

So, how many tries did it take A playful tease can be a great icebreaker
to take that profile picture? Or if done respectfully. It creates a fun
are you always that challenge and opens the door for witty
photogenic? banter.

I have a confession… I think you Sparking curiosity and inviting him to

might be the best person to engage in a playful debate can lead to an
help me solve a debate I’m interesting and lively conversation. It also
having. Should I go for the subtly places you both on the same
pizza or pasta here? team, creating a sense of camaraderie.

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Common Flirting Text Pitfalls:
Overuse of Emojis or Slangs: While emojis and slang can make texts feel
more personal and relatable, overusing them can detract from the sincerity
of the message. Use them sparingly to enhance, not overpower, your
message
Being Too Forward or Sexual: Early in the dating process, overly forward or
suggestive texts can be off-putting. It's important to match the tone and
comfort level of your counterpart and escalate gradually
Misreading the Tone: Always consider the context and previous tone of your
conversations. A message that might seem playful in one context can be
misinterpreted without the right groundwork.

Tips on Keeping the Flirtatious Conversation Engaging:

Reciprocity is Key: Pay attention to his responses. Flirting should be a two-
way street. If he reciprocates with similar playful or complimentary language,
it's a green light to continue. If his responses are short or unenthusiastic,
take it as a cue to slow down or switch topics
Timing Matters: The timing of your texts can add to the excitement.
Sometimes, a flirty text out of the blue can brighten his day and keep you on
his mind. However, respect his schedule—avoid late-night texts unless you
know he's up and responsive during those hours
Personal Touch: Tailor your texts to include something personal about him
or your relationship. Whether it's an inside joke, a shared experience, or
something unique you've noticed about him, personal touches make your
texts resonate more deeply.

Empowering Your Text Approach

Here in Affemity we advise embracing the art of subtlety and playfulness in
your texting. It's not just about sparking initial interest but also about
maintaining a fun, engaging communication style that can lead to deeper
connections. Flirting should feel like a dance—exciting, a bit mysterious, and
mutually enjoyable.

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2.3 Provoking an Invitation to a Date
Navigating the transition from texting to an actual date can be subtle yet
significant. This section equips you with tactful strategies to encourage your
texting partner to take the next step and suggest a face-to-face meeting. Learn
how to use shared interests, upcoming events, and playful challenges to
naturally lead conversations toward a date proposal. We'll also discuss what to
avoid to keep the interaction light and enjoyable, and how to maintain your
dignity if things don't immediately progress. Whether you're looking to deepen a
connection or start a new romantic adventure, these tips will help you set the
stage for memorable real-world encounters.

Subtle Texts to Suggest Interest in Meeting Up

Examples:
Are you available on Sunday night? Want
to check out that restaurant you
I just heard about this new coffee shop mentioned?
that serves the best cold brew. We
should check it!
As much as I enjoy texting with you, I would
love to have a face-to-face conversation.
There’s a street food festival next Want to grab dinner or drinks sometime?
weekend and that sounds amazing.
Trying out new foods is my go-to way
to unwind from work stress right now
I definitely need to get there! I've enjoyed our conversations over text,
but I'm curious if you're just as charming
in person.

Why it works:
By mentioning a new place or activity and linking it to a shared interest, you create a
natural opportunity for a date without making it feel forced. This approach keeps
things light and gives him the space to propose an actual date
Bringing up an event can spark excitement and make the idea of meeting up more
appealing. It’s about crafting an invitation that’s too good to resist
These messages clearly reflect your intentions and radiate your confidence, courage,
and aspirations.

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What to Avoid When Trying to Provoke a Date Invitation:

Being Too Direct Too Soon: While honesty is valuable, asking for a date too

bluntly can sometimes put unnecessary pressure on the situation. It’s

usually more effective to build up to the idea gradually through engaging

conversation

Overdoing the Hints: If you find yourself constantly dropping hints about

meeting up without any reciprocation, it might be time to pull back.

Overdoing it can seem desperate and may turn him off

Ignoring His Signals: Pay attention to how he responds to your suggestions.

If he seems non-committal or changes the subject, take it as a sign that he

might not be ready to meet up. Pushing beyond this point can be

counterproductive.

Strategies for Maintaining Your Cool and Dignity:

Confidence is Key: Always remember that your worth isn’t defined by

whether someone wants to go out with you. Keep your suggestions casual

and confident, and don’t hinge your self-esteem on the outcome

Read the Room: Gauge his level of interest through his texting behavior. If

he’s engaging enthusiastically with your texts, it’s a good sign. If not, don’t

force the issue; sometimes, the timing just isn’t right

Stay Positive and Patient: If he doesn’t take the bait initially, don’t get

discouraged. Maintain a positive tone in your texts and give him space.

Sometimes, a little patience can change the dynamic for the better.

2.4 When He Doesn't Respond Promptly or

Doesn't Initiate

Effective communication in dating isn't just about making connections; it's also

about handling the silence that comes when he doesn't respond promptly or

doesn't initiate texts. This section provides strategies for understanding and

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managing delayed responses and encouraging more active participation from
your texting partner. Learn how to remain patient and respectful, use
encouragement to foster more frequent initiation, and maintain your dignity
even when the communication seems one-sided. Whether you're dealing with

a busy schedule or a cooling interest, these tips will help you navigate the
complexities of texting dynamics without compromising your self-worth.

Handling Delayed Responses and Lack of Initiation

Ask him what happened if he hasn't explained yet:

Context Matters:
Before reacting, consider his usual communication patterns and any potential reasons for
his delay, like a busy schedule or personal issues.

Text:

Hi! I’ve missed your texts! How’s it going? Oh wow, I haven't heard from you in a while.
What's up?

Why it works:
This text shows you care without putting pressure on him to respond immediately. It’s
friendly and gives him an opportunity to share what’s been keeping him busy.

Politely explain he has to try harder than that:

Text:

I've been busy too, but

I don't really spend I'm only dating
I still make time to text time chasing after intentionally right now, so

people who are important people who can't I don't really have time for
to me, especially if they make time for me. someone who only texts
texted me first." once a month.

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Why it works:
You're a shining star, and you should be treated like one! If he wants the privilege of
connecting with the amazing YOU, he needs to show real effort—letting a week pass by
without a reply just doesn't measure up.

Give him another chance if he seems sorry:

Encouragement Over Pressure:
Maybe his phone really did break, or maybe he got busy and forgot to text you back. If he
usually shows genuine interest in you and his excuse sounds reasonable, it's fair to give
him the benefit of the doubt.

Text:
You can sense his interest if he typically
I'll overlook it just this once, responds quickly to your texts and calls,
especially since you're adorable ;) seems thrilled to see you, and often asks
you to join him for activities.

Why it works:
This approach shows that you value his messages and encourage him to share more,
fostering a mutual exchange.

Maintaining Your Cool and Dignity:

Stay Balanced and Diverse with Your Texts: If all your texts are about
meeting up or what he’s up to, it might become overwhelming. Mix up your
content with funny observations, interesting articles, or casual updates
about your day
Self-Worth is Key: Remember, your value doesn't decrease based on
someone's inability to see your worth. Keep your messages dignified and
avoid pleading for attention or responses.

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 Stay Confident and Busy: Show that you have a fulfilling life outside of

texting him. This not only boosts your own self-esteem but also makes you

more attractive and interesting

Read the Signals: If he consistently doesn’t respond or initiate, consider if

this is the type of communication you want in a relationship. Sometimes, no

response is a response, and it might be time to re-evaluate your interest.

2.4 When NOT to Text

Understanding when to pause or completely avoid texting can be just as crucial

as knowing what to say. This section explores various scenarios where it's better

to hold off from sending a message, to prevent misunderstandings and maintain

a respectful and attractive communication dynamic. We'll discuss the importance

of timing, the potential consequences of texting during emotionally charged

moments, and the benefits of exercising restraint. By recognizing when not to

text , you can enhance the quality of your interactions, preserve intrigue, and

ensure that your communication contributes positively to building relationships.

Understanding the Power of Restraint

Increases Respect and Attraction: By showing that you’re not overly

dependent on their attention, you increase your perceived value and respect.

Restraint can make your texts more impactful when you do send them

Prevents Misunderstandings: By choosing not to text in emotionally

charged or inappropriate times, you reduce the risk of misunderstandings

that can be difficult to resolve over text

Maintains Mystery and Interest: Sometimes, a little mystery goes a long

way. Not texting in every situation keeps the other person interested and

wondering about you, which can be an attractive quality.

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Scenarios Where Texting Might Not Be Appropriate

During Emotional Highs or Lows:

Avoid texting when you're feeling extremely emotional, such as right after a
disagreement, when you’re overly excited, or deeply upset. Texts sent in these
states can often be misinterpreted or regretted later.

Text example to avoid Why it's problematic

It puts immediate pressure on

I can’t believe you would do this

the recipient and can escalate

to me! We need to talk right now!

the situation unnecessarily.

Late at Night:
Unless you have established that late-night texts are acceptable in your
communication dynamic, avoid texting late at night as it can come across as
intrusive or inconsiderate.

Text example to avoid Why it's problematic

Hey, are you awake? Just thinking It might put him on the spot and can be
about you and couldn’t sleep. perceived as too intimate too soon.

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 When You’re Expecting an Immediate Response:
If you’re in a situation where you need immediate answers or decisions, texting
might not be the best communication method. Urgency can often be better
handled in person or over a phone call.

Text example to avoid Why it's problematic

Texting doesn’t always allow for

We need to decide this now.
nuanced conversation and can add
What do you think?
unnecessary pressure.

When You’ve Already Sent Multiple Unanswered Texts:

If your previous messages haven’t been responded to, sending more won’t likely
change the outcome. It’s best to wait and give the person space to respond.

Text example to avoid Why it's problematic

Hello? Did you get my last It can come off as needy and may push
messages? the person further away.

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Additional Tips and
Confidence Boosters

Effective texting goes beyond knowing what to say and when to say it - it's also
about projecting confidence and staying true to your authentic self. This
section offers a collection of essential tips to refine your texting strategies,
boost your self-confidence, and engage more positively in digital interactions.
From keeping your messages concise and engaging to practicing self-
affirmation and embracing rejection as part of personal growth, these insights
will empower you to navigate the complex landscape of digital dating with poise
and resilience. Whether you're just starting to text someone new or trying to
maintain the spark in ongoing conversations, these tips will help you
communicate with confidence and clarity.

General Tips for Texting Men Effectively:

Keep Texts Concise and Engaging: Long, verbose texts can overwhelm or
bore the recipient. Try to keep your messages concise but engaging, using
just enough words to pique interest and keep the conversation flowing
Use Humor Wisely: A well-timed joke or a playful comment can lighten the
mood and strengthen your connection. However, be mindful of the type of
humor you use and ensure it's appropriate for your level of familiarity with
the person
Be True to Your Personality: Don’t try to be someone you’re not just to
impress someone. Authenticity attracts, and being genuine in your texts will
likely encourage a more honest and open exchange.

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 Timing is Everything: Pay attention to when he typically responds to your
texts and try to mirror his texting habits. This synchronicity can make your
interactions more harmonious and show that you’re considerate of his routine.

Confidence Boosters:
Remember Your Worth: Always keep in mind that you deserve respect and
attention. Your self-worth shouldn’t be tied to someone’s text responses or
the frequency of messages. Confidence is attractive and empowering
Practice Self-Affirmations: Positive self-talk can boost your confidence
tremendously. Before you text, remind yourself of your qualities and
strengths. This mindset will shine through in your messages and make you
more attractive
Stay Active and Socially Engaged: Engaging in activities you love and
spending time with friends can enrich your life and make you more
interesting. A fulfilling life will not only keep you happy but also make your
conversations richer and more varied.

Motivational Advice:
Be Fearless in Your Pursuit of Happiness: If texting someone makes you
happy, don’t overthink it—just do it with respect and consideration. Being
fearless doesn’t mean being reckless; it means being bold in the pursuit of
what brings you joy
Embrace Rejection as Part of Growth: Not every interaction will lead to the
outcome you hope for, and that's okay. Each experience is a step towards
learning what works best for you in relationships
Stay Positive and Keep Moving Forward: Always keep a positive outlook. If
things don’t work out with one person, it’s not the end. Each conversation is
a learning opportunity and a step closer to finding someone who truly
resonates with your values and personality.

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 How to Text

a Guy You Like

Bonus!

BEFORE AFTER

I had a great time Last night was like a

last night. teaser trailer.

Do you even miss me? Rumor has it you might be

missing someone special…

Are you free to talk? Dare to interrupt my

schedule?

Haven’t heard from you Playing hard to get?

in a while.

Are you ignoring me? Your silence is loud

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 How to text your
Man when you’re
in relationship
Bonus!

BEFORE AFTER

Do you ever think Sometimes I wonder

about us? about the ‘what ifs,’ but I’m
focused on the ‘what now’

You haven’t replied all day.
 A day without your texts

is like a workday without
coffee – manageable, but

something’s definitely
missing

You’re too busy for me. How about the art of the
perfect ‘thinking of you’ text?

We need to talk, when I know you’re swamped,

are you free? but let’s pencil in a moment
of ‘us time’ – it might just be
the break you need.

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